This Woman's Work
by Regal-Song
Summary: I feel I need to share that this story isn't for everyone. Based heavily around Calleigh dealing with Breast Cancer, this story focuses on her, Eric and everything that they're forced to go through in fighting it off, together.
1. Chapter 1

My inspiration for this story, was based in both this song and the dance performed by Ade and Melissa on "So You Think You Can Dance" Top 8. The story of the choreoraphy, was of a woman battling Breast Cancer and the man who's strength, carries her through it. From the man's perspective, carrying and caring for her, touching her so gently. And her trust in him, throwing herself into his arms, crying into his chest. It was simply amazing and it touched my soul unlike any other dance I've ever seen. When I saw it, I adored it and when I analysed it from watching it repeatedly, I realised that I liked to picture Eric and Calleigh this way. Calleigh with Melissa's trust in her partner and Eric, with Ade's strength and presence and hope. I really hope that I can portray well, what I felt when watching this dance. If Tyce Diorio doesn't get an Emmy for it, like Nigel said, I'll be hugely surprised.

Littered with small quotes related to coping with Cancer, interspersed with lyrics from this song. I hope you enjoy.

* * *

_**All The Things I Should've Said That I Never Said,  
All The Things We Should Have Done That We Never Did,  
All The Things I Should've Given But I Didn't,  
Oh Darling Make It Go, Make It Go Away.  
**_~ Maxwell, _This Woman's Work_

* * *

As the sun barely grazed the horizon across Miami beach, Alexx crouched over the body of a young woman, no older than twenty-five who seemed to have fallen victim to a crime based purely on wrong place, wrong time. Running her fingers along the girl's cheek, she frowned and could feel the tears prick at her eyes, like they so often did when someone so young, met such an unfair end. "Poor baby," She whispered, hearing Eric step up beside her in the sand, knowing him, even though she didn't look to him. "you barely started to live, didn't you."

Eric almost hated it when he caught her like this. So wrapped up in the victim, so entwined in their story, even before she'd discovered what that story was. Sometimes it worried him, the way she could become so attached, so quickly. But then he'd look around himself at the rest of them and realise that, without her, the victims would never have that connection to the world around them. They'd never have the care that they deserved, because the rest of the team kept themselves so detached. They respected the victims, they fought for them, but they never let themselves get as close to them as Alexx did, because it just hurt too much.

"Hey Alexx," He forced a smile, crouching down on one knee and feeling the damp sand seeping through his pants as the gently growing sunshine warmed his back.

"Morning, baby." She smiled up at him, meeting his eyes through those thick black glasses that hid the momentary pain that washed over her face at every crime scene. Sometimes he wondered if one day, she'd just break down. But that wasn't the way she was. He knew that every case touched her, that every victim pulled at her heart, but he also knew that every night she went home, she ate dinner with her family and she felt the hope and love and life that kept her going from day to day. She had the privilege of that balance and sometimes, he was jealous of her. "Where's Calleigh?" She questioned and his eyes snapped up at her, blinking a few times before he was completely able to pull himself out of his thoughts. "Eric," She pressed.

He licked his lips. "Oh, ah, she had an appointment this morning. She called me, asked if I could cover the scene."

Alexx's faint smile turned into a frown. "What kind of appointment? Is she alright?"

"I don't know Alexx," He flipped open his kit, pulling on a pair of gloves as he focused his eyes on the bruises along the young girl's arm. "I'm sure she's fine, we'll just have to see when she gets back."

He knew that Alexx knew about their relationship, Calleigh had laughed about letting it slip to her when it happened and he'd been grateful at the time, that they'd been able to share it with one of the people he respected and cared for the most. And as intuitive as she was, he knew that she was aware he was holding something back. But to her credit, she didn't press and he was grateful for that. He didn't know if he'd be able to voice the fears that had coursed through him the previous night, because the idea of the strongest woman he knew, facing something so small and insidious, was just not something he thought he was ready to accept, just yet.

Alexx smiled wanly, turning her eyes back to the body as he flipped his camera on. She knew that something was brewing in him. The normally bright and cheerful young man that she considered one of her own sons, was lost in a small storm inside his head. She watched him as he fiddled with the camera, his frown crinkling his handsome face and the tension in his shoulders was palpable. Something was bothering him, something big. And she only hoped that in time, he'd come to her or at the very least, she'd seen his light return after seeing Calleigh later in the day.

_**

* * *

**_

"I know you've got a little life in you yet.  
I know you've got a lot of strength left."

* * *

Calleigh faltered as she stepped off the elevator. She took two steps out, breathing the smell of the lab in deeply - the smell of the chemicals, coffee and the lingering metallic dust from the firing range just past the reception desk - before taking a hesitant step back. _'I can't do this'_ - she stammered in her mind, clutching the strap of her handbag across her chest and feeling that dull ache in her heart. _'I'm not strong enough for this'_.

Standing in the centre of the lobby, Calleigh brushed her ankles together nervously, watching the world continue on as if she weren't even there, watching how the lab still managed to cope, when she wasn't around. And that in itself, sparked a fear in her that she hadn't ever pondered until that moment. Ahead of her, she caught sight of Eric stepping out of the Trace lab and on instinct, she turned on her heel and moved as quickly as she could, towards the locker-room. She didn't know that he'd seen her, didn't know that he'd seen the flash of panic that sparked in her eyes.

Stumbling into the darkened room, Calleigh was thankful for the shadows that shrouded the room in countless corners were she could curl up and disappear if she needed. She dropped her handbag just short of her closed locker and with a deep, anguished breath, she pressed her forehead against the cold metal, blinking rapidly to ward off tears.

"Cal," His voice behind her whispered. Slowly, her eyes closed and her breath caught in her throat. She wasn't ready for this, she wasn't ready for his compassion, his care. She wasn't ready to look up and see the love in his eyes because she was frightened that she just might break if she looked too deep. "Calleigh, look at me." He choked, begging but not yet reaching out to touch her and the part of her that wanted so desperately for him to do it, knew that he kept his distance because he knew it's what she needed, not because he wanted the space between them in any way, shape or form. He was a toucher, a holder. He needed to reach out and feel something tangible because as much pain as it caused, he needed this to be real. She needed to step away, to close herself off, to feel nothing because the last thing she wanted in the world, was for this to be real.

He was about to open his mouth and call her name again, but she turned, pressing her back into the hard metal of the lockers because she needed the strength of something solid at her back that wasn't his warm, comforting embrace. She knew that if he touched her now, she'd never be able to get the words out and she knew that he needed to know the truth. Wrapping her arms around herself, she flinched when he reached out to touch the tips of his fingers to her elbow, recoiling as though he'd never tried it and she watched painfully, as his fingers curled back into his hand. Feeling so much further away from her than she ever wanted his hands.

"It wasn't nothing," She rasped and as she focused her eyes on the buttons of his red, floral shirt, she could see his chest rising higher and falling deeper as his heart pounded behind it.

"Cal," That one word, those three simple letters that formed the breadth of her name on his lips, tore at her heart in a way she'd never thought possible. It was frustratingly silent in the room, as the weight of her news was finally clawing it's way between them. He'd been there, standing in the shower with her the week before, he'd seen the terror in her eyes as she'd found the one thing, no woman ever wanted to find. He'd been there last night, when the doctor had called with her results, unwilling to give them so freely over the phone.

He'd begged to go with her. Threatened to call in sick that morning, but she'd insisted that he go, asked him politely to answer the call-out as she'd stepped out into the crisp, fresh air of dawn and closed the front door of her home - their home - with a quiet, controlled click, behind her.

"The Doctor said that it was a malignant tumor; Ductal Carcinoma, I think he called it." She nodded, swallowing deeply and avoiding with all of the strength she had, meeting his eyes. "It's fairly advanced, he said."

"Calleigh, I,"

She cut him off, raising her chin high and taking a deep breath as she met his eyes, refusing to let the few tears forming in the corners of her eyes, fall. "I'm booked in for surgery next week. And after that, he wants to start me on a course of chemotherapy."

"What?" Eric's mouth fell open and within seconds, the barriers he was keeping between them were all but dissolved. He reached out, grasping her elbows and pulling her towards him, holding her close and crouching down, low enough to meet her eyes. "Calleigh, this," He breathed. "this is insane."

"I know," She choked, finally letting her arms fall to her sides, letting his hands roam up over her shoulders until his palms were pressed against her cheeks. "Eric," She paused, feeling her heart beating faster as he ran his fingers through her hair, holding her head in his hands as her fingers itched to touch him, feel him so close to her. But she didn't touch him, because if she did in that very moment, she wouldn't have been able to divulge the one truth that was eating her alive. "and I'm _terrified_."

In a single heartbeat she was held tightly in his embrace. He wrapped his arms around her shoulders, pulling her against him ferociously as her small hands wound around his waist and clung desperately to the bunched fabric of his shirt at the small of his back. And like she knew it would, as soon as she was locked in his protective hold, her resolve faltered, the dam broke and her tears came. Her knees crumpled out from under her and she felt her back slide down the lockers. Eric's arms stayed around her and her face stayed buried in his chest as the pair of them slid down to the floor together. She could feel the tears pouring from her eyes and she knew, she just knew, that her mascara was staining the small white flowers that covered his chest. "I can't do this," She cried, clinging to him, pulling him down and further into her until he was on his knees, clutching her like the broken pieces of a china doll.

"Yes you can," He whispered, running his fingers through her hair, holding her close to his chest and she could feel his strong hand gripping the back of her neck through the tousled blond tendrils that had also fallen in her face. For a moment, vanity flashed in her eyes as she realised that one day soon, she wasn't going to be able to look at him through cascading blond locks. He wasn't going to be able to smile like a child as he played with her hair whilst he thought she was sleeping. And it was then, she realised, that she was focusing on the one thing she thought she'd fear the most, to avoid the nagging thought that if this surgery didn't work, she could lose not only her hair, but her breasts. She could lose her ovaries and thinking of her own life as secondary, she was terrified that she'd never meet the eyes of a dark-skinned child who'd call _him _'Papi' and run in the house after being told it was dangerous.

"No," She wept. "it's not fair."

"No," Eric smiled, brushing the hair out of her eyes and for the first time since they'd fallen to the ground together, he let her see the tears that were trickling down his face. "no, Cal, it's _not _fair. But you know what," He lent forward, kissing her forehead with the same reverence he'd shown her the first time he spent the night in her bed.

"What?" She sobbed, feeling the tears ebbing away as he lay gentle kisses across her face.

"We're going to get through it."

"You can't know that." She choked, dropping her eyes to his chest, but he was stronger. He gripped her head in his hands, forcefully making her look up at him as he brushed his thumb gently across her cheek.

"Yes I can," He whispered. Sitting on his legs and pulling her up until she was on her knees before him. "I can," He reiterated and Calleigh's resolve struggled with her anguish again, begging her to let it give up so that she could fall into his arms and disappear. "because you're the strongest person I know. And you're going to spend the rest of _my_ life, proving it."

"Eric," She shook her head but he stopped her.

"No, Cal, you can't do this. You have to fight, even now."

"But what if I can't?" She questioned. "What if I'm really not strong enough."

Eric stopped everything for a moment. His thumb on her cheek stilled, his fingers in her hair stopped drawing soothing circles on her scalp, his arms tucked tightly under her arms and around her shoulders loosened a little and his breathing paused before it all burst out of him in waves as he clung to her. "Then no woman in history would have ever beaten this. Because no one is as strong as you."

**

"Eric," Horatio stepped up behind him in the fingerprinting lab and with a heavy breath, he knew what the man was going to ask. "how is she coping?" Turning slowly, Eric placed his evidence down on the table, to make sure his trembling hands didn't let it fall to the floor. He nodded, letting out a shuddered breath that didn't go unnoticed by Horatio.

"She's Calleigh," He shrugged, lacking in any better way to explain it. "she's," He shook his head, unable to free himself of the cobwebs that had plagued him all of the previous day and well into the night, when he'd lain there, watching her sleep and praying silently that he had the strength to pull her through this. "she's coping," He paused, seeing the skepticism in the older man's eyes. "she's trying."

"I just wish there was something I could," He stopped himself and Eric studied the man standing before him. His shoulders were slumped, his glasses were curiously missing and his face looked drawn and lost. Even though he didn't have his sunglasses to hold, Horatio's nervousness manifested itself in the twitching of his fingers, where his glasses normally would have been.

"You're doing it," He answered softly. "she's trying to be strong, but I'm scared that if she doesn't have us backing her every single step of the way, she's going to shut down." There, it was out there, Eric's worst fear realised in one single sentence. A tear escaped his eye and Eric brushed it away quickly, hoping Horatio hadn't seen it. If he had, it wasn't mentioned and Eric was grateful for that. "Look, H," He started, turning in his spot so that he could look his friend in the eye, straight on.

"Yes, Eric?"

"Calleigh and I have talked about this and I was going to come to you later today, but I guess now's as good a time as any." Eric watched him nod slowly, knowing that in Horatio's mind, he was already putting the pieces together, though he wouldn't say anything out loud, that he didn't feel Eric was comfortable telling him first. "I'm going to be with Calleigh on this," He took a deep breath. "we've been in this relationship for so many months and we're just sick of dancing around and running away and hoping that there's going to be some chance for us."

"What are you saying, Eric?"

_Smiling out at the sunset, Calleigh took a deep breath as his arms curled around her and his hands rested firmly on the railing in front of her. The air was cool, for a Spring Miami evening, but with his chest pressed to his back and his breath on the back of her neck, she could barely feel the crisp chill in the air. "Hey," He whispered, pressing a kiss behind her ear as she leant into him, reaching for his arms and pulling them around until their hands were entwined together against her stomach. "what are you doing out here?"_

_"Just thinking," She smiled, closing her eyes and savouring the feel of him._

_"Mm," His lips curl up against her earlobe. "about what?"_

_"Everything that's going to change. You, us, what we can't have."_

_"Calleigh," He sighed, feeling her tense in front of him, so he held her tighter, refusing to let her walk away from him even if she'd wanted to. "we can have everything we want. We've just got to work a little harder to get it. It doesn't mean we can't have it."_

_"It's the story of my life, though," She whispered dejectedly. "do a little more housework, so my parents would leave me out of their arguments. Work a little harder in school, so I could move away to college instead of staying home. Work a little harder at the academy, because no one took me seriously. Wait a little longer for the best relationship of my life, only to have to fight to keep it, hide it to have it and now this," She slumped back against him, closing her eyes and letting him simply hold her. "it's too much."_

_Silence descended over them for a while, wrapping them in the cool breeze and the feel of each other until Eric found the strength to speak. "Calleigh, I don't think this would have happened to you, if you weren't able to handle it."_

_"It happens to people every day, Eric, it's not as simple as that."_

_"But it can be," He choked. "it can be as simple as that. You've proved time and again, that you're a fighter. You don't back down and you certainly don't let go until you have what you want." He smiled, tilting his head around until he could meet her eyes. "and I know, I'm patient, I've waited for you for so long. Now that I have you, Cal," He grinned, leaning down to press a kiss to her lips. "now that I have you, I'm not going to let this take you away."_

_It took nearly all of her energy, to smile up at him. But once the corners of her mouth twitched heavenward ever so slightly, the warmth of his arms and the depth of his words did the rest. "Eric," With her eyes blinking shut, she lent her head back into the crook of his arm and sighed._

_"I tell you what," He brushed her hair away from her face and wrapped his arms tighter around her. "tomorrow, I'll go to Horatio and I'll tell him everything about us. I'll let him know that I want to be with you, whenever you need me."_

_"Eric, you can't do that,"_

_"I can," He grinned. "I will, it's done. I'm not going to let you go through this alone."_

"I'm saying, H, that for the past eight months, Calleigh and I have been together," He met the man's eyes. "I know that it's inappropriate and it's unprofessional but it's done and I really, honestly care for her, I can't just sit back and watch her go through this." The two men stood there for several moments in silence. Eric looked out to the hall where friends and colleagues walked on by without a clue as to what was going on within. He'd only told Horatio that morning, about the news Calleigh had received the previous day. She'd sat there in silence, gripping his hand tightly and fighting the tears that burned at her eyes, whenever she was forced to let the words leave her lips. And the for the first time in over ten years of working in the lab, she was thankful for Horatio's kind, quiet voice, urging her to go home and rest.

"Eric," He nodded, adjusting his footing. "I understand what you're saying. And I'll tell you what," He smiled softly. "Keep me apprised of Calleigh's situation, get your work done and I'll smooth things over with Stetler if any questions arise."

"What about the team?" Eric frowned, knowing that it wasn't only the three of them that were going to bear the brunt of this. He knew that, even though he and Horatio had known her the longest, Natalia, Ryan and Frank felt just as close to her and they were going to need reassurance that she was alright. They were going to want to be there with them. And Alexx, he could barely even stomach the thought of how Alexx was going to react to the news. Just the day before, he'd told her that Calleigh was fine, that there was nothing to worry about. And now they were going to have to tell her that the woman she'd mothered for near to ten years, had Breast Cancer.

"I'll deal with the team. Now, Eric, what I want you to do right now is head home, spend some time with Calleigh and make sure she's alright. Her surgery is scheduled for Tuesday, is that correct?"

Eric nodded.

"Alright then, I expect to see you Monday just to finish off your outstanding paperwork. But as of Tuesday, you're on call for her, do you understand me?" Eric nodded again, slower, dumbfounded that Horatio was being so supportive in the face of the fact they'd lied to him for over eight months. Apparently, none of that mattered right now and the most important thing was Calleigh.

"Alright. Thanks, H."

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

_**"Women agonize over cancer;  
we take as a personal threat, the lump in every friend's breast."  
**_~ Martha Weinman Lear, _Heartsounds_

* * *

Natalia stopped short when she opened the door to Horatio's office, expecting to see him sitting behind his desk, but instead her eyes were drawn to Ryan, slouching against the back wall with his arms crossed over his chest, Frank standing just to her left inside the door, Valera next to him and Alexx, sitting with her hands clasped in her lap, in one of the two chairs opposite the desk.

"Miss Boa Vista," Horatio greeted, partially standing up as he gestured for her to take the seat just beside Alexx.

"What's going on?" She questioned, noting Ryan's shrug and Alexx' worried expression.

"I have some news that needs to be shared with the whole team."

"Where's Delko and Calleigh, shouldn't they be here?" Frank questioned, chewing on the inside of his cheek and refusing to admit that he was feeling as anxious as Alexx looked. Horatio seemed to take his time in answering the question and Natalia watched him as she dug her fingernails into the wooden armrests, feeling a sense of foreboding grow over her that made it seem like the room was filled with a thick, heavy smoke.

"Actually, this concerns the both of them."

"H," Ryan huffed. "what exactly is this all about?"

Horatio took a deep breath and stood, pressing his palms to the desk and strategically avoiding Alexx' eyes because he knew that if he saw the worry in her almost black orbs, he wouldn't know how to say what needed to be said. "Last week, Miss Duquesne informed me that she has been diagnosed with early stage breast cancer." The room was silent, but for three strangled gasps and the almost palpable sound of five rapidly beating hearts.

"Breast Cancer," Natalia choked out, barely able to form the words without a tear coming to her eye. She turned to Alexx, who hadn't been so reserved in immediately showing her anguish because if the tears streaming down her face were any indication, her heart had just broken into a million tiny shards. So when the moment struck, both women reached out for each other and gripped hands tightly. Natalia didn't know what to do or say, she barely knew how to react but for the sudden emptiness she could feel around her heart.

"Yes," Horatio nodded solemnly. "Eric asked that I inform you all this morning, that she's scheduled for surgery today. He's on his way there right now."

"What? So soon?" Valera gasped, stepping away from the wall with her arms wrapped tightly around herself. Frank reached forward, grasping her shoulder, though he didn't utter a word. Not even when she reached up and clasped her hand over his, gripping his fingers as a sort of lifeline. No one had questioned why Eric was the one on his way to sit by her side, sit outside her room and ultimately spend the next few agonising hours, waiting. It was a fact that Horatio was incredibly grateful for, because he didn't know if he had it in him, to explain everything that had transpired over the last few days. Though, as he studied their faces he realised that he needed to hand them credit, the chances of them already having known that Calleigh meant the world to Eric, before he did, weren't as slim as one might think.

"I don't know the exact details. But she is going to need all of your support and understanding through this."

"Of course, Horatio," Alexx scoffed. "she has it. She'll always have it, she," Alexx could no longer contain herself, breaking down into heaving sobs as she ran from her chair, pushing her way between Frank and Valera in order to escape the room as quickly as she could, one hand clasped over her mouth. Natalia moved to follow her, but Ryan's hands pressed to her shoulders and his thumbs gently caressing the back of her neck, stopped her silent.

"Let her go," He whispered, gripping her tighter as though it could ease her pain in any way. Natalia closed her eyes tightly, feeling the weight in the room multiply to the point where she could barely breathe. The room started to spin and her eyes became misty, Horatio ahead of her started to blur, all before she realised that she too, was crying.

"No, Ryan, I have to go." She muttered, grabbing Valera's hand as she ran out of the room, following Alexx. The three men left behind, had nothing left to do but stare at each other in surprise and confusion, each one aching for Calleigh and the three women that were bound to be weeping all the way to, and once they reached, the chilling silence of Autopsy.

* * *

"Alexx," Natalia tried tentatively with one hand pressed to the handle of the door and Valera's hand on her back. The Autopsy theatre was silent and cold and dark and as hard as she tried, she couldn't see Alexx through the shadows. "Alexx," She called again, curling her fingers with Valera's as the two women stepped inside, letting the door close behind them with a thud.

"She's going to get through this," A voice from the other end of the theatre, whispered. "she has to."

"Yeah," Valera answered, meeting Natalia's eyes for a moment. "she has to. She's Calleigh."

* * *

**_Life without faith in something is too narrow a space to live._**  
~George Lancaster Spalding

* * *

Calleigh straightened down her hospital gown as she sat up in the bed, waiting. She'd never been so nervous. Her palms were sweating and as she watched the numbers tick over on the clock, she could feel her heart-rate increasing. Her Dad had said he'd be there, Eric had said he'd be there and for the past hour, she'd been sitting alone in her room tossing the blankets on and off because she couldn't decide if she was hot or cold and neither Eric nor her father had arrived.

"Eric!" She cried, as he ducked in the door, smiling at the relief in her eyes. "I thought you weren't going to make it."

"Hey," He moved to sit beside her, lifting her hand up so that he could kiss her knuckles."I wouldn't miss it. You're going to be fine."

"Piece of cake, right." She stated, sucking in a deep breath as he moved closer on the bed and ducked his head to meet her eyes, close enough that she could feel his breath on her cheeks. He reached up, brushing his thumb gently across her brow as she frowned and he nodded.

"Yeah," He whispered. "for you it will be."

Calleigh chuckled sardonically. "You've got too much faith in me, Eric."

"No," He grinned, holding his hands tightly to hers, down in her lap. "no, I think I've got just enough." There was a knock at the door and Eric spun around before she could respond, to find the Doctor standing there, with a folder pressed to his chest as he looked upon them questioningly.

"Eric," She called, stopping him before he could invite the Doctor in.

"What's up?" He whispered, just as low as she had spoken.

"Can I tell you something?"

For several moments, the Doctor stood by the door with a small smile on his lips, watching patients and interns wandering the halls as the Janitor dragged a mop and bucket across from the elevator and the nurses down at the station, passed around a box of Guylian chocolates.

"Of course," Eric kissed her hand again and Calleigh blushed, swallowing away her nervousness.

"I think," She looked down at their hands, running her thumbs over his as she let her voice drop to a barely audible level. "I think I love you." They stared into each others eyes and whilst Calleigh though she saw a new sparkle there, what Eric saw was the same glistening kaleidoscope he'd always seen and he grinned.

"You had better not be saying that, just so I'll be here when you wake up." Eric joked, mock-seriously and after glaring at him for a moment, Calleigh laughed through tears and sniffled to clear her head.

"No," She continued to laugh. "no, I don't think so."

"Good," Eric smirked, leaning forward to press a kiss to her lips. "that's better than good. Do you want in on a little secret," He whispered, glancing at the Doctor again before conspiratorially leaning closer to her.

"What's that?"

"I will be here, when you wake up." Jumping up from the bed, Eric dashed across the room and patted the Doctor on the shoulder as he threw Calleigh another smirk and disappeared out the door. Calleigh's mouth hung open as she watched him go, barely even seeing the Doctor as he crossed to the bed, or her father for that matter, as the man came in hidden behind a large vase of white tulips.

"Hey, Lambchop." Her Dad kissed her cheek and Calleigh's heart warmed as he held her hand and sat down in the chair beside her, listening intently as the Doctor explained to her, exactly what they were going to do. She didn't see her father meet Eric's eyes, as he stood slumped against the door-frame with a wistful smile on his lips but she pulled his hand up to her face when he gripped it tighter and pressed it to her cheek, finding herself comforting him as the Doctor explained the surgery and the time involved in removing the tumor from her breast.

* * *

_**A father is always making his baby into a little woman.  
And when she is a woman he turns her back again.**_  
~Enid Bagnold

* * *

Eric sat with his hand on his knee, watching it bob up and down as his leg shook. He caught Duke's eye a couple of times, staring at him from across the room before he looked away and bit down hard on his bottom lip. It had been nearly forty-five minutes and he could swear he was already losing his mind. "She's going to get through this." Duke stated, catching Eric slightly off-guard. He looked up at him with a determined frown on his face.

"Yes, she will."

Licking his lips, Duke stood up and made his way across the room, hesitantly taking the seat beside him. "I wanted to thank you," He said, resting his hands on his knees and looking across the waiting room at the faded floral wallpaper.

"What for?"

"For being here," He shrugged as Eric looked up at him and he added. "for her, I mean. You know, I've never been so scared in my life. That's my little girl in there," He waved his arm towards the closed doors and Eric caught a glimpse of the pain in his voice. "and she was telling _me_ that it's going to be okay." Eric chuckled, taking a deep breath and nodding his approval of that. If anyone knew Calleigh's affinity for making sure the world around her felt okay, it was the two men sitting side by side in the sterile waiting room, as different as two men can be, sharing a common hope.

"It's a cycle then, I guess." Eric commented and Duke looked up at him, studying his face intently.

"You tell her, she tells me?"

_Duke watched from the front porch of the large plantation home he'd managed to keep, due to his inheritance and not the abismal career in law that he'd swallowed down the bottom of a bottle of whiskey. The shutters were in need of repair and as he sat there, listening to their happy footsteps running in and out of the house, he knew that the front door squeeked. But he was hesitant to fix any of it. Still blinking off the last vestiges of his most recent hangover, it was moments like this where he regretted every single mistake. When he'd watch her twirling around the front yard, with her long, curled blond hair whipping around after her, tied up in long pigtails with the delicate pink ribbons that would, no doubt, lay forgotton on the grass by the end of the day. She was beautiful, she was mesmerizing and when he watched her like this, so happy and free, he wished giving it all up for her was as simple as it sounded._

_He'd danced with the idea more than once. Looking into her eyes, it was as simple as yes or no. But when she was tucked away in her bed, sleeping peacefully and unaware of the world around her, when he was downstairs, staring down he neck of a bottle of Jack, it wasn't ever as simple as that. When she'd call sleepily down the stairs for her Daddy, he'd internally slap himself for chastising her, after all, she was only a child. She was his baby._

_Watching her run and play, it made him feel as though she was invincible. Watching her laugh and joke with the neighbours little boy, he couldn't help but live in the imaginary land where he beleived that she'd be this way forever. "Daddy!" She called, dashing across the yard, knowing instinctually, that in the waking hours the chances of being chastised for her affection were slimmer, but not gone. And he found that he didn't have the energy to hide his displeasure at the hesitance on her perfect little face._

_"What's wrong, Lambchop?" He answered, hoping that the endearment would aid in comforting her, if only a little._

_"You look sad." She smiled, stepping into the space between his knees and grinning widely when he picked her up and rested her on his lap._

_"I'm just thinking, sweetheart."_

_"About Mamma?"_

_Five years old, and she had the instincts of a seasoned adult. She was wrong, of course, but he had to give her credit for sewing together the fight he'd had with his wife the night before, her absence that morning and his all but silent demeanor just now. "No, baby," He grinned, letting his current ponderings go in favour of holding her, being with her._

_"What then?"_

_"Just," He lent forward to kiss her nose gently. "you."_

_"Me?" She giggled. "Daddy, what have I done?"_

_"You're here, Lambchop, that's enough for your Daddy. Stay like you are now, forever. Can you do that for Daddy?"_

_Calleigh laughed heartily, that bright smile being the one trait that had first drawn him to her mother and he couldn't help but melt whenever he saw it. Wrapping her arms tightly around his neck, she pulled herself against him, sitting in his lap with her whole little body curled into his as she continued to laugh. "Daddy," She kissed his cheek. "I can't do that. I've got too much to do. And I have to grow up for that."_

_"And what are these things that you're going to do?" He questioned, not quite sure if he was ready for the answer._

_"I don't know, Daddy." She laughed. "Listen," She whispered, leaning her forehead against his and and holding a finger over her lips to silence him. They could hear birds churping in the trees, crickets and the sounds of the roads a mile away, buzzing with the sound of the world, continuing on. "I'm already growing, you can hear it."_

Eric nodded. "Yeah, something like that."

"But who tells you?" Duke watched him thoughtfully and Eric looked down at his hands, studying his palms before turning them over and studying his knuckles as if they could distract him from the question.

"No one," Eric spoke softly. "but she has this understanding that I'm always going to be here. I tell her every day. The trick is," He looked up, making an effort to meet the man's eyes. Regardless of the fact that he'd lost respect for him, every single time Calleigh had pulled herself out of their bed in the middle of the night to go and pick her father up. Regardless of every time he'd called her away from a romantic dinner or asked him personally, to drag his sorry ass home so that he didn't have to explain his most recent relapse to her face, he was Calleigh's father and Eric couldn't help the want to reassure him. "I don't let her see that I'm petrified."

TBC


	3. Chapter 3

**_Some days there won't be a song in your heart.  
_**_**Sing anyway.**_  
~ Emory Austin

* * *

Making her way into the house slowly, with her kit gripped tightly in her hand, Calleigh ignored all of the eyes on her, watching her every move, measuring her every breath as though she'd break at any moment. At least, that's what she thought. She caught Ryan's eye from across the room, as he snapped the crime scene photos and took measurements for his sketches. He smiled a greeting, clearing his throat nervously as he caught sight of Eric over her left shoulder. Calleigh looked up at him, nodded her response as she bent down and started searching through her kit.

Eric studied her from behind, watching as she seemed to focus more intently on her kit than he'd noticed before. She scratched her brow and he knew from the slight twitch in her back, that her scar was bothering her. The dull ache had developed nearly a week after the surgery, when the stitches were already starting to heal and the scar tissue seemed to have woken up - for lack of a better word - from the shock of the surgery. He'd heard her crying at night, holding her clenched fist to her mouth in order to muffle the sobs. Instead of calling her on it, instead of trying to chase the tears away, he'd wrapped his arms around her, holding her back close to his chest and placing gentle kisses on her temple.

Slipping her gloves on, Eric smiled quietly to himself as she stood up straight, took a deep breath and immediately started collecting the evidence. "So what have we got?" She questioned and Ryan looked up, glancing between her and Eric before quickly remembering that if she caught him checking with Eric, she'd likely shoot him.

"Ah," He stammered. "gunshot wound to the abdomen, looks to be defensive, so Alexx says. So far the crime scene reflects that. Also," He pointed back towards the front door that she'd walked through, noting her wince slightly at the sudden turn, but making sure not to mention it. "looks like the attacker broke through the front."

"Good work," She nodded, leaning down to grab her kit before making her way across the room. "I'm going to go and check the kitchen."

"How's she doing?" Ryan asked, once he knew she was out of earshot.

"She's good," Eric nodded, slapping on his gloves.

"Really?"

"Really, Ryan, what do you want me to say?"

Ryan turned towards the kitchen, nodding his head. "Nothing, forget it."

Immediately, Eric felt bad for snapping at him. He'd done nothing but show concern and he'd shot him down. "Look, Ryan, I'm sorry, alright. It's just, really stressful, okay. Sometimes it's good," He nodded, clearing his throat. "sometimes it's really good. But I'll admit," Scratching at his wrist Eric met his eyes. "sometimes it's bad. But she's getting through."

"Alright," Ryan smiled softly. "that's fair enough."

* * *

"Hey, Cal," Eric called, making his way into her lab. It was eerily quiet, but he didn't let that bother him because he knew that she was there. He'd watched her walk in and a part of him knew that this is where she'd come, if something was bothering her. "did you get anything on the bullet?" He questioned, feeling that she could hear him, instead of knowing it. There was silence for a time before slowly, she stepped out of the firing range with one hand pressed to her head and the other to her stomach. Immediately, his face flushed and he dashed towards her, stopping only when her reassuring hand pressed to his chest. "Cal,"

"I'm alright," She breathed. "just a little nausea, it's normal."

"It might be normal, Cal, but it still makes me panic."

Calleigh looked up at him with a grateful smile behind her tired eyes. She'd come back to work and for having her around all day, he was thankful. But she looked drawn and tired and these bouts of nausea were closer together than he would have liked. She looked pale and sometimes, even a little disoriented and when he knew she wasn't looking, he'd find himself alone in one of the cubicles in the bathroom upstairs, slapping the wall with his fist and blaming everything on the God he'd been raised to believe in. He knew that it was irrational and he knew that his mother would shake her finger at him for ever considering, blaming it all on God. But when he thought about it, if anyone deserved the blame, it was him. And he couldn't help but feel that the guy wasn't even man enough to come down and face him. Likely, he reasoned, because he knew what he'd done this time, was unforgivable.

"Hey," He whispered, grasping her elbows and guiding her into his arms until he could wrap them around her shoulders and pull her into his chest. Kissing her forehead, she smiled and closed her eyes, leaning into his touch with a gentle sigh.

"You have no idea how much better that makes me feel." She grinned and Eric chuckled.

"Well then, let me know whenever I can be of service."

Reaching up to wrap her arms around his neck, Calleigh stepped up on her tip-toes to press her lips to his. "Any time?" She questioned.

"Anytime."

"Anywhere?"

"Anywhere." He clarified with a laugh.

"Good," She nodded, dropping her forehead to his chest as she breathed him in. "that's good to know." Clearing her throat, Calleigh stepped away from him and as if she was placing obstacles between them, just for good measure, she stepped behind the desk and her scope. "It's a .38," She stated. "fairly standard unfortunately, but I did manage to match it to a cold case, Philadelphia, three years ago, two murders." She handed him the file and Eric stared at her hand for a moment, noting how it shook, but said nothing.

"Thanks," He smiled, brushing his thumb over her fingers as he took the file. Eric turned to leave the room, making sure to even his breaths, because walking away from her these days, even in the most innocent of circumstances, was the most difficult thing he had to face. He stepped up towards the door, resting his hand on the handle before a choked voice dragged him back with the sound of his name on her lips, strangled in fear.

"What? What is it?" He ran back to her, dropping the file on the bench and grasping her wrist in his hand as she pulled it away from her head.

"I didn't," She sniffed. "I didn't think, I wasn't thinking," She cried, looking up at him with red-rimmed eyes as she held a clump of blond hair in her fingers.

"Oh god," He muttered. Calleigh stood there frozen as Eric dashed around the room, looking for anything, a hat a scarf, anything she could use to feel less lost and exposed. He contemplated his own shirt, but he knew she'd never go for it. Calleigh was known for her style, it was vain for him to think it, but she was and to leave the lab with his shirt wrapped around her head, would be worse than the alternative. Then suddenly, he remembered Valera had arrived at work with a hat on that morning. Conveniently he forgot the dark-rimmed sunglasses that had accompanied it, hiding her hangover and protecting her from a throbbing headache, but that didn't matter right now. "wait here." He whispered, grasping her hips in his broad hands and kissing her forehead before dashing out of the room.

There was nothing Calleigh could do but stand there, staring at the closed door as Eric disappeared. She hadn't expected for it to come this soon, the Doctor had said anywhere from two weeks to a month and he'd even, with a smile, ensured her that in some cases, it didn't even happen at all. She had trouble believing that. She had no doubt that it was true, but she was thinking of her life and the long-running philosophy that surrounded her being that seemed to be permanently set on, whatever can go wrong, will go wrong. But then she gasped and she realised that it really had been two weeks since her first treatment, three since her surgery and it finally hit home for her that she was one of those women she pitied, fighting that proverbial losing battle. It made something inside her crack and she dropped her palms to the counter-top, taking deep breaths regardless of the wheezing sound that followed each one.

In that moment, she realised what she was doing, she realised what Eric had been telling her for weeks. She realised why she'd caught him on so many nights, rested on one elbow and looking down at her with those longing, loving eyes. She ached for him, wanted to apologise to him, for putting him through this. But she stopped herself, stopped herself from thinking that, because there was no way he'd let her take the blame for something that was irrevocably out of her control. Instead, she gripped the thick manila folder in front of her, wanting to feel something tangible in her hands. She moved it on the desk, straightening it and realising that she'd never had the control that she had always thought she had. She'd always been organised, methodical, thorough and stubborn. She'd always battled for what she wanted and more often than not, she'd come off the victor. But in this, she had no control. Her life was in someone else's hands and that made her heart ache like she'd never felt before.

She'd always thought that eventually, her job would kill her. She was fearless, reckless even and being the shot that she was, she was never scared to get right up there in the action. She'd been shot, she'd been caught in a fire and she'd nearly drowned. She'd always thought that her end would come with the feeling of a burning pelet of metal, ripping through her body, she always thought that she'd go down in a fight, like one of those heros in the stories her father used to tell her on the rare nights he was sober enough to recall them. She never thought she'd go like this. Never thought that it would happen to her.

"Here," Eric grinned nervously, dashing through the door and holding out Valera's black cap. "doesn't really suit your blouse, but it's better than nothing, right?" He quipped and she found herself dumbly looking down at the sky blue silk she'd worn that morning. Nodding, she watched him as he tentatively walked across the room and gently placed the cap upon her head, making sure not to squish her ears as he tucked her hair behind them. "Do you want me to drive you home?"

"No," She immediately answered, reflexively feeling that she was just going to go back to work. But upon staring into his eyes for a long moment, she relented and nodded, clutching his arm when another wave of nausea hit her. "Eric," She whispered, stopping them as they made their way slowly towards the door.

"Yeah?" He smiled adoringly, curling his arm around her back to support her.

"I'm not going to lose, am I?"

"Of course not. I've never seen you lose anything," He grinned. "nothing says this has to be different."

* * *

**_When you face the sun, the shadows always fall behind you._**  
~ Helen Keller

* * *

Eric watched her from the doorway, as she walked into their home. One week after her surgery, Eric had officially moved in. His lease was up and so, the majority of his furniture had been put into storage, except for his lazy-boy and the side cabinet that his mother had given him when his Abuela died three years ago. He'd loved it, when he'd shuffled it into her living room and Calleigh's eyes had lit up at the fact such a beautiful heirloom had blended in so well with her own furniture. Now, instead of the house being immaculate, spacious and so clean you could eat off any of the surfaces, it looked so pleasantly lived in that it never ceased to bring a smile to his face when he stepped inside and realised that it was _theirs_.

"Do you want something to eat?" He questioned, tossing his keys on the table in the hall as she continued up the hall in silence, pulling the cap from her head and letting it fall to the floor. It didn't go unnoticed by him, the clump of hair that went with it and with each strand that touched down on the pristine white carpet, his heart broke. She didn't answer his question, just kept walking until she was all the way into the bathroom and with a click, the door separated them.

Calleigh stood in front of the mirror. She studied the lines around her eyes, her deep sallow complexion and the tired, red rims around her eyes. To her, she looked miserable and pale and as she reached up to her hair, she felt tears burn at her eyes when her fingers brushed lightly against the soft blond strands. _'I have to get through this.' _She thought to herself, brushing her fingers from her hairline, back until they rested at the back of her neck. She feared pulling her fingers away, worried that with them would come another harrowing chunk, so she held them there, staring at herself in the mirror and fearing that this was all she'd amount to. Letting her fears pour out of her in silent, undeterred tears.

_"Elizabeth," She smirked, watching as the little girl dashed towards her through the grass in her little pink sundress, crawling across her lap until she was curled into her arms. Burying her lips in the girl's soft curls, Calleigh kissed the top of her head and held her close. "I love you."_

_"I love you too, Mommy." She answered hugging her back through the chenille blanket, getting her tiny fingers caught in the tattered holes lining the edges from overuse. They sat there for as long as Calleigh could hold onto her, reclining back in the sunshine as the waves in the distance crashed against the shore and the birds overhead sang their simple, elegant song. She'd never felt such warmth as she felt in that moment, looking down at the deep brown eyes that were looking straight back up at her through wild curls and a devilish smile. The sun was shining on them and looking out towards the yard, Calleigh felt she had everything in the world when she met the eyes of the shirtless man trying to pry a ball from the little bulldog's mouth._

_"Let her go, Cal," He chuckled. "I need her to mediate the negotiations here." He joked, shaking the ball which only resulted in the dog, swinging from side to side._

_"Papi," The tiny girl sat up, shaking her head. All of two years old and and she was already a clone of her mother. "you have to make her think you don't want it."_

_Calleigh watched as Eric's desperation eased off, his fingers loosened and the dog lost interest, dropping the ball. "We gave birth to a genius." He stated, standing up straight and letting a pretend look of shock, cover his features._

_"Could you really expect anything less?" Calleigh quipped and Eric laughed, throwing the ball across the yard for the dog to chase, before making his way over to them. Leaning down, he kissed her lips, whispered a heartfelt "No" and grabbed Elizabeth under the arms, swinging her in the air as she let out a squeal of delight._

Quickly, Calleigh dropped her hands to the drawer, digging through until she found what she was looking for. She could hear Eric's call from outside the door, filled with concern and fear and a part of her wanted desperately to drop what she was doing, but she pushed it to the back of her mind as she plugged the clippers in and adjusted the setting. She stared at herself again, meeting the eyes of the dark-eyed little girl that blurred her vision and made the decision she barely wanted to accept she'd considered.

Eric called her name again and she knew that he could hear what she was doing through the thin door. He knocked and she could hear the knocks becoming more frantic as she raised the clippers to her forehead. _"Calleigh!" _He called again, but she ignored him, watching the first tendrils fall past her eyes and into the sink. She had to do this, she reasoned, she needed to get past the denial, she needed to get herself into a place where she could stand up and fight right alongside Eric, where she could look up and see what he saw. She couldn't do that whilst she was hoping every day, that this was just going to go away.

Another lock of hair dropped in front of her and she felt a strange sense of release come over her. His knocks became less insistent and she sensed him move away, but not too far. He was waiting, she knew. He was waiting for her and in her heart she knew that he'd wait as long as it took.

* * *

Eric stood with his back pressed to the wall in the hallway. For a while, she'd been silent and he hated to think that he was worried. He heard her shuffle around a few times and thought that perhaps he'd heard her crying, but he couldn't be sure. He dropped his head into his hand, running his fingers across his head as he waited, patiently, for any sign that she was coming out.

When he finally heard the lock click over he straightened up, ran his palms across the front of his pants as he bit his bottom lip. He stared at the handle as it turned, watching it intently as she edged her way out. And if he said that he wasn't shocked by what he saw, he'd have been lying through his teeth.

"Cal," He choked out. "what have you,"

She cut him off. "Acceptance is a stage of this, right?" She questioned with a slight quiver in her voice. Eric's jaw was still hanging open, he knew, but as he adjusted to the idea, he could feel his own hands reaching out for her. Closing the gap between them, Eric's hand came up to her brow and he watched Calleigh's eyes as they followed it. Tentatively, he slid his fingers across her forehead before touching the top of her head where his fingers would have normally run through thick, healthy, beautiful blond locks.

"Yeah," He breathed, taking her into his arms and kissing her temple. "it is."

"I'm alright, Eric." She smiled, craning her head back so she could look into his eyes. "This is easier to deal with, than watching it slowly fall out."

"Yeah, I guess." He bent down and kissed her lips before burying his face in her shoulder so that he could fight the tears that wanted to fall.

* * *

**_True friendship is seen through the heart not through the eyes._  
~ **Unknown

* * *

Alexx quietly pushed at the front door, holding Eric's keys tightly in her hand. She smiled when it swung open and she was greeted by the smiling sunshine beaming through the livingroom. Letting the door close behind her, she hesitated before stepping any further into their home. She'd known about their relationship longer than any of the team, but stepping into the world that they shared, day in and day out, touched her heart in such a way that made it churn to hold them both in her arms, kiss their foreheads and tell them how proud she was of both of them. But they weren't her children, she'd known that for a long time, so she settled for smiling as she set her eyes on Calleigh with her back to her, curled up in a loungechair with a blanket and a large book rested in her lap.

"Hey, honey." She smiled, making her way around to meet the younger woman's eyes with a warm, loving smile.

"Alexx," She blushed, raising a self-conscious hand to her forehead as Alexx sat down on the foot-stool in front of her. "I didn't know you were coming. I would have made something, are you hungry?" Calleigh moved to get up, but Alexx' gentle hand on her knee, stopped her.

"I'm fine," She reached up, holding her hand out until Calleigh took it. "how are you feeling?"

"I'm good," She answered honestly, a fact Alexx recognised in her smiling green eyes. "I'm feeling pretty good today. Looking a little different," She chuckled nervously, brushing her fingers across her bare scalp and drawing Alexx' attention to it momentarily. Dropping her chin to her chest, Calleigh quickly pulled her sweater tighter around herself, covering the small bandage and the IV tube taped to her chest. It didn't go unnoticed by Alexx and even though she looked more rested than she had in weeks and happier than she'd been in days, Alexx couldn't help the way her heart broke for her. "So," Calleigh rasped. "to what do I owe this pleasure?"

"Ah," Alexx paused. "Eric gave me his keys, I hope you don't mind the intrusion."

"No," Calleigh reached for her hands again. "Alexx, you're always welcome here."

With a bright smile, Alexx reached behind to the bag she'd rested on the floor, just beside the coffee table. "Well, considering that, I have something for you." Calleigh watched her intently, as she lifted the bag to her lap and carefully removed a box, laying it on Calleigh's knees before tossing the bag aside. "Eric spoke to me, about how you were feeling," Alexx set her with a warning expression before Calleigh could dispute the secrets Eric had shared with her in confidence. "now, he told me that you've been a little self-conscious about your appearance," A tear escaped Alexx' eye as she smiled, gesturing towards the box that Calleigh wasn't sure she was ready to open. "so, with the help of the team, we've put this together for you. Everyone chipped in," Alexx grinned as Calleigh looked up at her.

"Alexx, I couldn't,"

Alexx stopped her short, gesturing for her to open the box. "They all thought this might help you get back on your feet, because knowing you, we all thought that you might want to get back to work."

Licking her lips, Calleigh studied her eyes for a moment, before hesitantly lifting the lid of the box. Inside, was a sheet of tissue paper that she carefully pulled aside. When she looked down, she gasped and pressed her palm to her chest as a tear came to her eye. "Oh, Alexx, they're beautiful." She whispered, lifting the long, purple silk scarf that rested on top of an assortment of different colours. "These are simply stunning." She smiled, running her fingers across an emerald green one that had a faint, moss-green swirl. "Alexx," Tears sprung to her eyes as she buried her fingers in he pile of scarves, marvelling at the array of colours that burst out of the box, the further she dug. "I can't even,"

"It's alright," Alexx whispered, dropping to her knees in front of Calleigh's chair and taking her friend tightly into her arms. "it's alright, baby, I know." As she wrapped her arms around her friend, Calleigh's tears cascaded down her cheeks with a freedom that hadn't accompanied them before. Lying in bed with Eric, she tried to cover them with her fist, tried to hide her tears from him because she wanted to be strong for him. But he'd only wrapped his arms around her and held her, sharing his strength with her and unwittingly making her feel guilty for keeping it all to herself, because he needed that reassurance that she was feeling everything he was feeling.

But with Alexx, she didn't feel the sorrow. She wept with tears of thankfullness, because she was surrounded by an amazing network of people that were reaching out for her and in that moment, her two man army had suddenly grown in numbers to the point where she could actually feel the fear ebbing away.

TBC.


	4. Chapter 4

_**What children take from us, they give.  
We become people who feel more deeply,  
question more deeply,  
hurt more deeply, and love more deeply.**_  
~ Sonia Taitz

* * *

From the front window of her condo in the heart of Little Havana, Carmen Delko watched with a steaming cup of Cubano in her hands; her son as he closed the door of his car, taking his time to lock it before slowly walking up the front path. She knew that he couldn't see her and with that in mind, she took the time to study him. His shoulders were slumped, his stride was long and his eyes were set on the car keys twirling around his fingers. He looked deep in thought and from the hard truth that he hadn't been home for dinner in well over a month, she could deduce that something was wrong.

Smiling softly, she placed her Cubano down on a coaster before taking her time to reach the door. Knowing her son as she did, she knew that he'd savour the few seconds extra he had to gather his emotions and take a deep, calming breath. He was much like her in that way.

"Eric, mijo, come in." She smiled brightly, opening her arms for him and taking in a deep breath as he fell into them. She pressed her palm to the back of his head as he lent down and buried his face in her shoulder, almost clinging to her. Pushing the door closed behind him, Carmen let him guide their embrace, held on to him as long as he needed to hold on to her before he turned his head, placed a kiss to her cheek and smiled softly before heading towards the kitchen. "Is something bothering you, mijo?"

He answered with an inaudible grunt, rifling through cupboards in the kitchen as she demurely took a seat on the sofa, watching him. She could see that his shoulders were tense, his searching was almost frantic and as she caught a glimpse of his face, she could see the sure signs of tears recently shed. Her heart broke for him. It was a hard moment in life where a mother is forced to watch her son suffering only to know that she would need to wait until he was ready, to offer any form of aid.

"Is it Calleigh?" She questioned in a whisper and when he nodded, his hand still grasping a cabinet above his head, she took a deep shuddering breath. A part of her was afraid to know the truth. She was very fond of Calleigh, always had been. All of her nietos adored the young woman, she was certainly beautiful and she'd never seen Eric so attentive to any of the women that he'd brought home for family dinners. She was also one of the few that had ever returned for more than a second visit. She was sweet and friendly and to her great relief, she was intelligent. Nothing worried her more than the thought of them having a falling-out. "Did the two of you have a fight?"

Eric chuckled sardonically and Carmen pursed her lips in confusion. She'd never seen him like this. He'd been distant before, he'd hidden from the things that had frightened him, especially when he was a little boy. He'd had break-ups in the past, and Marisol's death had been such an agonizing blow to them all, that his emotions had been out there with the rest of them. But nothing seemed to have effected him this deeply and quietly before. Nothing to the point where she couldn't barely tell what he was feeling.

Carmen's hands started to sweat as she anxiously awaited some kind of sign from him, that he wasn't completely breaking down. And she was surprised, when she heard his voice crack from across the room. "Somehow I think that might have been easier than this."

Carmen could feel her heart start beating into her throat as the fear set in. She started putting the pieces together. Calleigh worked with Eric and their jobs were dangerous, sometimes far too dangerous than the dreams she'd had for her baby boy when he was wandering around in diapers and throwing clumps of dirt at his big sisters in the back garden. She felt suddenly nauseas and as he turned around to face her, she lent back into the cushions of the couch with her hand pressed to her chest. Fearing the worst.

"Is Papi home?" He questioned quietly, stepping into the living room and taking a seat on the coffee table, right in front of her.

Her eyes didn't leave his face. "No, he's playing golf with your Tio. Eric, what's going on. Has something happened to Calleigh?"

Eric tried to open his mouth to speak, but his mother's small hands curling around his, holding them together like she used to when he'd had a nightmare, made him crack. A flood of tears burst forth from him and he sobbed, dropping his chin to his chest as she clutched his hands tighter with one hand and raised the other to the side of his head.

"Mijo, talk to me." If she was honest with herself, he was frightening her beyond belief.

"She has cancer, Mom." He quickly let it out. Dropping his face into her lap, Carmen lent forward, wrapping her arms around him as he cried against her. The force with which he shook, made her wonder if he was going to shake right out of his skin. She could feel the warmth of his tears on her blouse and with a harsh swallow, she could feel the warmth of her own in the corner of her eyes.

"Oh, mijo." She cried, knowing that Eric had come here to let the pain flow. He was a strong willed man, she'd raised him to be so. When his sister's had been hurt, he'd always sat by their sides, assured them they were going to be alright and he'd always been far more mature for his years when it came to making other people feel better. He wouldn't be her Eric if he wasn't putting all his energy into being the pillar of strength for Calleigh and she smiled slightly at the knowledge that he had become the man she'd always dreamt he'd be. He was sometimes just a little harder to find than she'd expected.

"She's so strong, Mami," He whispered, keeping his arms wrapped around her and remembering faintly how it used to calm him so completely when he was a child. "she's so quiet about it and she's so brave. But she cries at night, I hear her."

"And what do you do?" Carmen lent back, urging him to look up at her and he did, meeting her eyes with his watery brown orbs.

"I," He sniffed. "I hold her. But Mami, sometimes she cries so much that I don't know what to do. Sometimes it's so bad that I don't think anything I _can_ do will help."

"It helps," She whispered, running her hands down the sides of his face and brushing away his tears with her thumbs. "Eric, you _love_ her, I've seen it. Your Papi has seen it and my heavens, your sisters do not stop talking about it," She chuckled and he smiled through his tears. "the best thing you can do for her is what you're doing. Be strong, be brave," She lent forward and kissed his forehead. "hold her when she sleeps and come to my arms to cry. She doesn't need to see that you're afraid."

"There's just so much that I wanted for us, you know?" He sat up, wiping at his tears and she nodded. "We've been together ten months, Mom. For me, that's a lifetime and I don't want to see an end coming any time soon."

"You've loved her for years, I know that, Eric." She smirked and Eric caught her eye, refusing to acknowledge the mischevious glint therein.

"It's not just that, Mami." He stood up, scrubbing his hands over his face as he started to pace. "she's had this for nearly three months now. I know some people have it for years and they try and they try and it never goes away, but I'm scared Mami, I'm really scared and I've never felt that before. Not when it wasn't my life at stake."

"But it _is_ your life, Eric." She stated simply, looking up at him with pride in her eyes. He looked down at her then, seeing her in a new light, seeing what she'd said, from a different angle. She was right. Eric turned away, he faced the window and he brought his hand up to his face. She was right. Calleigh was his life. He wanted everything in his life to involve her and he wanted to share, every accomplishment, every small feat, every triumph, loss and confusion with her. He wanted to love her, fight with her and hear her laugh when he burnt their dinner. He wanted children with her eyes and he wanted her to feel like the most treasured woman in the world.

Spinning around, Eric met her eyes and Carmen edged back a little when his determined stare was set upon her, as something inside of him, snapped open. "I want to marry her." He stated suddenly and Carmen's breath caught in her throat. Where that revelation had originated from, she wasn't sure.

"Mijo,"

He cut her off. "I just realised it but I think I've known it for a long time," He breathed as he lowered his voice, letting the reality of what he'd discovered, truely set in. "I want to marry her, Mami." His determination grew in intensity and Carmen found herself smiling uncontrollably. She'd never known her son to be so passionate about a woman before and she would admit to having had fears in the past that he'd never, truely, settle down. But she'd be remiss to say that this sudden revelation didn't make her interally jump for joy. Calleigh was certainly different to the rest of the family, with her Southern American accent and her crystal green eyes. Her blond hair always stood out at their family gatherings but her manner, her kindness and her sunshine, blended in with them as though she belonged. And to Carmen, she did belong. Anyone who could make her boy smile so widely, laugh so whole-heartedly and love so deeply, deserved a seat at her table.

She only wished he wasn't potentially setting himself up for the greatest heartache of his life.

* * *

_**Carry on, keep romancing  
Carry on, Carry on dancing.**_  
~ Savage Garden

* * *

Resting with his back against the doorframe and his arms crossed over his chest, Frank watched her intently. She moved gracefully across the lab, slipping a bullet into the scope before pulling a Baretta apart and inspecting the barrel. She had an assortment of different case files laid out carefully on her work bench, each one open at a different point of completion. The way she worked was a little chaotic to him - even if it did look organised, she was all over the place. She'd been back at work for a few days and the first time he saw her, he had to be honest, he had stared. She'd arrived wearing her regular black pants suit, those frighteningly high heels that made her look taller, even though they all knew it was an illusion. She had an orange blouse on underneath her jacket and admittedly, what he'd stared at was the long, silk, orange scarf that she had artfully wrapped around her head, tied at the side and hanging stylishly over one shoulder.

Right now, her attire was much the same, but instead of the orange, her blouse was pink underneath her lab coat and her scarf was the one he had chosen, the one he'd thought suited her when Alexx had shown them all the catalogue and asked each of them to choose one. It was a light pink that would have looked white, if it weren't right beside her pale skin.

"I hate to say it, Frank," She smirked, he could hear it in her voice. Frank smiled, watching her continue to work as she spoke. "it's fairly common knowledge that Eric could take you in a fight. So I would recommend against the staring." She looked up at him through her lashes. "Just in case you'd like to avoid losing something dear to you."

Frank chuckled. "Yeah, I'd say that's about right."

"So, Detective Tripp, what can I do for you?" She rested her gloved hands on the benchtop and looked straight up at him.

"Ah," He cleared his throat, looking down at the file he'd forgotten he was holding in his hand. "Horatio said you had the results on the gun."

"I do," She nodded, stepping around the bench and searching through her pile of files until she came upon the one that he'd asked for. Holding it out for him, she blushed slightly under his scrutiny, wondering what it was that had everyone staring lately. To her, she looked worse than she'd ever looked and certainly felt it, she wore scarves in the place of her characteristically long, blond hair and her complexion was pale and tired. She'd lost weight already, because the nausea that came after every round of Chemo had been worse than the Doctor had anticipated, but fortunately, not to the point where it was considered something they needed to worry about. "what?" She finally asked and Frank shrugged, causing her to furrow her brow in confusion.

"You just," He took a step back, suddenly feeling a little too close. "you really look amazing, Calleigh."

To say she wasn't rather surprised would be lying. "Um," She darted her eyes across the room, self-conciously brushing her fingers across the back of her neck as she stepped back around the bench. "thank you." She answered quietly, swallowing as she looked back up at him.

"It's just," He paused, meeting her eyes. "it's great to see you back here, Calleigh. When you're not here, we're all a little," He stopped short and Calleigh nodded, trying to hide the emotion behind her eyes at the idea that her friends were hurting when she wasn't around. Looking at it from their end, she frowned, knowing that if it were any of them in her situation, any day that she didn't see them she'd be going out of her mind with worry.

"I'm sorry," She whispered. "I don't mean to cause anyone pain."

Frank shook his head quickly. "It's not your fault, Calleigh. It's just," He stopped himself, looking into her eyes as he thought on the best way to come about the subject. Though, with disappointment, he realised that nothng he said was going to eleviate the guilt she had no reason to feel, so instead he smiled, nodding and tapping the file on the doorframe before turning to leave. "it's not your fault." He repeated, finally turning and leaving all together.

* * *

"Eric!" Natalia called down the hall, catching Eric's attention as he stepped out of Fingerprints. He turned in his spot, watching her jog towards him with a smile on her face.

"Hey, Nat, what's up?" He stopped in the centre of the hall and faced her.

"I was wondering, a group of us are going out for a few drinks tonight. We just wanted to know if you and Calleigh wanted to come along?" She waved her hands about nervously. "Nothing too rowdy, but it's alright if you don't want to, I just thought it'd be nice if we could all do something with Calleigh, she's been so distant these last couple of months and," She chuckled softly. "you know."

Eric nibbled on his bottom lip, casting his eyes down the hall as he considered the invitation. After meeting with his mother the previous week, Eric had spent a lot of time thinking about the revelation he'd shared. He'd arrived home that night, later than he'd hoped and she'd already been asleep, resting fitfully with her arms wrapped tightly around his pillow on the couch. He'd immediately felt guilty, knowing that she had been waiting up for him when the both of them knew that she should have been in bed. He couldn't blame her for it though, considering he had just as much trouble sleeping without her as he was sure she did when he wasn't there.

"Ah," He stuttered. "actually I really wanted to speak to Calleigh tonight." It had taken the better part of the week to work up the courage, carrying the small velvet box around in his pocket with him wherever he went. Touching it, whenever she'd walk into a room and smile at him or when they'd found a young woman, washed up on the shore with three gunshot wounds in her chest and no money in her purse. It had grounded him, for the past week. It had made him feel as though the future was attainable and reminded him that nothing could be taken for granted.

Natalia opened her mouth to answer, but was cut short by Calleigh's voice. "Hey guys, what's going on?" She questioned, stepping up beside Eric, smiling up at him as he subtly pressed his palm to the small of her back.

"Well, Cal," He ran his hand in small circles, glancing between the two women. "Natalia wanted to know if we wanted to go out for a few drinks tonight, but,"

Calleigh's face lit up before he could continue and she smiled widely at Natalia. "Oh, that sounds lovely. We'd love to go!"

Natalia's eyes opened wide and she looked up to Eric who faltered. "Eric?" She questioned, causing Calleigh to look up to him too, leaning herself into his side. His courage all but dissolved when he met her excited eyes and with the two of them standing there, he couldn't even reach into his pocket for the box - his lifeline - without being caught red-handed.

He swallowed. "Are you sure you feel up to it, Cal?"

Natalia furrowed her brow, wondering why he was avoiding telling her that he'd already declined. On the one hand, she wanted to smile because it was becoming clear that he'd do anything Calleigh wanted just to make her happy. But she couldn't help the nagging feeling that he'd had specific intentions that were now falling by the wayside because it was easier than going through with it.

It made her curious, that was for certain.

"Sure," Calleigh beamed. "I mean, I certainly won't drink much because I'm really tired and the nausea is a bit of a constant, but I really want to see everyone, please, Eric?" She looked up at him with hopeful eyes and Eric couldn't find it in his heart to refuse her. There was so much he wanted to give her, so much she didn't even ask for and to deny her this, he felt he'd be betraying himself in some way. "We don't have to stay long, right Natalia?" She turned to the other woman, who found herself simply nodding her head.

"Yeah, sure, we can go for a while." He nodded his head, leaning down to press his lips to hers chastely before she patted Natalia's arm and left them alone, walking into firearms with her face buried in a file, deep in concentration. "There's no saying she'll still be up to it this afternoon, but for now I suppose we're going." He shrugged, meeting Natalia's eye. "I'll talk to you later, Nat." He turned, making his way down the hall before Natalia quickly followed him, stopping him with a hand at his elbow.

"Eric, what's going on?"

"What do you mean?" He smiled, pretending as though nothing was bothering him. When clearly, to her, something was. He just knew that he couldn't tell her, no matter how hard she prodded.

"Come on, Eric," She shook her head. "you just got finished telling me you had other plans, then Calleigh gets all excited and you flip your decision."

Eric shrugged. "She wants to go."

"Yeah but, Eric, if you have other plans,"

He shook his head. "No, seriously Natalia, it's fine. She wants to go, we can go."

"I didn't mean to disrupt any plans that you had."

"You didn't," He smiled genuinely. "it's nothing we can't do another day. I'll see you later."

And before she could protest again and try and get the truth out of him, Eric had headed into the elevator and she watched from the middle of the hall as the doors closed him inside.

* * *

**_"It is not so much our friends' help that helps us  
as the confident knowledge that they _will_ help us."_**  
_~ Epicurus (341 - 270 BC)_

* * *

Calleigh smiled tiredly as Eric opened the car door for her. He held his hand out to her, waiting for her to take it before he guided her out. She lent against him, letting his arm drape across her shoulders as he locked up her Crossfire and turned her around towards the bar. Thankfully, Eric thought as he looked down into Calleigh's tired eyes; Natalia had chosen a place that didn't do too much business on a Wednesday night. Sliding his hand down her shoulder, he tucked his arm under hers to hold her tighter and rested his palm against her hip. Normally, Calleigh would have brushed off the protective embrace in favour of walking on her own, often ahead of him, but at the moment she favoured it and Eric wasn't about to complain.

They made their way inside and with a small smile, he noted silently that Calleigh's arm was wrapped around his waist and her hand was clutching the edge of his shirt tightly in a bunch. Natalia waved them over and as Calleigh lent away from him, letting Natalia hug her briefly, he noticed Ryan immediately jump up from his chair and offer it to her. It made him laugh just slightly, the way the younger man didn't need to be shoved out of his chair anymore, not when it came to Calleigh. The two men shared a look, Ryan knowing that Eric was internally laughing at him, before Ryan made his way to the other end of the table and Eric pulled another chair over and slipped it in between Calleigh and Valera.

He watched her as she greeted everyone, doling out handshakes that were more like clutching lifelines to the people she knew, like Ryan and Valera and genuine yet strained smiles for those of the night-shift she'd met only briefly when she'd worked long into the night or commandeered the Ballistics lab for the duration of a double shift.

They were there for friendly conversation and a few beers after work. Eric knew that everyone wanted to know how she was faring and everyone wanted to know that she was going to be alright. His heart tore at the notion that there was nothing he nor Calleigh could say to them, to ease their concern and he knew that regardless of how Natalia begged them to stay, he wasn't going to make Calleigh sit there for more than an hour, not even if she wanted to. He could already see her eyes drooping and the glass of wine she'd been excited about all afternoon had been replaced at the last minute, by an order for a glass of water with lemon.

She was exhausted and if he studied her features for longer than a moment, she was unable to hide from him, the fact that she'd felt ill for the better part of the day. He'd wanted to take her home straight from work, but he knew that if he didn't do this for her, one part of what she desperately needed to get through this, he would have been taking away from her.

Her friends.

* * *

"Calleigh," He whispered, kissing her forehead when her eyes closed of their own accord and her face dropped into the crook of his arm. She was having a great time and she was smiling brighter than she had in days, but she also sighed and buried her face further into his bicep causing him to smile as he wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "come on, let's head home."

"Natalia, I'm so sorry, I'm such a party pooper." She apologised, reaching for Natalia's hands.

"Hey, it's alright. Go home, get some sleep."

"I'm just so exhausted, I'll be more fun next time, I promise." Calleigh smiled, taking Eric's hand as he reached for hers. They waved their goodbyes, leaving the bar hand in hand as Natalia and Ryan shared a frown of worry. Calleigh was one of the few people the pair of them looked to for strength in their jobs. She was one of the few they often fought to please and to see her so fragile, so delicate and so obviously hurting even though she battled hard with showing it, it settled on them in that moment, that nothing could be taken for granted, especially heroes.

TBC


	5. Chapter 5

Ah, welcome chapter five. So, I've decided, that because they were my inspiration, I'm dedicating two of my original characters, to Ade and Melissa. I'm going to try, as best I can, to depict them in the way I see the real Ade and Melissa, but also giving them their own strengths. I just felt they needed a little dedication, as their beautiful dance still touches me to the core when I watch it. They're amazing.

They will, due to this, be making a few appearances down the track.

**_

* * *

_**

**_From the first breath she breathed  
When she first smiled at me  
I knew the love of a father runs deep  
_**_'I Loved Her First'_ By Heartland

* * *

Duke sat on the edge of his sofa, staring at the blank television screen. The livingroom was littered with junkfood wrappers, old newspapers and one empty bottle of Jack lying upturned on the floor, still smelling of the last drop that had evaporated over a month ago. A few times, he'd moved to pick it up and dispose of it. But it was the last bottle of liquor that resided in his home and regardless of how much he loathed himself for his past actions, how much he hated the years he'd taken away from his little girl by forcing her to grow up and take care of him because he wasn't man enough to do it himself, he couldn't do it. A part of him felt that in some way, he didn't deserve to be rid of it.

He'd done a lot of things in his life that he wasn't proud of. He married too young, his first love and while the first few years had been exciting, travelling together and working through college together, the year Calleigh was born, had been tough. They drifted apart and eventually, he'd found that the mornings he spent playing with his glowing, beautiful little girl, his wife spent sleeping off a hangover and the nights that she spent bathing her and feeding her, he spent drowning his sorrows in the nearest dive. They say that fatherhood tests you, decides how good a man you are and Duke couldn't scrounge up a moment in his life, where he'd proven himself to be a good man. And yet, she'd loved him, unconditionally. She cared for him, helped him and she'd risked her career for the love he seemed to repeatedly throw back in her face like a used hankerchief.

She deserved better. He'd always known that. But he'd always been too weak to fight for her and his apologies had always come too late. Dropping himself back into the plush cushions of the sofa, he cast his eyes up to the ceiling, blinking away tears. Of all the pain he'd caused her, he couldn't fathom why this had to be happening to her. His beautiful, bright little ray of sunshine. His lambchop. His first _real_ love.

The phone started to chirp and Duke turned his head towards it, seeing a small picture frame sitting beside it and finding himself smiling at the way her eyes lit up the world the day she'd opened them. The picture was one of them, several years ago when she still wore her hair in piggy-tails and laughed without reservation. When she wasn't a professional supervisor at the lab at CSI and she had the world at her feet. Only a few centimetres behind it a smaller picture of her wearing a dark business suit and standing with her arm around his shoulders sat nestled between one of her and Wyatt on a waterslide when he was ten and she was twelve, and the first photo they'd taken at the hospital when she'd looked up at him.

The phone stopped for a few seconds, long enough for him to wipe away a stray tear before it started ringing again. So he reached over and lifted the reciever, bringing it to his ear and in a sudden moment of discomfort, he hoped it wasn't Eric. Eric's most recent calls had harboured bad news and he didn't want to consider the young man to be bad luck, when all he seemed to do was dote on Calleigh the way Duke had never known how to do.

"Hello," He answered, resting his palm to his forehead as he waited for an answer.

"Hey, Dad." Came the familiar greeting and Duke released a sigh of relief. At least if it wasn't Eric, Calleigh had made her way through another day, no worse for wear.

"Hey, Boy," He replied, shaking his head at how condescending the endearment always seemed to sound. Even if it was, Wyatt never seemed to take it that way and the young man simply chuckled, smirking down the phone, even though his father couldn't see it.

"So, you wanted me to call?"

Duke wanted to slap himself. He'd left a message on his son's machine almost a month ago and it hadn't come to him until that very moment, that it had taken him so long to reply. Amidst following Calleigh to her chemotherapy treatments when Eric wasn't able to get off work and helping Eric with the grocery shopping when Calleigh was too ill or too exhausted to go with him, he'd completely let it slip his mind. Not that he'd honestly felt Eric needed the help with groceries. Such small things were mere trifles the young man could handle on his own, but Duke had wanted to feel like he was doing everything he could to help, knowing that Eric had always felt a burning dislike for not him as Calleigh's father, but the life he'd thrust upon her through detachment, fear and selfish ideas.

"Dad?" Wyatt pressed and Duke blinked a few times to clear his head.

"Oh, right, yeah," He cleared his throat. "look, it's about your sister."

"What, what's happened?" Wyatt's panic immediately set in and Duke wished he didn't have to be the one to share the news. A part of him knew that he deserved it, deserved to carry the burden, any burden, for the first time in their lives and so he pushed on, turning his eyes away from the pictures on the side table as if looking away from them would give him strength and eleviate his guilt.

"She's okay right now, but Wyatt, your sister has cancer."

There was silence on the line and if it weren't for the lack of dial-tone, Duke would have assumed he'd hung up on him. He could hear him breathing on the other end and in a way, he was grateful for that because at least then he knew he hadn't passed out or dropped the phone.

"What?" His voice cracked and Duke bit his lip.

"It's been about three months. She's had surgery to remove the tumor and she's undergoing a course of chemotherapy." Even to his own ears, Duke's voice sounded almost clinical and detached, but he knew that if he threw too much emotion behind it, he'd never be able to explain it all.

"This is crazy, Dad." He whispered and Duke knew he'd be pacing. Characteristically, when Wyatt Duquesne couldn't comprehend something, he paced. When things were too emotional, he paced. When his daughter was born, he'd paced up and down the waiting room for three hours until Calleigh had finally managed to convince him that he needed to be in the delivery room with Melissa, not for himself but for her.

"Yeah," Duke agreed with a heavy heart. "yeah, it's crazy. But you know what, she's doing good. Her boyfriend Eric," Duke blinked, wondering if his son would know the man. "do you know, Eric?"

"No, I don't think she's ever mentioned him."

"Well, he works with her at the lab. He's a nice young man, really cares for your sister. He's been doing a lot for her."

"Sounds like a great guy." He muttered and Duke knew there was a level of something there. It wouldn't have been distaste, because as far as Wyatt was concerned, his sister could do no wrong. Perhaps disappointment, that he was only hearing of this now and this man he'd never met, could be beside her every day, hold her hand, kiss her forehead and promise her she'd get through. That had always been his job. Even though he'd been the youngest, he was the proportionately larger of the two Duquense children and he'd always protected his little big sister from any harm that had come her way. But then she'd moved from Louisiana to Miami and playing at protective over the phone just wasn't as imposing as his six-foot stature.

"Yeah, look son, Calleigh wanted you to know but she wanted me to tell you that you don't have to rush down here. She's determined not to go anywhere yet and I'm not exaclty inclined to disagree with her."

There was a chuckle at Wyatt's end of the line. "Trust Calleigh not to do anything without a fight." He jested and Duke found himself laughing because that trait in Calleigh was something she'd gotten from her Grandmother, his mother, a woman who never took no for an answer when you were so full of fried chicken you were ready to burst. They'd always known it, even when Calleigh was small, because simply getting her to do anything that she didn't want to do, had been a chore.

"Yes, well, that's certainly true."

Duke's conversation with Wyatt dragged on slowly, as most conversations between them often went. Slow and painful, like pulling teeth. He filled him in on everything he knew about Calleigh's condition, everything that he understood regardless that there was very little that he did understand about what his little girl was going through. Even less about why. When he finally set the phone down with the knowledge that some time soon, his son was going to call his daughter and find out for himself, how she was doing, Duke looked over at the clock. It was near to midnight and he couldn't help but wonder if she was sleeping peacefully or not. As a child, she'd always slept deeply and soundly but she'd never had to cope with worries like these, back then.

* * *

_**"Never take a person's dignity;  
It means everything to them and nothing to you."  
**_~ Frank Barron

* * *

With a deep sigh, Eric stepped out through the front doors and into the mid-morning Miami sunshine. He'd been on a call-out all morning, leaving Calleigh sleeping before the sun had come up, so he hadn't been around for her, at the time of the day her nausea and dizziness seemed to be at it's worst. She'd repeatedly insisted that she was fine, she could cope and that with time and enough deep breaths, she'd come out of it and manage to get herself ready for the day. He was forever grateful to Horatio, for allowing her sometimes late mornings without even a whisper of disapproval, and to take her profuse apologies with a soft smile and the promise that she'd never let it happen again.

He could see the back of her head, she was sitting a fair way down the path, in the one bench that faced the water with her canary yellow scarf blowing gently in the breeze.

A couple of years ago, when they had shared every secret, but not necessarily every-_thing, _Eric would have been hesitant to approach her. But her shoulders were relaxed, somewhat, and from the way her arms were wrapped around her, he could see that she was trying hard to process something within herself, that wasn't the easiest to process. He'd have been afraid of that in the past, before he'd been granted a free pass into her emotions that allowed him ease of access and permission to press even when she thought she didn't want to be pressed.

Making his way around the bench, Eric waved a hand in front of her gently, letting her know that he was there before standing and casting a shadow across the bench, just to the left of her until she gestured with a tilt of her head, that he could sit beside her.

She looked up at him briefly, blinking her long lashes and he couldn't help but marvel at how big and bold her sparkling green eyes were. He'd always known that her eyes were beautiful, they were one her main physical attributes that he found the most beautiful. But with the sun shining brightly on her face and the soft yellow of her silk scarf against her pale pink skin, they just looked so much wider, so much brighter.

"I heard you had a little issue this morning?" He questioned softly, noting how she hugged herself tighter and cast her eyes down, almost in shame.

"Horatio tell you that?" She asked bitterly and Eric looked out over the calm ocean, squinting in the sunlight though refusing to pull his sunglasses from his pocket. He didn't want to cover his eyes. He never wanted to cover his eyes, when he was talking to Calleigh, because with her everything needed to be open and honest and clear.

"He expressed a concern, Cal, he's not disappointed in you."

"I am," She frowned and with the look on her face, Eric wanted nothing more than to wrap her in his arms and kiss the pain away. She looked confused and lost and as much as he hated to admit it, she looked just like a child, shivering even though the sun was warm and worrying her bottom lip.

"Well, you shouldn't be." He reached up, brushing his thumb along her brow until she pulled away, slipping herself along the bench until she was out of his reach. Eric's hand fell limply against the bench and with his nails, he scratched at the painted wood to distract him from the hurt her distance conjured in him. "You wanna tell me what happened?"

"Not particularly," She answered immediately before glancing up at him and regretting how her reaction had sounded. She shouldn't have been taking it out on Eric and she knew that. He just seemed to be the easiest target because she was hurting, he was there and when she thought about it, this unconditional bond they seemed to have, was her main source of strength because it was the strongest long term connection she'd ever felt with a person, even counting family. "I'm sorry," She breathed and with a faint smile, he accepted her apology without hesitation. "I just, I don't know what came over me, with Horatio, I mean."

"Then why don't you tell me about it?" He smiled sweetly, offering his hand to her and letting it hang in mid air between them before she tentatively reached out and pressed her fingers to his, as if testing the waters before curling her hand into his and letting him pull her back into his side.

"I just," She rested her hand against his thigh for support. "I snapped at him and I feel so horrible."

_Making her way quickly through the lab with her heels clacking sharply against the hard tile floor, Calleigh spun around at the sound of her name, coming to a stop and flicking the length of her scarf back over her shoulder so that she could play with it between her fingers as she smiled up at Horatio. He stepped up to her, holding a file out and with a sense of sudden trepidation, Calleigh swallowed._

_"I was wondering if you could do a favour for me, Ma'am." He held the file up and with a frown, noticed Calleigh's hands stay resolutely where they were._

_"What would that be?"_

_"Ah," Horatio was trying not to notice how her voice had shaken. "Miss Boa Vista is unavaliable at the moment and I was wondering if you could double-check these DNA results for me."_

_"Oh," Calleigh took an involuntary and barely noticable step back. "actually, Horatio, I have a lot of cases that I'm working on right now. My lab is overflowing and I really need to get back there." Turning on her heel, she attempted to make a hasty retreat, hiding her flushed cheeks from his inquisitive eyes, but Horatio Caine was not easily fooled. Calleigh had never refused a favour requested in earnest, especially when it was important to a case. That was when he immediately knew that something was amiss._

_"Calleigh," He called after her, now more out of concern than wanting her favour._

_"I said, I can't!" She snapped, louder than she'd intended, causing all eyes around them to be immediately on them, before her cheeks flushed a brighter red and she dashed off to hide in her lab. Something he'd rarely seen her do._

"I couldn't remember how." She whispered, gripping Eric's thigh tighter and Eric didn't even complain about her nails digging in through the fabric of his dress-pants.

"You couldn't remember how to run the DNA?"

She shook her head. "He asked and I," She shuddered. "I panicked."

"It's alright, Cal, everyone forgets things from time to time."

"No, Eric, this doesn't happen to me. My job," She shook her head. "it's too important to me, it wasn't that it just eluded me for a moment. Right now, I have no idea how to run a DNA test, it's just, it's not there." Wrapping his arm tightly around her shoulders, Eric pulled her further into his side, pressing a kiss to her temple because exactly what to say to ease her anguish, had temporarily eluded him.

"The Doctor said this was possible, right?" He prodded gently and Calleigh nodded, closing her eyes and breathing in the scent of him mixed with the salty ocean air, trying to calm her nerves.

"Yeah, But I never thought," She hesitated. "I never thought it'd effect my work like this. Of all the symptoms this treatment could give me, Eric, this is the last one that I wanted." If it were anyone but Calleigh, Eric would have refuted that statement. But the idea of losing control of her thoughts, for her, was more troubling than the vomiting or the nausea or the possible pain, numbness or even the hair loss. She was losing control of her life, if she lost control of her thoughts and Eric didn't like the idea of that.

"There are things we can do, to help that, you know." He smiled when she tilted her head back so she could look into his eyes, letting her lips form a lazy smile as he wrapped his arm tighter around her, pulling her further into his side. She never stopped noticing how he referred to everything about her battle as a project of 'we' instead of 'you'. Even from her first day of treatment, when the nurse had been setting up her IV and Eric was sitting on the other side of the bed, holding her hand and kissing her fingers and distracting her from the slight sharp pain of the injection, everything was about 'we' and how _'we'_ were going to be fine. If she were cynical, or bitter, she'd have snapped at him for assuming he could even comprehend what she was going through, but she wasn't and she was grateful, because she didn't feel so alone when he was there.

"Like what?" She questioned and Eric chuckled.

"Well, we could read together or do those rubix things. Or, I could get you one of those Nintendo things that has all those puzzles to keep your brain doing what it's supposed to do." Calleigh chuckled, because for all his expertise and experience with new technology in the lab, Eric's approach to non-job related technology was about as advanced as her father's, who still referred to her email as a 'number' as if it were a phone and thought cookies were only something you ate.

"Hm, sounds interesting." He nodded and kissed her temple. "I suppose I should go and apologise to Horatio." She moved to leave, but Eric pulled her back down, pinning her to him.

"There's no need, Cal, he's not angry. Just stay here for the rest of your break, please?" When she relaxed back against him, he was grateful. But he knew that as soon as he released her, she was going to run straight to Horatio and apologise, possibly even request that her own work be monitored and he didn't know how he felt about that. Calleigh was one of the most highly respected criminalists in the lab. Everyone, except Horatio, was junior to her and because he wasn't going to be able to offer his own services to monitor her work, he didn't know how much of a blow this was going to be to her already battered dignity. He just didn't like the idea of a less experienced CSI watching her every move, it was an insult and perhaps even more frustrating because as his own anger boiled over the theoretical possibility, he knew Calleigh would shoulder it with grace, as she did everything else.

_**

* * *

**_

_**Let your arms enfold us  
Through the dark of night  
Will your angels hold us  
Till we see the light  
~** Prayer,_ Secret Garden

* * *

Sitting perched on a stool in the kitchen, Calleigh brushed the same pile of flour around with her fingers as the rest of the women tottered around the kitchen, cooking up all sorts of treats and delicious Cuban delights that normally would have had her drooling and begging to help, in the faint hope that they'd cook faster so that she could dig into them the minute they were out of the oven. But instead, she was lost in her own thoughts, pushing a pile of flour around with her finger and not even noticing whenever Carmen threw her a worried glance.

They'd arrived at the Delko family home for the weekly barbeque and whilst Calleigh had noticed a larger number of Eric's family filling the yard than there had been on previous occasions, she said nothing about it when she was pulled into Carmen's loving arms, tucked under her shoulder, close to her body and guided into the room like the most honored guest. Little did she know that she was. Little did she know that Carmen had invited every single member of the Delko family that knew her, that had met her and even a few that hadn't. Eric had smiled, watching his family drag her into their home and surround her like a great protective wall. He'd known them to do that all his life and while he knew Calleigh wasn't yet a part of the family, he couldn't help but love that they were treating her as though she was. And it warmed his heart as he dropped his hand into his pocket and gently brushed his fingers over soft black velvet.

Quickly, he'd yanked his hand back out when his father had patted him on the back and dragged him out into the yard with his _Tios_ and his cousins, dropped a beer into his hand and continued with their conversation as though the great orchestral welcome had been simple and insignificant.

"Is something the matter, _Mija_?" Carmen asked, resting her elbows on the kitchen counter and looking across into Calleigh's green eyes as she lifted her head.

"Oh, no," Calleigh smiled brightly, reaching over to squeeze Carmen's hand lovingly. "no, everything is lovely. I'm just a little sore, a little tired. It comes and goes." She smiled wanly and Carmen nodded, hoping that the pain that coursed through her at Calleigh's words hadn't shown on her face. Out of the corner of her eye, she noticed Ana and Maria grab each other's hand and she realised that her daughters were, like she was, marvelling at how this beautiful young woman could be so strong, so brave and so nochalant about the whole thing, when each of them knew even she was aching inside.

"Well, why don't you go and sit with Eric, we can handle it in here." She patted her hand but Calleigh shook her head quickly.

"No, no, I want to help." She moved to stand but Carmen insisted that she sit back down.

"Very well, dear, but how about you handle these," She passed over a bowl of beans that needed to be topped and tailed. Normally, Calleigh would have resisted the tiny job that one of the older children had normally been given and insisted on helping in a greater way, but a lot had changed since she'd first set foot in their home and made a mark on their family. Now she simply smiled, taking the bowl with a gracious acceptance and made herself more comfortable on the stool as she began her task.

"Hey," Calleigh smiled up at Maria as Eric's voice whispered in her ear and his arms wrapped around her from behind. Leaning into him, she let him brush his nose along the edge of the multicoloured scarf on her head, looking down at his hand as he felt it between his fingers whilst pressing his other hand to her stomach. "how you doing in here?" He grinned against her ear, placing a gentle kiss to her temple.

"Great," She answered with a genuine smile in her tone as she slipped her fingers in between his, feeling the warmth of his hand radiating through her stomach and his heart beating against her back. "did you get bored out there with the boys?" She quipped and Eric chuckled, stealing a bean and popping it into his mouth.

"No, Dad and Ade are fighting over who can eat the most chilli before they need a glass of milk, so I thought I'd take a break before all hell broke lose." Craning her neck around him, Calleigh cast her eyes out to the back yard where his father's cheeks were beet-red and he was fanning his face with his hand while his younger cousin, Ade, had his tongue hanging out and his arms raised in victory. Calleigh probably knew Ade better than she'd known Eric's sisters for the longest time because he'd always managed to be there when she and Speedle had spontaneously arrived at Eric's door with a six pack of beer, a pizza and a movie she'd had no say in choosing.

"Oh," She laughed. "They're going to make themselves sick."

"Yes, well," He wrapped his arms tighter around her. "if they want to be stupid, I say let them be." He laughed, ignoring his mother's playful glare of displeasure. "So, you're feeling okay?" He questioned softly in a tone he hoped his mother and sister's couldn't hear. But it was a small kitchen and if anyone could hear a pin hit the bottom of the ocean, providing it was hot gossip, it was Ana, Maria and Carmen Delko.

"Yeah," She breathed, leaning back so that she could meet his eyes. "I'm good."

"You're sure?"

"Yeah," Calleigh kissed his lips chastely, being careful not to take it too far in front of his mother, even though she was sure it didn't bother him in the slightest. "Go on, have fun out there."

"You don't want me to stay in here with you?"

"No." She laughed as he placed a row of kisses along her cheek from her earlobe to the corner of her mouth.

"Well that's not very nice." He pouted and Calleigh reached up to rest her palm against his cheek and she simply shrugged with a smirk on her lips. Eric studied her eyes, moving in to kiss her again before running his eyes along her scarf, letting his fingers trace the edge of it again as he smiled. "You know, I really like this one," He grinned as he held the multicoloured fabric in his fingers against her black baby-tee. "makes me think of a rainbow."

Calleigh sighed with a smile, just watching him until he lifted his eyes back up and placed a kiss to her nose. "Love you." He whispered, before dropping the scarf and stepping away from her, heading back towards the yard and only releasing her hand when it became apparent that his arm would stretch no further.

"I said nothing." Maria defended immediately when Calleigh looked up at her, catching her red-handed, staring at her through her long, dark lashes. Calleigh laughed gently, throwing a bean at the older woman and hitting her square in the chest with a playful frown when she winked at her.

TBC


	6. Chapter 6

I just, want to send a little shout out and a thank you to '**Mrs. Duquesne Delko'**, because you pointed me towards this great song, _Never Gonna Be Alone_.

**_

* * *

_**

**_If you ever feel like letting go, I won't let you fall  
You're never gonna be alone, I'll hold you 'til the hurt is gone  
And now, as long as I can, I'm holding on with both hands.  
_**~ _Never Gonna Be Alone, _Nickelback

* * *

Stumbling up the gravel path, Calleigh began to regret not grabbing any shoes when she'd run out of the house. She hugged Eric's jacket tightly around her body, shielding herself from the cool night air because all she had on underneath the jacket, was a pair of boy-leg panties and a very lose, silk camisole. Her legs were still bare to mid thigh, but it was better than nothing. In tears and a mad dash, she'd left him standing alone in the centre of the living-room, surrounded by candles and flowers and the sweet smell of vanilla. The sound of instrumental music was still waltzing through the air when she'd closed the door with an unintentional slam and disappeared into the night.

She hadn't known where else to go and in her hysteria, couldn't think of anyone else to ease her fears than him. But she couldn't go back to him, not until she understood what she was feeling. She kicked her toe on the stoop, ignoring the sharp pain it sent through her foot as she bit her lip and rang the bell. After a moment, she heard footsteps and then the sound of the door being unlocked before she was greeted by the smiling face of Jamie. "Mom! Calleigh's here!" The girl called, and she winced at the high-pitched voice. Jamie stood staring at her for a moment, only then realising her attire before she frowned. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," Calleigh tried a smile, wishing Alexx could get to the door just that little bit faster to save her breaking down in front of the girl. "I just need to speak to your Mom."

"Um," Jamie stammered. "come in." Guiding the shaking woman through the front door, Jamie was beyond grateful when her mother stepped out of the kitchen and dashed towards them, wrapping Calleigh in her arms and pushing her aside.

"Calleigh, what happened?" Alexx questioned, guiding her to the sofa and sitting her down. Calleigh shivered and grabbing the blanket off the back of the sofa, Alexx wrapped it around her friend, rubbing her upper arms to warm her up.

"I don't know," She stammered. "I just, I couldn't handle it and I didn't know how to," She stopped herself, shaking her head and burying her face in her friend's shoulder.

"Jamie, go get me my black sweats, honey and tell your Dad I'm in here, I'm going to talk to Calleigh alone, okay."

"Okay, Mom." Jamie dashed off to her mother's room and Calleigh lifted her head up for a moment, meeting her friend's eyes. Alexx moved to take Calleigh's coat off, but without even knowing completely why, Calleigh fought to keep it. A part of her didn't want to relinquish the smell of him and that gave her comfort, at least for the moment. She watched as Jamie came back with a pair of sweats and handed them to her mom before she disappeared again and closed the door behind her.

"Now, baby, are you going to tell me what happened?" She asked gently, handing Calleigh the sweats with a smile.

The younger woman took them and stood, slipping them on and using the moment as an excuse to keep silent. With the over-sized jacket pulled snuggly around her and the long sweats hanging over her feet - because Calleigh's legs were so much shorter than Alexx'- Calleigh looked so small and vulnerable. Alexx had never seen her like this. They sat in silence for a few moments with Alexx watching Calleigh's face as she stared at a patch on the floor. She took a few deep, calming breaths and when she finally felt that she could meet her friend's eye without breaking into tears, she looked up at her.

"He," She hesitated.

"Honey, what's happened?" Alexx pressed her hand to the side of Calleigh's head, feeling the soft silk of her lilac scarf against her fingers. Calleigh really didn't know how to say it, she'd been so stunned at the time and her first reaction hadn't been what she'd ever expected. But to her, things were screwed up and she couldn't see how it would fix anything. She wanted it more than anything in the world, but the idea of him pitying her, broke her heart so much that it physically hurt. He had been there by her side, for so far five months of chemotherapy, he'd been supportive and loving and generous. He spoiled her, really, and while Calleigh had never taken too kindly to being pampered, when he did it, it felt different. Now, she didn't know what she felt, she was so confused. Mostly because she couldn't work out the reason why he'd asked. "Calleigh?" Alexx pressed.

Calleigh looked into her eyes, letting tears trickle unaided and undeterred, down her cheeks. "He asked me to marry him." She sobbed, dropping her face back into her shoulder as Alexx' arms came around her, holding her tight as she rubbed her back.

"And what did you say?"

"I said," Calleigh choked on a sob as she recalled earlier in the night, the love in Eric's eyes and the look on his face when she'd run as fast as she could, out of their house.

_"I've got a surprise for you," Eric whispered, covering her eyes with his hands from behind as he turned her away from her dresser and guided her down the hall to the living room. He hadn't allowed her to finish dressing, but to his defense, he'd have said that he preferred her in next to nothing anyway. Being careful of her toes, because Calleigh knew the last few remaining unpacked boxes of Eric's stuff, was still stacked up in the hall, she giggled as she let him guide her out into the living room, where the air smelled of vanilla and roses and the soft Dance of the Sugerplum fairy filled her ears. It was her clandestine favourite, a little known fact that Eric had great joy in knowing and keeping all to himself. "Stand here," He whispered, leading her over to where she expected to hit her shins against the coffee table, but instead found herself stepping onto a plush floor cushion. "and you can open your eyes...now." He pulled his hands away, letting her eyes flutter open and adjust to the light on their own. He stepped back, watching her shoulders rise in surprise as she turned to him with a bright smile on her face._

_"What is all this?" She beamed, looking around at the flowers that filled the room and the faintly flickering candles that littered every surface._

_Patiently awaiting a response, Calleigh's breathing deepened when he gripped both of her hands in his and slowly lowered himself down on one knee on top of the cushions. Her smile fell away and her nails dug into his palms, he could feel it, but while she was scared out of her mind, Eric figured the sensation bellied her excitement instead of abject fear. "Calleigh," He dropped one hand, slipping it into his pocket and pulling out the small velvet box that had been in his company for several months already. Now, it was finally going to see the light and be with it's rightful owner. "I want to know if you'll do me the great honour, of being my wife."_

_She was stunned. She stared blankly at him, not even looking down at the small white-gold ring covered with modest little diamonds, all the way around. It was beautiful, but much to his chagrin, she hadn't yet seen it. She didn't know what to say, she didn't know if she could remember how to breathe and when she realised that she did remember, she dropped to her knees in front of him and let out a huge, shuddering breath. "Eric," She gasped, looking up to his eyes and immediately feeling like the worst, most horrible person on the planet for what she was about to say. "no."_

_"Cal, you don't have to,"_

_"No, Eric," She shook her head, dropping his hands and trying to pull away from him, but Eric was faster and he took hold of her hand again, keeping her still and holding her as firmly as he could without hurting her. "please." She wept. "don't do this."_

_"What, why?"_

_"Eric, don't pity me. Don't think you need to do this because I might not," She stopped still, because as strong as she was, even she couldn't speak the very real possibility that had been hanging over them since that day in the locker-room._

_"What?" He suddenly became angry and while she didn't blame him, she didn't completely understand. "because you might not survive?" __That hurt and he knew it, they both did, but Calleigh's defenses were working full throttle and he couldn't let her smother herself again, not now. Ever since she was diagnosed, he'd been right there, right beside her and sometimes she feared that it was because he pitied her, because he didn't want his best friend to suffer alone. Then they'd argue about something small like him forgetting to use a coaster, and she'd see the truth in what they had. Right now though, the idea of him doing this because he felt he had to, terrified her more than the possibility that he might actually want to._

_"Eric," She rasped and he reached down to grab her left hand, pulling it up and holding her firm so that he could slip the ring onto her finger. It was then that she saw it and the breath was momentarily knocked out of her. The ring was stunning, so simple and elegant and while it didn't look like the most expensive ring in the world, to her, it looked priceless because it had come from Eric's pocket. Immediately, she felt guilty, but even with the cool gold of the ring against her finger, her resolve didn't falter._

_"This is yours, Calleigh, I bought it for you." He stated, ducking his head to kiss her hand before she tried to pull it away again, this time, succeeding. She stood up quickly and jumped away from him, pulling at the ring desperately as he watched her from his knees. He hadn't expected that reaction, he hadn't expected her to want rid of the ring so badly that she'd pull at it as though it were burning her and there was nothing his body could do, but stare, because he could barely comprehend what was happening. "Cal," He whispered and she stilled. Her shoulders slumped and she cast her eyes down to the floor, to a spot on the cushion just shy of his knees. With the ring sitting forgotten in he palm of her right hand._

_"This isn't fair on you, Eric, I can't let you do this,"_

_"You can't let me do this? Cal, I want to do this."_

_She looked into his eyes as he stood, pulling herself away from him because she wanted so desperately to believe him but her mind just kept hitting her with the fear that if she wasn't sick, would he have asked? She shook her head, trying to shake away the fog. He reached for her then, attempting to take her into his arms, but she shied away and before he could catch her, she dashed for the door. She grabbed his jacket off the back of his lazy-boy and he just watched her as she frantically searched for her keys, before giving up and taking the keys to his Hummer, slamming the door as she disappeared._

"Calleigh, what's so wrong with Eric proposing?" Alexx rubbed her shoulders soothingly, realising that her friend was having a momentary panic attack that would pass, if she managed to say the right thing. She'd realise what was happening, if Alexx could calm her and tell her what she hadn't given Eric the chance to say.

"Nothing," Calleigh sniffed. "everything." When she noticed Alexx' skeptical smirk she found herself smiling faintly, even though she didn't feel in the mood to smile. "It's just, why now?" Alexx had never seen her this conflicted. "Why did he ask me this now, does he feel sorry for me, Alexx?"

"Of course he does, honey, but that's not why he asked you to marry him." Calleigh furrowed her brow and Alexx smiled adoringly, adjusting the end of her scarf that was caught in her jacket and laying a hand on top of hers on her knee. "He loves you, Calleigh, I have no doubt that he wants to marry you."

"But he,"

"Has a past?" Alexx cut her off. "Has secrets? Has a reputation?" She frowned. "Since when has any of that bothered you, Calleigh?"

"It doesn't," She defended. "But I can't help thinking that if I wasn't sick, would he have even asked?"

Alexx shrugged. "Does it matter? I mean, does it _really _matter?" Calleigh cast her eyes across the room, studying the family portrait on the wall of Alexx, her husband, Bryan and Jamie. They looked so happy and content. She wanted that and she knew that that's what Eric was handing her. She knew he was opening the doors for her to tell him everything she'd ever wanted and he was the kind of man to write down a list and a full description and do everything in his power, to give all of it to her. But she was afraid and she was confident enough to admit that to herself, if not Alexx. Then her eyes drifted to the photo right beside it from years ago, with herself, Alexx, Eric. Alexx' husband was on a business trip and the team had treated her and her kids to a day at the park. Jamie and Bryan were still small and with Bryan on Speed's shoulders and Jamie on his, Eric had a bright beaming smile on his face. She remembered how happy he was that day. It was the first time she'd ever seen him really interact with kids and had learnt that day, how passionately he wished to have his own some day.

Now he was asking her to marry him and she had no reassurance that children was something she could promise. She'd never thought about it before, but she wanted them so badly and she did want them with him, but she didn't know if she could handle the pain if she was told it would never happen and she was there, to see Eric's heart break. She didn't want that for him. She knew that she could survive but Eric; she couldn't be the one to do that to him. At least, that's what she told herself as she tried to justify the blatant 'no' she'd thrown in his face.

"Calleigh," Alexx pressed her, gently taking her hand into her lap and frowning when Callegh refused to open her palm. "What's this?" She turned her hand over, prying her fingers open as Calleigh tore her eyes away. Alexx gasped when she saw the ring there, still held tightly in her hand. "Honey, this is beautiful."

"Yeah," She sniffed. "it's the most beautiful ring I've ever seen. And I ran out of there with it in my hand, I should have at least given it back."

Calleigh didn't see the smile spread on her friend's face, nor did she notice the tear in the corner of her eye. Alexx knew that Calleigh didn't want to give the ring back. For as long as she'd known the pair of them, there had always been that little extra sparkle in the room when the two of them were there at the same time. With Speedle, they used him to gang up on each other and with Ryan, they seemed to join forces against their new, less imposing fresh meat. But either way, there was always a chemical reaction when they were near and she'd been feeding off that for years. Regardless of all the stories Alexx had heard about Eric, she saw in him a man with a profound capacity for love and the genuine want to have someone to cherish. In Calleigh, she'd seen her pick off one after the other - in search of what? - she still wasn't quite sure, but she knew Calleigh needed someone to make right the years she'd spent wishing her childhood had been different and Eric was the one she just never seemed to be able to completely dispose of. One squabble after another, Alexx had been biding her time for this moment.

"Calleigh, sweetheart, it really doesn't matter why he asked you now. What matters is that he asked and honey you know he wouldn't have asked if he didn't want to marry you. You _know_ that."

Calleigh turned her eyes back to Alexx, studied her genuine smile and the eyes that hadn't lied to her in over eleven years. Looking at Alexx, she could feel for the first time, what having a real mother must have felt like. She loved her own, but the love she felt for her mother was gratitude for years of nice clothes, fantastic shoes and the freedom to do what she'd wanted when she was a teenager, not the comfort, the compassion and the care that Alexx showed her each and every day. They were all things she'd sorely missed growing up and it broke her heart to think that Alexx knew her so well, yet she still couldn't managed to bring herself to take her at her word, not on this.

"Alexx," She started but stopped herself when Alexx looked into her eyes.

"You can stay as long as you need, baby girl." Alexx smiled, pulling Calleigh into her arms in a tight embrace.

"But I really shouldn't stay, Alexx, I mean you have your family,"

Alexx chuckled lightly. "Oh, honey, you're a part of my family, don't you ever forget that."

Calleigh smiled a genuine, if strained, smile. She watched her friend as she got up and retreived a cushion from a nearby lounge-chair and she did as instructed when Alexx pressed the cushion into the arm of the chair and encouraged her to lay her head down. Alexx tucked the blanket around her, not even attempting to try and remove the coat from around her shoulders and Calleigh was thankful that she didn't call her on that need to keep it close. Deep down, the both of them knew that this moment of fear and hesitation had little to do with Eric's question and so much more to do with Calleigh's well-hidden fears.

Alexx watched her from the door to the room, standing as a silhouette as she watched her young friend shiver even though her home was warm and wrap the jacket further around her, snuggling down into it as though it were Eric there, holding her close and safe. "Your head will clear by morning, baby." Alexx promised in that motherly, knowing tone that often had Calleigh readily believing her. _'I hope so.'_ She wished to herself as the door closed her in darkness and she closed her eyes, knowing she'd get about as much sleep as Eric would, that night.

* * *

Eric chewed on his bottom lip as he stared at the phone. The only light on in the entire house, was the lamp sitting just to his left, and after nearly three hours of waiting with no word from Calleigh, he couldn't bring himself to leave the the idle phone. He'd be lying to say that he wasn't terrified. She was upset and she hadn't been feeling well since her round of chemo just the day before. He didn't know where she'd gone and as the thought of all the most horrible things that could go wrong, passed through his mind, he felt his cheeks flush and his hands start to sweat with fear.

He nearly jumped clean out of his skin when the phone actually rang. He took a few deep, calming breaths before he fumbled anxiously to pick it up. He pressed it to his ear hurriedly and when he was greetd wtih silence, he choked out the only word he could stomach. "Calleigh?"

"No, honey, it's me."

"Alexx," He sighed deeply, rubbing his fingers along his forehead, feeling the sweat on the back of his neck as the fear returned. "I know it's late, Eric, but I wanted you to know that Calleigh's here."

His eyes opened wide. "She's there?" He could barely express how releived he was, to hear that she'd gone to Alexx. Of all the places she could have gone, Alexx' home was by far the best choice. He didn't even want to relive the terrifying thoughts that had run through his head over the past three hours. To hear she was with Alexx, he knew she was at least safe. "Is she alright?" He knew that Alexx would hear the worry in his voice, but he didn't really care. If anyone could know of Eric's emotions - all of them - and never judge him on them, it was Alexx.

"Yeah, baby, she's alright. She's a little upset and I think she's a little scared, but she's going to be fine."

"Good," He released a shuddering breath. "thank god."

"She's going to stay here tonight. But are _you_ going to be alright?" Keeping silent as long as he could, he tried to swallow his disappointment as he licked his lips and thought of the best response. If he were honest, he'd tell her that he'd never be fine until Calleigh was back with him where he could see her, touch her and know that she was going to be alright. He wasn't going to be completely fine until he could make it clear to her, that no matter what her answer, he'd still love her.

"Yeah,"

"So," He could hear the smile on the older woman's lips. "you proposed?"

Eric chewed the inside of his cheek as he lent back into the cushions, resting his head against the back of the couch as he closed his eyes. "Yeah, I did. What little good it did me."

"Oh, I don't think you need to worry, honey, Calleigh's a complicated lady, we all know that," Eric nodded, even though she couldn't see him. "she's just scared, Eric and she's got every right to be. Just, make sure you let her know why you want this. She needs to feel safe, now more than ever."

"All I want is for her to feel safe. I'm not like her parents, Alexx."

"I know, honey. I know how much you care for her."

Eric's voice lowered as he looked up to the small photo of Calleigh, smiling with her father, that sat on the mantle. "I really want to marry her, Alexx."

With her voice just as low, Eric's heart warmed at her motherly tone. "I know, baby."

TBC


	7. Chapter 7

_**And you can  
shake the mountains with a whisper  
and you, you speak  
And I fall at your feet again.**_  
~ Lifehouse

* * *

Eric woke suddenly, feeling a sharp pain in his neck as he tried to sit up. He'd fallen asleep sitting up on the couch, not too long after his short conversation with Alexx had ended. He'd been relieved to hear that Calleigh was alright and as the rush of worry and anguish had left him, it had left behind in it's wake, an exhaustion that practically drained him dry. His eyes had closed and his mind had shut off, until that very moment when he realised taking those few extra steps to the bedroom would have been far more desirable for his currently aching neck. He rubbed at it, sliding to sit on the edge of the couch as he looked out onto the moonlit backyard. It was silent and coated in a peaceful blue hue and when he looked to the clock on the microwave, he realised it was because it was barely even four in the morning.

Groaning as he tried to get up, Eric stopped short when he heard a key in the front door. He sat silently in the dark, listening as she closed the door and set his keys in the small ceramic bowl on the side table. Quiet footfalls on the tiles carried her through the entryway towards him, but he couldn't bring himself to turn to her, for fear that it was a dream. He could feel her eyes on the back of his head and as he turned, his shoulders tensed at the sight of her frantically looking away. He reached for the lamp to turn it back on and when he looked back to her he could see that she had her hands twisted in the sleeves of his jacket and Alexx must have given her a pair of sweats because they were so long her feet were covered. For someone so bold, someone he'd always seen as larger than life, she looked so tiny, like a saddened child buried in a basket of laundry with red-rimmed eyes because she'd been forgotten in the game of hide and seek.

She glanced at him, looking at his face for a split second before looking across the room, setting her eyes on the mantle as she nervously rubbed her feet together.

Every moment they spent in silence, Eric's heart beat faster and faster. But he knew he couldn't be the one to speak first. Even though her answer had been 'no', he couldn't shake the feeling that there was something she needed to say and the last thing he wanted to do, was scare her away from saying it.

"Alexx said she called you." She stated quietly.

"Yeah, she did."

"I'm glad, I," She paused. "I knew you'd worry but I couldn't,"

"Cal, it's alright." He lowered his voice. "I'm just glad you're okay."

They fell into silence again and her shoulders rose and fell in a deep breath as she attempted to calm her nerves.

"Does she know that you left so early? She'll be worried."

"I, I left a note."

Eric nodded, biting his lip as he rested his elbows on his knees and pressed his palms together. He knew Alexx would understand, because Calleigh wouldn't have left a fleeting message, that wasn't her way.

"Eric, I," Calleigh pulled her hands further into her sleeves. He didn't want her to have to suffer with this, and he certainly didn't want it to cause her any unnecessary stress. He wanted to marry her, but his want wasn't worth her anguish. He could wait, he would wait; as long as it took. And if that meant taking it all back, well then, he'd do it.

"Calleigh, if you don't want to, we don't have to get,"

She cut him off, meeting his eyes for the first time and the pained expression he saw there stopped him silent.

"I want to marry you, I do," She flinched slightly, noticing the surprise in his eyes. But she couldn't fault him for it, especially when she'd dashed out of the house, leaving nothing for him to assume, but that marriage was the last thing that she wanted. She hugged his jacket around her tighter, wrapping her arms around her body as she moved to stand in front of him, between him and the fireplace. "But I need to know that you didn't ask me for the wrong reasons. I just, I don't want you to pity me."

"Cal, I don't,"

"Why now?" She looked down to the floor again, just shy of his toes. "I need to know that you didn't ask just because it'd be nice before I," She couldn't gather the strength to continue the sentence she'd started, because she knew what she'd been getting at. Looking up at him through her lashes, Calleigh could see by the way that his shoulders had tensed, that he knew what she'd meant too. She studied him, biting her lip as she saw him digging his nails nervously into the edge of his thumb.

"Calleigh," Eric released a long, deep breath; A disappointed sigh. "you're not going to die." She dropped her eyes back to his toes as he looked up at her, a constant see-saw of looking and not looking.

"You don't know that, Eric."

"No, Calleigh, I can't know that for sure." He breathed in frustration, not at her but at their situation. "Dying is a possibility, yes." For a moment, the see-saw levelled out and green met brown. "But it's only _one_ possibility. And okay, so maybe I asked you now because that one possibility is very real and it scares the hell out of me but, Calleigh, I still would have asked even if you weren't sick. Maybe not now," He pressed his hands together. "but that would have been my loss. If this has taught me anything, it's that we can't take anything for granted. I want to be your husband," He watched her as she slowly lowered herself to her knees before him, reaching out with sleeve-covered hands for his thighs and resisting the urge to kneel between his legs and let his arms encircle her. And she was thankful, with that steel southern defience in her head, that he'd said he wanted to be her husband as opposed to wanting her to be his wife. She could thank his childhood in a house with four women, for that smart choice of phrase.

"Eric,"

Eric lurched forward and Calleigh's eyes widened as he grasped her hands tightly through the sleeves of the coat and he dropped down to the floor, gently pulling her towards him until she was so close there was nowhere she could look but into his eyes."I don't want to spend another moment, not being your husband."

Calleigh nodded silently, looking down at his hands wrapped around her wrists. She breathed in deeply through her nose, looking up into his eyes again as she blinked away the first signs of tears that were teasing at the corners of her eyes. She tried to pull her hands away, slipping them back and scrunching her shoulders until Eric finally, reluctantly, released her. She reached into her pocket and he watched her intently, smiling as the small ring he'd given her earlier, emerged and sat on her palm between them.

"So we try this again?" He asked, reaching for the ring, but she stopped him, brushing his hand away and rising up on her knees so that they were as close to the same height as they could manage.

"No," She pressed her free hand to his cheek, brushing her thumb along his lips as she allowed her smile to break free. "now I'm asking you."

* * *

_**Fortunate to have you girl,  
I'm so glad you're in my world,  
Just as sure as the sky is blue,  
I bless the day that I found you.  
**_~ _Fortunate, _Maxwell

* * *

Eric's favourite pastime was to watch her sleep, studying her features as the fading moonlight cast a beam across her face. As she lay contentedly beside him he could see that she was lightly flushed with a soft pink to her cheeks and as her lips pursed and she curled herself closer into his side, he smiled, wrapping his arms around her and placing a gentle kiss to the top of her head. He wasn't sure if he'd ever adjust to feeling soft skin against his lips as he kissed her head but he hoped for many years of choking on her long hair in his sleep to help him forget. The thought always pained him, the reasons why he no longer had the luxury of running his fingers through her hair. But when she'd whisper his name in her sleep and furrow her brow when she couldn't quite reach him, he knew that that was the last thing he should worry about. What was important, was making her as happy as he could, in every way he could imagine.

The sun was slowly rising, filling their bedroom in a soft orange glow and he silently wished for more mornings just like this one. He was grateful that she'd accepted his offer, to go back to bed together for the few brief hours they still had of the night. They'd had that one, painful moment of hesitation - small now, when he considered the spanse of their life together - and he'd feared for his entire future in those long hours that she was gone. But she'd come back. Eric's main comfort was that Calleigh Duquesne found it hard to ever come back, but she'd done it and he drew strength from the notion that she'd done it for him; them.

When she'd asked him to marry her, he'd laughed wholeheartedly and taken her into his arms. He'd kissed her with all the strength that he had and he didn't even have to think about his answer. Just that she'd turned his question back on him, was proof enough that she'd realised she wanted it too. Nothing could have made him happier, or more proud of her.

Running his fingers along her brow, he wondered how she'd look on the day, when it'd be or how happy it'd make him. He started to imagine a time when there would be a sense of 'everyday' to their lives. When he could introduce her as 'my wife' instead of 'Officer Duquesne' and there would be a pair of small, sandelled feet running circles around the pair of them as they sipped Mimosas, danced with his parents and he and his dad stood vigil over the pig for Noche Buena.

* * *

The lab was practically silent early in the morning and Calleigh never failed to be grateful for that. She loved the hour or two, when the night shift were slowly filing out and the dayshift were taking their time to drag themselves in. She and Eric had driven to work together and were grateful for the empty elevator when he'd cheekily pressed his lips to hers, momentarly breaking their 'not at work' rule and breaking apart reluctantly as the elevator doors opened to their floor. She'd laughed gently, when she saw his lips covered in smeered pink lip-gloss and decided, rather diabolically, that she wasn't going to tell him.

The lights were dim in the Ballistics lab and because none of her staff had arrived just yet, she made no move to turn them up.

"Wow," Calleigh looked up as the voice invaded her silence, seeing the surprise in Natalia's large, brown eyes. "Eric proposed?"

Calleigh looked like a deer caught in the head-lights. "What! Who told you that?!" Natalia shook her head, immediately waving her arms in defense, but Calleigh was on fire. "I knew it! Men should not be allowed to even enter that washroom at the same time. They're worse than women. Who did he tell? Was it Wolfe?" She slammed her hands down on the benchtop angrily and got up. She closed up her files before finally looking back up to Natalia and noticing her amused expression. "What, Nat?"

"Nothing," She laughed. "it's just, I've never seen you this mad."

"Well we promised to keep it between the two of us, that's all." Calleigh fell back into her stool, suddenly deflated. "We haven't even talked about it together yet."

"Well, if it's any consolation, Calleigh, no one told me."

"Then how did you," Calleigh paused, looking down at her hand still rested on the bench and the delicate ring on her finger. She sighed deeply with her eyes closed, immediately feeling incredibly stupid. "Oh my god," Calleigh laughed, pressing her hand to her forehead in embarressment. "sorry, Nat."

"It's alright," Natalia waved her hand, making her way around the bench with a grin on her face. "so," She pointed to the ring. "when did this happen?"

Calleigh took a deep breath and felt her mood slowly brighten up again as she tucked her left hand self-consciously into her lap. "Last night." She smiled gently, remembering the look on Eric's face when she'd woken up that morning to find him watching her. She'd felt so much more comfortable in his arms than she had waking alone on Alexx' couch. She was grateful to her friend, for the temporary bed and the wisdom that she unreservedly gave, but she'd been right, of course. Calleigh had awoken clearer, less afraid and because of that, she'd been anxious to find Eric and explain.

"Well, that's great Calleigh, congratulations."

"Thank you."

"So," Natalia lent her elbows on the bench, lowering her voice conspiratorially. "what are your plans? Any ideas for bridal party yet? Locations? Please tell me the cake will be chocolate."

Calleigh chuckled gently at Natalia's enthusiasm, leaning back a little in her stool to think about it for a moment, considering she hadn't given it any thought just yet. "I don't really know yet, to be honest. At my brother's wedding I promised my sister-in-law Melissa that she'd be my Matron of honour, considering that I was her Maid but as for the rest, I don't know." She shrugged.

"Church or less conservative?" Natalia beamed and Calleigh frowned.

"I don't know, I think we'll need to talk to Carmen and Pavel about that." At the confused crease in Natalia's brow, Calleigh smirked. "Eric's parents, they're quite catholic."

"Ah," She nodded. "you know his parents well?"

"Oh," Calleigh waved her hand in dismissal. "it's got nothing to do with our relationship, really, I've known his parents for years. You know, Carmen used to fill my refrigerator with dinners all sorted by the days of the week, she'd even label them with what they were and I used to think that it made me special, until I realised she did the same thing for both Eric and Speed. She didn't want any of us starving with the hours we work. I felt like I was back in third grade." She laughed. Natalia was smiling wistfully and Calleigh didn't notice the recognition in her friend's eyes or the slight smirk that grew on her lips, when another body crept into the room behind her and pressed his finger to his lips to ensure her silence.

"Yeah," He breathed in her ear, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind, grinning when Calleigh lent back into him. "but my Mom never made Flan for Speed or me."

"She knows I have good taste, that's all." Calleigh defended. But the pair of them knew that Carmen had always had a soft spot for Calleigh. Probably grateful for her being the only constant, beautiful, young woman in Eric's life who carried a strong, intelligent head on her shoulders.

"So, how did she get into your house?" Natalia asked curiously. Calleigh and Eric both reached into their pockets, pulling out a nearly identical set of colour-coded keys and held them up to show her.

"Blue for Eric," Calleigh held up hers, lifting each different key as she explained them. "green for Speedle, yellow for Eric's parents, pink for Horatio, red for my Dad. Carmen has my key."

"Hey, I don't have Horatio's." Eric whined when he looked down at his keys with near identical colours to hers, but Calleigh just smirked and patted his arm.

"Trust me, Sweetpea, you don't want it. I helped him move some stuff once and there was absolutely no food there for you to steal. I swear the man lives on nothing but coffee." Eric laughed, kissing her temple as he stood up behind her.

"Okay, well, I've got work to do so I'll leave you guys alone," Natalia turned to Eric. "Congratulations, by the way."

"Thanks, Nat."

She turned to leave but she stopped herself with her hand on the door and turned back around. "Oh and," She smirked. "mum's the word." The couple smiled gratefully in response, taking their places and standing a good foot apart from each other. If anyone said they were anything less than professional, she'd argue quite insistantly to the contrary.

TBC.


	8. Chapter 8

Hello lovelies. I'm sorry that this chapter has taken a little longer. My neice was here yesterday and I spent the whole day with her. The poor little thing is teething and she's only four months old, she's so precious. We had a lot of laughs and she loves to howl, so we sit there for ages just howling at each other. It's very adorable on her end, mine, not so much. Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter, we're kind of back into the emotional upheval, but that's the point of angst, right? *hugs you all* Anyway, here it is. Also, I've made a music video for this story, it's posted to my youtube channel "Speckleberry" if anyone would like to check it out. I'd post a link here, but we all know how well this site deals with that. I really hope you guys check it out, because I'm very proud of that and my video "The Gates Of Dawn" that just won 1st place in an E/C video contest. (If you can't find my channel but want to see it, PM me and we'll work something out.)

Oh and points to anyone who can spot the reference to the Season 8 Promo.

**_

* * *

_**

_**I will not make the same mistakes that you did  
I will not let myself, Cause my heart so much misery  
I will not break the way you did, You fell so hard  
I've learned the hard way, To never let it get that far.  
**~ Because of You,_ Kelly Clarkson

* * *

Calleigh never really got used to the humidity in Darnell. The heat in Miami often rested on that ocean breeze that managed to clear the air of it's suffocating weight, but in Darnell, the heat was thick and sticky and it made her think of the years she and Wyatt had spent, sitting in the back yard under the garden hose, because their parents weren't around to take them to the pool. Their home sat on a hill, secluded from the rest of the town. It was large and she'd always thought it was somewhat ostentacious. But it was left to her mother by her grandfather and Calleigh did love the infinate hiding places she could find within the old rooms, when she and Wyatt had no one else to play with, but each other - or when she needed somewhere to escape the yelling, or worse yet, the cold silence.

She'd wanted to do nothing more than make a phone call and hopefully get her answering machine. But Eric thought that it would be better for her, to meet the woman face to face. In truth, a part of Calleigh really did want to face her. Their relationship over the past years was built of nothing but strained phone calls, a christmas card every year and a small gift on her birthday that came in the mail about a week too late. If anything dangerous was on the news about Miami, she'd recieve a call, begging her to come home. But she'd make elaborate excuses and use her mother's frustrating insistance as reason enough, to avoid calling again for another month at least. It was a back and forth that they'd danced Calleigh's entire life. When it suited her, she was her mother. But when Calleigh's needs became too large, the fault had always fallen with her father and due to his skills of avoidance, Calleigh would be left to fend for herself.

The only part about it that made Calleigh nervous, was that Eric hadn't been able to get the weekened off to accompany her to Louisiana and going alone had never been something Calleigh enjoyed.

It wasn't something she was looking forward too, but as Calleigh pulled the rental car up into the driveway, she felt a strange sense of nostalgia as she looked up at the house. It was tidier than she remembered it, the shutters had been re-painted and straightened. The gardens were trimmed and cared for and the woman seated on the front porch, stood to her feet with a curious look on her very familiar features as Calleigh shut off the engine.

She sat there for as long as she could, feeling the older woman's eyes on her whilst she refused to move, hoping she hadn't yet realised who it was in the car. The woman waved hesitantly, encouraging her out of the car and Calleigh took a deep breath, curling her keys around her finger as she grabbed her handbag off the passenger seat and climbed out of the car. Hitching her bag over her shoulder, Calleigh adjusted her jeans and straightened her white tank-top as she carefully made her way up the path in her high, cork wedges. One thing she could always be grateful to her mother for, was her fashion sense. Admittedly, living in Miami for over ten years, her style had adapted, but the fundamental basics of her sense of style, came from the always entirely put together, Charlotte Duquesne.

Stepping up into the shade of the porch, Calleigh smiled as she slipped her sunglasses from her eyes. "Hey momma," She blushed, as the realisation seemed to dawn in her mother's bright green eyes. The two women stood staring at each other for a moment, Calleigh's smile slowly slipping away as her mother surveyed her appearance with a critical eye. She studied her clothes, her shoes and Calleigh chose to ignore the confused frown that crossed her face as she took note of the silk, paisley scarf around her head.

"Calleigh girl, what are you doing here?"

Calleigh's smile completely fell away. "I thought you'd be happy to see me."

"I am," She sounded a little less than genuine. "I'm just surprised. I thought, well," She paused. "you're always working and you're just so busy."

Calleigh laughed nervously, tucking her hands into her pockets as she shrugged. "I actually haven't been working as much lately." It was true, since the day she'd realised that things weren't going to be as easy going as she'd hoped, with her cancer, Calleigh insisted that she ease up on her own workload. She was fine in the ballistics lab, where everything was practically second nature, but when every now and then her 'chemo brain' got worse, she'd find herself forgetting things that were just too important to forget when you work in the field of forensic science. Eric had done his best to convince her that nothing she could do, would make them doubt her skill, but she knew the more he said it, the more he was trying to ease her mind rather than convince her that she really was fine. She'd reached the point where nothing would convince her she was fine, but at that point, she'd come to terms with that and had become as comfortable as she could be with the idea of not being fine for a very long time. She'd stopped participating with interrogations because any criminal with half the amount of intelligence that they did, could spot her a mile away and the dark hole of hurt that surrounded her appearance. She'd become a target and a tired one at that, so she'd purposely restricted herself to paperwork and firearms evidence within her own lab. "I get home in the daylight now," She chuckled, earning from her mother, a brief smile.

"So," The older woman shuffled in her sandel wedges. "why have you come? Surely not just to see your Momma."

"Well," Calleigh chuckled, hiding her perpetual disappointment behind her consistant smile. "I actually did, I have a few things to tell you."

"Nothing that couldn't be said over the phone?"

Calleigh rolled her eyes. "No, Momma, seriously can't I just come and see you?"

"Well, frankly, Calleigh girl, when you walked out of here twelve years ago stating you'd never come back, I _did_ believe you."

Calleigh's shoulders slumped. "Does it upset you so much, that I might want that to change?"

"Nobody changes, sweetpea." He mother stated, stepping past her and making her way into the house. Calleigh immediately chased her, stepping into the house and dropping her handbag on the side table as she followed her mother through to the kitchen. She knew her mother didn't blame her for the rift between them, but neither could she ever find it within her to place the blame solely on her own shoulders. It just wasn't her way. She'd rather blame her entire failed marriage on Duke's drinking than admit she'd been neglectful to her own children even though she knew Calleigh's troubles with her father had eased between them to the point where she could smile when she heard his voice through the phone. Daddy's little girl, Charlotte would say. Calleigh would put it down to effort. He put effort in, he tried to change; Charlotte didn't.

Calleigh watched her mother intently as she poured two deep glasses of sweet tea, pushing one across the kitchen counter to Calleigh as she slipped onto a stool. It brought back memories of the afternoons she'd arrive home from school with sweat-soaked tendrils of blond hair stuck to the back of her neck, to her mother's sweet tea and five minutes of pretending they cared for what the other had done all day. It was the days of when Calleigh thought there was hope for their dwindling relationship, but after so many high-school years of the same ritual, she learnt just how little it actually meant.

"So, did you bring a bag to stay the night?" Charlotte questioned, taking a seat on the opposite side of the island bench, sipping her tea slowly. Trust Momma, Calleigh thought, to completely disregard the tension in favour of pretending they had a normal relationship. Though Calleigh had to admit, Charlotte wasn't stupid and she knew that Calleigh's southern demurity would insist she spend the night in her house, instead of insulting her estranged parent.

She nodded. "Yeah, it's in the car."

Silence filled the room for a moment, as the two women so alike in appearance, yet so different in personality, sipped their sweet tea and avoided eye contact. Charlotte took a deep breath, letting out a prolonged sigh and Calleigh bit her lip, awaiting the coming conversation on baited breath.

"So, what is it you've come all this way to talk to me about?"

Calleigh swallowed deeply and carefully placed her glass down on the bench. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath to clear her head before opening them and setting her matching green eyes on her mother. "Well," She pressed her palms to the benchtop, her right on top of her left. "I have two things to tell you, one is good and one is," She chuckled sardonically. "not so good."

"I suppose the _'not so good'_ has something to do with this?" Charlotte pointed to the paisley scarf and Calleigh touched her fingers to the edge of it, just above her eyebrow, self-consciously. Ever the observant woman, Charlotte barely ever missed much.

"Actually, it does." She nodded, swallowing. "About six months ago, I was diagnosed with Stage I Breast Cancer," She watched her mother's expression change from detached to something just short of terrified and it warmed her heart, just a little, to think that her mother really, genuinely, cared for her. She knew that she loved her, a part of her had always known that her mother loved her somewhere behind the thick make-up and the unaffected facade. But to care for her well-being, that was something she'd rarely seen. "it's been, hard, but-"

Her mother cut her off. "Cancer?" Charlotte stared down at her cherry red toe-nails for a moment as her voice lowered to a surprised whisper before she looked back into her daughter's eyes. "Really?"

"Yeah, Momma," Calleigh tried a smile. "but I'm okay, really. I wasn't okay at first, but I'm doing well. The surgery removed the tumor in my breast and I've already gone through six rounds of chemo."

"How could you possibly be okay, Calleigh, you have cancer."

"Yeah, Mom, I know." She nodded. "But I am okay, I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner, but we've been trying so hard to come terms with it that it's been hard to talk about it with anyone at any great length. Daddy knows, he's been really helpful," Calleigh smiled wistfully. "he hasn't even had a drink in five months." They fell silent again and Calleigh knew that it was, in part, due to her mention of her father but she'd decided a long time ago that she wasn't going to sheild her parents from the things that mattered to her, that didn't mean she didn't try and keep the peace as best she could. "Um," She looked to her side, thinking. "Eric's been great, better than great, actually," Charlotte looked up, her mood a little brighter. "you remember I told you about him?"

"Eric," Charlotte pondered the name. "Oh, yes, you work with him right? He's a," She blinked. "he's a diver?"

"Yeah," Calleigh grinned, grateful that her mother remembered something she'd done her best to mention in passing. "he's a pretty amazing CSI too. We're, um," She bit her lip, fidling with the ring she'd been hiding under her other hand before slipping her hand aside, letting her see it if she wanted to see it. "we're getting married, Momma, that was the good news." She beamed, hoping that her mother's expression would change from surprised, to some small form of happy. But she didn't move, didn't even flinch, just stared at Calleigh's hands on the benchtop with an unreadable expression.

"But I've never met him."

Calleigh's eyes widened. That was the best she could do? Fury raged within her, but she kept her features impassive as she stared into her mother's green eyes. She could barely fathom how her mother, who had always treated her more like one of her bimbo friends, could think Calleigh needed her to approve of the man she was going to marry. In her experience, Eric was a better person than anyone in her life she'd ever shared a home with, even Wyatt whom she loved dearly, but he had their father's short temper. She ground her teeth together, trying her best to gather up her emotions before she let out a deep breath and answered.

"No, I know," She needed to take another breath. "but you will, when you come to the wedding."

"Calleigh," Charlotte started, but the legs of Calleigh's stool grinding on the floor-tiles as she stood, silenced her.

"Momma, I'm happy. For the first time in my life, really happy. And I've got _Cancer_!" She laughed bitterly. "Please, do not make this about you."

"About me? Calleigh, how could you even,"

"Because it's always been about you, Momma, my birthdays were nothing but a reason for you to get trashed with your friends. And then whenever I wanted something, whenever I started to dream of what I wanted for my life, you'd give me a list ten miles long about all the ways I wasn't cut out for it or how you could have done it, but you got pregnant instead. Do you know how much that hurt me?" Charlotte stared at her, flabbergasted as Calleigh ranted. "I love Eric, Momma and I love Miami, I love my job," She stepped around the bench. "I've loved every day of my life since I left this place. And my palms sweat and my knees shake because I'm always so scared of coming back and being judged for everything I do that's different." Storming out of the kitchen, Calleigh didn't hear her mother follow her, until Charlotte's small hand was gripped around her elbow and she spun around, face to face with the woman who stood no more than two inches taller than her.

"I'm sorry!" Charlotte emphasised and Calleigh stopped silent, meeting tear-filled green eyes as though she were looking into a mirror. "I'm so sorry, but all I've ever said has been for you own sake, Calleigh." She choked. "you needed to know about the real world."

"No," Calleigh yanked her arm away. "what I needed was for you to believe in me, for one moment of my life, I needed you to do that. All you ever did was tell me all the ways my dreams would go wrong, you never once said that you beleived I was capable."

"Because you needed to understand that the world isn't that simple."

"No, Momma," Calleigh shook her head. "I needed you to tell me that I could fly, I've learnt that. I needed you to encourage me, to trust me and as crazy as it sounds, I needed you to push me towards the cliff. Every child needs that, Mom, every child needs to think they can do anything and yeah, I would have fallen flat on my face more times than I can count, but who's to say one day I wouldn't just keep on flying. Momma, all I ever wanted was for you to be there to pick me up, dust me off and tell me it was okay to jump again."

"That's a crazy fairytale, Calleigh girl." Charlotte chuckled, but Calleigh's expression didn't soften.

"It might be crazy. But I left this place thinking that my childhood was normal, that your parents are supposed to teach you about the worst in life in order to prepare you for it. But since working at CSI, I've learnt that there are a million and one ways to learn about the atrocities in life, so many ways to learn about the horrors and the failures and I've realised that you are the last person I needed to teach them to me." Charlotte's brow furrowed, but Calleigh didn't allow her to speak. "Eric's parents came to America on a boat, Mom, when Eric was just a baby and his entire life, they've told him that he can do anything he puts his mind to and I'm grateful to them, because if they hadn't taught him that I wouldn't be wearing a ring on my finger right now. If they hadn't told him never to give up on what he wanted, no matter how many times he stared in the face of failure, I would have lost him twelve years ago, the very first time he asked for my number."

"Calleigh," Her mother attempted to placate her, to calm her and perhaps step a word in, but Calleigh wasn't having a bar of it.

"In this house, I had only two choices; Conform to your attempts to make me see the world for what it was, or rebel and find out the truth for myself and, Momma, I'm glad I chose the latter. And maybe that's why I've shattered every stereotypical norm in my department, but I'm proud of that and you know what, Daddy's proud of that too. All I'm asking is for you to accept it."

Calleigh was tired, exhausted really, and the strength was fading from her the longer she held her cold stare on her mother. Charlotte's expression seemed to be cracking, because little did Calleigh know, she'd broken her mother's heart. It's not something she would be ashamed of, because so many times in her life, her mother had known she could shatter a dream with a word and she'd done it. Calleigh had grown up with a mother who shot her own daughter down, because she was slowly becoming everything she'd missed out on. Instead of being a mother to her, she'd been a rival and on occasion, a nasty one. She'd been jealous of Calleigh, because Duke had loved her, Wyatt had adored her and she'd been stubborn enough to fight when everyone around her told her that she wasn't strong enough. It broke her heart to stand there, seeing her own child in so much pain and yet know that it was everything she'd done to her, that hurt the most.

Calleigh was sick and tired of trying so hard. Letting her shoulders slump, she released a breath and took a step away from her mother, crossing her arms over her chest. She wasn't going to fight anymore. She'd waited thirty years for Charlotte to really care and she was sick of waiting for something that didn't exsist.

"I don't want this anymore." She stated and Charlotte's eyes widened a little. "I'm sick of fighting, I'm sick of waiting for something that's not coming. Momma, if you want to be in my life, come to my wedding, come and see," She shrugged. "and maybe you'll see that I'm happy. But if you're going to continue to refuse to see what's right in front of you, then don't bother."

"Calleigh, I just wanted,"

Calleigh cut her off with a lowered, leveled voice."This wedding is going to happen."

"I know."

Charlotte tried to reach out, but Calleigh stepped away from her, out of reach as she hardered her features. "Will you come?"

"Calleigh,"

"Will you come, Mom?"

Charlotte was silent, staring at her daughter inwardly proud of the woman that stood so boldy before her. She couldn't admit it without a lump forming in her throat, an invisible obstacle that kept her inrevocably silent, but she was proud of her daughter. She was so proud of everything she'd managed to become inspite of everything she had done so terribly, achingly wrong. She wanted to go, to see her little girl walk down the aisle, even if she did have to watch her walk on the arm of Kenwall Duquesne. She just couldn't bring her lips to say the words and it seemed, as Calleigh rolled her eyes and dashed out of the house, that she left her answer far too late.

She watched from the hall doorway, as Calleigh dragged her bag from the backseat of her car, pulling it up the front steps before running past her, heading straight for the stairs. "I'll call and transfer my flight to the morning, I'll only be here the night." Before Charlotte could respond, Calleigh was gone, up the stairs and the sound of the bedroom door slam was the last peep she heard out of her daughter.

* * *

Eric tried to ignore the pair of light brown eyes burning the back of his head as he persistantly worked on identifying the lone fingerprint he'd managed to pull from the handle on the trunk of the suspect's car. If he could match it with the suspect, then he could prove that he was the one that had forced the victim into the trunk, they could put the arrogant bastard away and Eric would be able to sleep the night in peace, the night that was creeping up on him faster than he could solve the case, currently. And it certainly didn't help that Natalia was staring at him with that knowing, curious look that made him want to throw something gross at her so that she'd hate him for the rest of the day and finally leave him alone.

"So, planned anything yet?" She finally asked, slipping around Eric's workstation and resting her elbows on the bench. He let out a deep, frustrated sigh, causing her to give him a look but he ignored it in favour of rolling his eyes.

"Seriously, Natalia, I told you we'd tell you."

"Oh come on," She smirked. "I'm riding on being the only one that knows about this wedding, you've got to give me something, it's torture."

"What wedding?"

Eric slammed his eyes closed tight, pressing his lids together until his entire face was scrunched up and his shoulders were so tense it started to hurt. Why, oh why, he thought, did Wolfe have to walk in at that very moment and hear those very words? Why? Eric looked up to the ceiling, biting at his lip as he silently begged god to explain to him why he wanted him to suffer, so badly. Had he done something so terrible in a past life that he felt he needed to suffer now? Had he done something so horrific, that he had to earn Calleigh in the worst way. Natalia was still staring over his shoulder at Wolfe when he finally came back to earth and Wolfe, he knew, was still staring at the back of his head.

"Seriously, guys, what wedding?" He questioned and wisely, for her own sake, Natalia remained silent and repentent.

"It's nothing, Wolfe," Eric shuffled some papers, moving them around and studying the print for the fifth time, through his magnifyer.

"I know the case has nothing to do with a wedding." He joined Natalia on her side of the bench where Eric could finally see him, but he didn't look up. He didn't want to give him the satisfaction of reading his face.

"Let it go, Wolfe." He growled and Ryan edged back.

"What's got him so worked up?"

Natalia opened her mouth to answer, but Eric's phone chirping, stopped her silent. He studied his two colleages in front of him, before ripping his gloves off and flipping his phone open against his ear. He answered, trying to ignore the two sets of eyes watching his every move, now.

"Calleigh, what's wrong?"

"_I just, I need you here._" She whispered and Eric was already climbing out of his chair and pulling his lab coat off. Calleigh never asked for him whilst he was in the middle of a case, she never called, begging for him to come home, not even when she was so violently ill that she couldn't move from the bed without the world around her spinning on it's axis. He knew something had to be terribly wrong and due to the fact that she wasn't even supposed to be back from Louisiana until the following morning, it had something to do with her Mother.

"I'm leaving right now, Cal, alright." Flipping the phone shut, he looked up at Natalia and Ryan. "Can you guys," He gestured towards his evidence and Natalia nodded immediately.

"Yeah, we'll get it done, just go." She pushed and Eric nodded, dashing out of the lab quickly.

Natalia moved around to where Eric had been, watching Ryan as he watched Eric running up the hall and she had to chuckle to herself. Because if she knew Ryan at all, the puzzle about the wedding was going to eat at him until he went mad. He was concerned for Calleigh and that ominous phone call as much as she was, but they knew Eric would be with her in twenty minutes so it was of little concern to them right then; she'd have what she needed.

"I'm not kidding," Ryan stared at her. "what wedding?"

She just smirked and looked down at Eric's computer, restarting the AFIS search, content in the knowledge there was something she knew that she had no intention of telling Ryan.

She loved playing puppeteer.

TBC


	9. Chapter 9

Standing by the corner of the reception desk, he had planned to hand over his visitor's pass and leave, but the scene that drew his attention across the hall, brought that idea to a stand still. Delko, a regular pain in his ass, but not nearly as bad as the ever elusive Horatio Caine jogged up to the latter with a frantic look in his eyes. He wasn't quite sure what he was watching, but with the curious absence of Miami Dade's resident Ballistics expert and the exchange before him that was leading Delko to the elevator; questions swirled in his head.

Horatio had told him that Miss Duquense had a 'family emergency' that she was dealing with that weekend and while, due to Calleigh's flawless record, he didn't really question that - he did have suspicions. Now with Delko disappearing from the lab, suddenly, he felt that the entire staff was keeping something very damaging to themselves. He'd suspected Calleigh and Delko for some time, they were close and sometimes they were too close. He'd seen through glass walls, a touch of hands, a smile, small gifts exchanged in private before all members of the lab converged on the break-room to give and receive Secret Santa presents.

But these weren't kisses or stolen moments, they weren't cases compromised by distraction or bias. And in between Calleigh's abismal relationship with the late John Hagen and her questionable actions in regards to Jake Berkeley, Eric had his fair share of girlfriends that paraded around the reception desk in their stilettos and short dresses - misdirection maybe? He needed more, he needed to know. After all, his naturally curious nature and strict adherence to the rules was why he was so good at his job, regardless that it was the last job he'd wanted.

The doors of the elevator closed with a thud and he took that as his cue to cross the lobby to the man that had caused the majority of his migraines, nodding his head in greeting as he pointed toward the man who was no longer there. "Where's Delko off to?"

"Rick," Horatio looked down to his feet. "is there something I can do for you?"

"A little explanation would be nice. You see, my issue is that your team seems to be pretty careless about the hours they keep, the cases they work. Officer Duquesne hasn't worked the field in over two months."

Horatio held back his anger carefully, taking a breath and pressing his lips together before looking up at Rick. "I assure you, Rick, that Calleigh is meeting the workload I have approved for her. The details of her shortened hours and the personal circumstances she is dealing with, are not your concern."

"Well, that's where you'd be wrong, Horatio." Rick dipped his head. "the proper functioning of this lab is my main concern and when it's CSIs are lagging, I need to be on top of it. I can't do that, if I'm not informed."

"Trust me, Rick," Horatio clenched his teeth, twirling his sunglasses around his fingers. "you are as informed as you need to be."

"Of course I am," He nodded with a touch of sarcasm in his tone. "which is why you're refusing to explain to me why Delko's just dashed out of here?"

"He has a family emergency that needs to be dealt with, the rest of my team are more than capable of handling the rest of the evidence."

"Ah huh," Rick looked up and down the hall, resting his hands on his hips. "this family emergency wouldn't happen to coincide with the Duquesne family emergency you informed me of yesterday, for any particular reason, would it?"

"Are you intending to infer something, Rick?" Horatio did his best to keep his voice level and calm. Rick knew that he wasn't going to give them up. He'd let his own job suffer, before he sold out his team and Rick did respect him for that, he did, he just couldn't condone it.

"No," He held up his hands. "I'm inferring nothing. Just warning you," He lowered his voice. "don't take the fall for them, Horatio."

"I assure you, Rick," Horatio turned to walk away from him, throwing one last comment over his shoulder. "I have no idea what you mean."

Horatio left him standing in the center of the lobby, staring after him with a stern expression and a strong distaste in his mouth. Something strange was going on here and what had eaten at him the most, was the fact that with every monthly visit he'd made to the lab for the past five months, he'd seen hide nor hair of Calleigh Duquesne and he'd be remiss to say that that didn't trouble him.

* * *

_**I will be your hero, baby.  
I can kiss away the pain.  
I will stand by you forever.  
You can take, my breath away.**_  
~ _Hero_, Enrique Iglesias

* * *

Jumping down from the Hummer, Eric made his way as quickly as he could into the house. As soon as he opened the door he saw her standing there, her feet bare and wearing nothing but a pair of loose-fitting shorts and an over-sized grey sweater. Too many times in the last few months, had he looked at her only to realise with surprise how small she really was. She was so powerful, so bold and seeing her this physically and emotionally small, broke his heart. He dropped his keys onto the side table and he'd barely turned back to her before her arms were wrapped tightly around his waist and her face was buried into his chest.

He could feel her shaking slightly with tears and as that telltale warmth pricked at the corners of his eyes, he wrapped his arms around her.

He pressed his large palms soothingly to the back of her head. He ran his fingers along the smooth silk of her scarf and slowly he felt her tears abate, but she stayed wrapped in his arms. He tried to pull her away, so that he could see her face, but Calleigh held on tighter. She buried her face further into his shirt and he closed his eyes tightly at the strangled sob that sounded from her.

"Cal," He whispered, but she just held on tighter. Gently, he moved her arms from his waist to around his neck and with strong hands, he lifted her up into his arms, smiling into her shoulder as she wrapped her legs around his waist and let him carry her. He moved them into the livingroom, holding her carefully with his broad hands at her waist as he lowered the pair of them into the soft cushions of the couch, doing his very best not to break the embrace. As soon as he was down, Calleigh uncurled her legs, sliding them across his lap so that she could curl her whole body into his. It was only when holding her like that, that he really appreciated her size and how she fit so perfectly into his arms. So that he could hold her, all of her, and feel as though every inch of her was safe with him.

"Cal, what happened?" He questioned, placing a soft kiss at the corner of her eye.

"I think," She choked. "I think I told my Mom I didn't want her in my life."

"Oh, babe," He held her head as she wept into his chest again, shaking with sobs and small sounds.

"I was so horrible to her, Eric," She continued through her tears. "I just, let it all out and she looked so hurt and I just," She stopped herself, not honestly sure how she'd felt when her mother couldn't answer her. When her own mother, couldn't tell her if she was coming to her only daughter's wedding. And it had only made matters worse, when she'd awoken that morning to a low-fat muffin sitting on the corner of the kitchen counter with a brief note beside it. She hadn't mentioned anything Calleigh had spoken about the night before, she hadn't addressed it at all and worse yet, she wasn't there, when Calleigh left the house for her eight-thirty flight. She'd driven away from her empty childhood home as lost and alone as she'd felt that first time she'd driven away with everything she owned in the back of a rusty old truck, leaving an empty house for a crowded University where she could disappear for a while.

"What did you say?" He ran his fingers along her arm, content to sit there and hold her whether she answered his question or not.

"Nothing in particular," She kissed his chest. "everything that's ever bothered me. I gave her a choice, Eric, and I'm terrified that it's one i'm going to regret."

"Do you want to tell me what that was?"

She shrugged, closing her eyes as she focused on the feeling of his fingers along the bared part of her shoulder. "I told her she could come to the wedding, if she could accept how bad it was back then. If she could admit it. But Eric," She rolled her head back, resting it in the crook of his shoulder so that she could meet his eyes. "she didn't say anything. I asked her if she would come and she couldn't answer me. I'm just so scared that I went too far."

"But, Cal, you told her how you feel. How can she fault you for that?"

"You don't know her, Eric," She shook her head.

"No, but I know you. You wouldn't have said anything that wasn't true and maybe she was just stunned, scared or surprised that you were hurting so much. Maybe she'll see the truth or she'll call and she'll want to talk about it, you never know."

Calleigh smiled at the hopeful look in his eyes and patted her small hand against his chest, gently. "You're such an optimist, Eric."

He chuckled. "It's why you love me."

"Oh, well, it's one of the reasons I like you. I have other reasons why I love you." She grinned softly, burying herself further into his embrace and snuggling right down into his warmth. "This is one of them."

Eric kissed the top of her head, happy to hold her for th rest of the day if only he could. He didn't want to move, but he knew that if he didn't go back to work eventually, Horatio would be forced to stop looking the other way. There was only so far he could push the man, and staying away the whole day, spending it with Calleigh wrapped in his arms, was something Horatio was happy they shared, but wouldn't be happy he was doing instead of solving the case. He revelled in the moment for as long as he could, smiling at the small sounds Calleigh made as she drifted in and out of that sleepy state between awake and completely out. She wasn't sleeping and certainly wasn't trying too, but she was so comfortable and comforted after the tumultuous conversation with her mother, that she didn't want to move and hated it when he kissed her head again and told her he needed to get back to work.

"Will you take me with you?" Calleigh asked, slipping her legs off his lap and dangling her feet off the large couch, not even touching the floor.

"Cal, are you sure you want to go in to work?" He stood up, still holding one of her hands. "You've still got the day off, you can rest."

"I don't want to." She sighed, pulling herself to her feet. "I just want to be in my lab. I need to do something."

He nodded, pulling her towards him and holding her in a tight hug. "Alright, you go get dressed and I'll wait here."

* * *

**_It may sound absurd,  
But don't be naive.  
Even heroes have,  
the right to bleed._**  
~_Superman_, Five For Fighting

* * *

Rick watched her step off the elevator. She crossed the lobby and collected her messages, throwing him a curious glance before attempting to step past him. But he was quick, he stepped into her path, immediately stopping her and she looked up at him with a frown. She took a step back, clasping her messages in her hands in front of her as she stared up at him. She looked different, he noticed. And it wasn't just that she'd donned Jeans and a printed t-shirt as opposed to her regular professional suit. She looked thinner and tired and for a moment, he felt sorry for her. But whenever confronted by Calleigh Duquesne, he always felt intensely defensive. She had a skill in bringing that side out in him because her own defiance was always so raw, so justified and stunningly dignified.

"What do you want, Rick?" She questioned and he ducked his head, never able to dip his eyes low enough to meet hers if ever she refused to look at him. Which didn't happen often.

"You look different, Calleigh," He noted. "That's an interesting fashion choice." He pointed to her scarf and Calleigh's eyes darted across the lab.

"It's not a choice, Rick," She muttered and attempted to push past him. "I don't have time for this." She tried to head to her lab again, but his hand at her elbow stopped her and she spun back around, meeting his eyes for a moment as she now faced the doors of the elevator with him between her and every different choice of escape.

"I'm not finished talking to you."

"I'm not on duty today, Rick, so whatever you've got to say can wait until I am." She tried to turn, but he stopped her again.

"I just want to know what's so important that you feel you don't have to work as hard as the rest of your team?"

Calleigh's brow furrowed and her shoulders straightened. "Excuse me?"

"Your workload, Calleigh. You haven't been in the field for over two months, your name hasn't come up on any casework not related to ballistics and you just expect your teammates to pick up your slack, is that it?"

Calleigh narrowed her eyes, doing her best to fight off tears. "How dare you." She edged back, barely containing her fragile composure. She didn't need this. This kind of affront was the last thing she needed when all she'd come to the lab for was to bury herself in cold paperwork and hide in what she loved, waiting for Eric to finish with the case.

"How dare I? Miss Duquesne, rookies have closed more cases than you over the past few months and you're saying, how dare I? You should be surprised I haven't suspended you."

"You don't know what you're talking about, Rick." Her voice was suddenly small and while Rick did recognise the reddening at the corners of her eyes, he didn't stop.

* * *

Eric watched the numbers tick over on the elevator. He'd waited for a good few minutes down in the parking garage, doing his best to look as though they hadn't arrived together. He let her go before him, hoping that by the time he reached reception she would be in her lab and happy to be there, looking over her guns and her old cases. But as he stepped off the elevator, what greeted him was the last thing he'd expected and the very last thing he wanted to see that day.

"I don't know what I'm talking about? How about your teammates working overtime that they don't have because you're too busy taking time out for yourself. And you've been late to work more times this month than Delko has in the past year."

Eric saw her jaw clench as Stetler berated her. A part of him wondered if Rick would be treating her that way, if he had any idea what she was going through. But as far as he was concerned, Rick was a robot and a boring one at that. He didn't understand compassion. To him, he was a vessel that carried with him, reprimand, cruelty and a strong dislike for anything that stepped outside the symmetrical pattern of rules and guidelines that governed the little unreal world inside his head. Basically, anyone who outwardly respected Horatio Caine.

"You want to know what's going on with me?" He heard Calleigh blurt loudly, in that broken down, near to tears, voice. He knew he shouldn't have let her come in to work that afternoon. He should have encouraged her to stay home and sleep it off, but she was stubborn and he had so much trouble refusing her when she'd look up at him with those large green eyes and that saddened pout. He watched her, noticing how her hands shook and she pointed her chin defiantly to the sky. She was holding it together by a thread and he couldn't just stand there and watch that thread snap.

As he took a few steps towards them and noticed everyone around them had stopped to watch them as their voices raised higher, he feared that he may have been just a few seconds too late as her hand rose - as if in slow motion - and pulled her scarf from her head.

Eric stopped dead in his tracks.

Only at night, when they were alone in their bed with just the moon to light the room, did she ever remove her scarf. While she'd said she'd come to terms with it, he knew that she still wasn't comfortable with it considering she'd always been known for her long, sweeping blond hair. She'd always been known for that stereotypical beauty that looked so regular from far away, until you got up close to her and realised that there was so much more to her beauty than a first glance could do justice. He knew, watching her lips quiver in anger and frustration, that she had to have reached the end of her rope, to take it so far.

Rick was staring at her, not quite sure what he was looking at. She was bald, okay, but what did that mean to him? He cast his eyes across the hall to the surprised faces of the lab-techs, the men trying to look everywhere but at her and the women with hand's pressed to their mouths in stunned silence. He couldn't help but feel as though he was stuck in the center of a secret he was supposed to know. And he didn't like that. "What is this?" He questioned, lowering his voice and Calleigh arched pack.

"What is this?" She answered indignantly. "You come in here, accusing me of something you don't understand. You go over Horatio's head and berate me for the work he has approved for me. You have no _right_." Calleigh gripped the scarf tightly in her hand, letting her tears sound in her voice but not fall from her eyes. "I have been trying. I have been doing everything I can to continue to work and I didn't have to," She laughed bitterly in his face. "But you know, Cancer isn't a death sentance anymore, Rick. But heaven help you'd understand the agony i've gone through over these past few months. All you care about is your stupid protocols. We're not people to you, we're not real. You only ever see what you want to see."

Eric ran up to her side, grabbing the scarf from her hand and stepping between her and Stetler. He pressed the scarf to her chest, gripping her upper arm gently but firmly as she looked up in his eyes. "Cal, come on." He urged for her ears only, gesturing to her lab with his eyes and she relented slowly, glancing at Rick's rather flabbergasted expression over his shoulder as she ducked her head and slowly started to back up. "I'll handle this, alright," He smiled down at her and she nodded, suddenly feeling all of the eyes on her and wishing that she hadn't so hastily removed the one thing that helped her maintain her confidence.

"Again, using your coworkers to deal with your obligations." The IAB agent quiped without thinking.

Eric didn't know where it'd come from, but his first instinct was to swing around and knock the man out with a right-hook and before even realising that he'd moved, Eric could feel that hot sting across his knuckles as Rick tumbled to the floor. Rick clutched his jaw, staring up as Eric stood over him, his shoulders heaving and his nostrils flaring, looking down at Rick. It was then that he realised that he'd likely just made the most stupid, reckless decision of his entire career.

"Eric!" Calleigh shouted, gripping his arm from behind as Horatio appeared beside them.

"Eric, you need to back away." Horatio told him. Calleigh tugged on his arm, pulling him towards her lab as the crowd continued to grow. Even though everything else had blacked out all he could see or feel was the protective look in Horatio's eyes and the small hands trying to pull him towards the ballistics lab.

Horatio stood still, watching Rick slowly scrape himself up off the floor, holding his glasses in his hands and not lifting a finger to help the man stand. "I'm pressing charges." Rick wiped at the blood on his lip, pointing accusingly at the pair disappearing through the crowd.

"That'd be a mistake, Rick." Horatio answered in that calm, even tone.

"Is that so?"

"That's so."

Rick clenched his teeth together, taking a few steps backwards on his retreat to the elevator as he pointed at Horatio, licking his lip as it continued to throb. "I'll see that Delko's thrown off the force."

* * *

"Eric that was stupid, you shouldn't have done that." Calleigh whispered sharply, slipping into her stool as Eric took the scarf from her hand.

"I know." He answered, gently lifting the scarf to her head and carefully wrapping it, tying it below her right ear. He took a chance on laying a kiss on her forehead, but when Calleigh lent into him, he smiled against her skin and pulled her into his arms. "I'm sorry."

"Everything's screwed up, isn't it?" She sighed, grateful that he'd stepped in on the fight she was losing the energy to fight, but scared that he'd just made an annoying matter dangerously worse.

"No," The pair of them turned their heads to see Horatio standing in the door way, looking down at the floor. He crossed the room to them and while they each tensed, they knew that in his presence, the hold they had on each other didn't necessary have to fall away. Especially not right now. "it's not." He finished, looking up at them.

"He's going to press charges, H."

"But he's not going to win," Horatio smiled faintly, noting the scarf safely back on Calleigh's head, as he smiled kindly down at her. "I'm not going to let that happen."

"Horatio," Calleigh started, but with a gentle look, he silenced her.

"Here's what I want you to do. Eric, I'm going to put you on one week's suspension with pay. I don't want you to say anything to IAB without coming to me first and I'll deal with Stetler."

"What if I do get charged, H? As far as witnesses are concerned, I hit him without reason. It's not like he was picking a fight." Eric felt Calleigh's hand grip his and he looked down at her for a moment, sharing a glance with her.

"He was out of line, Eric, and I'm sure any witness will side with you on that. Go home."

He hesitated, looking between Calleigh and Horatio before he nodded slowly, tugging on Calleigh's hand until she stood. "I'm sorry, H." Eric said softly and Horatio nodded as he encouraged them to leave with a dip of his head. Calleigh brushed her hand along his forearm gratefully as they left and he smiled down at her, nodding his head and turning to watch them as they walked, hands apart until they reached the elevator and disappeared.

TBC.


	10. Chapter 10

Wow, guys, 100 reviews. You have no idea how amazed and touched I am by that. This story, has just become so close to my heart that every review has me grinning from ear to ear and I'm so grateful for all of the stories you've shared. Stories of your own pains and worries, your own heartache in regards to this terrifying disease. Thank you to everyone that is still reading this story, to everyone that has been touched by this story and to everyone who was candid enough to share with me, their own fears and experiences. It's an amazing world, fandom, where your life can be touched from all over the world, so simply by a common interest.

I appreciate all of you, so much. Thank you.

* * *

Being the master of typing on his keyboard using nothing but his two pointer fingers, Frank could relax back into his chair and listen to the slow, steady process of his own background check. He copped a lot of flack from his younger, faster working colleagues, but it was all in good fun and he knew they meant nothing by it. They were scientists, really - even if looking at them you'd never suspect as much - and they were meant to know their way around a computer better than he was.

He was a cop, first and foremost and what he did well, was notice the world around him. Listening closely, he heard the soft sound of a backside sliding across the edge of his desk until, with a quiet smile on his face, he heard her come to a stop just beside him. He'd recognised the distinctive sound of her heels before she sat, but he hadn't then worked out if her destination was his cubicle or if she'd intended to walk on by. But he found himself quite happy with the decision she'd made.

"I heard your guy slugged his way into a free holiday." He commented, not yet glancing away from the computer screen. He heard her sigh quietly and as he lent further back into his chair and slowly turned towards her, he saw the look in her eyes for what it was. Disappointment. In who, particularly, he wasn't quite sure. From what he'd heard, Eric had been defending her and the overzealous reaction towards Stetler had been a long time coming, she can't have been disappointed in Eric, could she? But then again, he was looking up at Calleigh Duquesne and he bit his lip, knowing decorum would have been more important to her, than Stetler finally getting his comeuppance no matter how well he knew she wanted that as much as the rest of them.

"There's nothing free about it," She smirked. "he's cleaning the bathroom, mowing the lawn. I have some things around the house that need to be repaired and," She raised her eyebrow cheekily. "if my Tulips die at any point this week, I'm going to torture him."

Frank chuckled, swivelling his chair from side to side and imagining Calleigh slowly shooting out every one of Delko's joints over the bed of dead tulips in her backyard. But then he stopped still, meeting her eyes with a serious expression in his own. "I heard Stetler had a few choice things to say to you, as well." He said softly and Calleigh nodded silently, casting her eyes down and he knew that bringing it up again likely hurt, but he needed to know that she was alright. Reaching out, he rested his large hand on her knee and was surprised when she curled her fingers around his against the fabric of her black dress pants.

"But I'm okay." She smiled, meeting his eyes again and even though she was breathing deeply to control her emotions, he knew that she wasn't lying. He was one of the few people that she never stretched the truth with, not even once, considering the rapport they'd developed pretty much the first day they'd met. She'd been short and pretty and fighting her way to the top with a physics degree, a gun and a sweet southern twang and he'd been an overthehill Texan short fuse with little patience for ill-minded pip-squeaks. He'd trusted her because Horatio had trusted her and she'd tempered him with sweetness and the ability to understand his more decidedly Southern sense of humour. If he were honest with himself, he'd admit she was one of the main things that had saved him from forced retirement several years ago.

"Well that's good." He patted her hand, letting go of her knee as she rested her hands on the edge of his desk on either side of her hips. "So, what can I do you for?"

Calleigh smiled gratefully for the change of subject, looking over to the profile still sitting open on his computer screen. "Well, I'm running the bullet through IBIS right now, I was just wondering if you had anything on our suspect."

"Couple of priors," He shrugged. "he was arrested for pick-pocketing and indecent exposure three years ago, paid a fine."

Calleigh nodded. "You think he's our guy?"

"I hope so," Frank chuckled and Calleigh smirked. "the little twerp stained my suit with that gas-can." He held his jacket out to show her, showing that it was hanging over back of his chair and Calleigh frowned, studying the oilstain smudged across the lapels. When they'd found their suspect, they'd discovered he was an employee for a local gas-station and upon greeting him and identifying himself, for his troubles, the man had thrown a gas-can in Frank's direction and proceeded to piss him off further by making him run the length of the street to catch him.

"You might want to get that drycleaned." Calleigh quipped, slipping off the desk with a smirk and patting his shoulder.

"Hey, you've got an in-house cleaner for a week," He joked and Calleigh laughed.

"He might be doing my laundry, Frank, but he's getting something out of it I'm sure you're not willing to give." She winked, turning on her heel and heading back the way she'd come, leaving him with his widened eyes and his stained shirt, chuckling to himself as he went back to work.

* * *

_**A brother shares childhood memories and grown-up dreams.**_  
~ Anonymous

* * *

Eric dragged himself up off the couch as the doorbell rang, dropping his dusting cloth onto the kitchen counter and immediately hoping - for the first time in their relationship - that it wasn't Calleigh at the door. Somewhere in the logical part of his mind, he knew it wasn't her. Mostly because it was her home and she didn't need to ring the bell, but also because she was at work, where he'd have been if he hadn't let his temper get the best of him. He'd spent the entire day completing chores she'd set out for him and he was starting to feel more exhausted than he ever remembered being at work. He had to laugh though, thinking that he'd never tired himself out with housework when he lived alone and it made him wonder just how rarely he'd cleaned his apartment.

"Just a sec!" He called, stumbling over the vacuum cleaner he'd left standing in the hall, because his attempts to clean anything were far more chaotic than hers. Considering she'd been able to clean the whole house without him ever noticing her lift a finger. He jogged down the hall, reaching for the handle and stepping back slightly in surprise at the faces that greeted him.

There was a woman with light brown, curly hair who stood a little taller than Calleigh, looking up at him with a wide smile on her lips and a small blond child on her hip. When he met her eyes, she seemed to be confused for a moment, glancing over her shoulder as a man even taller than himself with cropped blond hair, stepped up the path holding the hand of a small girl in a pink dress. "Ah, hello." He greeted and the tall man furrowed his brow before suddenly a look of realisation crossed his familiar features.

"Oh, you're Eric?" He questioned and Eric nodded, still not quite sure who this family was.

"I'm Wyatt," He held his hand out and Eric was finally able to smile as he shook his hand, realising who the man looked so much like. He was Duke Duquesne, only taller, younger and thinner. "I'm Calleigh's brother. This is my wife, Melissa and our kids," He pointed to the little one on his wife's hip. "this is Emily and this," He tugged on the hand of the older girl, encouraging her to smile politely at Eric. "this is Cora."

"It's nice to meet you," Eric nodded, still standing in the doorway and not even realising how confused he looked. Though he was grateful, when Wyatt moved up onto the step and addressed the question he knew was too rude to ask. Why they were there.

"We just drove down from Tampa. I wanted to surprise Calleigh."

"Right," Eric nodded, finally stepping back against the door to allow them access to the house. "sure, come in. She's actually at work right now." He watched them as they passed by, seeing Melissa set Emily down on the floor as he closed the front door.

"Well, we can get to know the infamous Eric Delko, then," Wyatt laughed, ignoring the playfully irritated look his wife threw over her shoulder as she ushered the children through the house.

"Do you mind if I take them to the bathroom, Eric?" She questioned and he nodded quickly, waving them down the hall.

"That's fine, it's just down there."

She nodded in thanks, coralling her children down the hall until the three of them disappeared into the bathroom. "You want a beer?" Eric asked and Wyatt nodded gratefully.

"It's good having you around already," The taller man commented. "Calleigh barely ever kept beer in the house."

The two men shared a laugh as Eric opened the refridgerator and tossed one over the counter. "So, you came to surprise Calleigh?" Eric questioned, resting his palm on the kitchen counter as he sipped his beer. Having never met anyone of Calleigh's family apart from her father, Eric had to admit that he was curious about the man. He was tall, which obviously, Calleigh was not and it got him to thinking what her mother looked like. But then he knew, being tall didn't always have something to do with your parents, considering he was a lot taller than his. He was broad-shouldered and seemed to be someone that Eric could find himself becoming fast friends with. The man smiled much like Calleigh did; that unguarded, completely joyful grin that he was starting to think they developed together as a way of fighting the troubles of their childhood.

"Yeah, she'd never ask us to come down, so we thought we'd just show up. I hope it's not an imposition."

"Nah," Eric chuckled. "I'm sure Cal will love it so I'm perfectly fine with it." Eric knew, on some level, that the man was sizing him up. He couldn't really blame him, considering he was doing the same thing but on the inside, it did make him laugh.

"Eric, the girls wanted to know if you had anything to play with," Melissa smiled, stepping under her husband's arm. "I told them that you probably wouldn't have any toys, but you know, they insist that I ask."

Eric chuckled, setting his beer down on the counter before stepping out of the kitchen. "Actually," He smirked, making his way into the livingroom to the two near-identical little girls that sat perched on the couch. "there is a playset just outside in the backyard, there are swings and a slide and everything." Eric grinned, sliding the back door open just in time for the girls to run screaming out through it.

"Playset, hey?" Wyatt commented in a curious tone and Eric caught the slap Melissa layed across his chest with the back of her hand.

"Yeah, I have neices. Calleigh had it put in after they completely massacred the bathroom with her lipstick and eyeshadow."

Wyatt snorted a laugh and Melissa slapped him again, causing Eric to snicker. "And here I was thinking you guys were preparing for something," Wyatt grinned, deftly side-stepping his wife's wayward backhand, causing her to glare at him, though stay where she was, because she was a guest and she would act like one in Eric's presence even though the scene they displayed was amusing him to no end.

"Well," Eric drew out the word, noticing how Melissa's eyes lit up hopefully before he knew he had to ease her excitement quickly. "maybe one day, we hope."

"Maybe sooner rather than later?" Wyatt questioned. "My Mom actually called me for the first time in six years, just to tell me." Eric nodded, knowing where this was going though still hurting for both Calleigh and now her brother, to hear they'd both suffered the same from their parents. "So, you and Calleigh getting married, hey?"

"Yeah," Eric breathed. "was kinda scared we'd never get here, but here we are."

"Deserves a bit of a celebration, don't you think?" Wyatt wrapped his arm around Melissa's shoulders, pulling her back into his chest as he grinned and Eric nodded, thinking over it.

"Yeah, I guess. I mean, we're kind of keeping everything quiet at the moment, only a few people know about it."

"But you have to have an engagement party," Melissa grinned. "why not use it as a way to sort of, spread the word?"

"Maybe," Eric nodded, wondering how Calleigh would feel about that. He'd wanted to share it with everyone the moment he'd asked and she'd finally accepted, but there was just so much to deal with and to add thousands of questions on top of the thousand _'How are you feeling_'s she already recieved every single day, was just too much to ask. She was happy and she was coping with how things were at the moment. Even though she was taking far longer to recover after every round of chemo these days, she was alright and he was happy to keep it at that until she was ready. She would be done with that course of chemo in just over two months and to his surprise when he actually thought about it, they'd be married in just over one and they could discuss their choices and her options together, after that. He knew that they needed to address the details of the wedding because with a little over a month to organise it. Calleigh wanted to do it before her chemo was complete, just incase her next screen came back with something more terrifying than she was already dealing with. So they didn't have much time.

* * *

"Calleigh," Horatio greeted as she stepped into his office and closed the door. "I heard you caught your guy." He smiled.

"Yeah, Frank's bringing him in just now." She nodded, pressing her hands together as she took a seat across from him. She didn't know why he'd called her into his office. As well as they got along and as greatly as she considered him a friend above being her boss, they could go full days without seeing each other, having faith in the work they were doing and the people they supervised. "You wanted to see me."

"Yes," He pressed his hands down on the desktop. "Calleigh, I need to know if you're up to having a talk with IAB?"

"IAB?" Her eyes widened. "Shouldn't Eric,"

He cut her off. "It's not about Eric." He took a deep breath. "IAB is investigating Rick Stetler." Her eyes widened and she sat back in the chair, licking her lips as she studied the wall to her left. "The thing is, questions have been raised on more than one occasion, that Rick has a rather persistant vendetta against this lab," Calleigh looked back to him, about to agree when he continued. "and due to the display in the lobby yesterday, many of the witnesses have spoken out on your behalf and that of this lab."

"Really?" She had to admit, she was a little surprised. For years, Rick had been out to find something to pin Horatio, herself and anyone else who seemed to err on their side of thinking. She'd stepped into his line of sight of her own doing, she knew, but she'd have been betraying herself and her beleifs if she'd stopped walking that lonely road with Horatio, as John had called it.

"The interviews are scheduled for next week, so I need to know if you're up for it. If not, we can organise for a written statement from you." He studied her with gentle eyes, through his lashes as he lowered his voice. "I've already spoken with the investigating officer and considering your circumstances, Calleigh, he's happy to make that compromise."

Calleigh nodded her head slowly, considering it carefully. She felt it had all gone on too far already, wishing she could just take the offer, write up her statement in her own time and head home to Eric. But she didn't want anything she may write to be construed the wrong way. "It's alright, Horatio, I'd like to speak to them in person."

"Well, no one is going to push you, Calleigh." He smiled kindly up at her. "You tell me when you're ready and I'll organise it."

"Thanks, Horatio." She smiled gratefully, standing slowly and nodding her head when she was sure he had nothing else to say. "So, I'll see you thursday?" She questioned.

"Yeah, I'll see you thursday."

* * *

_**Enjoy the little things,  
for one day you may look back and realize  
they were the big things.**_  
~Robert Brault

* * *

Calleigh tiredly stepped in the front door, dropping her handbag on the floor as she set her keys on the table. She could smell barbeque and she smiled, kicking her shoes off as she headed towards the kitchen to get a drink. She yawned, covering her mouth with her hand as she grabbed a water bottle from the fridge, setting it on the counter as she reached up on her tip-toes for a tumbler.

"Want me to reach that?" A voice breathed on the back of her neck and Calleigh shuddered, pressing her back into his chest as he reached past her for the glass.

"God I missed you today." Calleigh sighed, turning around and wrapping her arms around his neck, pressing against him for leverage so that she could reach his lips. "Stetler's under review, you know, they're taking statements next week." He grinned, half happy about what she was saying and half ignoring it in favour of looking down at her pink lips as he leaned in closer, ducking his head and accepting her kiss eagerly. When she yawned into his mouth, Eric chuckled and pulled her into an embrace, running his hands across her arms before he let her go to go back to pouring her drink.

He had questions about what she'd just said, but it was a conversation that could wait for later. Right now, he was intent on making her smile until it hurt. She deserved that.

"Hey, Cal," He started casually, leaning back against the counter. "You know how you love surprises?"

"No." She smirked, raising an eyebrow in his direction as she rested her hip against the counter. "Isn't your barbeque going to burn if you're not out there to watch it?" She attempted to change the subject, not realising that she'd stepped right into it.

"Actually," He swaggered towards her, reaching for her hips again. Leaning down to place a trail of kisses along her jaw. "that's your surprise."

"What?" Calleigh chuckled heartily. "A barbeque that cooks itself?"

Eric rolled his eyes and grabbed the glass from her. He set it down and pulled her out of the kitchen with by her hand, dragging her across the livingroom to the back doors and gently pushing her out onto the deck ahead of him.

"AUNTY CALLEIGH!" Two voices screamed in unison and Calleigh suddenly felt two sets of arms wrapped around her waist tightly. She smiled, happy to see them but the shock was evident on her face, at least to the adults.

"Hey little one." Wyatt beamed, waving a barbeque utensil as a gesture of greeting. He knew it was going to take Calleigh a little bit of time to adjust to the surpise before she would feel happy to offer hugs to them all, he could wait. He'd made it his life's work, making his sister comfortable as best he could.

"What are you guys doing here?" She looked up at Eric, but he raised his hands in surrender.

"It wasn't him," Melissa smiled, stepping out from her place at the table setting and pulling Calleigh into a quick hug. "we wanted to surpise you and spend some time with you, we know it has to be tough right now and we wanted to offer you some help, wherever you need it."

"Really?" Calleigh rasped, overwhelmed by the gesture.

"Aunty Calleigh, Aunty Calleigh!"

Calleigh looked down to Emily who was tugging on the sleeve of her jacket. "Yeah, sweetie?" She crouched down, making it easier to meet the child's eyes.

"We like Uncle Eric, can we come to your wedding to Uncle Eric?"

Calleigh laughed, pressing her hand to Emily's sweet little rosy cheek as she reached for Cora's hand. "Of course you can, honey. But you know what," She smirked, throwing a glance in Eric's direction. "Eric's from a place called Cuba, do you know it?" When the two girls shook their heads, she smiled. "Well, we're in Miami so if you crossed the ocean from here, you would come to Cuba and you know they they have a different name for Uncles in Cuba,"

"What do they call?" Cora asked inquisitively.

"An Uncle is a Tio. Can you say Tio?"

Calleigh hadn't seen the way Eric was gazing at her throughout the entire exchange, watching how she adored them. They were small and cute and blond with green eyes just like hers and he couldn't help but imagine her standing there, talking to their own little girl with a smile just as bright.

"Tio Eric!" They both screamed at the same time, bounding away from her, across the deck and over to Eric, shouting the new word they'd learn as though it was the most fascinating word in the world. Eric was beside himself, pulling Cora into his lap as Emily continued to dance around him, chanting his new title with glee.

"Well, you won them over again, little one." Wyatt snickered, pulling Calleigh into his side and placing a kiss to the top of her head. Not even mentioning the scarf or the bags under her eyes, how thin she felt in his embrace or how rasping her voice seemed to have gotten a couple of times in the last few minutes.

"It's good to see you, really." She looked up at him, genuinely grateful to see that familiar set of bright teeth staring down at her. Eric looked over to them, smirking at the way her brother seemed to be both gentle and rough with her at the same time and it made him think he'd have to start being more kind to his big sisters from time to time. "But I'm not little," She pouted. "I'm fun sized, right Eric?" She threw the question over her shoulder, not really knowing if he'd heard her at all, but the strangled cough was proof enough that he had and she knew, without doubt, that she'd just made his cheeks flush red.

She was happy, really happy. And as she wrapped her arms around her brother's waist, listening to Eric teaching the girls to sing a Spanish lullaby as she stole a chunk of burger from the hotplate with swift fingers, she grinned contentedly.

And she decided that she didn't feel as tired as she'd thought.

TBC


	11. Chapter 11

Hello guys, I just wanted to let you know that I probably won't be able to update over the weekend because I have a friend from Japan coming out to visit. But I promise that I'll write whenever I have the chance and I'll be updating as soon as I can. I hope this is alright to tide you all over, for the time being. *hugs* You're all still fantastic. And welcome to all of the new readers that have come out of hiding recently! You're lovely and I'm so grateful for the comments!!

Also, I made Melissa a ballerina. I couldn't _not_. It just seemed a part of her personality that I didn't want to part with, considering it's why she's in this story. It's why this story exsists. I hope you all enjoy.

*hugs again* I'll be thinking up new chapters while I'm snapping photos of Sydney, don't you worry.

* * *

Eric woke with the sun on his face, feeling the warmth of the glow against his cheeks as he rolled over, expecting to wrap his arms around Calleigh's sleeping form. But as his palm pressed down against the rapidly cooling sheets, he frowned and opened his eyes. Her pillow was still warm, the bed still smelt of vanilla and roses and he smiled as he rolled onto his back and listened to the shower shut off.

He listened to her padding around in the bathroom, smiling as he heard the soft sounds of the radio she kept on the vanity, speaking in that tinny voice about the weather in Miami and the traffic backed up on the causeway. He could hear movement from the other end of the house and he knew that the kids and either Melissa, Wyatt or both were already up. But after having known them and that their children were early risers for just over a week, he didn't feel obligated to move just yet, not like he had the first few days.

"You're up?" Her voice drew him back to the bathroom door, where she was standing there with a towel wrapped around her, rubbing lotion into her hands. He grinned, tucking his arm behind his head so that he could see her better.

"I am now," He smirked.

Calleigh laughed, making her way across the room with a beaming smile. She crawled back onto the bed, leaning against the pillows until their faces were inches apart. "Are you going to get out of bed?" She whispered, touching her lips lightly to the corner of his mouth before allowing him to reach up to her and pull her down to kiss him.

"Do I have to?" He pouted with her face in his hands.

"You do, I've got chemo today. I need you to drive me." She nuzzled his nose with hers, smiling against his mouth. He wasn't quite sure how she could be so upbeat, knowing what was coming to her that day and the days preceding it. What lay ahead for her was a few hours of sitting in front of a television or laying her head back listening to 80's power-ballads as she held on tightly to his hand, ignoring the drugs trickling into her body through a port in her chest. She'd be tired when she got home and likely, as had happened so many times in the past few months, she'd want nothing more than to go to bed and sleep for as long as she could, hoping that she wouldn't be awoken in the middle of the night for the need to dash to the bathroom.

"I was thinking," Eric watched his finger as he trailed it along her shoulder. "that maybe Wyatt might want to go with you today."

She sat back a little. "Really? You think?" She questioned and he smirked, watching the idea shuffling around in her head. She seemed to smile to herself, re-adjusting her towel as she nodded, nibbling on her lip. "You really think so?" He thought it was adorable, the way her brow creased like it did as she asked again. Reaching up to straighten out the frown lines, he smiled, taking her hand and kissing the back of her knuckles. "But what will you do all day?"

"Oh," He shrugged. "I'm sure Melissa and I can find something fun for the kids to do."

"Okay," She smiled. "yeah." She lent forward, pressing a kiss to his lips quickly. "But you're still getting out of bed."

"Aw, Cal." He whined, but she just laughed as she dashed into her closet.

* * *

_**Our life's a stage, a comedy:  
either learn to play and take it lightly,  
or bear its troubles patiently.**_  
~ Palladas

* * *

Wyatt hesitated as Calleigh climbed out of the car. He'd managed to get a parking space not too far from the front entrance, happy that when they came out they weren't going to have to walk too far. But for the whole drive, the closer they'd come to the hospital, his anxiety had been growing. He didn't know what to expect. He'd grown up with Calleigh as his strong, commanding big sister who, in spite of her size, protected him and defended him from primary to senior high. She was the one who'd sat on the stairs beside him with her short arm stretched as far across shoulders as she could reach. Holding him against her chest and protecting him from the shouting and the cursing and the fear that their parents could catch them listening.

She was 'little one' but she was always his rock. When he'd accepted her invitation to accompany her to her treatment, he hadn't expected to be so nervous. "You alright?" Calleigh questioned, sitting with her hands in her lap. It was then, that he noticed, she'd been waiting for him to get out of the car.

"Yeah, just," He cleared his throat. "what's it like? I mean," He stopped short and Calleigh smiled kindly, reaching over to take his hand into hers.

"It's not scary, Wyatt, I promise you. We're just going to go in there, we're going to sit for a few hours and we're going to go home." She sounded convincing, she did. But he couldn't help that there were bits and pieces that she was leaving out. She didn't say what they were going to do to her, she didn't say how it was going to feel, what he could do to make it better. She just looked at him the way she always had when he was the one that needed comforting. But he couldn't help but feel someone needed to tell her that it was her turn to be the comforted. She didn't have to be so brave.

But saying that would have been like telling the sun not to rise.

"Come on," She patted his hand. "let's go." He watched her climb out of the car, hesitating again until she looked at him through the windshield, smiling sweetly and rolling her eyes the way she used to at his stupid jokes. He nodded, finally opening the door and meeting her outside. He took the hand she held out for him, letting her lead him inside with a confident stride.

"Hey Calleigh," Wyatt smiled at the brunette in pink scrubs that greeted his sister while looking at him with curious brown eyes. "who's this? Don't tell me you've traded in that Cuban hunk-a-spunk." She winked and Calleigh laughed wholeheartedly.

"No, Eric's off with my sister-in-law and my nieces. This is my brother, Wyatt." Calleigh grinned, gesturing up to him. "Wyatt, this is Kelly, she's my nurse."

"_Your_ nurse?" The woman raised an eyebrow.

"Oh you know what I mean." Calleigh laughed.

The woman just shrugged with a smile, holding her hand out to shake with Wyatt's. "So, are we going for Katherine Hepburn, George Clooney or Pat Benetar?" Calleigh laughed at Wyatt's confused expression, pushing him to follow Kelly into the next room. He watched from the doorway as Calleigh set her bag down on the floor by a plush chair before slipping into it and undoing the top few buttons of her blouse. The nurse pattered around her and Calleigh encouraged him with a smile to move over and take the seat just beside her.

"How about you pick, Wyatt?" Calleigh offered, pointing to the pile of DVDs and CDs resting on the side table. She knew they probably wouldn't watch the movies at first. She hadn't had a real brother-sister conversation in a long time and for the moment, she had the energy to keep it up. But when one hour rolled into two, rolled into three, she knew she'd start feeling drained and her want for small-talk would disappear completely. She just hoped she could explain that to him before disappointment started to show on his face.

"Oh, I don't know," Wyatt shrugged. "anything."

Smirking up at Kelly, Calleigh nodded and the nurse rolled the tray of movies and music aside for now.

"Is this going to hurt you, Calleigh?"

She frowned, thinking about her answer. "Well, no," She bit her bottom lip. "it feels a little strange," She dipped her head around the nurse as she was carefully pulling back the bandage on Calleigh's chest, so that she could fit her IV line.

"Generally, we say that if she feels a burn or if it's a little cold, we need to know. But the treatments themselves, while the process doesn't hurt, the immediate and the lasting side-effects are what hurts." Kelly filled in, sensing that Calleigh's brother needed some kind of reassurance that his sister wasn't in pain. She admired that straight away, that same adoration she'd seen in Eric's eyes that first day he'd sat in the chair with Calleigh, holding her in his arms as she watched the television. She didn't talk that day, she recalled. Eric had done all the talking but she'd gathered from the way he cared for her, that there was something about the silent beauty that would be a loss to the world, if she didn't make it through this. Now seeing the same look reflected in her brother's eyes, she was sure of it.

"I just need you to sit with me, Wyatt. Eric and I talk for a while and then, we don't talk." She smiled softly, shuffling back in the chair as the IV started.

Wyatt watched the red liquid trickle down the tube, swallowing a lump in his throat as he crossed his arms over his chest. He wanted to distract her from it, talk to her about something interesting to pass the time, but that would mean he'd need to distract himself too and that was proving harder than he had thought. "Cora's in the school play." He blurted out and Calleigh grinned, reaching for his hand and pulling it into her lap. It wasn't Eric's chest at her back, but it would do this time around. A brother's love was just as good, it just came in different packaging.

"That's great."

"She's got a singing part too," He grinned proudly. "it's this assortment of nursery rhymes and verses that they're doing. Melissa's already made her costume, it's a giant yellow star." He chuckled and Calleigh found herself laughing a little too. "She even managed to en-corporate a little pair of canary yellow ballet slippers," He met her eye. "you know Mel."

"Yeah, I do. She was the best dancer in our class."

Wyatt rolled his eyes. "You know she'd say you were."

"Well then we're even." Calleigh nodded her head finally.

"Cora's got a really beautiful singing voice, you know. We've already had some practises in the living room. She sounds just like you at that age."

"Oh I feel sorry for her," Calleigh laughed and Wyatt found his eyes drawn to the IV again when she shuffled a little to get more comfortable, only to wince as she pulled it a little. "Happens every time," She commented off-handedly giving him the brightest smile she had. He just nodded nervously, trying his best to believe her. But her saying she was fine, these days, just had him doubting every word. Considering every thing he'd ever known about Cancer - which wasn't really a lot, he knew - was that you couldn't really be fine. Fine was just a word people used in the hopes that others would stop asking. What he didn't know - why would he? - was that on good days, Calleigh really did feel back to her old self. She'd tire faster and sometimes she'd feel a little woozy. But she felt good, great even. It was the other days that he'd seen depicted in characters in those tragic movies where families are torn apart by this horrible, invisible enemy, that he was afraid of. And he knew she had them, he could see it in Eric's eyes every time she'd turned down food even when it was just because she wasn't hungry.

"So," He shuffled in his chair, running his thumb along the ring rested on her finger. "marrying Eric, hey." Calleigh looked up at him, seeing that small, proud smile on his lips. It was the smile she'd seen that day she'd told him that she was moving out. He'd been disappointed that she wasn't going to be with him every day, but the joy he felt for her chance to finally break free had overshadowed any fears he had for himself. He could handle himself with his parents, he had strength on his side when they became just a little too physical with their arguments. It was Calleigh he'd always thought deserved the better life.

"Yeah," She breathed.

"Wanna tell me about him?"

Calleigh furrowed her brow. "Wyatt, you've spent the past week in our house, you know Eric."

"Yeah," He smirked. "but I don't know what he's like to you. I know he's a good guy, has great taste in beer, and Emily and Cora like him. But I wanna know how he treats you, why you want to marry him."

Calleigh looked down at her hands, biting her lip as she tried to find the right words. She wanted to find the right reference that could show her brother, how she felt for Eric. "You know, I met him about twelve years ago. He was in underwater recovery and Horatio had him help out on a case, he was really good so he got a place on the new team. He made me laugh that first day," Calleigh laughed and Wyatt smiled at the way her whole being had brightened, just talking about Eric in the simplest way. "he asked for my number and I laughed in his face. But you know, that didn't stop him asking every day for a week."

"Why didn't you give it to him back then?"

"I did," She grinned. "but by that time we were friends and it just didn't sit right with either of us anymore. So he was my friend and we went out for pizza with Speedle, we went to baseball games and he watched me date the worst choices in guys. But he was there," She sighed. "he was always there. I'd yell at him or I'd curse him, but when I needed him, he was always there no matter what. He was just a friend and then one day, it was like a switch was flicked and we looked at each other and we realised that there was something there." She slunk back further into her chair, weaving her fingers with his as she looked up to the ceiling. "And then I just stopped fighting him. He knew, even before I did."

She chuckled softly and Wyatt just held her hand, listening to every word intently.

"It's only a shame it took us so long, you know?" She turned back to look into his eyes. "I mean, we've known each other for twelve years and we've only been together for one. Took us three near-death experiences and this," She gestured to the IV tube and her own head. "to make us see that life's too short to dance too long."

* * *

Melissa watched from the park bench as Eric walked down the beach with her daughters holding on to each of his hands. She'd never seen them take a shine to someone so quickly and though she put it down to his natural comfort with children and knowing others just the age of her daughters, it did make her smile as though there was something magical happening there. They liked him from the moment they'd met him and she felt that that quite possibly could have been the way Calleigh had felt too. He had a casual charm about him that seemed to be accidental and she thought it suited Calleigh's perpetual cheer, just nicely.

She and Calleigh had always been in the same ballet class together. All through high school they'd competed together in gymnastics, bouncing back and forth almost as though they were taking turns at winning. That's how she'd met Wyatt, after all. Being just that little bit younger than Calleigh, Melissa had caught her brother's eye and she liked to think that their future had been set in that moment. She already looked at Calleigh like the sister she'd never had, so it was an easy transition, really. Watching Eric playing in the sand with her girls, burying Emily up to her neck with her hands and feet just poking out, she knew that the case was the same for him and Calleigh.

She knew there was history there. Calleigh'd worked in Miami for twelve years and she was sure she'd heard the name Delko a few breif times over the years. Usually accompanied by 'Speedle' or 'Horatio' or 'did the most annoying thing you can imagine'. It made her laugh. And it made her immensely happy for her sister-in-law.

"You gonna come and play?" Eric called and Melissa tossed her finished ice-cream stick in the trash before making her way over to them. Looking down at Emily with a frown and her hands on her hips.

"I think you've lost something, Em." She smirked.

"What's that, Mommy?"

"Your body, sweetpea. Tio Eric seems to have made it disappear."

"That's because he's a magician!" Cora beamed triumphantly, waving her arms in the air, to which Eric just shrugged nonchalantly, trying to pretend as though it was a secret that was going to get out eventually.

"Well ask nicely if he can make it reappear because the sun is going down, we've got to get back to Aunty Calleigh's for dinner."

Melissa stood back and watched Cora and Eric drag Emily out of their sand-castle with little finesse. But the smaller girl didn't seem to mind one bit. She was happy and laughing and covered in sand. She knew she wasn't going to be able to get all of the sand out of her little jeans for weeks, but the smiles on their faces was worth it. It got her to thinking about Calleigh's future with this adorable man and it gave her an idea, just to give it a bit of a kick-off.

"Eric," She spoke softly, not excluding the girls but ensuring they knew she was talking to the adult.

"Yeah." He grinned, patting himself down, trying to dust all the sand off as they walked.

"Would you mind if Wyatt and I threw you guys an engagement party?" He opened his mouth, but she raised her hands to silence him for a moment. "I promise you, we'd only invite those you want us to because I know Calleigh's probably not up for large parties right now. But I just thought it'd be nice, if we could do something like that for you. I've always thought of Calleigh as my sister and she's just so happy with you, I want to do this for her."

Eric grinned, noticing how she'd barely breathed between sentences. He laughed, resting his hand on her shoulder reassuringly. "We can check with Calleigh, but I'm sure she'd love that."

"Really?" She beamed. "Fantastic!"

* * *

Eric stood just outside the doorway to the kitchen as he watched Wyatt leading Calleigh back through the door. She had her sweater tugged around her and her arms crossed over her chest, she was smiling, but he could tell she was exhausted. "Hey," He kissed the top of her head as she reached for him, wrapping her arms around his waist and sinking into his chest with a heavy sigh. "how'd it go?" He asked sweetly and she nodded, kissing his bicep as he hugged her tighter.

"I'm just really tired."

"You up for any dinner? I've made Lentil Dahl for the adults, grilled cheese for the little people."

Calleigh laughed softly, smiling as she rested her head in the crook of his arm. "Maybe a little later, I'm just going to go to bed for a while."

Eric looked over the top of her head, meeting Wyatt's eyes. He smiled kindly, seeing how exhausted the man looked and he knew how he felt. He'd felt it so many times recently. He'd sit with Calleigh the whole time, sometimes he'd hold her, sometimes he'd read to her. Sometimes they'd watch stupid daytime soaps and sometimes, he'd shut the door so that she could cry quietly, just between the two of them. He knew how tough it was, how it broke his heart to see her like that and he could imagine Wyatt's point of view from his own experience with Marisol. He hadn't decided which was harder, to watch your sister or to watch your lover, but he knew that the choice didn't have a right to exsist. It wasn't fair on either of them.

"Guys, I'm just going to take Calleigh to bed." He looked to Melissa and Wyatt who were standing on the other side of the kitchen counter. They smiled tightly, nodding and Melissa's hand raised to Wyatt's as he wrapped his arms around her from behind, needing to hold her for a moment, just to feel grounded. They watched Eric lead Calleigh down the hall, his hands pressed to her shoulders as he followed her.

***

Calleigh stood by the bed as Eric pulled back the blankets. He guided her to sit down and lowered himself to his knees to remove her shoes carefully, touching his fingers along the arch of her foot with a smile as her toes twitched. She giggled tiredly, pulling her feet up onto the bed before reaching out to him, pulling him into the bed with her. "Shouldn't I get back out there?" He questioned, brushing his fingers along her brow as she settled into the cushions.

"They can handle themselves, Eric, just hold me a little while, please." He smiled, dropping a kiss to her temple.

"Alright," He whispered. Wrapping his arms around her waist he lay himself down on the bed, pulling her into his chest. "hey, you know what?"

"What?" Calleigh rolled over, laying on her back so that she could see his face. He pulled the blankets up, wrapping them tightly around her as she snuggled closer.

"Melissa has offered to throw us an engagement party."

Calleigh smiled widely, glowing just a little brighter for a moment as she tiredly blinked. "That'll be perfect." She breathed out and Eric chuckled as she drifted off to sleep, dropping her face into his chest.

TBC.


	12. Chapter 12

Hello everyone, I'm back. I had a great time with my friend and she's gone on to New Zealand now. We took photos of the mountains and walked the steep stone steps to "The Three Sisters" (I seriously don't recommend that if you're not a strong walker, it nearly killed us.) Walked Darling Harbour, the Rocks and Circular Quay and took photos of the Harbour Bridge and the Opera House, all fun things. Had chocolate strawberries for lunch, because I kid you not, if you ever go to The Rocks Markets, the chocolate strawberries are the best in the world! Seriously, chocolate strawberries on a stick, you can not go wrong. And now, I'm back and I'm writing again. So I hope this was worth the wait!

More will come soon.

* * *

Melissa sat on the couch with the phone reciever in her hand as Wyatt saw Calleigh and Eric out the door. It was the first day they'd had since arriving in Miami, that both Calleigh and Eric were heading off to work. She was happy that they'd had so much time to see Calleigh so far and get to know Eric but knowing that they were going to have the day completely to themselves, had her excited to start planning. She knew that Calleigh wouldn't be up for all that much, considering how much more tired she'd been lately. The Chemo was certainly taking it's toll and she was proud, if a little surprised, that the woman had the strength to get out of bed every day let alone go off to work. She had faith that Eric watched over her and from what she'd heard, their boss was as careful with her as the rest of them.

Grabbing the small note Eric had left by the phone, she raised her eyebrow with a smirk to her husband as she quickly dialed the number. She watched Wyatt as he took a seat on the plush lounge-chair in front of her, dragging a newspaper into his lap as he looked out the back doors to their daughters playing happily on the swings. The phone was ringing and she could see Wyatt's amusement in his smile because he knew what she was up to, he'd overheard her speaking to Eric that morning about wanting to throw the party, but needing help from a very unlikely source.

_"Hello,"_

"Oh, hello," She smiled as someone picked up the phone. She winked at him and he rolled his eyes. "my name is Melissa Duquesne."

"_Duquesne, that's either a strange coincidence or you are some relation to our Calleigh._" The kindly, accented voice of the woman on the other end of the line spoke with a smile in her voice.

"Yes, Duquesne and," She laughed. "It's no coincidence. I am Calleigh's sister-in-law and I was wondering, would I be speaking to Carmen Delko?"

_"That would be me, dear, what can I do for you?"_

"The thing is, I'm wanting to host an engagement party for Calleigh and Eric and I was wondering if it wouldn't be too much of an imposition if I called on you and your daughters for a little help. Eric's told us so much about you and your glorious cooking that I just felt it would be a wonderful idea if we could all do this together, for them."

_"That sounds marvelous, Melissa. Of course, you can count on myself, Ana and Maria. We'd be honored to help out with anything you need. And we'd certainly love to meet some of Calleigh's family. I have to say, It was a pleasure to meet your father-in-law, dear, and it will be a pleasure to meet you, I'm sure."_

Melissa chuckled. She was liking this woman already. "Alright then. Is there a chance that we would be able to meet sometime later today?" She watched Wyatt out of the corner of her eye, as he made his way into the backyard to play with the girls. "Because I have a lot of plans and there is a lot to do. I'm hoping to hold the party this weekend considering, as you know, the wedding is next sunday and many of Calleigh and Eric's friends don't even know it's happening yet."

_"Yes,"_ Melissa could hear the frown in the older woman's voice_. "My son does have a dedency to leave things to the last minute and I can certainly understand why it's not the first thing on Calleigh's mind, my poor Mija."_ Melissa smiled at the endearement Eric's mother bestowed upon Calleigh. She'd learnt a few spanish words from Calleigh over the years and even though she'd never been great at holding a firm grasp on other languages, the way Calleigh had with Spanish, French and German in college, a few words here and there, stuck in her mind. Like the colloquial term 'Mija' meaning 'My Daughter'. "_Well, have you ever been to Little Havana?"_

"Actually, I haven't." She smiled.

"_Well then, I know a wonderful cafe just down from my home. I'll give you directions and my daughters and I will meet you there for lunch, how does that sound?_"

"It sounds great."

* * *

"Miss Duquesne, your Lieutenant has informed me that you are unwell, so I'll do my best to keep this brief." Calleigh nodded silently, scratching her fingers across her brow to fight a small swirl of nausea that caught her for a moment. She ran her fingers down the hem of her red scarf, trying her best to distract herself for a moment as she breathed deeply. The agent watched her, trying to respect her space for the time it took her to gather herself. He hadn't met her before, but from what her colleagues had already said about her in his interviews earlier in the day, he was starting to see that she hadn't deserved the treatment she'd recieved from a man he'd started to feel ashamed to have worked so closely with for so many years.

"Thank you," She answered firmly, raising her chin and setting her forearms on the table as she clasped her hands together. "so you have a few questions for me?"

"Yes," He cleared his throat. "how would you describe this lab's relationship with Agent Rick Stetler?"

"Well," Calleigh studied her fingers, absently counting the diamonds around her ring and regretting that she hadn't thought to slip it into her pocket before the interview had begun, so as to avoid any unneccessary questions about it. "in the past he has been fairly hostile in his investigations against us. We have managed before, to prove ourselves as a reputable lab, but he has been intent on finding something to shut us down."

The officer made a few notes and Calleigh frowned, watching him. "A few of your colleagues have made formal complaints against him for his actions towards you, just last week, can you comment on the nature of that?"

Calleigh took a deep breath. "Agent Stetler had questions in regards to my shortened work hours and the work I've been doing throughout my illness. He wasn't aware of my condition and since it hasn't been a burden on the efficiency of the lab, my supervisor Lieutenant Caine, felt that it wasn't necessary to inform him. I know that Officer Delko's reaction was wrong, and I don't condone it at all. But he was defending me and I am grateful to him for that."

"And of the claims Agent Stetler has in regards to your relationship with Officer Delko?"

Calleigh swallowed, pulling her hands down into her lap. "I don't see how that's relevant to this."

He levelled his full attention on her. "Miss Duquesne, I'm sure that you can see how Officer Delko's actions would call your relationship with him into question."

"Officer Delko has been one of my closest friends for over ten years. As overzealous as his reaction was, I don't see how it implies anything because I'm sure he would have had the same reaction were it CSI Wolfe or Boa Vista." She edged back a little, frowning. "I am an engaged woman and I don't feel that prying into my private life is relevant to this case." She knew her voice had shaken a little and she knew she was stepping out on a very precarious ledge by calling attention to her engagement. If she made a misstep, he'd call her on her it and questions about just who her fiance was, would have her found out. But she was exhausted and her body was aching. She felt sick and dizzy and since arriving at work, to Horatio and the knowledge that interviews were being conducted that morning, she'd wanted nothing more than to go straight back home. "Rick Stetler has wanted nothing more, over the past few years, than to find fault with the way we run things here. Either it's personal between him and Horatio or not, it's got nothing to do with my relationship with Eric Delko, whatever that may be."

"But surely, you can see how it could be construed as suspicious."

Calleigh nodded, suddenly feeling a little more nauseas than she had a moment ago. "I can," She swallowed. "but I don't expect you to understad the close family relationship that this team shares, and it is not what's in question here. What is in question, are the actions of Agent Stetler."

"Well then," He packed up his files, stacking them in a pile and resting his hands on top. "then my final question is, I suppose, are you going to be pressing charges against Agent Stetler?"

"No," Calleigh shook her head vigorously, immediately regretting it as the world spun for a moment. "I just want this to be over and done with. Will you excuse me," She stood, bracing herself against the table to stop from falling over right there. She blinked a few times, noticing the worry in the man's dark eyes and realising that he was only doing his job. It eased her a little, to think that this sudden change in her demeanour had altered his so significantly and she found it easier to breathe for the few moments that she stood in front of him. "I'm sorry," She frowned, rubbing at her brow. "I need to go."

"Are you alright, Miss Duquesne?" He questioned, jumping up from his side of the table to take her arm into his hands, guiding her gently to the doorway.

"Yes, I'll be fine. I just need some fresh air and a glass of water, I can get those on my own."

"If it's any consolation, Miss Duquesne, these questions have been a formality from the start. Our records indicate a significant lack of professionalism on the part of Agent Stetler for some time. This investigation is protocol, nothing more." She met his eyes then, focussing closely and the spinning room almost completely came to a stop. "Of course, many of the regulations that have come into play over his time here, were set by the department and will remain enforceble. The regulation regarding fraternization between officers, for example." He inclined his head, pressing his lips together as she eyed him carefully. "Just so you know." The corners of his mouth tipped up just a little, but Calleigh managed to keep her expression impassive. It wasn't difficult, considering she was worried more about throwing up on his shoes than smiling over the fact that he knew, but it seemed he had no intention of saying a word.

"Well, that's good to know." She ground out, stepping away from his hold and out the door, making her way quickly to the elevator so that she could get outside for that well-needed breath of fresh air.

She'd wanted the interview conducted face to face and she thought that she was up to it. But as she sucked in heaving breaths, stepping out onto the front steps of the crime lab, she knew that she could have been more composed had she waited until later in the week. She'd seen Natalia come out of her interview a little worse for wear and could only imagine what he'd asked of her. Of everyone, Natalia was in the most likely position to have shared opinions with Stetler and Calleigh wondered if Natalia's strong opinions contradicting his, had a hand in his downfall at all. And she should have taken Natalia's shaken appearance as a que that she just wasn't quite up to it yet. Being strong and defensive was something she was good at, when her head was entirely in it. But she didn't really care about that now. She slipped down to sit on the steps, one knee pulled up into her chest and the other leg stretched out ahead of her as she took deep calming breaths.

She'd be okay, she just needed to stop worrying about what she and Eric were going to do about the regulations, if Stetler was still going to press charges against Eric and on a more trivial note, when she was going to find the time in the next week to straighten out her life and choose a wedding dress.

* * *

_**The most important thing in illness is never to lose heart.**_  
~ Nikolai Lenin

* * *

"Hey," Eric dropped his evidence on the counter-top as he rounded the bench to Calleigh. She smiled wanely, turning on her stool and letting him place his hands to her hips, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "Ryan said he saw you run outside after your interview. Are you alright?"

"Yeah," She brushed off his worry, running her hands over his shoulders with a soft smile. "it was just a little warm in there and I wasn't feeling well. I'm alright now, Eric, I promise you." She secretly liked how, whenever she seemed to have a moment of weakness, she could count on Eric coming running as soon as he possibly could. This time, eyeing the evidence bag he'd dropped on his way in, she knew that he'd snagged this little visit under the guise of having her analyse a bullet or, by the size of the bag, a weapon of some sort.

Having his arms around her was the first thing she'd wanted when the nausea had abated but he'd been out on a case and calling him would have been a little excessive. She'd felt sick for months, she'd been numb and in pain and she'd had days where getting out of bed was the most agonizing thought she'd ever had. A little dizzy spell and her stomach doing an awkward flip after a few uncomfortable questions was nothing compared to that.

"Are you sure?" He questioned, dipping his head to meet her eyes and she smiled, brushing the back of her fingers down the side of his face.

"I'm sure. Look, Eric, we need to talk."

"What about?" He grabbed the nearest stool and dragged it up beside her, surprising her when he set his full attention on her. She blinked, and dropped her hand to his knee for a moment as she thought. She licked her lips, smiling to herself as he took her hand and then looked up to him again. "Cal," He pushed and she nodded.

"I think I should quit."

His eyes flew open wide. "What? Cal, no." His first reaction was defensive. "Calleigh, you can't," He spluttered, grabbing for her other hand, but she pulled it away. "why?"

"Because the fraternization regulations are not going to go away just for us, Eric and we're getting married in a week, we can't go on like this." As much as he hated to admit it, she was right. After next week, they weren't going to be able to hide their relationship anymore. There would be a marriage certificate, they'd have a marriage license. All of which would be public record. They needed to do something if they wanted to avoid losing, through reviews and charges and possible loss of pension, the happiness they'd found.

"But you can't quit, you're the best at what you do in the entire state of Florida, Calleigh." He was right too. As much as she hated to draw attention to it, she was the one who proved it time and again. But she was also stuck on the fact that she was sick and she may never recover. Eric feared she'd become far too comfortable with the idea of that but she put it down to being realistic.

"Eric, I'm not doing my job in the best way that I can. I just think that if we're going to do this; If we're going to get married and be a family, it's time for me to give up playing the hero." Eric chuckled and Calleigh stared at him, confused. "What?" She frowned. "why are you laughing?"

"Because you _are_ a hero, Calleigh," He chuckled a little more, softly. "you don't have it in you to just, stop."

Calleigh pulled her other hand from his, twisting in her stool to pull away from him as far as she could. She turned away from him, reaching across the bench for the evidence he'd dropped there, attempting to change the subject as she pulled it in front of her. "I think we should talk about this tonight. What's this evidence you've brought me?"

"Cal, if anyone is quitting, it's me."

"Eric," She sighed and dropped what she was doing. "you can still do your job. I can't,"

He grabbed her hands, forcing back to look at him. She silenced, stunned by the force of his hands pulling her back to him, but feeling safe in the gentleness of his touch. "You can do your job. This cancer is a moment in time, Cal, one moment and we're going to look back on it as a distant memory."

"You don't know that, Eric."

"I _beleive_ that. That's all I need."

Calleigh turned her eyes away, trying to hide that fresh tears had formed there. "Belief isn't going to make it go away, Eric."

"Wouldn't you rather beleive and hope because it makes smiling each day worthwhile, or cry and hide and give up?"

"I'm not giving up." She protested with wide, reddened eyes.

"No," He smiled softly, reaching to touch her cheek. "you're not giving up on life. But Cal, if you quit, you're going to give up what you love to this thing. You can't give it what it wants, you can't let it break you."

"You say that like it's a monster."

"It is, Cal," He nodded. "it's a big, scary monster and you're going to beat it."

Calleigh shook her head. She wanted to believe him. She wanted to believe that she had it in her to look at it in the same way that he could, with that almost childlike innocence that could reduce anything to a battle between good and evil, with good being the victor every single time. She wished that she could draw strength from that, more than just the support that he gave, but the strength of will that he offered to her every single time he presented her with those glittering smiles and the happy, hopeful honesty in his belief that she'd make it through. He was realistic too, she knew that he understood what was going on, inside and out. They'd sat there all night, reading about her illness on the internet the day she was diagnosed. She'd fallen asleep in his arms and he'd kept on reading, finding every shred of hope he could that might save her. But he had a strength of belief in her that she just couldn't understand. It made her heart soar and weep at the same time because she wanted so badly to measure up to him and she couldn't, not when faced with a foe that was fighting her from the inside.

Eric watched her internally fight with herself and he too, was thinking over what they could do to avoid the trouble they'd face if any kind of authority above Horatio, found out about them. Frankly, he'd been thinking about it since he'd walked into the jewellery store months ago, to buy her ring. He'd been running solutions through his head for months, trying to think of a way to ensure neither of them would lose what they loved the most, beside each other and there had only ever been one solution that had made sense to him. He hadn't wanted to bring it up just yet, having not wanted to give up his career either, but the worry in her eyes had him deciding that the time had finally come.

"Calleigh," He edged closer and she looked into his eyes. "I've been thinking about this for a while and I think that if either of us is going to quit, it needs to be me." She opened her mouth to protest, but he held his finger to her lips to silence her. "it's true, Calleigh, you're more valuable to the team than I am and we both know that. You're not going to be happy, working in a shooting range or keeping house, Cal. At least, if I quit, I can still dive."

"But you love the lab, as much as I do." She frowned.

"Well," He smiled. "that's true, but I would still be content if I was running tours of the reef, as long as I have you."

She smiled softly, imagining him with a little boat painted with bright colours and a company name made up by his neices. It made her happy, imagining that that quieter life could make him happy and she wished she had the will to slow her pace like he did. But they both knew she didn't. She loved him and she wanted to marry him but he was right, she wasn't going to be happy living a quiet life. She couldn't sit at home and see deaths on the news, without wondering what she could do to bring justice to the victims. She was too connected to the life that she loved and he was too in love with her to ask her to give it up. "You would really do that?"

"I thought about doing it long before I met Horatio, it was always a little dream to own my own scuba business. I've certainly dived down there enough to know what i'm doing." He smirked and Calleigh nodded, though she was feeling a little guilty that he was so readily willing to give so much up for her. "Getting married, settling down is as good a reason as any, to try something I've always wanted to do. I can leave the crime fighting to you."

"Eric, I just feel so,"

He cut her off. "Don't feel guilty, Cal. I want to do this. It'll be good for us." He squeezed her hand. "I'll talk to Horatio today, okay."

She hesitated, taking a shuddering breath. "Okay."

Eric stood, moving closer to her until he was standing between her knees, looking down at her. She wrapped her arms around his waist, kissing his chest before tilting her head back to meet his eyes. "This going to be good for us, Cal, I promise."

"I believe you, Eric."

TBC.


	13. Chapter 13

Fair warning: Chapters with an over-abundance of characters are _not_ my strong suit, so apologies in advance, if this doesn't flow all that well. I wrote, re-wrote and re-worked this chapter a few times over because it seemed so very OOC or awkward, then it seemed cheesy and then it seemed _okay_. I am proud though, that I think I've covered everyone in this chapter and I even remembered Frank at the very last minute (phew, I don't know why I initially forgot him, but hey, I forgot Alexx in the first draft too, _so_ he shouldn't feel so let down.) Anyways, I think this draft has turned out the best and I really, really hope that you all enjoy it!

Not too long until the wedding now! And I've still got a few surprises up my sleeve. But we're going to stick with the fluff for the moment, I think.

Enjoy.

* * *

From the front door to the back fence, Calleigh and Eric's house was decorated for a celebration. The back patio was adorned with flowered garlands, they had tables covered by cool champagne tablecloths decorated with centerpieces the children made with the help of _Abuela_. Calleigh's nieces had immediately connected with Eric's and the five small girls squealed with excitement from the pool filled with floating plastic lilies. The kitchen was on fire with the smell of spices and the warm scent of roasting pork wafting in from the backyard where Pavel was standing over the rotisserie. The tables in the yard surrounded a small dance-floor and people were slowly creeping in through the back gate where Eric's cousin, Ade, was playing the greeting host.

The kitchen was filled to the brim with women, all fussing over a different task and being joined by more women as Eric's Tia's arrived, as Alexx ushered her children off to supervise the younger ones in the pool and Natalia did her best to hide from any form of cooking whatsoever. Considering that cooking and domesticity were not things that Natalia held in high regard, Eric did notice with a chuckle, that she took his mother's instructions graciously. Carmen Delko had an eye for those that were less adept in the kitchen and while she'd immediately set a complicated task for Alexx, who dived in without resistance, Natalia was asked kindly, to carry the finished salads from the kitchen out to the tables.

The men were reclining against pillars and posts in the backyard, resting beers in one hand with the other in their pocket as they all chatted about anything and nothing, as Ryan stacked another case of beers in the coolers and the rest of the men were comparing their cooking prowess to Pavel's and laughing when he accidentally tipped his beer over the roasting pig. He merely chuckled, saying that it'd only make it taste better anyway. Frank wholeheartedly agreed, even suggesting that he pour on a little more.

With Carmen, Melissa, Ana, Maria, Alexx and Eric's aunts in the kitchen, with Natalia running interference, the men avoided them by taking a path through the living-room if they needed the bathroom or extra towels for the sopping-wet children. Each time he crossed the room, Eric cracked a joke, but when the third bread roll hit him in the head, the thought of Calleigh killing him over a stained rug scared him into changing his tactics. Calleigh was out with Wyatt because she knew there was going to be a party, but the sheer size of the celebration was being kept from her as best it could.

Under the guise of wanting to spend some time with his sister, Wyatt had taken her out to lunch and a movie. She had no idea what was coming, but she knew that she and Eric were going to be letting all of the secrets out, that night. Natalia and Alexx were the only ones that knew about their engagement but with as much as they knew, they weren't aware of the other secret Horatio had been informed of, just the day before. So it was secrets all around and they were going to come clean just a week before the wedding. They were leaving it so late, that it had bothered Calleigh and Eric knew that. But the opportunity had never presented itself, until time had run out.

Eric had been swimming with the children, keeping himself as far out of the way as possible but as the time drew nearer and the backyard filled to crowded with family and friends, he dragged himself out of the pool and disappeared into the bedroom to change.

_The morning was cool and slow and Calleigh awoke to Eric's warm eyes staring down at her. She'd roused with the feeling of supple lips pressed to her eyelids and she'd grinned, feeling the warmth of his breath against her face. "Morning," He whispered, running the tips of his fingers along her brow with an adoring smile. Calleigh catalogued those moments, where they could wake up together without worrying about racing off to work, racing off to the hospital or Calleigh's temperamental stomach launching her out of the bed at an ungodly hour. She snuggled herself into his side as he rolled over, moving closer to her. "did you sleep well?" He questioned and Calleigh nodded, closing her eyes contentedly as she stretched and released a soft sigh._

_"I wish I didn't have to get up." Calleigh whimpered, clutching the fabric of his shirt and kissing his bicep as she rolled into him._

_"But you have to," He laughed, running his fingers from their place against her temple, down the side of her face and across the dip of her throat. He pressed a kiss to the swell of her breast and she smiled, holding the back of his head in her hand and feeling that his actions were only proving her point. The point that getting up was the very last thing either of them would enjoy that morning. "you have to get up if you want this party to happen."_

_"Does it have to be right now?" She questioned, arching herself into his kiss just a little as he chuckled._

_"No," He laughed, continuing his hot trail of kisses up her neck, paying special attention to the spot just behind her ear. "but it'll be soon." He whispered and Calleigh gripped his head, guiding him back up to meet her eyes as she smirked sleepily, pulling herself up to press her lips to his. She kissed him soundly, clinging to the feeling that in moments like this, she could forget the aches and the pains and her fears. He made her forget. And she loved him for it._

Eric appeared from the bedroom with a grin on his face as he watched the women move about the kitchen. He was wearing ivory dress-pants and a white button-down shirt and his mother eyed his bare feet curiously as he crossed the room. He ignored her look and shrugged his shoulders, continuing on to the backyard and taking a beer from Ryan's outstretched hand as he re-joined the rest of his guests.

"Hello?" A voice called from the front door and Carmen's eyes lit up with joy at the sound of the familiar tone. She wiped her hands on a dish-towel, pushing her way between the women and out into the foyer, grinning when she set her eyes on the man who had cautiously let himself into the house.

"Horatio, mijo, welcome." She took him into her arms and he gratefully lent down for the embrace. He set the small gift he was holding on the table to his left and lent back to allow her to place a kiss to his forehead. "It has been too long." She smiled, still holding his head in her hands because she had missed him greatly. She hadn't seen him since the funeral of her youngest daughter and it had pained her, to know that he thought he was no longer welcome in her family. It had taken her a very long time to convince him, that the death of his wife, did not mean he was no longer her husband. It didn't mean, that she no longer considered him her son. "Eric told me everything that you discussed. I want to know," She dropped her hands to his shoulders, meeting his eyes firmly. "are you happy with his choice?"

Horatio smiled and inclinded his head. "I am," She cocked her head to the side and he chuckled lightly. "your son has been an asset to my team, Ma'am, but he has more pressing issues now." He looked left and right, making sure that they were out of the range of prying ears before he whispered. "he's taking on the responsibilities of a husband and I'm proud of him. Happy for them; you are of the few who know how I feel about the pair of them."

Carmen smirked conspiratorially, nodding her agreement. "I do and I'm sure Calleigh appreciates the fatherly pride you hold for her, also. Come," She spoke louder, no longer keeping secrets as she pulled him through the house. "the men are out in the backyard, everyone is almost here and Calleigh will return soon." Horatio picked the small gift back up off the side table, watching Carmen as she returned to the kitchen and with a hesitant step, he made his way out into the yard. He patted Eric's shoulder, grasping his attention and the younger man embraced him in a warm, half-hug as a man he'd never before met, kindly offered him a beer.

* * *

_**Veritas vos liberabit;  
The truth shall set you free.**_

* * *

Calleigh greeted her father with a bright smile and a warm embrace as he helped her down from Wyatt's Escalade. Her brother made his way around the car, shaking their father's hand brisquely as he patted his shoulder, performing their regular kind of detached greeting. Calleigh was never quite sure when it had happened, that her brother and father had drifted so far apart. But she knew why it had happened. She understood how she'd been so eager and so ready to forgive their father's shortcomings when Wyatt couldn't. It was where they were so drastically different.

Wyatt wore his emotions on his sleeve, much like their father whilst Calleigh, with her calculated thinking and her determination to analyse everything until it was boiled down to a simplistic equation, had the rational distance from everything emotional around her to be able to look at her father's actions from a more mature point of view. She'd say she had age on Wyatt, but when she thought about it she knew that her two years meant little to nothing. She'd wanted desperately to forgive her father whilst Wyatt had tried so hard, for so long, to just simply forget. They'd reached a point where they were civil and Calleigh was grateful, at least, for that.

"So, you're ready to face the music, Lambchop?" Duke questioned, wrapping his arm around his daughter's waist and throwing a glance at his son as he followed them up the front garden path. Calleigh chuckled, meeting her father's eyes as he hugged her tighter.

"It's not like it's a huge secret, Dad." She smirked, stepping up to the front door, out of his hold.

"Hey, when only a handful of your friends know you're getting married, Lambchop, that's counted as a secret."

She laughed, rolling her eyes as she guided the two men into her home, tossing her keys aside as she walked straight into Carmen's waiting arms. The older woman had heard the car pull up, even over the chatter of the women around her and the sound of the laughter and squeals of children, coming from the backyard. "Duke," Carmen greeted, kissing his cheek whilst she still gripped Calleigh's hands before turning her attention to the man standing just behind Calleigh. "and this must be Wyatt?" She looked to Calleigh with the question in her eyes though it was Melissa, with her arms curling around her husband's waist, who answered with a proud grin.

"This is him."

Carmen shook his hand happily, turning back to Calleigh with that motherly glow that had her reaching for her hands again. Carmen pressed her cheek to Calleigh's whispering in her ear and with a flutter in her heart, Calleigh's eyes drifted out to the backyard where Eric was standing, lauging at something his father was saying. With a wide smile on his face, he caught her eye and Calleigh felt her cheeks warm as he crossed the room to greet her. She wanted every moment in their future to be just like that one. She wanted her knees to weaken, every time he caught her eye from across the room. She wanted her heart to pound and her hands to sweat every time he reached out for her and wrapped her tightly in his arms, leaning down to kiss her lips deeply as though it wasn't just that morning, mere hours ago, that he'd kissed her last.

"I missed you." He whispered, knowing that his mother and likely everyone else who was currently in the room, was watching them, but he didn't care.

"Me too," She pressed her forehead to his, breathing in the scent of him as he gripped her hand tightly and led her out into the backyard.

"Ready?" He asked her, pulling her into his side as he watched everyone file out into the backyard. They were all watching the pair of them on baited breath. Natalia was seated on one of the tables, with Eric's youngest neice, Ruby, rested on her lap trying to feed her potato chips. Ryan was passing beers to his brother's-in-law, Alexx was pushing her way through the small crowed in order to get as close to Calleigh as she could and Valera had just arrived through the back gate to be greeted by Eric's smiling cousin. Horatio was seated on the garden wall at the back of the group and thoughtless of his sunglasses, Calleigh smiled he looked up at her. His expression was gentle and proud as they all listened to Eric's announcement, Calleigh blushed when the words finally left his lips and reached the ears of their closest friends, that they were going to be married.

It made it seem so much more real, having them know and as Alexx reached out to squeeze her hand, Calleigh felt warm, happy tears burn at the corner of her eyes. The smiles fell away, though, when the news of Eric's departure from CSI nervously stumbled out of his mouth. Ryan and Natalia's faces fell, Valera nearly choked on her first sip of beer and Alexx' fingers gripped Calleigh's until both her's and her young friend's knuckles, were white. Frank looked like he wasn't breathing and Horatio just looked down at his hands, silently knowing that it would have come eventually.

"You're leaving for good?" Natalia asked, hopping off the table and sending Ruby waddling off to her mother, Ana.

Eric nodded, looking down to Calleigh's bright green eyes smiling up at him. "We've talked about this and we feel that it's the best choice. I've got plans," He hugged Calleigh's shoulders and swallowed. "we're going to buy a boat, and I'm going to start a touring business."

"That sounds like quite a venture, honey." Alexx smiled proudly, pulling Calleigh into her embrace before the rest of the crowd surrounded them with cheers and excitement. The music started up again and the party raged on. Dinner was served up and even though Calleigh's strength was waning, she danced with Eric, her father and her brother. Ade pulled her to her feet, trying to get her into the swing of the party but eventually, with a tired smile, she apologetically pulled away. Eric watched her retreat into the kitchen and he followed her, just as far as the livingroom so that he could make sure she was alright.

All she did was get herself a glass of water and press her back to the fridge with her eyes closed to catch her breath. When she opened them, he was standing there and instead of the surprise that he'd expected, a smile spread on Calleigh's lips and she held her hand out for him to take, before pulling him into her and sinking her body into his arms. "I'm happy," She whispered into his shirt and Eric hugged her tighter, licking his lips as he ran his fingers over the soft, purple silk at the back of her neck.

"Anything else is just gravy." Eric added to her comment and Calleigh smiled against the white cotton, pressing a kiss to the button at her eye level.

"I just really wish I had the energy to really enjoy this." She whispered and Eric nodded, wishing there was something he could do to ease her worries and fears and take away her discomfort.

"Hey," He held her face in his hands, brushing his thumbs over her cheekbones as she slowly blinked and met his eyes. "think of this," He ducked down a little bit, so that they were as close to the same height as he could manage and he smiled whistfully. "in a few years you're going to be over this disease, we're going to be happy and there's going to be a little boy or girl with dark skin, green eyes and an unnatural love for guns and swimming."

Calleigh laughed with a tear in her eye, imagining the picture he'd painted in her head and marvelling at how accurate it was, to the dreams she'd had in the past. To think that he had the same thoughts too, made her whole body fill with warmth and excitement for the future beyond this moment in their lives. It gave her hope, that after this party there would be another one that she'd be healthy enough to endure and after that, there'd be another one that she was excited enough to host. They'd have children she was strong enough to raise who would know their mother with thick blond hair and an assortment of colourful neck-scarves.

"You really think so?" She asked, touching her fingers to the back of his hands and he nodded, resting a kiss to her forehead.

"With all of my heart."

* * *

**_Time changes everything,  
Life must go on,  
And I'm not gonna stand in your way.  
_**~ Heartland.

* * *

Calleigh made her way down the lawn towards him, brushing her palms across the front of her jeans as she smiled, taking a seat beside him and resting her hands on the garden wall on either side of her hips. He smiled over at her, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees whilst they both looked up toward the rest of the party. The smallest of the children had taken to following Natalia around everywhere that she went and Ryan's stories seemed to have Eric's father and cousins adequately entertained. Cora was standing on Eric's feet, smiling and laughing as he danced with her and Melissa and Wyatt were completely lost in each other, not even noticing how Duke watched them happily, smiling as they danced to their own tune.

"How are you doing?" Calleigh asked, looking up to him and Horatio smirked, nodding.

"I'm well, and you?"

"I've been better," She chuckled lightly and Horatio did catch her humour but he didn't laugh so heartily, knowing that it was true. "we're coping, in our own way. So what's happening with Stelter?" Calleigh questioned, rubbing her hands together between her knees.

Horatio smiled, staring down at the grass. "Well," He paused. "I think Eric would appreciate hearing from you, that there's no need to worry about him any longer. The charges have been dropped and you," He reached over to take her hand into his, running his thumb over her knuckles gently. "you don't have to see him again." Calleigh let out a deep breath, dropping her other hand on top of his as she laughed happily. "I'm happy for you, Calleigh," He whispered and Calleigh met his eyes as he pulled his glasses from their place on the bridge of his nose, freeing his soft blue eyes so that she could see them clearly. "I am."

"Thank you, Horatio, that," She choked. "that means a lot."

"Well," Horatio pulled the small gift he'd brought with him, out of his pocket and held it out to her. "I hope that this means a little more."

"What is it?" She tentatively took it, watching him with wide eyes.

"Let's just say," He smiled. "it's a little bit of proof."

"Proof?" Calleigh giggled, not quite sure what he was getting at as she flipped the small, flat package between her fingers.

"I spoke to your father and Eric's parents and between the four of us, we put this together for the pair of you, to show you we have no reservations about all of this."

Carefully, with her eyes set firmly on him, Calleigh started to open up the package. She pulled the ribbon away, setting it on the wall beside her as she tugged on the tape holding the paper together. Horatio met the eyes of Eric, as he made his way across the grass and Calleigh shivered, when his hand dropped to her shoulder and she could feel the warmth of his touch through the thin fabric of her flowing green blouse. "What's this?" Eric questioned, dropping to sit beside Calleigh as she pulled the paper away to reveal a blank envelope.

"It's a gift from Horatio and our parents." She looked up at him, dubiously. "do you want to finish doing the honours?"

"No," He held his hands up. "you're doing a great job, you open it."

With the suspense driving her mad, Calleigh ripped the envelope open to see a small peice of paper folded in half. She pulled it out and unfolded it, letting the now empty envelope drop into Eric's lap. With wide eyes and a slightly confused frown, Calleigh looked up at Horatio and pressed her lips together in a thin line. "It's a picture of a boat."

"It's a picture of the boat we've put a down-payment on," Carmen breathed out, dropping her back into her husband's chest as Calleigh and Eric looked up at her, only just realising them standing there. They both looked shocked and surprised and overjoyed at the same time. Eric reached for the picture, studying it with intensity as Calleigh continued to stare up at his parents, seeing her own father step out from behind them.

"You all did this?" She asked, setting her eyes on each of them in turn, not sure if she was going to laugh or cry at the gesture. Here they'd tried to keep their plans a secret but their parents and Horatio had managed to keep this from them so much better. "We don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything, Lambchop." Duke breathed through a tear-filled smile and Calleigh wanted to jump up and wrap her arms around him, but was unable to move for fear that this dream would fade away.

"Just make the most of it." Horatio said softly and finally, Calleigh choked out a sob of joy. Eric wrapped his arms around her, hugging her tightly before jumping up and sharing the same with his mother, his father and Duke. He shook Horatio's hand as the older man stood, but it was only so long before he was embracing the man like a brother before he was turning to throw his arms around Calleigh, lifting her up until her feet left the ground and she shreiked in surprise. She clung to him, kissing his cheek as he held her.

"We thought that, well," Duke grinned, taking the encouragement of Carmen nodding her head, to continue as Eric dropped Calleigh back to her feet beside him. "you've already got everything you need, this is something that we could do to help you with something you want. You didn't need a house, so, that's where the boat came in."

"Thank you, Daddy." Calleigh stepped towards him and kissed his cheek, turning around to address them all as she held her father's and Eric's hands. "thank you, all of you."

"The one thing we ask," Pavel spoke softly, his faint russian accent quieting the group. "is that you get better, Calleigh. Smile," he stepped out from behind Carmen, reaching for Calleigh's shoulders and holding her firmly ahead of him as she looked up into his clear grey eyes. "smile and don't stop making my boy smile." Calleigh's eyes drifted to Eric and they softened, seeing her tall, strong fiance with tears in his eyes and a wide smile on his lips.

"As long as he doesn't stop telling me he believes I can do that."

"Never," Eric rasped. "I'll never stop telling you that and I don't care how many guns you have."

Calleigh laughed, falling into Pavel's arms as he hugged her like she was one of his own daughters.

TBC.

* * *

Also, guys, I'm not actually reading spoilers and while some comments in my story my point towards certain aspects of spoilers for the new season, it's not intentional. I would prefer to stay as far out of the loop on spoilers as I can so if you don't mind, as much as I love your reviews, I would really appreciate it if you didn't mention any spoilers in them. I just, I really don't want to know of anything bad or unwanted that might be coming or not coming because I'm really suggestible and if something upsets me enough, I might lose interest in writing and that's the last thing I want. Especially with how wrapped in this story I am. So, with love guys, please no spoilers?


	14. Chapter 14

I thought we needed a little bit more Ryan for a moment. So here we go.

Also, if anyone is on Twitter? Texasjen and Marija have finally convinced me to get it. So, come say hello to 'SpecklesG' if you want to find me there (I don't quite know how to work it, but I'll stumble through). I hope everyone enjoys this chapter, because there is something very special coming next. ;)

* * *

With his hands buried deep in his pockets, Ryan stood by the desk with a smirk on his face, watching Eric fussing around his work-bench with a focused look on his face. His friend was so intent on what he was doing, that he didn't see him there and that amused Ryan to no end. And it wasn't like he was going to make his presence known anytime in the near future; that would take all the fun right out of the moment. Instead, he pulled his hands from his pockets and crossed his arms over his chest, watching the man work.

He had to say, as far as his speculations had taken him in regards to the ominous party invitation he'd received from Wyatt - a man who, at the time, he'd never met - he'd never expected what had come of it. When he thought about it, he realised that he didn't quite know what he'd expected but for them to say that they were getting married and that, for the sake of the future family they wanted to have - a concept which, Ryan still couldn't quite fathom - Eric was leaving Miami-Dade PD, for good.

He tried to imagine it in his head. He tried to picture Calleigh pregnant and Eric working regular hours. He tried to picture them reading nursery rhymes to a child and doing dishes and laundry and picking toys up off the floor. But all that seemed to come to him was the image of Calleigh cleaning a Smith & Wesson whilst Eric drooled over her from a distance, most of the time with a wall between them. They'd gone from friends to a couple so suddenly in his eyes, that the transition seemed too quick for him to process and he wasn't quite sure if he was going to be ready in time, to stop thinking of them as Eric and Calleigh and start thinking of them as 'The Delkos'.

It gave him a strange feeling, though it wasn't entirely unwelcome.

The fleeting memory of a crush he'd had on Calleigh, back when he'd first visited the lab, did dance across his eyes. But Eric had told him about the first time _he'd_ met Calleigh and the notion that he'd ever had a chance there, gently flitted away on the breeze. He noticed, with a whimsical smirk, that the day they'd each met the infamous Calleigh Duquesne, had indeed been the very same day. Ryan was there on a tour of the lab, hoping and dreaming of one day becoming a CSI when this beautiful, tiny, radiant woman had made her way over to him, shaken his hand and burned in his mind, that he no longer wanted to be a CSI, he needed to be.

She hadn't remembered that day, when they met again all those years later. At least, he thought she hadn't remembered. But there had been hints.

Eric talked about the first day they met, a couple of times, and as he watched on he noticed how her eyes lit up and her cheeks flushed pink as she laughed and pointed out that he'd been so tactless in his approach to woo her from the very first moment he'd lain eyes on her. Calleigh had turned to Ryan with laughter in her eyes and intent in her demeanour, to embarress Eric as she explained to him about the tour group Eric had nearly gunned down in his pursuit of her through the halls of the lab. Neither of them had seemed to notice the realisation in his eyes and, with the way they looked at each other, he didn't really expect them too. But Ryan knew he was the one Eric had nearly knocked off his feet, before continuing on his jog after the diminutive blond. And then Ryan had realised that it wasn't that they'd forgotten him, per sae, it was that they'd _remembered_ each other and with a smile he knew that that's what really mattered to him in the long run.

Watching Eric's shoulders hunch and his brow furrow in deep concentration, he thought again on the image of his two friends as Momma and Daddy at parent-teacher conferences. He tried to picture them packing lunches into different coloured boxes for two kids with dark hair, one with light and he found it easier, the harder he tried, to imagine them sitting together in the stands of a mini-league football game. But no matter how hard he tried, in every image conjured, Calleigh still had a Lady Smith strapped to the back of her jeans.

He smirked, chuckling almost silently to himself as he realised that that was probably, actually, pretty accurate.

Eric looked up, hearing Ryan's quiet laugh and frowning as they seemed to notice each other. "What's so funny, Wolfe?"

"Nothing," Ryan tried to stop laughing. "it's nothing."

"Seems like some funny nothing." Eric smirked and Ryan nodded, pressing his hands to the bench and taking a breath.

"Well, it's just, you know,"

Eric laughed too, resting his elbows on the benchtop, removing his gloves and assuming that what Ryan had been laughing at was the utter inconceivability of he and Calleigh marrying at the end of the present week. "Yeah, you know, we didn't really intend on keeping it a secret so long. We just never found the right time I suppose, so it all still seems so unreal."

"Yeah," Ryan snorted. "It's almost like imagining catching my parents in the-"

Eric cut him off with a look of disgust. "Neither Calleigh or I are old enough to be your parents, Wolfe, and even if we were, the looks you throw Calleigh when you think no one's looking, would be considered so very wrong."

"Not like you're my parents," He rolled his eyes. "and I do not look at Calleigh in any sort of _way_."

"Wolverine, you gaze."

"No I don't!" He defended and Eric just continued to laugh, knowing there was nothing Ryan could say that was going to convince him to let it go. "whatever. What I meant was, I look up to you guys and while you being together didn't weird me out, because I never really saw it, this just makes everything feel really different."

They all knew it'd come eventually. People grow and change and they move on. Jobs come and go and none of them were getting any younger. They all knew, that one day their group would grow and fray and drift apart and when he thought about it, Ryan was glad that it was happening in a way that would ensure that in some way, they'd all still be together. But five years just didn't seem long enough, in a job with colleagues that he respected so completely. Now they'd get a replacement for Eric and there would be that nervous limbo they'd all be sitting in whilst they decided if they liked him or not. He and Natalia would have to do the hazing, because Calleigh was above that now and he couldn't help but feel that it would be all the more contrived, because it wasn't Calleigh and Eric working their magic on the newbie.

There was an honesty to their pranks that he'd never managed to recreate when he and Eric would play a practical joke. The one they'd played on the temporary Medical Examiner that was around while Alexx was on leave, Tara was her name; had lacked Calleigh's finesse and he remembered standing beside Eric with an equally pathetic look on his face as they begged her to go down there and make the peace for them.

He was going to miss bumbling around the lab with Eric and he just couldn't quite work out how to say it. The man was his best friend, if he sat down and really gave it thought and the idea of not seeing his annoyingly jovial face every day, sat awkwardly on his shoulders.

"Hey, Wolfe?" Eric questioned, his tone quieter and his eyes set on his hands.

"Yeah, man?"

"Can I ask you something?"

"Sure," Ryan dropped his hands back to his pockets, inclining his head, proving to the slightly older man, that he had his full attention. "anything."

"You know my cousin, Ade? He was at the party yesterday."

Ryan frowned, thinking. "Yeah, young guy, about twenty-two, cheesy Delko grin."

"That's the one. Look, I've already asked him to be my best man along with Wyatt and I was wondering," Eric paused. "you know, for balance sake because Calleigh's got Melissa, Ana and Maria on her side, that you might," He swallowed. "I just thought you might want to," He looked up at his friend. "stand up there with me?"

Ryan glanced away, hiding from his friend, the entirely feminine reaction that the question had conjured in him. He'd never live it down, if Eric knew just how much the idea made him jump up and down inside his head, excitedly. So he took a deep breath, schooled his features and looked back down at his friend to answer. "Sure, man, you know I'd be honored."

* * *

_**This woman's work,  
This woman's world.**_

* * *

The house was dark as Carmen stepped inside, setting her key down on the small table next to Calleigh's as she rested her bags beside the door. She set about tidying the livingroom first, there were a few empty cups and scrunched up serviettes from the previous day's party and she had to open the blinds on the back windows to let some sunlight into the house before she moved on to the kitchen, clearing away what looked like Eric's breakfast dishes - a half-eaten bowl of Cheerios and a cold cup of Cubano - left beside, instead of in, the sink.

She opened the back door to let some air in before making her way down the hall towards the closed bedroom door. She knew that Eric was working that morning, he had cases and paperwork to finish before his last day as a police officer and she had plans with Calleigh to go and get her a bridal gown. She'd expected Calleigh to be up, because she'd never yet arrived at their home to Calleigh as anything less than impeccably presentable. She'd also expected to see Wyatt and Melissa somewhere in the house, but the spare room was completely made up as if no one had even slept there and the sofa bed hadn't been unrolled for the girls. It confused her, just a little, but as she carefully edged the bedroom door open, all thoughts of anything else left her completely.

The room was shrouded in darkness and she could feel the cool breeze of a window left open, skirting along the floor. The heavy drapes rustled a little, but the sunlight didn't break through and Carmen was nervous to turn on the light. She didn't want to wake her, if she was sleeping peacefully, but at half past eleven in the morning she knew that if Calleigh wasn't out of bed, something was wrong.

It was then, as she moved towards the bed cautiously, that the light creeping in from the hallway cast a glow across the mattress and she could see that it was empty, but for the turned down blankets and the ruffled sheets. "Calleigh?" She called softly, licking her lips as her heart started to beat just a little bit faster. A shuffling sound came from behind her and she turned, squinting toward the bathroom door that was sitting ajar. The small ensuite was as dark as the bedroom and the door creaked as she pushed it open. She tried to see clearly, but the darkness was hurting her eyes. She heard a faint whimper and she abandoned all notions of trying to be polite and quickly reached for the light switch, flicking it on.

She felt her heart hit the floor, as she took in the sight that greeted her. Calleigh was seated on the floor, her pink scarf lay abandoned on the cold tiles, tangled in her bare feet. She was wearing a camisole and her underwear and with the way she was hunched over herself, with her arms wrapped around her knees and her face buried in her hands, Carmen could see her scar beyond the loose-fitting silk. Calleigh's body was shaking with sobs, her feet and hands were red and she had scuffs on her pale knees.

Carmen dropped down beside her, wanting to take her into her arms but afraid of touching her, breaking her. "Calleigh," She whispered and as the younger woman lifted her head, raising her glistening green eyes, framed with the harsh red from hours of crying, Carmen had to bite down hard on her lip to fight her own pain. She reached out to her, resting her hand against the shivering goosebumps on her arm, running her palm around to her back and pulling her into her embrace as she let her tears run freely down her face.

Calleigh buried her face in Carmen's blouse, letting her wrap her arms around her as the two women lay bundled on the floor. She could feel Carmen's tears on the top of her head and she clung tighter to the soft fabric of her sweater, weezing in the breaths that were harder to take. She'd awoken to silence in her home and the cold emptiness of her bed without Eric. She knew that it was irrational to miss him so much but that, coupled with the swirling nausea that had attacked her as soon as she stood, Calleigh had made it to the bathroom just in time to empty her stomach of all the wonderful memories the previous day's party had provided. She'd seen herself in the mirror then, as she rinsed her mouth and splashed her face, trying to tidy herself. But she hadn't seen Calleigh Duquesne looking back at her. All she saw was a gaunt, bald person staring at her with tired eyes and her stomach had churned as she'd run her fingers along the line of her scar just below her left breast. She didn't feel feminine, she didn't feel beautiful and without Eric there to convince her otherwise, she'd collapsed in a pool of self-pity. She'd sat down on the tiles, feeling the freezing cold of them against her thighs and she'd cried.

"Hey, _mija_," Carmen cooed, hugging her tighter to her chest as Calleigh wept. "it's alright." Carmen didn't know quite what to say to her. Eric had told her that sometimes he'd find Calleigh alone in their bedroom, crying quietly with a scarf in her hand or standing by the mirror, running her fingers over the top of her head. But somehow, she didn't feel that this was quite the same. Calleigh's body was racking with sobs, her limbs were freezing cold and her narrow shoulders were slumped against the side of the bathtub.

"I hate this," Calleigh rasped, pulling on the sleeve of Carmen's sweater, unconciously trying to pull herself closer to the other woman's warmth. Carmen dropped a kiss to the top of her head and Calleigh could feel the flutter of eyelashes against her scalp. There was an ache in her heart that tugged at her, hoping and wishing that she'd feel safe enough with her own mother, to break down in front of her like this. But the sweet, gentle matriarch with her arms wrapped tightly around her, had a strength Calleigh knew that her own mother just didn't possess.

"I know." Carmen was the very definition of loving. She had sisters, brothers, cousins. She had children and grandchildren and there was not one, Calleigh knew, that she couldn't picture Carmen holding in her arms on the cold tile floor of their bathroom when all they wanted to do was drown in their own tears.

She loved each and every member of her family and even those that weren't a member yet. She loved grandchildren that weren't yet born and she loved grandparents that were long dead and as Calleigh listened to the whispered words of a spanish prayer uttered just behind her ear, she found herself closing her eyes slowly and repeating the same words over in her own head. She hadn't prayed in years, not since she was a little girl. But the feeling of it, the feeling of her lips moving silently and the weight of her worries shifting to Carmen's shoulders, started to eleviate her aches and her fears.

"Are you well enough, to stand?" Carmen whispered, running her hand up and down Calleigh's arm. She was trying to soothe her, and warm her.

"I," Calleigh paused, leaning away to press her palms to the floor, levelling herself. "I think so."

Carmen climbed to her feet, resting herself against the edge of the bath as she gripped Calleigh's hand, gently pulling her up until they were both standing. Calleigh's head dropped to Carmen's shoulder and the older woman smiled, reaching for the plush black robe on the back of the door and wrapping it around her shoulders. Calleigh immediately shuddered, hugging the fluffy fabric against her body and taking a deep breath. "This is Eric's." She stated on a breath and Carmen felt the warmth of her emotions, run through her own veins. It made her smile and as she pressed her hand to the small of Calleigh's back, leading her back into the bedroom, she felt better that the girl was off the cold floor.

She didn't need pneumonia on top of everything else.

"I'm sorry, Carmen." Calleigh muttered as she crossed the room.

Carmen watched her carefully, studying how she'd changed the moment she'd stepped out of the confines of the bathroom. All of a sudden, her shoulders were straighter, she'd reached to turn on the lights and she was carefully tying her previously discared pink scarf, around her head. She was hiding, Carmen could tell, but she wasn't quite sure if addressing the point would be the best course of action.

"You don't have to apologise, Calleigh." She whispered, instead of elaborating on how she really felt. She was worried, if she was honest with herself and she wanted to be able to ask Calleigh what it was that had broken her that morning, in particular.

"I know," She choked, dropping to sit on the bed as she sniffed and tried to avert her eyes. "I was just," She wasn't having the best time finishing her sentences. She was either confused or tired or she was afraid of what Carmen might think. She wasn't even sure and as she buried her hands in the plush robe, she tried to meet the other woman's warm brown eyes. She was still standing just outside of the bathroom, because she wasn't quite sure where to go just yet, instead choosing to watch Calleigh. "they're all gone. Wyatt went back to Tampa last night, just for the rest of the week and Eric's at work. I just felt so, I mean I knew you were coming but," She stopped herself, looking down at her hands.

"_Mija_," Carmen slipped down to sit on the bed beside her, reaching over to take her hand into hers.

"It's ridiculous." Calleigh blurted. "I feel so stupid, I shouldn't be acting this way."

"What? Why?"

Calleigh looked up at her with an expression that implied she should know and Carmen sighed, patting her hand. "You are allowed to be afraid, Calleigh. You're allowed to feel lonely. You're allowed to call for help."

"No," Calleigh shook her head. "no," She repeated. "I'm strong, I'm brave," Tears were pooring down her face as she looked up at Carmen. "I'm the one that doesn't break," She let out a deep sigh. "but that's all I seem to be doing lately."

With a gentle, motherly hand, Carmen ran her fingers down the side of Calleigh's face. "Oh, _mija_, we all break from time to time."

"No," Calleigh swallowed, still shaking her head. "not me."

"Yes," Carmen insisted. "even you." She caressed Calleigh cheek. "Everyone falls, Calleigh."

Calleigh set her eyes on the wall ahead of her. With all of the things Eric had done for her, with all that he'd given and given up, Calleigh still couldn't quite pull her head around the notion that he was going to be there no matter what. She'd known Carmen for years and even though every quality the woman had, made Calleigh's heart soar with respect and admiration, she couldn't understand why she'd care so deeply for _her_. She and Eric were getting married in four days and she was panicking, scared that she may have made the most selfish decision of her life. Because even though all she'd ever wanted was a happy, loving home, she was staring it in the face and she still couldn't believe that it was completely real. "I don't. Because I learnt a long time ago, that no one was going to help me up."

"Eric will; always."

Calleigh tried to turn her head away, but Carmen's palms pressed to her cheeks, guided her back to meet the older woman's weathered eyes.

"My son has never wanted something so badly, as he wants you." Carmen whispered, letting a lone tear trickle down her cheek. "Where you go, he will follow you. I have faith in that. You are allowed to cry, _mija_, because we will always be here." Calleigh smiled, softly, feeling the sincerity in her words as she brushed her thumbs over her cheeks much the way Eric did, though it had a far different meaning. "Come," Carmen grinned, gripping her hands firmly and urging her to rise from the bed. "I have something for you, I think now is the right time." She smirked, leading Calleigh out into the house.

Calleigh hugged Eric's robe tighter, taking a seat on the arm of the sofa as Carmen returned to the front door to collect her bag. She set it on the coffee table, pulling on Calleigh's hand until both women were sitting side by side on the sofa together. "When Eric told me that you'd accepted his proposal," She carefully pulled a flat white box out of the bag, resting it on the table's surface as she smiled, excitedly, but spoke calmly. "when he told me you were going to be married, I started work on this." Lifting the lid on the small box, Carmen grinned as Calleigh's breath caught in her throat.

Buried under a sheet of tissue paper was a thick, silk, hand-sewn scarf of ivory white. The edges were trimmed with lace and as Calleigh reached for it, carefully lifting it as though it could break, she realised that it was the most beautiful thing she'd ever seen. "You made this?" She gasped and Carmen nodded, resting her hand on Calleigh's forearm.

"For my new daughter. My beautiful, new daughter."

Calleigh chuckled. "Well, I don't know about-"

Carmen cut her off. "We don't see this," She pointed to Calleigh's head. "we only see everything that you've always been."

"Thank you," Calleigh sighed, hugging the scarf to her chest. "thank you, Carmen. The scarf is beautiful."

"Come now," Carmen stood. "lets go and find you the perfect gown to match it."

TBC.


	15. Chapter 15

Well guys, it's Miami Monday (well, it's almost Tuesday here but what-the-hey) it's a celebratory chapter for an exciting day! This is the one most of you have been hankering for! It's by far my longest chapter, but I feel that it needed to be and I hope that it delivers everything you've hoped for and maybe a little more? We'll see.

Also, if you'd like to see a drawing that I did of Calleigh and Eric on their wedding day, go to the 'homepage' link in my profile. It is a direct link to the drawing. It's just a sketch, but I did it because I, personally, wanted to see Calleigh and Eric on their big day. So I hope you all like it. I can't wait to hear what you think of this chapter.

* * *

_**I'm holding a fortune that heaven has given to me.  
I'll try to show you each and every way I can,  
Now and forever,  
I will be your man.**  
~ Now and Forever_, Richard Marx

* * *

Calleigh's nails dug into the inside of Duke's wrist as the Black Chrysler limousine, turned down West Flagler. Duke couldn't see the church just yet, but he knew that meant little to the Menolo Blahnick - that was black with ivory lace trim on the seams - tapping an anxious rhythm against the floor of the car. When he'd first seen her that morning, he thought that she could quite possibly be the most beautiful creature he'd ever laid eyes on and, much to his disappointment in himself, his first thought was that he had no right to give her away. As much as he loved her and cherished her, as much as he respected her and believed that she'd become the most amazing woman he could have ever hoped she'd be, he couldn't help but feel that he'd had no positive hand in her upbringing. He was the reason, and not in a good way, why she'd come to be who she was at that very moment and as he gently lay his hand over her wrist, loosening her hold on him with a gentle smile, he was starting to think that walking her down the aisle wasn't the best idea.

But then she looked at him with those adoring eyes, so hopeful of a happy, perfect day. And he couldn't bring himself to burden her with his ponderings on the fact that, his presence in the bridal party was strictly ceremonial - because with a wedding in the Catholic Church, so near and dear to the Delko family, Calleigh was happily content to adhere to their religious wishes - and in no way implied that he had any real claim to her, whatsover. He couldn't stop her marrying the man of her choice, even if he wanted to and that made him proud, in the smallest measure, that she was strong and perfect and brave in spite of him.

_Calleigh giggled as Melissa eyed her curiously, slipping the black strap over her knee with care before stretching it around her thigh and pressing the velcro down. None of the other women in the room had a clue what she was up to, and for that she was proud of herself, and she was just grateful Carmen had left nearly fifteen minutes ago and wasn't in the room to stop her from slipping the small gun into the holster before dropping her skirt. "It's a joke," She shrugged, shimmying a little as the long, wavy gown fell around her feet. It trailed along the ground just a little more than it was supposed to because she was yet to slip into her shoes and because it was still hanging open at the back, with a hand to her chest she needed to hold it in place to view herself in the mirror. "for Eric's sake." She grinned, meeting Melissa's eyes in their reflection as she zipped her up._

_"Isn't a garter belt a little more traditional?" Ana laughed, standing in front of Maria to have her sister zip up her dress before the two sister's joined Calleigh and Melissa in the mirror._

_"My point exactly." Calleigh grinned and the rest of the girls laughed, moving to put their jewellery on._

_The bridesmaid's dresses were a silvery champagne with a broad ivory band pulled across the middle that tied up at the back, forming the line of the ivory train that followed the back of the dresses to the ground. Their bouquets, while small, consisted of pink tulips all tied tightly with a ribbon that matched their dresses. Calleigh's bouquet was larger, but only just and while her tulips were white for the most part they were interspersed with a touch of pale pink._

As she stepped out of the car, with her hand held demurely in her father's; layers of delicately woven, ivory chiffon tumbled down her leg and over her shoes to touch down, like feathers, to the dark stone path. She gripped her skirts in one hand as they walked towards the stone steps and she could feel the gentle pull on the end of her dress as it dragged along the broad cobblestones. Looking up to the sky, Calleigh could hear the bells chiming and the sound of the birds, hiding in the fronds of the palm trees and she smiled brightly, meeting her dad's eyes as they waited for the second car to pull up.

Duke hugged Calleigh into his side, squeezing her shoulders as the three identically dressed women joined them on the stoop, all smiling giddily and giggling as they walked ahead, making their way through the large, creaky wooden doors and into the church.

"Are you ready, Lambchop?" He questioned and Calleigh took a deep breath.

"Is my scarf straight?"

Duke frowned, looking up at the scarf wrapped expertly around her head. It was folded and ruffled so that the lace became a focal point across her forehead and the embroidery followed around to the back of her head. It was tied in a large, looping bow just below her right ear and he knew - because he was positive his opinion on the subject didn't actually matter - that it was wrapped perfectly and had been since she'd put it on. "Of course. Now come on, it's time to go in."

Calleigh let him pull her, holding his hand as he guided her into the church and made sure herself and her entire gown was through the door before he let it fall shut. As soon as they were inside and the sunlight from the doorway had disappeared, they were shrouded in candlelight and the sweet smell of the tulips Calleigh had chosen, to mark the ends of the pews.

There was another door that they had to go through, before they'd be in the main room and with a slight flutter in her heart, Calleigh met the eyes of Melissa - the only person standing between her and the congregation, because she was standing on the threshold with the handle of the partially opened door in her hand. Duke smiled and Calleigh dipped her head to accept the kiss he placed on the bridge of her nose and with one last lick of her lips, they were walking towards the doors.

They watched, from the open doorway, as Ana hooked her arm around Ryan's, then Maria took the arm of Wyatt who sent Calleigh a wink before heading down the aisle. Melissa gave Ade a small curtsy, which was rewarded by a rather theatrical bow on his part and Calleigh had to hold her hand over her mouth to muffle a small laugh. She hadn't looked out over the crowd yet, having been too distracted by the bridal party and their silent well-wishes and light-hearted antics. But when she did look, casting her eyes over the sea of people all there to see her get married, she blushed with the sheer volume in the room. They'd decided against having the guests choose bride's side or groom's, so the group was awash with radiant gown colours and smiles from their family and friends, all different and unique, staring at her in the same way.

She felt humbled, in that moment, that all these people could be excited just for her and the man standing with his back to her, at the end of the aisle. She watched the back of his head, smiling as he twitched and slowly turned around when the music changed as she and Duke stepped up to the end of the aisle. But, as she looked out over the crowd again, Calleigh froze when she met the eyes of the one person, she'd never expected to see.

In the end pew, just by her right side, was a woman seated in a cool blue dress. Her shoulder-length blond hair was pulled up and out of her eyes, with a white lily pinned to the side of her bun. Her eyes were watery and shining an almost emerald green with pride and, to Calleigh's slight surprise, love. She wasn't quite sure how she'd learnt of the date or the location of the wedding, but the look in the woman's eyes made her grateful to which ever member of her very small family, had felt it necessary to meddle in her affairs. Duke hugged her arm into his side protectively and Calleigh patted his hand as the crowd stood and the woman who had Calleigh's full attention, rose to her feet with an apologetic smile.

The music was drifting over the crowd and they were all silent but for the pounding hearts of the man standing by the alter and the woman who had just set her eyes on her mother. Calleigh slipped her bouquet into the hand her father had hooked over his arm and for a moment she dropped her right hand down to her side, letting it fall empty as she passed by Charlotte. And she was grateful, when she felt the gentle warmth of fingers brushing hers, gripping her hand firmly and proudly before she'd completely passed her by, looking back over her shoulder with hope and pain in her eyes.

_Melissa straightened the band around Calleigh's middle, ensuring the black silk was flat across her midsection before stepping around behind her to tie the small black bow and running her fingers down the dress to be sure the black train was straight and not pulled. Then Calleigh turned around, Ana handed her the bouquet and all three women stepped back to admire her. She and Carmen had managed to find the perfect dress that both matched the scarf and Calleigh's own, elegant sense of style. With the ivory silk chiffon that formed an almost heavy, wavy skirt and the black silk band, Calleigh felt like a princess as she stepped down from her small podium and into her shoes. They weren't as high as her regular stilts, as Eric liked to call them, but they were pointed and they had class and her father had spared no expense._

_She'd wondered briefly, if his insistence on paying for her entire outfit had been his way of apologising for years of distrust but the thought had left her quickly. And it was replaced by an unbridled joy that went hand in hand with her appreciation for the love and support he'd given her and the strength she'd always believed he harbored somewhere, by showing he hadn't touched a drop of alcohol since her diagnosis._

_She was proud of him and by the way he looked into her eyes when he stepped into the room, she knew that he was proud of her and she was happy, because she felt that the wedding had come about at just the right time in their lives, so that it could be truely appreciated. And she didn't even want to dwell on the one thing that could have made it even better._

Calleigh's fingers twitched as Duke passed her hand to Eric's, as she felt the warmth of his touch and noticed the smile in his eyes as he looked down at her. "Hey," He whispered, stepping up to her and forgetting about the world around him, for just that moment.

"Hey." She answered, smiling shyly through her eyelashes and blushing when he curled his fingers through hers. She couldn't recall a time when she'd ever, really been nervous around him but as he was running his fingers delicately along her wrist, she couldn't help the butterflies that fluttered around in her belly.

"You look beautiful."

She looked right up at him then, smiling brightly and squeezing his hand as she breathed. "Thank you."

Eric's eyes didn't leave her for the entire ceremony and she didn't even complain that he wasn't looking at the minister when he was supposed to be. No one would notice, she decided and if they did, they were all too happy for them, to fault him. She barely took her eyes off their hands, by comparison, except when her name was spoken and the long chain of a white-beaded rosary was placed around both of them, symbolically binding them.

They whispered their promises to each other and Calleigh's heart practically beat out of her chest as Eric turned to her, holding both of her hands in his and pulling her closer. The silent room seemed to hush to the point where she couldn't even hear a single breath that didn't come from his lips as he carefully formed the words of a poem written for her.

_"You are my best friend, you are my teacher. When we met, you laughed at me and I said - We'll see. You have protected me, I will protect you. From whatever monsters that are here or yet to be. You are my hero, you are my star. And you will no longer walk alone - because beside you there is me. And together, we are we."_

By the time he'd finished, Calleigh's eyes were glistening. And when he reached up to brush one single tear from her cheek, she caught his hand and adoringly kissed the back of his fingers. Eric grinned, holding his hand in place with hers as the minister declared them husband and wife and with a tug on her hand, resting it in his against his chest, he snaked his other around her waist so that he could lean in and press a simple, chaste kiss to her quivering lips.

She breathed him in, arching her back just a little as she pressed her body against his. She could feel the lapels of his suit jacket against her bare shoulders and she smiled against his mouth at the sound of everyone in the church, rising to their feet with applause and a few very distinctive wolf-whistles. The first thing she saw when she opened her eyes, was his face smiling down at her and she matched it with a giggle and he squeezed her shoulders, turning them both as the cheers only grew louder. And then he had her hand and he was dashing back down the aisle. Calleigh laughed, hitching her dress just enough to keep pace with him as tulip petals were thrown into the air and all of their nieces stood by the doors in their matching pink dresses, blowing bubbles that followed them as they burst out of the church.

* * *

**_Now I can rest my worries and always be sure  
That I won't be alone anymore._**

**_

* * *

_**

The reception was on the sand of Miami beach. The sun was just going down and through the sheer white drapes of the open marquee, the setting sun cast an orange glow. When they arrived, Calleigh greeted everyone in her path, doling out kisses and hugs and 'thank you's'. Eric followed her, with his hands on her hips and a smug - so proud of himself- smile. Calleigh paused in her greetings, to lean back into his chest and he took the moment to place a kiss to the curve of her neck, just shy of her collar bone and Calleigh shrieked when she caught the flash of a camera in the corner of her eye, looking up to see Natalia with a camera in her hand and a smirk of her face, as she dipped behind Horatio.

They laughed, moving over to them and Calleigh smiled, wrapping her arms around Horatio's neck as he hugged her. Smiling and whispering congratulations in her ear, before moving to recieve a manly half-hug from Eric. As they made their way towards their table, they were stopped by Alexx and her need to kiss them practically all over their faces, by Wyatt lifting Calleigh up off the ground as he hugged her and by Carmen and Pavel, kissing each of them on both cheeks before Carmen guided Calleigh to her seat beside her father and Eric was pushed into his between Calleigh and his mother.

_Sitting in the backseat of the limousine with Eric's arms around her waist, Calleigh laughed when he kissed the nape of her neck, whispering her new name against her skin. She liked the sound of it, especially when it came from his lips and as she snuggled into his side, smiling at the way her dress took up most of the backseat, she kissed the edge of his jaw. "What do you think? Should I change it to Officer Delko at work?" Calleigh smirked and Eric chuckled, fiddling with the black silk around her waist._

_"I don't know, it might make things on paper look like I never left."_

_Calleigh released a soft sigh, placing her hand over his against her stomach. "That small idea would make me feel better about going to work everyday." She whispered and Eric snuggled her, kissing her temple softly._

_"Hey," He smiled. "but you get to come home to this," He lent back and started undoing the top buttons on his shirt. He got to the third before, with a giggle, Calleigh stilled his hand and pointed out the window._

_"That'll have to wait, the entire cuban population of Miami is waiting outside the car."_

_Eric glanced over his shoulder, smirking at her over-exaggeration. "That's just my cousins."_

_"My point exactly." Calleigh raised an eyebrow and he laughed, taking her hand as he climbed out of the car, pulling her with him._

Calleigh grinned as Pavel stood before her, holding his hand out for her as the sound of a very familiar and very traditional Cuban beat played throughout the darkening marqee as the string lights all around the tent flickered on. Inclining her head gently, she took his hand and let him lead her out onto the dance-floor and guide her to the center. Wyatt watched as they danced, as the music picked up and he tried to work out, what exactly was going on. Calleigh was in he center of the dance-floor, her hands were in Pavel's but as he watched Carmen make her way across the room behind them, she tapped men on the shoulders and one after the other, they joined the floor.

He'd never seen anything like it, from one to the other, his sister was passed around the floor, happily dancing with each and every one. She laughed and spun and he caught Melissa's happy smile out of the corner of his eye as she was watching Calleigh's dress spinning around behind her. By the time Carmen made it back around to their table, he was caught up in the fun of it, but was still, utterly confused. "What is this?" He questioned her, taking the woman's hand and pulling her between him and his wife. She grinned widely, holding up between them, a cushion filled with pins.

"Take one," She instructed. "it's tradition that the men of the family dance with the bride and then," She pointed out to the floor, where Pavel was spinning Calleigh with their hands above her head, before he brought her to a stop and pulled out a one-hundred dollar bill and pinned it to her dress. "when each man dances with her, they pin a gift of money to her dress. It is an old tradition and the money is for their honey-moon or the start of their new life."

"That's lovely." Melissa commented, receiving a grateful smile from Carmen as Wyatt pulled a pin from the cushion.

"Sounds fun to me." He grinned, jumping up from the table and making his way through to Calleigh. She shrieked with laughter when she set her eyes on him, dropping Ryan's hands with a smile as she wrapped her arms around her brother. And they both laughed, when a pair of young, dark hands pulled at her skirt because Ade wasn't as subtle as he'd hoped.

"Sorry," He muttered, looking contrite at the idea of ruining their moment.

"It's alright," Calleigh grinned, leaning over - though her arm was still around Wyatt's neck - to press a kiss to Ade's cheek. "thank you." She smirked, seeing that he'd gone to the effort of pinning three notes to her dress. Ade ran off in the direction of Eric and upon seeing her husband's face, Calleigh laughed and blew him a kiss. He was hating that she was in the middle of all the fun and that he, much to his mother's insistence, was standing on the sideline and waiting for his moment to jump in there and whisk her off her feet. Calleigh danced with her brother and he whispered compliments in her ear before pulling a note from his pocket and pinning it to the strap of her dress. She smirked, rolling her eyes as he wandered away. She was surprised though, when the next man to pull her into his embrace, was Horatio with a rather uncharacteristically wide grin.

When the dance finally came to a stop and Calleigh felt like a walking teller machine, it was Frank that Eric had to fight for Calleigh. He won of course, considering Frank's wife sitting at their table, chatting with Alexx, had a look on her face that implied she'd wanted to dance for the last half hour.

"I'm not letting you go now." Eric commented, holding her around the waist possessively and Calleigh chuckled.

"Is that so?" She questioned, kissing him back as he dipped his head to touch his lips to hers.

"That's so."

"What about if my Dad wants to dance?" She pouted and Eric rolled his eyes.

"Well, maybe, I suppose."

"And there is a young girl just over there," She pointed behind him and Eric turned them. "who has been eyeing you all night."

He laughed heartily then, seeing his ten-year-old niece Lily, fiddling with the bows on her dress and watching them dance. "You might want to watch out," Eric joked, swaying her from side to side. "she's awfully pretty."

"Little young, don't you think?" She wrinkled her nose and Eric laughed, spinning them around and waving the little girl over. With Calleigh still in his arms, he laughed when Lily came bounding towards them with a vibrant smile on her face.

"She's certainly enthusiastic." Eric winked and Calleigh laughed, reaching down to run her fingers through Lily's thick curls as the little girl hugged them.

"Do you want to dance with your Tio?" Calleigh asked the girl and she nodded, excitedly. "Okay,"

"Wait, Cal," Eric protested but as Calleigh stepped out of his hold, Lily already had her arms around his waist and Calleigh was grinning.

"Dance with her, it'll be fun." She kissed him quickly, before dashing across the room to her father, pulling on his hands until he reluctantly followed her onto the dance-floor.

* * *

_**I lose my way, And it's not too long before you point it out.  
I cannot cry, Because I know that's weakness in your eyes.  
I'm forced to fake, A smile, a laugh everyday of my life.  
My heart can't possibly break, When it wasn't even whole to start with.  
**~ Because of you, _Kelly Clarkson

* * *

Tucking her dress behind her legs, Charlotte sat down on the ridge of sand. She listened to the sound of the reception behind her and watched as the waves crashed against the shore in the moonlight. She hadn't seen Calleigh, face to face, since the moment they'd shared at the church and she'd been grateful at the time, that Calleigh had found it in her heart to forgive her by the simple act of touching her hand. She'd felt like a mother in that moment grateful to look upon such a beautiful daughter and know that she'd had a hand in her life. But watching the faces of the people surrounding her, the warm family of her daughter's new husband and the protective circle of friends adoring her, she could see how small and insignificant her hand had been.

She was the reason that Calleigh glanced over her shoulder everywhere she went. She was the reason she questioned every selfless gesture. She was the reason she was so suspicious of everyone in her life. But she was glad, as she looked over her shoulder to see through the crowd, that her daughter had her arms around her husband's neck and she was smiling so unabashedly, that she'd found a way to push through the shadows of her past. And she was grateful to Eric for the beautiful smile on her daughter's face. A smile that she'd never really seen before.

_Charlotte sat on the sofa with a bottle of wine rested on the coffee table and a glass dangling from her hand. She'd watched Calleigh make her way up the front steps and on the inside, she'd smiled at the way the young man with dark hair and a cleanly pressed check-shirt, held her hand and guided her up the steps. She'd watched, of what she could see and she'd bit her lip as she waited for her to come through the door. She knew what was happening on the other side, she knew that her daughter was lost in the sparkling, awkward moment that could make or break her first kiss and she was happy, in a slightly drunken haze. But as the door creaked open and Calleigh's converse stepped over the threshold, annoyance bubbled over in her and she wanted nothing more than to grab her by the collar of her black jacket, pulling her inside, and slam the door in the boy's face. _

_Instead, she waited for Calleigh to close the door before clambering up from the couch. "You're late." She slurred and Calleigh, with her disdainful eyes, looked her up and down before heading towards the stairs. Not taking kindly, that she was being ignored, Charlotte grabbed her arm and spun her back around to face her. "I said, you're late."_

_"And you're drunk." Calleigh answered, pulling her arm from her mother's hold and backing towards the stairs. "Daddy knew what time I'd be home. I told him earlier. It's not my fault that you don't talk."_

_"Not your fault?" Charlotte spat and Calleigh furrowed her brow, backing into the wall just by the stairs. "I had options," She growled, edging closer to Calleigh. "I was beautiful and talented and now," She waved her wine glass in front of her. "and now I'm too old to do anything I wanted to do."_

_"Are you saying that you blame me?" Calleigh choked, fearing her answer, but she needed to know._

_"I was pregnant at seventeen," She stepped up to Calleigh, so close that she could feel her breath against her face and smell the vestiges of the whiskey she'd downed before she'd settled for wine. "I dropped out of school."_

_"How can you blame me? I wasn't born."_

_"No," Her mother tripped slightly on the rug. "but look at you now, out there shaking your hips at those boys, flicking your pretty hair. You don't even care what I had to give up."_

_"I don't shake my-"_

_Her mother cut her off, making a sound of disgust as she stumbled back into the lounge to refill her glass. "How dare you!" Calleigh yelled, following her into the room. She was nearly sixteen and over the past three years, Charlotte had watched her backbone strengthen. A part of it, she could see, had come from how Wyatt had spurted up and now towered over them both, offering some form of protection to his older sister. But for the most part, she knew, that it was make or break for the girl who'd grown to be so unlike her. "How dare you blame me for the dreams you threw down the toilet!"_

_"And what did I get for my sacrifices? An ungrateful daughter who has no respect for me."_

_"Maybe I'd have respect for you," Calleigh cried, with tears pouring from her eyes. "if once, just once, I could bring a friend home and be unafraid that you'll embarrass me or yourself." She didn't wait for Charlotte to respond and she didn't even speak to her brother as she dashed up the stairs and slammed her bedroom door behind her._

Calleigh stepped down into the sand from the sure footing of the temporary floor and with her skirt hitched up, she kicked her shoes off and rested them beside a post before making her way down the beach. She could see the back of her, silhouetted against the gently lapping waves and on hesitant legs, she headed towards her. She tried to focus more on the feeling of the sand between her toes than the impending doom of facing her mother, but the closer she got and the darker it became - to the point where the only light shining on them was the faint glow of the party behind and the moon hanging over the horizon ahead - all she could really see was the white of the flower in her hair and the outline of her face, as she turned and smiled up at her, near imperceptibly.

"Hi," She smiled, bunching her gown around her knees as she sat down beside her.

"Hi." Charlotte answered, licking her lips and brushing an invisible hair behind her ear. "You look stunning, by the way."

"Thanks." Calleigh whispered, still not quite sure how to take her mother's sudden appearance at the wedding and rather unwilling to ask how she'd found out when it was happening.

"I didn't want," Charlotte paused, glancing out to the horizon and taking a deep breath. "even after everything, I didn't want to miss today. And I was hoping," She looked down at her feet. "that there might be a chance that we could start over."

"It's not going to be that easy." Calleigh whispered, keeping her eyes trained on the side of her face, deciding that the last thing she could do, was back down now.

"I know," Charlotte looked up, meeting her eyes. "but I really want to try."

"Hey Cal," Eric's voice from behind them caused Calleigh to spin around in her spot, but when they both looked up at him, he stopped in his tracks. "Oh, sorry. Did you," He pointed behind him. "Did you want me to come back?"

"No," Charlotte smiled. "no, it's alright."

"It's just, Natalia's whinging about the whole garter-belt thing and the bouquet throwing and she and Valera have started chanting and it's really not pretty and they've been downing champagne like soda."

Calleigh laughed heartily, using her mother's offered hand to help her stand before carefully climbing her way back up the sand-dune towards her husband. After reaching his hands, she stopped and she turned, smiling down at Charlotte. "Are you coming?"

"No, I think I'll just sit here a little while." She smiled, waving them off.

"Oh, I don't think so," Eric smirked, dropping Calleigh's hands to dash forward and lift her effortlessly to her feet. Charlotte shrieked with surprise, but grinned when he placed a kiss to her cheek and led her back over to Calleigh. "come and enjoy the party."

Charlotte waited for Calleigh's nod of approval and smiled, following them as they made their way back to the party. They were greeted with cheers and smiles and the sound of half-drunken best friends screaming for Calleigh to throw the bouquet. She laughed gently, as Calleigh was pushed into a chair and the crowd erupted with laughter at Eric's face, when he was instructed to remove the garter belt - that was assumed to be around Calleigh's thigh - but to his great surprise, and Calleigh's great amusement, he found the industrial black strap of a thigh-holster sporting a pint-sized handgun and he was going to have to bite at it with his teeth. Calleigh giggled, dangling her ankle in front of him as he threw her a wilting look that only caused her to pout sarcastically and give him no chance of wriggling his way out of the situation.

He was thankful though, for the velcro and laughed, letting the holster drop from his teeth into her lap as he grabbed her by the waist and practically clambered up her body, to press a kiss to her lips.

Charlotte was happy and smiling at the way they seemed to look at each other with a raw and unconditional adoration and she was glad, that after all her daughter had suffered, she had found that elusive light at the end of a very long, dark and lonely tunnel. The bouquet was thrown and caught somewhere in the fray of flailing female limbs a friend of Calleigh's was smiling brightly and Charlotte drifted slowly to the back of the crowd as the bride and the groom were followed out to the awaiting limousine.

They waved their goodbyes and the idea that her daughter, her only daughter was happier than she ever could have made her, made her knees weaken and her head spin just a little. Nothing was said of Calleigh's disease or fears and not a pair of loving eyes were cast her way in pity or sympathy for the entire night. Charlotte was sure she would be grateful for that but a part of her also thought that with the glow in Calleigh's eyes, there wasn't a chance she would have noticed any look that wasn't a smile or a loving glance from Eric.

And she was sure, that the crowd of people surrounding the limo and waving back to them as they drove away, were just as happy and proud as her in that moment.

TBC.


	16. Chapter 16

Well, the premiere was pretty awesome. I had to wait over 18 hours to get the episode because my computer is so crazy slow and even then, it restarted twice and I even slept through the last 8 hours of waiting. All for some very, VERY worthy Calleigh scenes and some fairly watchable scenes with everyone else. I was expecting a little more from it, considering there had been a lot of talk about certain scenes that didn't actually happen, which disappointed me. Like, there was mention of a scene with Calleigh and Frank back in '97, which wasn't in the show and I was bummed about that and then there was also talk about a choice Calleigh had to make, which didn't happen. But you know what, that gives me hope, because it means sources aren't completely accurate and they can get things wrong. Like the nature of a person's departure or the meaning of a certain comment. So I hold out hope for something and still DO NOT want to be spoiled. (Regardless, this story has become my own personal canon and I can pick and choose aspects of the show I find relevent and leave out the ones I don't like, aka, Tara being permanent and anything else that doesn't mesh with my world. Yes, I'm being petulant, but we all can be from time to time.)

Oh and for the record. I know nothing about acquiring a business license, so please accept my apologies if what I've written isn't actually possible. We'll just say it's possible in this world.

New chapter! I hope you enjoy.

* * *

Humming along to the sound of the Black Eyed Peas pumping through her stereo, Valera danced her way over from her computer to her work-bench. There was a pile of evidence envelopes in what could be described as her 'in-tray' and a half a dozen there-in, that were considered first priority. Mostly it was just CSIs big-noting themselves, attempting to make her believe that their case was paramount to all the others. What they didn't know, was that she wasn't stupid and that she could deduce, from the case-file attached, which cases were more important than the others. It wasn't an exact science, because a lot of the time she was wrong, but when a victimless car-jacking was up against a triple homicide, it was a no-brainer.

Snipping the tip off a swab, she smiled as she heard the sound of people bustling around the halls outside her lab, over the music, followed by the sound of heels clacking on the floor and the door closing between them and the rest of the crime-lab. "Hey, Maxine, how did you go with the tissue sample Ryan collected from under the victim's nails? Horatio wanted me to check on it before I leave." The cheery voice questioned and Valera smiled as she dialed the music down.

"Well, well," She looked up to the smiling eyes of the other woman. "the prodigal daughter returns. And what, not so much as _'I missed you, Maxine'_ or _'I brought you back a t-shirt'_? And no pictures? I'm hurt."

Calleigh giggled, blushing a little as she shrugged her shoulders. "I'm sorry, Max, we did miss you. And I did get you a little something, it's in my lab. Though I will apologise in advance that it's not an 'I love New York' t-shirt. We just couldn't find them."

Valera laughed, rolling her eyes. "Yeah, right, and I believe that."

"It's the truth," Calleigh defended.

"They sell them on practically every street corner. I bet you didn't even leave the room." Valera gave her a knowing smirk and Calleigh blushed a little more, averting her eyes.

"Well it was the Penthouse." She finally relented, sharing a conspiratorial smirk with her friend.

"Okay then," Valera laughed. "I take back what I said about wanting pictures. Anyway, your sample was not human tissue, something synthetic. I sent it over to Trace."

"Alright, thanks Max." Valera nodded as Calleigh turned around to leave but as she stopped in the doorway and turned back to her, smiling, Valera's brow furrowed. "Are you sure you don't want those pictures? Eric's very photogenic." She jested and Valera played up a disgusted shudder before she laughed out loud, waving her friend off as the shorter woman disappeared through the door.

* * *

Eric shook his head with a chuckle as he filled out the application for a business license. They'd talked about it quite a lot over the course of their honeymoon, when they weren't preoccupied or out to dinner or shopping - because Calleigh said she needed new shoes, like that was even possible - and eventually, with a grape in her mouth and a grin on her lips, Calleigh had come up with the name that he was currently jotting down on the line.

"Aventura Salvaje Reef Tours?" The clerk questioned, appearing to not be as fluent in spanish as Calleigh by the way he stumbled over the pronounciation and clearly, wasn't sure what it meant.

"My wife," Eric laughed, still loving the sound of saying that. "she came up with it. It means, 'wild adventure'."

"Hmm," The clerk nodded, checking over the rest of the form to make sure everything was in order. "so your wife's Cuban too?" Chit chat wasn't really his thing, but Eric felt overwhelmed to participate, especially when the subject matter was Calleigh.

"Actually, no," He smirked. "quite the opposite." The man looked up at him a little confused and Eric smiled. "She's southern. You know, everyday's a party as long as you've got a Mimosa. Sweet tea and sugary smiles, she's a belle, for sure."

"Right," The guy nodded, obviously lacking in a sense of humour and Eric's gentle laughter fell flat. "alright, well, everything seems to be fine here. You can rest easy, Mr Delko, your approval should go through sometime this afternoon and we'll have your license sent FedEx in the next few days."

Eric stared. "That easy?"

"Well, in your case, yes. You're a fully accredited diver, former police officer and you have a current boat license. It's a slam-dunk. Now, if you were opening a Gourmet donut house, we'd have questions."

"Well, alright," Eric grinned, drumming his fingers on the edge of the desk. "thank's a lot."

He walked out of the office and onto the sunny street, feeling a little lighter. He'd walked in with trepidation, even though Calleigh had insisted everything would go fine, for the very same reasons the clerk had listed and a few other's. He was excited, and he was nervous. Because apart from being a cop, and even that was mostly Horatio's doing, he'd never been anything else but a tow-truck driver in the 'glades. He'd been happy back then, he could see three feet in front of his face and as far as life went, he didn't look much further. He had girlfriends, plural, and he had lived a lifestyle that was commitment and obligation free. He'd liked it, but there was always that little something at the back of his mind that poked at him to try something new, take a longer leap and he was quick to admit now, that it had been the idea of seeing the blond from the parking lot, every day, that had driven him to the Academy and through three years of training.

He hadn't gotten around to thanking Horatio yet, for insisting that he could do it, for promising him a spot on his team, because if it hadn't been for him, most of the amazing aspects of his life would have never happened. If he rolled it all back to that moment on the steps of MDPD, where a pair of sunglasses made two aquaintences friends, he'd also have to say that Horatio was responsible for all the bad too. But that was where he would insist he had a hand in his own circumstances. Horatio didn't shoot him in the head, didn't set fire to a house Calleigh and Ryan were in. He gave the ball a gentle shove with his offer and Eric had kept it rolling on his own, since then.

Now he was embarking on a new adventure and while he knew he still had Calleigh, he couldn't help but miss working at the lab. He didn't regret it though, Calleigh and their life together, was worth any sacrifice and he knew that. But it didn't make the loss any easier to bear.

* * *

**_You are the light, in to my soul.  
You are my purpose. You're everything.  
And how can I stand here with you, and not be moved by you.  
_**~ _Everything_, Lifehouse

* * *

"You're late," Calleigh smirked, reaching for his hand as he made his way through the double doors. "I was beginning to think you weren't coming."

"I'm sorry," Eric pulled her into his side and kissed her lips quickly. "I had so much work to do on the boat and I had to go down to the licensing office. You're the one back at work and I'm the one run off my feet, it's weird isn't it?"

Calleigh giggled, pulling him through the door and taking her usual seat as Eric sat down across from her. "It's alright. Did you get the logos printed?" It made the excitement greater in him, that she was so into the idea of his little business and so involved. She'd drawn up the logos in the week they'd had at home after New York and he was surprised to learn that she was fairly talented, as far as design went. She could draw, that much was for sure and her design for the logo on the boat was tasteful, not cheesy or easily miss-conceived.

"Yeah, I did. I dropped them off at my parent's on my way here."

"How are they?"

Eric barked a laugh and gripped her hand, pulling it to his lips to kiss her fingers. "Mom's already begging for Nietos." And Calleigh smiled, patting his hand. Normally, she'd have laughed along with him but the thought of chrildren had been very close to the front of her mind for a while. When she was diagnosed, it was a breif, heart-fluttering thought but when he'd proposed, it had become a major issue on top of everything else that brewed in her head. Lost amongst the worries that were never let free. Her doctor had explained all of the possibilities to her, he'd explained that she carried an abnormality in her BRCA1 gene and that the probability of her cancer returning, was of the highest in Breast Cancer sufferers. Prevention was key and in her situation, she was afraid that the choices for that prevention were going to be the most drastic she'd feared.

Her doctor had been rather tight-lipped about it in their phone conversations over the week leading up to her final round of Chemo and she was worried, because while she was there in the room, they were going to have to talk about the next step. She'd had an MRI the week before and she was waiting, rather impatiently on the results because they were going to help determine the next course of action.

"Good afternoon, Calleigh," The doctor grinned, making his way into the room as the nurse fiddling with Calleigh's IV, finished up and left. "Eric." He inclined his head in greeting and Eric nodded, instinctually squeezing Calleigh's hand. They were used to each other by now, after eight months of being treated by Doctor Barlow, they were accustomed to him and he'd grown fond of them too. "I haven't seen you in a while," He smirked, opening her file. "I heard from one of my nurses, that the two of you got married, congratulations."

Calleigh blushed. "Thanks."

"So," Dr Barlow took a deep breath, resting his elbows on top of the file on his knees. "how have you been feeling?"

"Pretty great, actually." Calleigh smiled. "I'm mean, I've been tired and I still get nauseas but I think I'm still on a bit of a high from the wedding and everything."

The doctor nodded, happily. "Well, that's probably, best. They say that joy is the greatest medicine and in your case, while it's not a cure, it's certainly a great booster." He clasped his hands together. "Okay, so, you know what I'm here to talk to you about."

Calleigh nodded and Eric glanced at the side of her face, seeing her eyes set firmly on the doctor.

"Well, what I want to talk to you about, Calleigh, is a pretty big deal."

Eric's hold on her hand tightened and Calleigh attempted to soothe him by pressing her other hand on top of his. The doctor noticed and he tried to avert his eyes back to her face, but as he realised she'd looked into her husband's eyes with worry, he licked his lips and felt guilty. This part of the job had never been his favourite and he'd had patients before that couldn't handle the pain. He had faith that this couple could, but he still feared for each and every family he left in his wake of bad and worse news.

"What," She swallowed. "what is it?"

"Here," He held out her file and instead of Calleigh reaching for it like he'd thought, Eric took it from his hand and rested it in his lap where the pair of them could see the MRI scans. "It may not look like much, but you're both scientists so I thought it would be beneficial that you can see it with your own eyes."

"What's that?" Eric questioned, looking up into Doctor Barlow's eyes whilst pointing at a spot on the scan.

"It's a lump," Calleigh's breath caught in her throat and both men looked to her, though she didn't speak. "now it is benign, but Calleigh, you of all people know that we can't take chances. The odds that it was benign were already a million to one."

"That's," She faltered. "that's not my left breast. That's not where the original cancer was."

Dropping his chin to his chest, the doctor shook his head. "No, it's not."

"So," She took a deep breath, holding Eric's hand so tight it almost hurt. "what are you saying?"

"I'm saying, that you need to seriously consider a Double Mastectomy. Right now, your cancer hasn't spread to the rest of your body and the chemo is doing it's job. But I really feel I need to urge you to consider this option."

Calleigh bit down hard on her lip, turning her watery eyes away from the Doctor and even Eric, whose breathing was as eratic as her's and whose hand, was quivering against her fingers. "You'd," Eric's breath hitched. "you'd remove her-" He couldn't finish his sentence and at hearing the pain in his voice, Calleigh turned back to him.

"We would remove the tissue from both breasts and replace it with what we call, expanders, which will help the muscle grow to accomdate implants. The procedure has really advanced in the last few years and the research is good, Calleigh, and it would cut the chances of recurrance in half."

"You said," Calleigh fiddled with an invisible pull in the fabric of her pants. "you said in the beginning, that my cancer was estrogen-receptive," Doctor Barlow nodded, he knew where this was going, because he knew as soon as she'd been diagnosed, Calleigh had read all she could on the topic. The pair had even admitted to researching it together, which hadn't surprised him by the way Eric seemed to be so attentive to her every need, ache or discomfort. "then, if I'm only going to get worse..."

"I know it's hard, Calleigh," He reached forward and Eric watched him gently take hold of Calleigh's other hand, looking down at the delicate rings on her finger. "you're newly married and I'm sure the pair of you have plans, but removal of your ovaries, as well, would greatly reduce your risk. Time is not in abundance for this disease, you know that. You've known from the start of all this, that your fertility can't be my main concern."

Silence descended upon the room and Calleigh did her best not to meet Eric's eyes. She knew that he was looking at her, they both were and she could feel it. But worse was the feeling that she'd seen this coming. She was happy and she was married to the kindest man she'd ever known. She had her job and her home and she had a family that genuinely cared for her. It wasn't in her luck, for such things to last. She honestly didn't know what she'd expected and she felt that she shouldn't really have been surprised that it'd come down to this. And that brief moment wasn't the first time, the idea of children had tugged at her heart violently.

She and Eric hadn't talked about it at any great length. He knew that she was scared and he'd allowed her, her space. But she knew that he wanted children, he'd always wanted children, because that was the way of his family. They all had so much love to give, Eric included, and they all wanted nothing more that to share that love with a tiny new member of their community. The thought of raising her children in his family, was the warmest one she'd ever had and the thought of all of that being taken away from her, was the coldest she could ever fathom.

And she realised, on a breath, that she was standing nose to nose with her very last chance.

"What if," Calleigh swallowed, whispering in a raspy voice as she slowly raised her head to look the doctor in the eye. "what if it's mine."

"Cal," Eric protested, but she pulled her hand from his, resting it in her lap. He looked hurt and confused and the doctor bit his lip, trying to think of the right words.

"Calleigh, this is a big decision and if you wait-"

She cut him off. "But it is, my decision, right? How long could I wait?"

"If you're not pregnant within the year, then-" He stopped short.

"We need to think about this, Calleigh." Eric whispered and the doctor stood, cutting off Calleigh's reply with the suffle of his chair.

"I'm going to leave you two to talk, I'll come back when your round is complete, alright." Calleigh nodded and turned her eyes to the window, not watching him leave and doing her best to avoid looking at Eric. She didn't want him to see how conflicted she was and she didn't want to see, how hurt he felt.

"Cal," He breathed and she shuffled in her chair, watching the leaves of the tree rustling just outside the window. "Cal, please look at me." Slowly, she turned around, raising her eyes reluctantly to meet his and in them she could see everything she was afraid to see and so much more. Tears were coating her cheeks and the edge of her eyes were red and puffy, but she hadn't cried, just simply let the tears run.

"I can't do it, Eric."

"Hey," He took her hand again, pulling it into his lap and ignoring the way she tried to twist free. "you're going to be okay."

"Eric," Her look grew firm as her resolve to keep her decision strengthened. "Please," She sobbed. "don't make me give up this chance." Her voice was breathy and her hands were unsteady. "I need this, Eric."

He shook his head, trying to swallow his own pain as he gripped her hand tighter, edging closer until he could reach up and press his palm to her cheek, brushing her tears away as he whispered. "But I need _you, _I can't imagine living my life without you. We've only been married three weeks, Cal, we're not ready for this and I don't want to risk losing you."

"Ready or not ready can't matter anymore, Eric, now or never is the only choices we've got and I for one do not want to give up the chance for us to have our own baby."

"There is adoption," He choked, terrified when she looked away from him. "there are choices, Cal. I don't want to barter with your life like this."

"Eric, I don't expect you to understand." She hissed and he was slightly taken aback. "They're going to cut out my breasts, my ovaries and they're going to take away everything about me that makes me a woman, they're going to do surgery and I'm going to have to take pills and diet and it's going to _hurt. _And I'll do it," She waved her hands. "I'll do it all, but I will not, ever, throw away this chance." Her voice suddenly softened. "To have a baby, Eric," She smiled with hope, holding his hand in both of hers. "a baby, _our_ baby. Please, don't take that away. Don't," She swallowed. "Of all the things I have to give up, don't make this be one of them. I need you to believe we can do it."

Eric was hesitant. He wanted children and more than anything else in the world, he wanted them with her. But the thought that it could come down to her or the baby, terrified him to the point of chills. But she wanted it, so badly. He was afraid to ask if she wanted it for him, because not only would it not be entirely true, but the guilt would consume him knowing she thought he'd ever think of a beautiful idea as more important than her, here and now. More important than her being in his arms, thirty years from now.

"Calleigh,"

She cut him off "I need you to trust me, Eric."

Her eyes were wide open and clear as the ocean. They were rimmed with red that only made them glow brighter and with the feel of her shaking fingers against his, he knew that she was as scared as he was. It comforted him a little, to know that and it made him understand that she wasn't treading on this lightly. She'd given it a lot of thought and it made him realise what he should have earlier. She wouldn't be Calleigh if she hadn't already weighed the pros and cons months before that moment.

"Cal, you know I'll," He stumbled over his words, breathing deeply as he kissed her hand. "you know I'll be with you, every step of the way."

"Okay," She breathed through a smile. "so we're going to do this."

"Yeah," His smile was a little more hesitant but the fact she felt she could do it, helped him greatly to clamber past the fear. "we're going to do this." And he pressed his forehead to hers, holding her head in his hands as she kissed his nose. And he smiled genuinely then, because he was constantly amazed by her.

TBC.


	17. Chapter 17

Hey guys, It's a bit of a short one, I know. But I hope you all enjoy, nonetheless. I've got another day of freedom tomorrow, before the big job interview on Sat so I'm really hoping to perhaps get another chapter out then. Here's to hoping, hey?

* * *

Horatio stood on the very end of the pier. The wind was gusting upwards and his jacket flapped around behind him as he readjusted his glasses on the bridge of his nose. He smiled, when he turned and he saw the back of a dark-haired head, hanging over the side of a boat to his left. He recognised him straight away, because the pang of discomfort that came every time he saw that very distinctive scar, was the same as every single time he looked into his Brother-in-law's eyes and wished there was something he could have done, that would have stopped all the pain he'd suffered on his account.

"So, your wife tells me that your business is booming."

Eric slid back over the side of the boat, leaving the propeller alone for the moment as he shaded his eyes with his hand, looking up at his friend. He smirked, waving his hand as he dragged himself to his feet. "My wife is a liar." He laughed and Horatio chuckled, complying when Eric welcomed him onto the small boat.

"I've never known her to lie to me. But perhaps it was wishful speculation." Horatio quipped.

"She's an artist," Eric shrugged, disappearing into the cabin for a moment, as Horatio climbed over the edge of the boat, resting his hands on his hips. "if she had lied, you'd never know it."

Horatio dipped his chin with a smile and nodded his head as he lowered his voice. "Eric, I need to know," He sat down, accepting the beer that Eric offered him, though he didn't open it, just twisted the bottle between his fingers, staring at a spot on the floor. "is she alright?"

Eric took the seat across from him, pushing a pair of sunglasses onto his nose as he took a swig from his beer. Horatio watched him look out to the ocean for a moment, setting his eyes on the horizon as he rested his elbows on his knees and picked at the label on his beer bottle. "It's harder than we thought," He started, turning his eyes down to focus on his bottle. "I mean, the chemo's over and that's a relief but," He shook his head, not quite sure if he was ready to say it and Horatio, to his credit, nodded his understanding.

"She told me that she might need some time in the next few months."

Eric nodded silently and peeled the edge of the label clean off, scrunching it in a ball and tossing it down into the cabin to be picked up later.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Eric wasn't quite sure. It had been hard enough, coming to the decision with Calleigh and she was the one going through it. He just wasn't quite sure if he was ready to share his fears with an outside observer. He considered Horatio his closest friend and while, he'd shared all secrets with him in the past - after learning it was better for him to share than not - but he wasn't quite sure that he'd be able to get the words out in the best way.

"She, ah," He bit his lip. "the doctor spoke to us, when she had her last treatment." He looked up into Horatio's compassionate face and he took a deep breath. "she's gonna lose everything, H."

Horatio frowned. "She explained to me, rather quickly, what's going to happen. She told me about the surgeries and the baby." He watched Eric's expression change. "But you know Calleigh, she smiled and she went on her way."

"I'm scared, H, I'm _really_ scared."

"As am I," He nodded, removing his glasses so that he could be sure Eric would know his words were genuine. "but you know what? You're going to help her through it. And I'm here, whatever you need."

Eric lifted his head and smiled. "Thanks, H, it means a lot. I'm just scared that we're playing it a little close to the line I mean, we don't have to have a baby, right? If she gets better sooner, we could adopt or we could foster, I'm just terrified that she's taking on too much."

Horatio smiled gently, slipping his glasses back on as the afternoon sun started to glare orange and pink. "She's strong, Eric. Stronger than you or I."

"I know that. I just-"

Horatio cut him off, setting his untouched beer aside as he sighed. "We don't have the perspective to be able to understand what she's going through," Eric met his eyes. "for her reasons, she wants this and the best we can do is support her."

"Yeah," Eric breathed. "I just really want her to have everything she wants. Don't want to see her disappointed."

Horatio smiled, pressing his hands together, resting his elbows on his knees and leaning closer. "Eric, that's how you're supposed to feel."

* * *

_**For once, just let me be,  
For once, you can think of me,  
For once, I'm happy,  
So don't do it, don't ruin it.**_  
~ _Anymore_, Kelly Clarkson

* * *

Calleigh stepped into the diner. It wasn't somewhere she'd been before, just down the sandy street from a small cove off Miami beach, it was quiet on a weekday and a little further away from the Lab than she would have liked but she knew that her mother would have picked the place, to avoid any possible chance of running into her father. But she considered that a little bit of a bonus, because that meant she wasn't going to have to spend the whole hour trying to hold strained conversation with her mother. It had taken over fifteen minutes just to get there and with the way she'd hesitated on her way through the door, she'd cut her break down significantly to the point where she was likely to only have twenty minutes to eat. There went any thought of a satisfying meal.

Stepping up to a booth, Calleigh recognised the back of her mother's head in an instant. Blond hair, a shade whiter than her own though curled instead of straight with a natural wave and pulled up on one side, just about her ear. She turned just a little and Calleigh knew she was listening to the sound of her heels approaching because the diner was so quiet. There was a man at a table three seats down, who looked her over carefully - focusing on the badge and gun at her hip - before turning back to his eggs and the couple sharing coffee down the end of the room seemed too engrossed in each other to care that someone else had entered the room. The waitress smiled and Calleigh inclined her head, taking a deep breath before she slipped into the booth across from her mother.

"Hi," She said softly, looking at her through her lashes as she fiddled with her handbag.

"Hi, Calleigh-girl."

"You wanted to speak to me?" Calleigh smiled up at the waitress as she placed in front of her, a chipped blue mug, and offered her some coffee. Charlotte seemed to hesitate, watching the waitress as she poured Calleigh's coffee, licking her lips and brushing her palms on top her her thighs.

"I just wanted to see you," Charlotte tried a smile, but Calleigh's rather blank expression caused her to glance down at the table-top. "I haven't seen you since the wedding, I wanted to know how you were going."

"I'm happy," Calleigh rasped. "don't," She took a breath, glancing out the window at a palm tree flicking in the wind. "I don't know if I can handle this between us right now, Momma."

"Calleigh,"

Calleigh looked her straight in the eyes. "I'm having a mastectomy."

Charlotte's mouth fell open. "They're going to remove your-"

Calleigh cut her off. "Both, actually." She half smiled before wondering to herself why she was attempting to show her mother she was unaffected. Regardless of how little they got along and how few happy memories Calleigh could remember, her mother did know her and she knew that something like this, would not affect her so lightly as she was attempting to portray. So she swallowed and averted her gaze, blinking away the same tears that came whenever the subject was brought up. "They're going to, um," She paused. "Well, I have to go in for surgery in two weeks and then, the surgery for my ovaries is set for July next year."

"Your ovaries?" Charlotte breathed, not quite sure what to say. All she could do was stare at her daughter. Calleigh was beautiful, she was glowing. Her lips were red and her cheeks were pink, the light on her face made her eyes glow a brighter green than her own. She was still incredibly thin, but she looked healthier and happier and Charlotte could barely comprehend how, she could look so happy with what she'd just heard. "I don't," She shook her head. "This is a lot to take in."

"I know, Momma, but I'm only telling you because I need you to understand that I can't handle this on top of everything else."

The room was silent for a moment, but for the sound of the man's fork against his plate, an AM radio and the sound of a pot boiling somewhere in the kitchen. The waitress was wiping the counter and the couple had just left and Calleigh's eyes were set on her own hands on the table top.

"Calleigh," Charlotte ventured cautiously. "I really want to try and fix this."

"I'm sorry, Momma, but I can't risk it. Eric and I are trying to have a baby. I don't need this" She gestured between them. "right now." Grabbing her handbag, Calleigh placed a bill down on the table for the coffee and carefully stood to leave. But Charlotte's hand on her wrist, stopped her in her tracks.

"Calleigh, please, for the first time in your life, beleive that I want to be here for you."

Slowly, Calleigh slid back into the chair, resting her hands in her lap as she stared down at them and lowered her voice to a tired whisper. "Mom, this is too hard."

"It's not meant to be easy, Calleigh-"

Calleigh looked up quickly. "It could have been. All it would have taken, years ago, was for you to understand what you were doing to us. All you had to do was open your eyes, Mom."

"I have opened my eyes. And if you're really trying to have a baby," Her mom smiled hopefully. "then I want to be here. I don't," She swallowed. "I don't have to be too close, if you don't want me to. But I really want to be here, Calleigh. I want to be here to help you and I want you to be able to forgive me."

Calleigh watched her out of the corner of her eye, thinking it over. She really wasn't sure if she had the energy to fight an uphill battle with her mother, but she was seeing something in her this time, that was different to the way she'd attempted to fix things in the past. Her words sounded genuine and her expression was contrite. "I want that too." Calleigh whispered, because it was true, she did want to forgive her, she always had. The more difficult question, was whether or not she could.

"Then please, let me try."

Calleigh licked her lips and checked her watch, blinking as she looked out to her hummer parked in the lot. "Look, Mom, I have to get back to work." She stood and Charlotte dropped her eyes to the table, believing that Calleigh would just walk away, but the sound of high-heels on battered linoleum didn't reach her ears, so she looked up. And Calleigh was looking down at her with a strange look in her eyes and her bottom lip sucked in. Calleigh felt overwhelmed to give her credit, she was trying and the intent and persistance in her words and eyes, this time, felt considerably different. She wanted, to give her a chance and she knew that Eric would only ask questions and try to convince her to change her mind, if she did anything but. So with a deep breath, she stared at a spot on the wall and made an offer. "Come to dinner, thursday night. Eric's a great cook, you can get to know him and we can talk."

"Thank you," Charlotte whispered.

Calleigh glanced down at her. "Yeah," She said softly, before heading out the door without another word. She knew that she was being cold and the message she'd sent her mother at the wedding, suggested she had more hope that she'd given her today, but Calleigh just couldn't find it in her, to forgive her outright. They had too many skeletons and too many bad habits. She was defensive about it, because mending their relationship had come up in the past and it had always ended with Charlotte's mouth around a bottle and Calleigh alone in a corner of her dark livingroom with a pint of Haagen-Daaz. Forgiveness was not easy for either of them and it was that, Calleigh knew, that made them so very much alike. They were the very definition of Steel Duquesne women and sometimes, Calleigh wished that they could have shared that together instead of constantly throwing it at each other.

* * *

_**Everything she does is beautiful,  
Everything she does, is right.**_  
~ _You and Me_, Lifehouse

* * *

Eric watched her as she crossed the bathroom behind him. Her fingers trailed slowly behind her along the tiled wall and as he watched her lips, he could see them dancing silently to a remembered song. He was brushing his teeth and she'd insisted on keeping him company instead of crawling into the bed like she normally would have. She'd been showered and changed for a while and even though she was wandering around in a soft pink, silk night-gown that didn't really go with her green headscarf, he was more focused on the expression on her face, than the fact that the night-gown barely covered her thigh. She smiled at him, when she caught him watching her reflection and Eric smiled back, never one to pass up the opportunity.

"Was your day alright?" He questioned, before rinsing his mouth and placing his brush back in the cup next to hers.

She shrugged non-commitally and spun around, heading back out into the bedroom. This time, he followed her, wrapping his arms around her waist from behind and resting his chin on her shoulder. Calleigh smiled widely, pressing her palms to his hands over her stomach and wishing that she could stay that way forever, just there, in his arms where she didn't have to make decisions or counter fears.

"You wanna talk about it?" He whispered in her ear and Calleigh's eyes closed, savouring the feeling.

"Not really."

"Alright then," He kissed her shoulder, hugging her tighter. "hey, H came by the Marina today."

"Really?" Her voice brightened, just a little. "did he like the boat?"

"Loved it, and he even suggested he'd consider letting you quit your day job if you wanted to go into graphic design."

Calleigh laughed, leaning back into his chest as he gently rocked them from side to side. "You're messing with me."

"Just a little," He smirked. "but you love it."

"Hmm," Calleigh smiled, turning around in his arms to press her palms to the back of his head and look up into his eyes. "I love something." She grinned, kissing his lips quickly before leaning back. Eric had that look in his eye, that told her she was the only woman on the planet and she had to say, it made every bad thought that had visited her that day, completely disappear. She knew she'd have to tell him her mother was coming for dinner in two days and she knew that she was going to have to face that concept herself, sooner or later. But for the moment, she wanted to lose herself in the feeling of his warm chest pressed to hers, his large arms wrapped tightly around her body and the feeling of her small feet scuffing against the carpet as he eased her back towards the bed. The back of her knees hit soft mattress and she raised an eyebrow at him, as he gently lowered her down. "This better not be what I think it is."

"It's exactly what you think it is, Mrs Delko." He smirked, kissing a trail down her neck and into the dip of her throat. He followed a line across her collar-bone and down until he could feel the slight raise of her scar against his lips, through the silk. He looked up then, meeting Calleigh's green eyes and she smiled, however forcibly as he gently raised his hands to her breasts. She quivered, as his large hands covered her and she stayed completely still as he pressed gentle kisses to her nipples, along her scar and on her other breast, where a scar would soon be. "Making mental notes?" She tried to joke as she raised her hand up to his head, brushing her thumb over the top of his ear and meeting his eyes. But his expression was completely straight.

"No." He whispered, kissing her exposed shoulder.

"Eric," She breathed and he looked up again, running his hands down her sides with as much care as he'd shown her breasts.

"We're gonna be alright, Cal."

Blinking back tears, Calleigh bit her lip and smiled up at him. "I know." Sliding her hand around to the back of his neck so she could pull herself up high enough to press a wanton kiss to his lips, Calleigh pulled herself as close to him as she could, making her intentions clear that she didn't want to talk about it anymore and he was more than happy to oblige her. He captured her lips again, smothering her in kisses as she dragged his shirt up and over his head. Eric pulled the sheets up around them and smirked when Calleigh tried to push them away but he didn't drop the hold he had on her waist as she ground herself against him, wrapping her short legs around his hips and pulling him against her as close as she could manage.

Then as she ran her nails along his spine, Eric remembered that they were trying for a baby and he found himself smiling stupidly into her shoulder, hooking his fingers under the hem of her night-gown and slipping it off her in one swift move. It had taken him over a year to master that and it never ceased to make him proud, the way Calleigh's eyes darkened everytime he tossed it across the room. She chewed on her bottom lip as he towered over her, one hand pressed to the mattress on either side of her head and with her smaller hands clinging to the back of his arms, Eric lowered himself down to place another, more tender kiss, to her lips.

"You took the gun out of under your pillow, right?" He questioned.

Calleigh smirked. "Why?"

"I don't want to roll over on it again. That's all."

"Oh," She laughed. "well yeah, you're in the bed now so I don't need it. I moved it to the nightstand."

Eric chuckled, hugging her body closer again and kissing her lips.

TBC.


	18. Chapter 18

_**True friends stab you in the front.  
**_~ Oscar Wilde

* * *

"RYAN!" Calleigh screamed, dashing around the back of the Hummer. He glanced her way, halting the firing of his weapon as he watched her cross the open line. He panicked, sucking in a deep breath as she stopped to fire. Her orange scarf whipped around her neck and he winced, when she had to duck quickly, running towards him as fast as she could in her heels. He'd told her to stay in the Hummer, and while he'd known that an instruction like that was rather pointless as far as Calleigh was concerned - because she wasn't going to sit there with her head down while he was caught in a fire fight - he had hoped that for once, she might comply.

"I told you to stay in the car." He hissed, biting at his lip and pressing his back into the patrol car as Calleigh glared at him.

"_Told_ me?" Calleigh snapped, pushing him aside and resting her elbows on the hood of the car, firing off three rounds through the broken window of the house, where the suspect was, before dropping back down beside Ryan in a similar position with her back against the car. Though, to keep her designer trousers off the wet asphalt, she was perched on her heels. She couldn't barely beleive that that was what she was concerned about, but she didn't dwell on it. Instead, she had her eyes set on Ryan, breathing heavily and wishing he'd just let it go.

"Horatio said it was my responsibility to keep you out of any situations."

"I'm not a cripple, Ryan." She growled.

"You're not exactly at your best, Calleigh." He narrowed his eyes, flinching as the car shook with the force of bullets impacting the other side. Calleigh glared at him harshly, furrowing her brow tensely as she pressed her lips into a thin line. And Ryan worried, because she had that intense look of defiance in her eyes that he'd only ever seen her use on Horatio or Eric, a look he'd never wanted to conjure in her because it meant she was about to do something reckless, to prove herself. Sometimes he just wished that she could actually _be_ one of the guys, so she could stop feeling that she had to prove she was better than all of them. It made him feel rather inadequate at times, because she was so good at her job and she was a good few inches shorter than him - in heels - and there was absolutely no chance he was ever going to be a better shot than her. She'd suffered a lot, he knew, because she'd jokingly told him about the new-girl jokes she'd endured back in the day. He'd been fresh in the Acadamy at the time, studying for his exams whilst she'd been blowing off sexual innuendo with the butt of her Lady smith but that didn't mean he had no right to insist she wasn't quite up to this. He cared for her, she knew that, but his teeth clenched every time she ignored him and insisted she could handle the things Horatio had destinctly told him, she wasn't allowed to do.

She was sick and she was fatigued and Ryan still felt inadequate because with that dangerous look in her green eyes, she raised herself up again, just high enough to look over the hood, watching the suspect intently in the reflection off the nearest unbroken window, before swiftly throwing her arms to the hood of the car and firing off one, expertly aimed, round. She had more issues going on with her mind and body than he could fathom and she was still a better shot than him.

Silence fell around them as Calleigh dropped back down to his side and Ryan blinked, watching her breathing deeply. "You didn't." He rasped and Calleigh looked at him out of the corner of her eye.

"He shot a police officer, dead, Ryan."

Cautiously looking up over the hood, Ryan dropped back down quickly, pressing his eyes shut as he breathed deeply. "You didn't."

"I had to," She defended. "we weren't going to get him out any other way, Ryan. You know that as well as I do."

"It's clear!" They heard an officer announce and in an instant, Ryan was on his feet, holding his hand down to pull her up. Calleigh took it, immediately making her way back to the Hummer silently and the best he could do, was watch her go. He hated being on Calleigh's bad side, it was the worst place a guy could be because as kind and generous as she was, when backed into a corner, she could do serious damage. Especially if she felt she was being objectified or ridiculed or accused of being anything less than what she was.

He released a long breath and let his shoulders slump as he watched her climb back into the Hummer, making a show of sitting like a well-trained show-dog with her hands in her lap and her eyes turned intentionally in the opposite direction. He rolled his eyes, turning back to the scene and heading inside with the officer because there wasn't a chance he was going to be able to talk to her now and someone needed to cover the scene until Alexx could get there. He had to give her space.

* * *

Ryan hopped out of the hummer quickly, jumping down and opening his mouth to call out to Calleigh but she was gone faster than he could get a word out. She was in the elevator and hitting the button and he wanted to hit himself for being so stupid. He'd crossed the line with her and he'd upset her and that was the last thing he wanted. But it was his job to look out for her, right? That's what Horatio had said. Don't let her do too much. Of course, Ryan hadn't been quick thinking enough to find a way to word it, that would have her wanting to stay out of the line of fire. He'd taken the option of ordering her to do it and that had been the worst decision he could have made. Calleigh Duquesne didn't take orders lightly, especially from those not qualified to give them.

He kicked at the tire of the Hummer, wishing it was his own leg he could kick. And he bit his lip with his hands on his hips, watching her look away from him as the doors to the elevator closed and the numbers above it ticked over. Calleigh was watching it on her side too, shifting from foot to foot and taking deep breaths to calm her nerves. She knew that she as behaving immaturely. Ryan was only doing what he thought he had to do and he was only doing it, because he cared. He only said the things he'd said, because he didn't want to be responsible for anything happening to her. And she did appreciate it, for the most part, she was just sick and tired of everyone treating her as though she was made of porcelain. She knew she shouldn't have joined the fire-fight and she knew she was going to have Horatio track her down later in the day and dip his head the way he did whenever she'd done something he wasn't entirely proud of.

But she didn't care so much. She felt good to be involved and she felt, for the first time in months, that she was actually doing her job. Pressing her palms to the front of her legs, Calleigh took a deep breath as she stepped off the elevator, focusing on the weight of her gun at her hip as she slowly stepped off into the foyer. Wearing a black shirt and black pants, black shoes and an Orange scarf that day, she hoped that she could slip through the foyer unnoticed and disappear into her lab but a man at the reception desk caught her attention as he spoke to the officer.

"Can you tell me where I can find Officer Delko?"

Calleigh's ears pricked up at the name and she abandoned thought of slipping under the radar, instead choosing to step up beside the man and capture his attention. "You're looking for Officer Delko?" She smiled, tilting her head and the man turned to her, smiling and she could feel herself blush just a little at the way he looked her up and down.

"Yeah, is that you?"

Calleigh chuckled lightly. "No, I'm officer Duquesne. Eric's actually my husband. Can I ask why you're looking for him?"

"Well," He looked down at a peice of paper in his hand. "they said I'd be working with him." He held it out to her and Calleigh looked it over, frowning. "I just transferred from the LAPD and they said there was a new spot in Fingerprinting over here."

Calleigh nodded. "Well there is; His spot." She smiled. "You're not going to be working with him, you're replacing him."

"Oh," He wasn't quite sure what to say but as he studied her, he couldn't help but feel there was something about her that he should recognise. Her face seemed familiar and her accent, he knew he'd heard before but he couldn't quite place where he'd met her. "what was your name again?"

"Calleigh Duquesne," She grinned. "dayshift supervisor and expert in tool marks and firearms."

His eyes opened wide in realisation and he blinked rapidly. "I knew I recognised you. You're Calleigh, you're the girl that was just starting here when I left. Man, that was almost twelve years ago."

Calleigh eyed him with confusion. "Jesse?" She asked. "Jesse Cordoza, right?"

"Yeah," He laughed, with that broad white smile. "wow, you look different. But you did say you'd remember my name." And Calleigh laughed.

"Yeah," She nodded. "a lot has changed. Though you don't look a bit different." She touched the ends of her scarf self-conciuously, breathing as she glanced across the lab.

"Oh, I've put on a little weight." He patted his belly and Calleigh looked back to him, smiling lightly.

"Doesn't look it. So, I suppose you'll want to see Horatio?" Jesse nodded and Calleigh smiled. "He's out in the field right now, but I can show you to Eric's old lab."

"That'd be great." He nodded, following her as she pushed off from the desk.

Jesse couldn't barely beleive it. Twelve years ago he'd met her and she seemed so bubbly and green, with that sharp southern edge, but she seemed softer now. Her eyes were wider and her humour was a touch more mellow. Her smile was the same and her accent was just as thick as it had been, fresh out of Jacksonville but there were distinct differences in her demeanor. He honestly hadn't expected her to last, with the attitudes of the Miami lab and the cops there, all calling her "Meter Maid" behind her back and throwing crass innuendos in her face, he hadn't pictured her sticking it out. Though here she was, dayshift supervisor and the lab had fanned out to encompass nearly the entire building. He was happy, to see it had blossomed and grown out of that tiny broom closet and he was glad, smiling down as he watched her make her way ahead of him, into the glass-walled lab, that she had such a significant hand in it's growth.

He could picture it now, Horatio and Calleigh picking the lab up from it's ruin and getting it on it's feet. He wondered how long they'd faught, just the two of them, to get any sort of decent funding and he respected them immensely, as Calleigh waved her arm out wide to gesture the spanse of the fingerprinting lab.

"This is all for me?" He laughed and Calleigh grinned, rolling her eyes playfully.

"Well, you and three other techs, but yes. It was Eric's little haven."

"May I ask why he left?"

Calleigh smirked, knowing her cheeks reddened just a little. "Me," She smiled shyly. "actually."

Jesse watched how her face changed at the mention of her husband and he smirked. "You weren't married when last we met." He stated and Calleigh met his eyes, grabbing for the end of her scarf again, because it seemed to be her safety blanket.

"No, I wasn't." She smirked and Jesse racked his brain for why the name Delko had sounded so familiar when he'd gotten the paperwork. Then it clicked into place and all the memories of that day twelve years ago, came flooding back with clarity.

"Delko, that was the tow-truck driver on your first case, right?" He questioned, looking completely proud of himself and Calleigh laughed heartily.

"Yeah, he was. But he's a lot more than that now."

"I'm sure, if he's managed to hold on to a woman like you." He commented and Calleigh found herself blushing again.

"I meant that he got his badge, and a great reputation here." She smirked and Jesse grinned.

"Yeah."

* * *

Ryan watched through the glass, as Calleigh led an unfamiliar man through to fingerprinting. She smiled widely and laughed genuinely and he felt like an ass for the way their morning had turned out. Now this new guy was making her day brighter and he couldn't help but feel that he'd broken one of Calleigh's most sacred friendship rules.

He'd questioned her capability and he was suffering for it.

"Wow, he's cute." Ryan flinched at the sound of Natalia's voice over his shoulder and she smirked as she stepped up beside him. "You're jumpy." She commented and Ryan partly growled a response that could barely be considered such. "And grouchy. What's going on?"

He shrugged, watching Calleigh laugh happily at something the guy said. "Nothing."

"You do know I don't believe that right?"

Ryan huffed and looked at her for a moment, before setting his eyes back on the pair through the glass and she narrowed her eyes, trying to work it out. "If this is a crush on Calleigh, thing, I think you're jealous of the wrong guy. If you wanted to be jealous, wouldn't it have been more effective against the guy that married her?"

"I'm not jealous, Natalia."

"Sure looks that way to me." She smirked and Ryan rolled his eyes, turning down the hall but much to his chargrin, she followed him. "Seriously, what's up with you? And who is that guy?" She looked back through the window, facing it now as Ryan stood between her and the view.

"I think he's the new transfer from Los Angeles. And there is nothing up with me."

Natalia frowned, twiddling her fingers. "You're lying again."

"I can't lie about what I don't know, Natalia, I said I 'think' he's from LA but I don't know for sure, I haven't met him." He frowed and she laughed.

"I wasn't talking about him. I'm talking about you, avoiding my question."

"Fine," He hissed, crossing his arms over his chest. "there was a shoot-out this morning. I told Calleigh to stay in the car and she completely ignored me. Then once she shot him, dead, she has the gall to to be pissed off with me?!"

"Wait," Natalia chased after him again, finding it difficult to stay in step with him, but she managed. "you actually _told_ Calleigh to stay in the car?" She laughed and Ryan grumbled, picking up the pace. "Gosh, I'd be pissed at you too. You seriously told her to stay in the car?" She had a look of utter disbelief on her face and Ryan came to a stop and rolled his eyes.

"Yes!" He boomed, drawing attention though he didn't know it. "yes, I know, I was in the wrong but I tried to say I was sorry and she's still pissed!"

"Whoa," Natalia backed up a little. "this is really bothering you, huh?"

Neither Natalia nor Ryan noticed Calleigh and Jesse step out of the lab. Jesse looked down at Calleigh, who stopped in the hall with her arms crossed over her chest, listening intently to Ryan's tirade with narrowed eyes and a frown on her lips.

"Of course it's bothering me. All I did was what Horatio told me to do and she's treating me like a damned leper!"

"Ryan." A stern voice called. He froze, looking over Natalia's shoulder as she slowly turned around and the pair of them set eyes on Calleigh. "Would you follow me, please." She didn't wait for a response, walking down the hall towards her lab, leaving Natalia staring at Jesse and Ryan, slowly taking a breath in before he stepped between Natalia and the new guy, who threw him a sympathetic nod as he followed Calleigh.

"Am I missing something?" Jesse questioned and Natalia waved her hand.

"They'll sort it out. So I'm Natalia Boa Vista." She held her hand out and he took it, shaking it firmly in a way that had her attempting to measure the muscles in his arm with her eyes.

"Jesse Cordoza."

"Well it's lovely to meet you. So you're Eric's replacement?"

"So I hear." He nodded.

"Well you've got some big shoes to fill."

"I suppose it's a help to me that I was wearing them first, right?" He smirked and Natalia grinned.

"You worked here before?"

"Even before Calleigh, as it happens."

"Oh well," Natalia laughed. "you might not want to ride on that. As you can see," Natalia turned, gesturing to Calleigh through the window in the ballistics lab, practically giving Ryan a dressing down for airing her issues with him, in the centre of the lab. Jesse laughed, meeting her eyes as she turned back around and Natalia blushed as he responded.

"Yes, well, I didn't have any intention of that, but the warning is appreciated."

"She's not normally so scary," Natalia chuckled. "she's just got a lot going on right now."

"It wouldn't be the-" He gestured to his own head, implying Calleigh's scarf and Natalia nodded, touching her chin to her chest as she looked left and right.

"Yeah, you know, I really should get back to work."

Jesse nodded, recognising her sudden retreat and accepting her response, because he had asked out of turn. "Sure, I'll see you later?"

"Yeah," She smiled, dipping her head coyly as she turned away. "sure."

* * *

_**I have come to trust no other.  
That you should know my heart, look into it,  
finding there the memory and experience that belong to you, that are you.**_  
~ _Memento_ Mori, Dana Scully

* * *

Calleigh tripped on her own foot as she stepped in the door, tossing her bag to the floor as she made her way inside. She dropped her keys and badge on the side-table and unhooked her gun from her belt, carrying it in her hands down the hall. She sniffed the hall, pressing her hand to her stomach as she kicked off her shoes and headed toward the kitchen. The smell of meat and sauces filled her senses and Calleigh stopped dead in her tracks, closing her eyes tight as Eric stepped into the hall to greet her.

"It's thursday, isn't it?" Calleigh questioned, with her eyes still pressed tightly shut.

"Yeah," Eric smirked, wiping his hands on a dish-towel. "you okay?"

Calleigh released a long, suffering sigh and wandered towards him, tucking her head under his chin as she hugged him. And she smiled, as he kissed the top of her head. "I've just had a really, long, day. And I'd prefer if it were friday."

"Wanna talk about it before your Mom gets here?" He questioned, walking her backwards into the kitchen and pressing her up against the counter. He pressed a kiss to her lips before he stepped away and Calleigh pulled herself up to sit on the bench, resting her holstered gun beside the phone, stealing a snowpea and popping it in her mouth.

"Oh, it's just Ryan being protective to a ridiculous point," She rolled her eyes and Eric chuckled, knowing that she'd have been exaggerating to a certain degree. "Oh, and did you know, your replacement started today."

"Really? Nice guy?" He took a sip from the beer rested beside him and Calleigh nodded slowly.

"Yet, it was weird though," She smiled tiredly. "turns out I know him."

"Really?"

"Yeah, the day I started at the lab, he was leaving."

"Oh," Eric smirked. "so you don't know him that well?"

"I know his name," She smiled sweetly and Eric laughed, setting his stirring spoon aside to rest his hands on her knees and stand with his hips against the counter, between her legs. "and Natalia seems to think she can read his whole life story in his eyes." She laughed, but Eric tilted his head back with a frown.

"So he's good looking?"

Calleigh stared at him. "Don't even start the jealousy thing, Eric, I'm not in the mood."

"Okay, okay," He threw his hands up in surrender, offering Calleigh his beer to take a sip as she smiled. "it's just weird not being there now, unable to scare off potential competition."

Calleigh giggled, pressing her face in between his shoulder blades as she dropped a kiss to his back. "Aw, you actually think there's competition, that's cute."

Eric grinned, looking down into the pot he was stirring as Calleigh continued to hug his back. Sometimes he complained about the size of their kitchen, whinging that it was too narrow and things were too small. But then moments like this, he felt that the kitchen was just the right size because even Calleigh, as small as she was, could reach across and wrap her arms and legs around him. "You know, there's no competition for you." He whispered and Calleigh kissed him just behind the ear.

"I know. And hey, maybe we can have a barbeque or something and you can meet the new guy, so you'll feel less out of the loop."

Eric laughed, squeezing her hand and kissing the back of her fingers as they heard the doorbell ring. Calleigh grumbled, hopping down from the counter and kissing his lips quickly before heading off down the hall. "I still wish it were Friday," She muttered and smirked when she heard Eric bark a laugh from the kitchen.

"Hi, Momma." Calleigh smiled, opening the door and welcoming her in.

"Hi." Charlotte looked around as soon as she side-stepped Calleigh, pressing a kiss to her cheek as though she felt it were necessary, even though it wasn't something they regularly did. Entirely too formal, Calleigh inwardly cringed, but she said nothing. "Um, Eric's in here." Gesturing down the hall, Calleigh led the way, offering her mother a seat on one of the stools at the counter.

"Hi," Eric grinned, that friendly welcoming smile that he seemed able to give just anyone who crossed his path. And with a longing sigh, Calleigh felt blessed to have him in moments like this.

* * *

_**Grew up in a small town, And when the rain would fall down,  
I'd just stare out my window. Dreaming of what could be,  
And if I'd end up happy. I would pray.**_  
~ _Breakaway_, Kelly Clarkson

* * *

Charlotte watched from her place at the kitchen counter. Calleigh handed her a glass of wine with a strained smile and she took it, gratefully, watching her daughter as she effortlessly manouvered around the small kitchen, pressing her palm to her husband's back each time she passed. She smiled to herself, studying them and loving the look in Eric's eyes, each and every time he looked to Calleigh thinking that neither woman had seen him do it. She hadn't spent long enough in the same room with any man her daughter had ever considered for the role Eric seemed to fit so perfectly. Any young man she'd brought home had been met with silence or blatant disapproval. Or she'd find some inconsiderate way to embarress her daughter beyond forgiveness. And yet, Calleigh had continued to try and sometimes Charlotte wondered why she'd bothered. But looking at them now, seeing the love that passed between them in the way they moved or spoke to each other, the way Calleigh tossed a herb into the pot of homemade sauce without even consulting Eric, the way he lifted the spoon and tasted it then smiled, she knew why Calleigh had persisted.

She'd wanted all along, to share her life with her mother. She'd wanted to feel loved and she wanted her to be proud and Charlotte had been far to self-absorbed to see it. Eric winked at her, as he carried the rest of the food to the dining table, laying it all out beautifully with folded napkins and a centerpeice of roses. They'd really made the effort and Charlotte made a mental note, not to screw it up.

"So, Eric," Charlotte cleared her throat, fiddling with her fork as Calleigh dished up dinner. "you; you're a diver?"

"Yeah," He grinned. "just started up a touring business, actually, because when Calleigh and I got married we decided that it'd be best if we didn't work together in the lab anymore and neither of us really wanted to work the nightshift."

"And how is that going?"

"It's great," He shrugged. "I mean, I haven't had any tours yet but I'm hoping to get some flyers out in the next few weeks. I've been spending most of my time doing up the boat and getting everything ready."

"It sounds wonderful," She smiled, looking across the table to Calleigh who glanced down at the table-top, avoiding her eyes. Charlotte took a sip of her wine, then looked at her glass before setting it aside. "So, you're going to try for a baby? That's exciting."

Eric's face immediately lit up and whilst it took Calleigh a little longer to brighten, she did and when she smiled she smiled widely at Eric, letting him take her hand into his on the table top.

"I was wondering," Charlotte set her fork down, pressing her palms to her lap as she looked up at the both of them. "I mean, I know that you have your parents here, Eric," He inclined his head. "and I know that Calleigh's father has been doing his very best to spend as much time with her as possible, but I was wondering if the pair of you wouldn't mind if I moved closer?"

Calleigh's eyes widened and when her head shot up, Charlotte's attention was completely on her. "It's just that, I feel that I've got a lot to make up for and I really want to try, Calleigh. I really want to be here for you."

Calleigh bit her lip, glancing at Eric who smiled hopefully, holding onto her hand to ground her as she thought it over. She wasn't one to deny anyone the right to their own choices, but her mother was giving her the choice here. And with a remarkable clarity, she realised that she really did want to make it work. She wanted to be able to talk to her again, she wanted to be able to share the small things even if, at times, they were unable to talk about the bigger things. She knew in her heart, that her mother was trying because she'd never taken such drastic steps before. She'd never extended herself so far and Calleigh was hopeful, that her marriage to Eric had sparked a line of new beginnings that could set to rights, the shadows of her past.

She knew none of it could be erased. But maybe, just maybe, he was the lucky charm that could help her set it to rest.

"I think," Calleigh breathed, looking into Eric's eyes before she turned back to Charlotte. "I think that's a good idea."

"Really?" Charlotte's eyes widened.

"Yeah, Momma," Calleigh smiled, feeling a small weight rise up off her shoulders. "it's worth a try, right?"

Eric tugged on her hand, kissing the back of her fingers as he smiled down at her. And Calleigh grinned, meeting his eyes again and silently thanking him, for giving her the strength to let her mother back in and the comfort to feel safe, if it all fell apart.

TBC.


	19. Chapter 19

_**I should be crying, but I just can't let it show.  
I should be hoping, but I can't stop thinking.  
~ **This Woman's Work, _Maxwell

**_

* * *

_**

Eric sat with his elbows on his knees, resting his chin on his knuckles as he sat at the foot of her bed and watched her sleep. Her face seemed peaceful but with each breath in and out, her eyebrows knitted together just slightly enough for him to notice. She was dreaming, he thought, hoping that it wasn't that she was feeling any pain as she slept. The surgery had taken longer than he'd thought; Doctor Barlow had said it could take anywhere from three to five hours, with the reconstruction and he'd twitched and twiddled his thumbs the entire time. Wyatt had called his cell-phone near to twelve times, asking how she was and all Eric could really say was that as far as he knew, she was doing fine. They hadn't come out to speak to him at all and he'd spent three hours watching Family Guy re-runs on the silent television mounted on the waiting room wall, going slowly mad.

He wondered if the first few months of all marriages were this stressful. They'd been through so much already and they'd only been married a little over a month. Calleigh was far more non-challant about the whole thing, telling him everything would be fine with the surgery, even though he knew each time she moved to reassure him, her voice was a little more unsteady. The closer the date seemed to get, the quieter she had become and as she'd whispered she loved him, smiling up at him as he pressed a kiss to her forehead, he knew that she was terrified going into that operating room without him. Many times in the waiting room, he'd wanted to punch the wall in frustration, but that'd only get him evicted from the hospital with a hefty bill for damages and four hours wasted with no chance of his face being the first Calleigh saw when she woke up.

He wanted to cry or scream or throw something against the wall, but he knew none of those choices would help ease his worry and he just couldn't stop the worst case scenarios floating in and out of his mind the longer he waited.

When the nurse had appeared to tell him they were moving her to a room, he thought that he'd blacked out for a moment, because within an instant her hand was at his elbow and she was calling his name as if he'd drifted off into fairy-land. If he was honest with himself, he probably had, because the idea that the surgery was a success and she was being moved to a private room, made his heart leap into his throat. He'd nodded dumbly, following slowly behind her as he sent Wyatt a text, letting him know that she was out and he'd see her soon.

Now, sitting there watching her, Eric smiled slowly. She looked gorgeous as she slept. She wasn't allowed to wear her scarves in the operating room and even though that made her self-concious, he smiled at the small amount of golden peach-fuzz on the top of her head that had only started to grow back in the last couple of weeks. She barely ever let him look at it whilst she was awake, so he savoured the moment while she was still under aenesthetic.

"_Hola, mijo._" A hushed voice from the door surprised him and Eric smiled, as he turned and noticed his mother quietly making her way into the room. She smiled sweetly, craning her neck to kiss his cheek as she rounded the bed to place a large vase of yellow tulips on the small table at Calleigh's bedside. "you said that yellow was her favourite, _si_?"

"_Si, mami_," He grinned. "she'll love them."

"She's not awake yet?" Pavel whispered, patting Eric's shoulder as he joined his wife on the other side of the bed. Eric shook his head, occupying his hands by running his fingers along the arch of Calleigh's small foot, through the knitted hospital blanket.

"They just brought her up here about twenty minutes ago. They said she might take a little while and she might be a bit groggy, but she should wake up soon."

"And how did the surgery go?" Carmen questioned, dragging a chair carefully up to Calleigh's right side, hooking her handbag over the end of the bed and resting her hands just beside Calleigh's on the blanket.

"Good," Eric scrubbed his hand over his face, yawning. "the Doctor said that everything's gone well. Which is a relief."

"It sure is." Pavel smiled and Eric inclined his head, sitting back down with his hands still on Calleigh's foot.

The room stayed silent as the three of them sat there, watching her sleep or watching the time tick over on the clock. Eric didn't speak, because he didn't want to wake her before she was ready and Carmen held her hand, gently caressing her knuckles and raising herself to the edge of her seat every time she made the faintest sound. It made Eric laugh silently, the way his mother patiently waited on her to wake and it made him proud that his family could love her almost as much as he loved her, himself.

* * *

_Calleigh giggled as she followed the little girl out into the morning. She twirled around, showing Calleigh how her little pink dress spun and sparkled in the sunlight and Calleigh grinned, following in her footsteps down the deserted Miami street. Normally, it would have frightened her to see the city so silent. There wasn't a car or a street vendor in sight. All the shop-fronts were decorated with the brightest spring displays she'd ever seen, mimicking those of the high-end stores all around the world but there was no one inside and as the little girl with long blond curls danced ahead of her, Calleigh couldn't stop her feet from chasing after her._

_The girl stopped, standing in the center of the road and Calleigh stopped with her, watching her drop to her knees and look down. With curious eyes, Calleigh looked around her, listening to the sound of birds in the trees as the little girl waved her over. And Calleigh smiled, dropping down to her knees beside her. The girl pointed, grinning a broad white smile that she knew she should recognise. She hesitated, tucking her long, straight hair behind her ear as she turned to study what the girl was looking at. And there, in the center of the road, was a painting of her._

_She was confused and as she sat back on her feet, she looked from the little girl to the painting, trying to deduce it's meaning. In the painting she was thinner and her eyes looked tired, she had a pink scarf wrapped around her head. Her lips were smiling but there was something missing from her expression that scared Calleigh just a little. Her hand came up to touch the ends of her long hair and glancing at the little girl out of the corner of her eye, Calleigh furrowed her brow. But all the little girl did was smile and hold her hand out to her, palm up._

_"Who are you?" Calleigh rasped, not having moved her hand._

_"Who do you want me to be?" The girl answered, with humor dancing in her dark brown eyes. Calleigh studied her features. She had long curled hair that was blond, but there was a hint of a darker shade at the roots and in her eyes, though they were brown, a fleck of gold made them sparkle when she smiled. Her nose was somewhat large, for a little girl, but not unattractively so and with a smirk, Calleigh noted her thick, naturally red lips. There was so much about the little girl that was familiar and yet so much that was so foreign. She was like her and she was like Eric and yet, she was like no one she'd ever seen before and it baffled her._

_The sound of a bus screeched behind her and Calleigh startled, spinning around. But when she looked across the street, there was nothing there. She jumped up, looking left and right as her hair slapped her in the face, but there was no one to be seen. There were no turns in the road and no chance that a bus could possibly disappear so fast. Turning back down to the little girl, Calleigh gasped as she saw Eric there, kneeling down where the little girl had been, looking down at the ground with a smile on his face. _

_She couldn't remember a time in her life when she'd been more confused. Reaching out, she rested her hand upon his shoulder, gasping when she felt the movement of his muscles beneath her fingertips. He looked up at her then, his eyes shining with brown and gold and a longing that had her dropping back to her knees, throwing herself into his arms. Eric hugged her back, but he said nothing yet and Calleigh was content to just sit there in his arms, forever. It didn't matter to her that the world had stopped around them because most of the time, with him, she felt as though that was happening anyway. She was just so happy that he was there, to hold her and to press kisses to her hair._

_"You've got to get moving now, Cal." He whispered and she sighed, snuggling closer and refusing to let go._

_"I don't want to." She muttered, shuffling closer to him and ignoring how the gun at her hip restricted her movement just the slightest bit. She hadn't even questioned, why in this strange dream-like world, she was dressed from head to toe in black with her registered side-arm on her hip and her badge strapped securely to her belt. It hadn't even phased her, but as Eric gently eased her back, she realised how strange it really was._

_"You really have to go, Calleigh."_

_"But I don't want to leave you," She whimpered, feeling so uncharacteristically vulnerable the further he pushed her away. She rationalised that she only, really, showed her fears to him and even then, they were organised and controlled, doled out in small incriments so as not to appear that she'd ever, truely, broken down. But what she realised, in this place, was that since arriving, the ability to control her emotions was as elusive as the ability to control her feet. "and I don't want to leave her." Calleigh shuddered, seeing the little girl standing just behind Eric with her tiny hand rested on his shoulder. Calleigh noticed a small birthmark that looked like a butterfly, on the inside of her wrist and she studied it, not noticing the tears that had edged at the corner of her eye. _

_Because she felt uncontrollably drawn to the little girl._

_"You're not," Eric smiled, brushing her tears away with his finger as he held her face in his hands. And though Calleigh's eyes didn't leave the smiling face of the little girl, who seemed to get younger the longer she watched her, she could feel the warmth of Eric's eyes on her, drawing her back. "you're coming back to us."_

_"I don't understand." She whispered, gripping his hand against her face and willing her body to stay where it was. But the harder she faught, the faster they faded until she couldn't feel the warmth of his fingers in her hand anymore._

_"It's alright," Eric's voice whispered, though it seemed hollow and further away. "you're going to wake up soon, Cal." She felt a warmth against the side of her face and with Eric's eyes gone from her sight, she sought out the source of the warmth, feeling it burn against her skin until a bright light began to blind her._

* * *

_**I lived like a wild and lonely soul,  
Lost in a dream beyond control.  
You are the one that brought me home,  
Down to earth.  
~** Tiger in the Night, _Katie Melua

* * *

"Hey," Eric whispered, greeting her with a smile and brushing his fingers gently along her brow as her eyes fluttered open slowly, blinking against the harsh light. "Dad." He looked up behind him and Calleigh smiled as the lights dimmed just a little.

"Your parents are here?" She questioned, hearing how scratchy her own voice was as she looked into his eyes.

"_Si, mija,_" Carmen rested her hand on Calleigh's shoulder and she grinned, turning her head to look up at her. "how do you feel?"

"A little strange, but I think I'm still numb."

"You're on a lot of pain killers," Eric nodded to the drip in her hand and Calleigh sighed, squeezing his fingers. "we missed you." He whispered, pressing the back of her hand to his cheek and Calleigh closed her eyes again, sleepily loving the feel of his touch and recognising that it was him, that had dragged her out of that very strange dream. She couldn't quite work out where she'd been, but as she opened her eyes again, seeing him sitting there, she somehow felt that it didn't matter. She could see the small girl's eyes still, if she closed her eyes tight enough, but with each look into Eric's they were slowly fading away.

"I missed you too." She blinked groggily, keeping her eyes focused on Eric's face as best she could. "So, how did I go?"

"The Doctor said you're doing fine. The surgery went well."

She sighed. "That sounds good."

"You're sleepy." Eric chuckled and Calleigh opened her eyes back up as wide as she could, playing strong.

"No I'm not."

"Cal," He furrowed his brow, with a smile on his lips. "rest. I'll be here when you wake up."

Carmen watched them whisper to each other, and she smiled at Pavel on the opposite side of the room where he stood with his hand in his pockets and his back against the wall. They were completely engrossed in each other and while normally Calleigh would have been far more hospitable, Carmen much preferred this. To see Calleigh smiling, however tiredly, brought a flutter to her heart as she made her way around the bed and rested her hand on Eric's shoulder. "We're going to go." She whispered and gently touched Calleigh's cheek before she could protest. "We will come and see you again once Eric gets you home, you rest," She instructed. "you need your rest."

"Thank you, Carmen. Thank you, Pavel." Carmen pressed a kiss to her cheek and Pavel reached over to squeeze her hand before the pair of them disappeared through the door, with Pavel pulling it closed behind them.

"Your brother called several dozen times while you were in there." Eric smirked and Calleigh tried her best not to laugh, feeling a pressure on her chest that made it a little difficult for her to breathe. She felt numb and a little sore along her sides but the pain she knew she would have felt if it weren't for the painkillers, manifested itself in a weight pressing down on her body. It was uncomfortable, but not unbearably so.

"Figures," She grinned and Eric chuckled.

"You're tired." He stated and Calleigh let her eyes drift closed again, just for a moment.

"Yeah."

"Go back to sleep."

"Okay," She let her eyes close and this time, as Eric smiled, they didn't open again. Her breathing started to slowly even out and he kissed the back of her hand. "will you stay with me?" She whispered, keeping her eyes closed tight as she hugged his hand close to her face. Eric edged his chair closer, folding his other arm into her side and brushing the tips of his fingers against her elbow with a smile.

"Forever." He grinned wider as Calleigh smiled in her sleep, muttering something about him being sappy before completely drifting off.

* * *

Jesse sat, blinking at the computer screen. Up at nearly four in the morning, because he couldn't sleep, he'd arrived at the lab with bags under his eyes, a large cup of coffee and many strange looks from the nightshift staff that had never before met him. He'd been there nearly a week, getting his feet wet and still, there were so many faces that after twelve years, he couldn't possibly remember and even those that hadn't even qualified from the academy at the time. He rubbed his eyes, watching the prints running through AFIS as he yawned and reached over for a new pair of latex gloves, preparing to check the long, dusty, painters tarp for prints that were likely to be in the very last place he looked, per his good fortune.

"Hey, you're in early." He looked up, smiling as Natalia stepped into the lab.

"Hey," He greeted, dipping his head and taking any excuse to avoid putting the gloves on just yet.

"It's perfect though, because you can be first to sign the card." She waved it in front of him, also carrying with it a small beaker, that had in it, a twenty dollar bill and a sticker on the front that said 'Flower fund.'

"What card?" He frowned, pressing his palms to the counter as she set the 'Get Well Soon' card down in front of him.

"You don't know?" She blinked. "It's for Calleigh, her surgery was yesterday, she's off for the next month." He was staring at her blankly and Natalia chuckled. "You really didn't know?"

He shook his head and she shrugged.

"It's alright, she's a really private person so..." She trailed off and Jesse grinned, slipping the card towards him and opening it up. Inside it was a picture of a cartoon penguin and a cute little 'get well' poem that made him chuckle and he found himself actually wondering if Calleigh would laugh too. "a few of us are going to the hospital this afternoon, to visit her, you're welcome to come if you like." She smiled and Jesse looked up.

He considered it, for a moment but then apologetically shook his head. "No, I think it'd be best if it's just you guys. I don't know Calleigh all that well and I don't want to impose."

"Oh, that'd be fine," Natalia laughed. "Calleigh's lovely, as you know, and Eric is great. I'm sure you'd be welcome."

Still, he shook his head. "Give her my best, will you?"

Natalia nodded reluctantly, smiling her thanks as he pulled a ten from his pocket and shoved it into the beaker with a grin. They both jumped, as he doors to the lab swung open and Ryan suddenly appeared. He had his mouth open as though he was about to say something to Jesse, when his eyes fell on the beaker. "That for Calleigh?" He questioned and Natalia nodded, holding the beaker up and waggling it in front of his face. He shoved a bill into it, smirking as she held up the card.

"You have to sign this too."

"Can't you sign it for me?" He whined and Natalia rolled her eyes.

"No, Calleigh will know if you didn't sign it, Ryan."

"Fine," He slipped it over in front of himself, signing it quickly with a joke that made him laugh, but likely wouldn't get a peep out of anyone else, before dropping it back in Natalia's hand and looking back up at Jesse. "a guy shot out the tires of an Audi on the causeway, at least that's what the passenger said. Driver was killed on impact, Horatio wants you and me out there, asap." He pointed his thumb over his shoulder, turning on his heel and disappearing again as swiftly as he'd come.

"I guess that's my cue." Jesse threw Natalia a glistening white smile and she had to press her palm to the counter to stop her knees from buckling as she watched him disappear out of the lab, studying the ripple of his shirt against his back as he left.

* * *

_"Hola," The little girl with blond hair and brown eyes, grinned as she stood before her looking down at Calleigh sitting on the edge of a poppy field. She was dressed in a long, flowing sundress that touched her toes and at her feet, was a long white beach of the most pristine sand. The girl before her had on a bright yellow hat and with a grin, she turned on her heel and dashed towards the water._

_"Wait!" Calleigh screamed, clambering to her feet and trying to chase her. She staggered down the beach, glancing back at the poppy field in the distance as it disappeared whilst she continued to run after the little girl. "Stop!" She called again and the little girl stopped still, turning slowly to meet her eyes. "Who are you?"_

_The girl shrugged, tugging on her little dress as she looked up at Calleigh. "You know who I am."_

_"No," Calleigh laughed sardonically. "I don't."_

_"Sure you do." She answered happily, turning again and skipping away. Calleigh stared at her, not quite sure what all of this meant. The little girl dropped to her knees a little further down the beach, patting the bottom of a bucket to form a sand-castle turret as she hummed along to an unknown tune and Calleigh surveyed the area around her. The poppy field was gone, replaced with the skyline and storefronts that lined Miami beach and as she listened to the little girl's angelic voice humming along, she noticed an SUV parked just a little further down. There was a silhouette of a man standing in front of it, but she couldn't make out his face because of the setting sun. He waved and hesitantly, Calleigh waved back, looking up at her own hand because she wasn't quite sure what had possessed her to do it._

_"Why am I here?" She asked the empty space around her and to her surprise, there was a small tug on her dress. Calleigh looked down, meeting those eyes that were slowly becoming as important to her memory as Eric's._

_"Momma," She tugged her dress again and Calleigh's eyes widened._

She woke with a start, blinking rapidly and breathing heavily, finding it hard to get air into her lungs. "Shh," Eric soothed, standing up beside her and resting his hands on her shoulders. "you're alright, I'm right here." He whispered and she looked up at him, staring into his eyes, almost completely disorientated. "You okay?" He questioned, as she studied the room around her, slowly realising where she was.

"Yeah," She released a long breath. "yeah, I'm alright. Just a strange dream." Calleigh waited for her heart to calm down, watching Eric playing with a pull in her blanket. Glancing out the window, she could see the first signs of the sun coming up and she turned to him, with a conspiratorial smirk. "You hid in here all night?"

Eric blushed, leaning in close with a grin. "It's our secret, alright?" She nodded, licking her lips as he stood and pressed a kiss to her nose. "So, do you want to tell me about the dream?" Calleigh studied his eyes, looking into them as deeply as she could for as long as she could, trying to see in them what she'd seen in the dream. But he looked different in real life. The dream was vivid and at the time it seemed clear, but the further away from it she drifted, the more beautiful Eric really looked and the less detail about the dream, she could remember. In her mind, she could see a beach and a sandcastle, but the people and the sounds had left her. She knew that the wind had been gently blowing, but the feel of it against her face, hadn't been there at all.

"It was just a dream," She swallowed, reaching for his hand. "I barely remember any of it now."

"Wasn't giant killer ants, was it?" He smirked and Calleigh tried desperately not to laugh, wincing when she arched her back to make it easier to breathe. "Sorry," He muttered and she glared up at him, still smiling even through the discomfort.

"No," She spoke through her teeth. "no ants."

And he just chuckled.

TBC.


	20. Chapter 20

I feel much better today and even though I haven't heard back from the job yet, they did say that they'd call either today, tomorrow or wednesday so I'm still hopefull. And I'm happy to give you the next installment. I hope you enjoy it. Lots of Alexx in this one.

* * *

With the wind gusting around Bal Harbour, Alexx had to hold her jacket closed as she made her way up the front path to the door. Thankfully, their front door sat in an alcove and the wait for Eric to greet her, didn't come with it's own personal hurricane before she jumped past him, into the house. Eric laughed, upon seeing her so tousled and with a playful glare, she straightened her hair.

"A bit windy, Alexx?" He questioned, knowing her answer fairly well as he chuckled and headed back to the livingroom.

"Yes, well," She frowned, finding a stray leaf in her hair and detouring into the kitchen to toss it in the garbage. "just keep laughing, baby." She rolled her eyes when she could hear him laughing still, from where he was in the livingroom. "Did you want me to make some coffee whilst I'm in here?" She called out, smiling as she reached for three red mugs in the cabinet overhead.

"That would be lovely, Alexx." Calleigh's voice answered and Alexx grinned, as she checked the water level in the kettle and switched it on.

With three steaming mugs, Alexx wandered into the livingroom and smiled widely when she saw Eric with his hands in Calleigh's, gently helping her raise her arms up and rolling her shoulders. "What's this?" She smirked, setting the mugs down on the coffee table.

"Shoulder exercises," Calleigh frowned. "I have to do them at least twice a day. It was alright for the first week or so," She shrugged her head. "because everything was numb. But now everything tingles and itches and it just feels weird." She laughed, earning a chuckle from Eric as he raised her arms again.

"Oh well, honey," Alexx sipped her coffee carefully. "it's to stop your muscles stiffening up. It's a good thing. And a blessing you've got Eric here to help you."

"See, I'm a blessing." Eric smirked and Calleigh rolled her eyes.

"My goodness, Alexx, don't give him any ideas." The women laughed and Eric frowned playfully.

"Alright then, I'll take that as my cue to leave," Eric stood to his feet, taking his mug of coffee with him as he leant down to press a kiss to Calleigh's lips. "love you." He whispered, just in front of her face and even though they knew Alexx was there and could hear them, the moment was completely their own. She grinned, knowing she was blushing just a little as she kissed him again quickly, watching him wander out into the backyard.

He had plans to rid the garden of weeds that day and Calleigh had plans to watch from her chaise lounge inside the back door, as he did it. Then Alexx had called and while she was slightly disappointed that her day of relaxing and enjoying the view of her husband hard at work was going to be interrupted, she was excited to see her friend. They hadn't recieved many guests since she arrived home from the hospital. Everyone had either been too busy with work or Calleigh had been too tired, the good moments never having been able to coincide, so apart from Eric's parents, her father and a very hesitant visit from her mother, Calleigh could be considered to have been, anti-social for the three weeks she'd already spent recovering.

Alexx liked to see them like this, so quiet and happy. She didn't mind in the slightest, when they'd retreat into a place where it was just the two of them and they would speak to each other in a way that they'd never speak to each other in public. It made her happy, because they were sharing something so very intimate with her and she was proud, that they considered her a close enough friend - family - to let her see it, considering they were both such private people.

"How have you been feeling, honey?" Alexx questioned, taking another sip of her coffee and noticing how Calleigh looked down at her's, but didn't touch it.

"Alright," Calleigh twitched, scrunching her nose just slightly when she pulled in the wrong direction. "it's a little uncomfortable at times, but I'm coping." She swallowed, scratching her temple and smiling to herself when her fingers brushed the short, soft hairs just over the top of her ear. "I didn't feel so well this morning, but I think it's just the painkillers making me a little woozy."

Alexx frowned, considering the painkillers that Calleigh would be on for her surgery and wondering, if they should cause her to feel that way. She couldn't quite work it out off the top of her head, but she had a sneaking suspicion that she wasn't supposed to feel ill at all. It just didn't feel right. "And when do you think we're going to see your pretty face, back at the lab?" She grinned, loving the way Calleigh always seemed to dip her head so humbly when given any form of compliment.

"Well, I'm set to be back next week," She grinned. "and I have to say, I'm looking forward to it. I mean, Horatio has completely restricted my activity, but I can work and that's exciting."

"You're getting tired of Eric already?" Alexx laughed and Calleigh giggled.

"Oh, god no." She smirked. "I just miss the lab and I want Eric to be able to get back out there on the water. He's had calls all week for tours and he's been blowing them off for me. I don't want him to lose customers. Especially when I can take care of myself."

Alexx reached over and took Calleigh's hand, squeezing it just a little. "He wouldn't do it if he didn't want to, honey."

"I know," Calleigh sighed, smiling gently. "I just wish this could come a little easier for us, for a change. I wish we didn't have to fight like this and lose so much, just to break even."

"You haven't lost each other," Alexx moved to sit beside her on the lounge. "after eight years of knowing each other, and being together through all of this, you've still got each other, baby, isn't that the most important thing?"

Calleigh's smile broadened. "Yeah, you're right." Calleigh patted the top of her hand, grateful that Alexx could still show her the silver lining on any situation. She and Eric had been together for almost two years now, and married for a couple of months, but up until that very moment, their lives had been wrought with issue after issue because Calleigh's cancer just couldn't seem to leave her alone and Eric refused to let her deal with it on her own. She was immensely grateful, for his back-up and support and love. But what she wanted above anything else, was the chance for something to come easily for them. They'd danced around each other for years and even after realising how they felt, things had been rocky on the road to trusting each other outside of work. While her cancer wasn't considered to be the worst it could have been, especially because it hadn't spread to other organs in her body, everything that could have gone wrong, seemed to have touched her in some way. And then the surgery and Calleigh felt like somewhere, there was a little devil with red-tipped wings laughing at them.

Of course, thoughts like that made her want to slap herself, because demons and devils were Eric's area of paranoia. But she still thought that just one thing going right for them, straight off the starting block, would make the future just a little brighter.

"How is the baby thing, coming along?"

Calleigh froze when Alexx spoke, clenching her fingers tightly around her friend's as she looked down at the floor. She hesitated, taking a deep breath and licking her lips as she looked up into Alexx' eyes. "We've, ah," She glanced out the window at Eric as he yanked the filter out of the pool. "we've had a few tests done, before the surgery they said that everything was working fine, even after the chemo, it's just going to be a little harder." She scratched along her cuticule, looking down at her toes. "I haven't been tested in about a month because it's been three weeks since the surgery and I'm just..."

Alexx nodded her head slowly, reaching up to run her hand over Calleigh's shoulder soothingly.

"I just don't know if I'm ready for him to-" Calleigh stopped herself, unsure of how to word it. But she was grateful, when Alexx' eyes told her that she knew what she meant.

"It's alright, honey, I'm sure he understands."

"I know," Calleigh sighed. "I know that, I just can't bring myself to-" Letting a tear fall from her eye, Calleigh leant into Alexx' outstretched arms, letting her hold her as she hugged her, doing her best to soothe her. "I just feel so different."

"It's just going to take time, baby."

"But we don't have much of that left. And I just know something's going to go wrong."

"Hey," Alexx held her face in her hands, running the pads of her thumbs over her cheeks. "don't think like that, honey, you've had some bad luck but you always make it through. You both do."

Calleigh half shook her head, not sure whether she had the energy to disagree. They had a track-record, that was for sure and they did have an uncanny ability to stumble through hardships and make it out alright. But Calleigh didn't want the future of their family to rest on whether or not their luck was finally going to run out.

* * *

_**You calm the storms, and You give me rest  
You hold me in Your hands, You won't let me fall  
You steal my heart, and You take my breath away  
Would You take me in, take me deeper now.  
**_~ _Everything_, Lifehouse

* * *

Calleigh sat in the middle of the bed with her legs crossed under her. Wearing one of Eric's large t-shirts, she felt safer in herself, hugging it against her like a warm, comfortable blanket. It smelt like him and it was worn and a little tattered at the edges. It made her smile as she watched him wandering around their bedroom. He was folding away clean clothes and picking his socks up off the floor. He had his boxers on, ready for bed and as she noticed the muscles on his back ripple with each turn, she licked her lips and twisted her fingers in the fabric of the shirt.

"So what did you and Alexx talk about?" He questioned, pulling the blankets back on his side before making his way into the bathroom. She could hear him turn on the tap and she could hear the sound of him brushing his teeth as she looked down at her fingers.

"Different things," She breathed. "mostly you and me, those dreams I've been having."

Eric stuck his head out of the door. "Still having those?"

She sighed. "Not so much now, just every now and then I'll get a glimpse of the little girl or I find myself walking down that deserted street. It's so strange but whenever it happens it feels so very real."

"I now what you mean," She heard him shuffle a few things around in the bathroom before the light flicked off and he was walking towards the bed. "when I was in the coma," He noticed Calleigh shudder and he reached for her, taking her hand as he sat down on the bed. He knew that she still felt guilt over that and he knew, if he'd have been her, he wasn't sure if he'd have recovered from it. "when I was in the coma, Calleigh, I kept seeing you. Sometimes you'd smile and hold your hand out to me, sometimes you'd be too far away for me to reach and sometimes you'd be running so fast in the opposite direction that I couldn't catch you. But it was always you," He breathed through a smile. "I worked out later that it meant you'd always be in my life. I worked out that I _was_ going to live, and that even if you were with me or so far away I could barely see you, you'd be there. And I felt safe."

"Eric," Calleigh choked, but he climbed up onto his knees in front of her, pressing his palms to her cheeks.

"I'm just saying, Cal," He kissed her forehead. "that maybe it's not the dream itself. Maybe it's trying to tell you something?"

"Like what?" She studied his eyes and Eric sat back on the bed, mirroring her position with his hands on her thighs, running his thumbs in small circles whilst she held her small fingers over his.

"Well," He thought. "what do you feel, when you see the little girl?"

Calleigh shrugged. "When it's in the dream, I feel warm, safe."

"And when you're not in the dream? What about when you just think about her?"

Calleigh bit down on her lip. "I get chills and I feel like the world is spinning. Sometimes it feels like I'm going to be sick."

Eric looked thoughtful for a moment, trying to work out what it could all mean and as his expression changed, as his brow furrowed and his eyes darted from side to side, she smirked and squeezed his hands against her thighs. "You have no idea what it means, do you?" She giggled and Eric looked up at her with wide eyes.

Then he laughed. "No, I don't. But it's not my dream, it's meant for you to figure out. I just wish I could help you." He smiled, running his fingers further down her thigh until the tips were playing at the edge of her panties. Calleigh shuddered, reaching for his hand quickly and stilling his movements.

"Eric," She closed her eyes tightly and gasped, shivering when he flattened his hand across her thigh.

"I'm not going to hurt you, Cal." He whispered.

"I know," She nodded, slowly opening her eyes as he lent towards her. "I'm just scared."

"The tough as nails, _Calleigh Duquesne_, is scared of little ole' me?" He smirked and Calleigh sucked in a breath, still holding onto the hand she could feel edging it's way around her leg until his fingertips dipped under the hem of her panties and his palm was rested against her hip.

"No, Eric, _Calleigh Delko_, is scared that you're not going to like what you see." She met his eyes then. Bright, red-rimmed green eyes looked fearfully into the clarity of caring brown and his heart broke just a little bit more. He'd never seen her so afraid before. Since the surgery, while she'd allowed him to help her with her exercises, she didn't change in front of him anymore and sometimes, he'd seen her emerge from their bedroom with tears in her eyes, only to learn that the task had proven harder than she thought. Though she never asked for his help. Even when she had been diagnosed with this cancer, her world had shattered and everything had darkened, but she'd allowed him in. She'd allowed him to help her through it and she'd allowed him to see her most painful, ugly personal scars. Now she had real ones, that he knew could never be as ugly as she described and he wasn't even allowed to comfort her or tell her that she was beautiful, because from it only came tears and silence.

"Calleigh," He started, but she dipped her head, cutting him off.

"I don't know if I'm ready, Eric." She whispered, hugging her arms into her body as she shied away from him.

"Hey," He reached up with both hands, gripping her shoulders and kissing her nose. "you have nothing to be afraid of, Calleigh." He whispered back and she shook her head but he gently shook her, forcing her to look up at him. "I promise you, Calleigh," He kissed her again, this time with strength he wanted to give to her, pressed into her reddened lips. "there is nothing about you or your body, that I don't or couldn't love."

"But Eric," She wept. "I'm scarred. I'm," She gestured to her chest. "they're not like they were before."

"And you think that matters to me?" He asked her incredulously. "Calleigh, you're gorgeous. Do you hear me? You are _gorgeous. _I could ask any guy at the lab, hell, ask any woman at the lab and they'll tell you that you're stuning. And you're not just beautiful," He chuckled. "you're smart and you're funny and you could shoot a button of a guy's shirt from six hundred yards away." Calleigh scoffed and Eric smiled, thankful he'd gotten a reaction out of her that wasn't discomfort or fear. "And more than that, you're kind and you love me, of all people. So you've got scars, Cal, we all do and so what if yours are on the outside. It doesn't make you any less beautiful to me. I just don't want you to be afraid to show me."

Slipping back into the pillows, until her back was rested against them and Eric was looking at her from across the bed, Calleigh's breathing deepened and her eyes set on him had filled with tears. She was still afraid, and more afraid than she ever thought she could have been, about him seeing her naked. But with what he'd said and how she knew he felt, she knew that she needed to face her fears. It was like the ant-tank all over again. They were alone in the room and it was just him with her, smiling and so what if he was laughing, because there was no way he was going to tell. She still wasn't over her fear of ants, but she felt safer around them when he was there and it was a step in the right direction.

She wanted that comfort again. She wanted to prove she still felt that trust.

"Okay," She whispered and he watched, sitting back on his haunches as she fiddled with the hem of his long shirt. She edged it up, nibbling on her lip as she pulled it up to her stomach and Eric smiled, looking down at her as she paused.

"It's alright," He whispered, leaning over and pressing a kiss to the edge of her bellybutton. "take as long as you need."

Calleigh sat there, looking down at him for a good minute. His eyes were so open and loving and with the feel of his fingers drawing invisible circles around her belly, she felt comfortable and for the first time in a while, she felt pretty. Her hair was so short and wispy she'd only just started to style it and her face, while slowly filling out, was still a little pale. But she felt it, in it's smallest measure.

Sitting up, she gently pushed him back until they were facing each other again. Her legs were slightly bent, stretched out beside him and with a deep breath, she pulled the shirt up and over her head. Dropping it on the floor beside the bed, Calleigh stared off at the wall, knowing that he was looking straight at her and she had to actively fight the urge to cover herself with her arms. Tears sprang to her eyes and as her arms started to win the battle with her mind, Eric's hands, stopping her raised wrists, surprised her back into looking at him. There was love there, in his eyes and for a moment, she thought that he hadn't yet seen. But he was looking down and his eyes were reddened just a little at the corners, his lips were dry and as his thumb ran circles along her lifeline, she knew what he was seeing.

"Cal," He rasped and she dipped her head, pressing her forehead into his chest to hide from the pity. "hey, no." He pulled her back up, meeting her eyes with a determined smile. "Don't hide," he whispered and she let him gently lay her back down against the pillows. His large hand was splayed across her back and as he lay her down, it stayed there, craddling her as he slipped down to press his stomach to hers, though he didn't rest his weight on her at all. "I told you," He continued to whisper. "you are gorgeous."

Calleigh choked out a sob, unable to control her tears any longer as he pressed a kiss to her lips. Eric's fingers trailed a seering pattern down her throat to rest on her chest, he kissed her there, over her heart and she held his head in her hands as he found the very edge of her scars. The tissue was still red and Eric knew that it would be tender, so he kept his kisses light and as gentle as he could manage. He pressed kisses all across her left breast, holding her hips in his hands as he moved, slowly, to the right to repeat the process. Calleigh shivered just a little, smiling through wet tears as he held her up, returning to her lips and holding her whole body against his.

She found a way to forget her fears and Eric, as he discarded his boxers and gathered her into his arms, holding her tightly to his chest, did everything he could to remember so that he could keep them at bay.

* * *

_**There is nothing like a dream, to create the future.**_  
~ Victor Hugo

* * *

Calleigh sat perched on her stool in her lab. The CSI from night-shift was working on an overtime case, test-firing a weapon in the range, so she had the door closed between them and the dulcet tones of 'Secret Garden' playing on her stereo. Because Ryan had complained about the "annoying irish stuff" that he could hear all the way down in Trace, last time she'd attempted to play 'Celtic Woman' she'd decided that the only very slight change would either have him rolling his eyes and complaining more - to which she'd only shut him down - or it'd teach him a lesson that she wasn't going to change her taste in music, just for him. And she knew for a fact that it couldn't be heard outside the ballistics lab, because the only legitimate music complaints she'd ever heard about were those when Valera was going through her Heavy Metal phase, and the walls of the Ballistics lab were three times thicker than the rest. Ryan had just walked in when she was listening to a particularly Irish song, actually performed in Gaelic, and had felt the need to offer up complaint. As Ryan did.

She was catalogueing bullets, as she had been doing for the better part of the last two weeks, when the doors opened and the laughing voice of Frank met her ears. "Wolfe's gonna love this." He was snickering and Calleigh grinned, fluttering her lashes.

"It's not his lab," Was her answer and with a nod of his head, Frank felt that was acceptable.

"So, Horatio said you had something for me?" He questioned, stepping up to the bench and Calleigh looked up at him.

"I do indeed," She hopped down from her stool, awkwardly rolling her shoulders as she made her way around to his side.

"You alright?" He frowned, noticing the movement and Calleigh smiled up at him, appreciatively.

"Yeah, I'm fine, I just ache sometimes." She smirked, pulling a file out of her stack and handing it to him. "I got a match on your bullet, it was a .223 and the stria match a gun used in a bank heist three years ago," She lent her hip against the counter, looking up at him.

"That's great. Hey, you take care of yourself, alright."

"Detective Tripp," She smirked playfully. "whatever would I do without you?"

Calleigh's mind drifted to the dream she'd woken up with that morning, the eyes of the little girl and the kindness there that she'd seen in everyone she knew. There was a part of all of them in her, Eric's beauty, Ryan's boyish laughter, Alexx' gentleness and Horatio's compassion. She had all of their best traits and she realised, that in her mind she'd created the perfect vessel for all of their best features, seeing the honesty of the little girl's smile, in Frank's just now.

He just laughed, moving to leave the lab but he stopped suddenly when movement out of the corner of his eye, caught him off guard. Calleigh stumbled, her palm slapped against the counter-top as she desperately grabbed for something to hold on to and in an instant, Frank was by her side with his arm around her waist, holding her againt his chest. The file he was holding, fell apart on the floor with papers going everywhere, but he didn't care about that in that instant. "Calleigh," He shook her and she breathed in deeply, grasping the lapel of his jacket. "are you alright?"

"I just," She took another breath. "I just moved and I got dizzy and," She curled into him. "is it cold in here?"

"This isn't good." He muttered. He dipped down, hooking his arm under her knees and lifting her up into his arms. Calleigh didn't protest and that alone amazed and scared him. She was breathing and she was concious, but she was holding her eyes closed tightly. "I'm going to get you to a hospital."

"No," Calleigh pressed her palm to the doorframe, forcing Frank to stop. "please."

"Fine," He relented easily and Calleigh let go, allowing him to carry her out into the hall as she dropped her head into his chest. "next best thing then." He hurried, ignoring all the worried eyes that followed him the length of the lab, the people that stared at them as he waited for the elevator and he even, almost, growled at those that didn't get out of the elevator fast enough for him to get in.

* * *

"Alexx!" The woman looked up sharply, staring at Frank as he staggered into the autopsy room, carrying Calleigh in his arms. He had his bottom lip sucked in and as he pushed the door open with his back, she could tell he'd carried her about as far as he could.

"What's going on?" She gasped, reaching for Calleigh quickly, helping him place her down gently and taking her hands in her own as they untangled her arms from around his neck.

"We were talking and she was smiling and then she just, fell." He explained, holding Calleigh up with his hand at her back, and doing his best to prevent her from tumbling forward. But she pressed her own hands to the autopsy table, smiling her thanks up at him as she took in a few deep breaths.

"I'm fine," She breathed. "I just had a little spill, that's all."

"Honey, Frank just carried you all the way down here and you're going to tell me he did it for nothing?" She frowned and Calleigh smiled softly, realising her point and allowing her to reach up to touch her hand to her forehead. "You're a little warm, can you tell me what happened?"

"I just got dizzy all of a sudden and then I felt chills."

"She alright?" Frank pressed and both woman looked to him, smirking. "Forgive me for being concerned." He growled and Calleigh quickly reached for his hand, to stop him from stomping off.

"Has this happened before?" She questioned and Calleigh looked down at her feet that were dangling off the table, thinking. She didn't want to tell Alexx that it seemed to happen every time she revisted her dream, unsure as to whether that would label her as crazy or not, so she kept it to herself, biting her lip at the faint spin she felt just thinking about it in that instant before looking back up at Alexx.

"Not nearly that bad," She thought about it. "I've had dizzy spells, but I've never felt that I was going to pass out before."

"And for how long?"

Calleigh frowned. "Not long after my surgery, I think. Do you think it's got something to do with the medication?" She asked, panicked but Alexx' hand on her knee, calmed her.

"No, honey, I don't. But I think you might need to get that medication checked with your doctor to see if you should be taking it right now."

"But I still get sore," Calleigh looked at her, confused.

"I know," Alexx smiled. "I just think you should call Eric and get him to take you to your doctor to get a second opinion."

"On what?" Calleigh questioned, staring into Alexx eyes as she gripped her hand, completely oblivious as to where this was going. Alexx wasn't really all that surprised. As observant as Calleigh was, sometimes the really important things, like the attention of a certain Cuban hottie could go unnoticed for a very long time. She endured and she endured and she pushed through discomfort and heartache when she didn't have to, all because she was unable to face things she wasn't quite ready to face.

Frank had wandered across the room, scrubbing his hand over his face as they waited and when the words left Alexx' lips, even he froze in surprise.

"I think you're pregnant, baby."

Calleigh's breathing all but stopped. Frank turned around on the spot and it was just enough movement in her line of sight, to snap her out of it. She looked up at him, staring at him for a moment before looking back to Alexx. She swallowed, pressing her eyes shut tight before she blinked them open with new tears. "You," She choked. "you think that I'm-" She stopped herself with her fingers pressed to her lips and Alexx could barely contain her smile as well.

"Yeah, honey, I do." She whispered.

Calleigh wept, falling foward into Alexx' arms, laughing and crying into her shoulder at the same time, not quite sure which her body wanted to do first. Alexx looked into Frank's eyes over her shoulder, smiling as he studied the back of Calleigh's head, and she knew, that he was as happy for their young friend as she was. "I never thought," She choked. "I just, my god, Alexx," She lent back, looking into her dark eyes. "really?"

Alexx chuckled and hugged her friend again, ushering Frank over with her free hand and grinning when he complied, not even hiding his joy when Calleigh switched from hugging Alexx to hugging him. He just laughed and wrapped his arms around her just as tight, letting her, let it out.

TBC.


	21. Chapter 21

I know that a few of you weren't actually sure if the previous chapter meant Calleigh was really pregnant or not. It was intentionally, somewhat, ambiguous. I hope this clears up any queries now.

* * *

Calleigh was pratically wearing a hole in the floor of the lobby as she paced back and forth from the Reception desk to the elevator. Horatio had been watching her for a few minutes, standing just in the shadows of the corridor, out of her line of sight, but close enough that he could see the frustrated frown-lines between her brows. She stopped in the center, looked down at her phone and sighed heavily before starting up her pacing again. He took one step towards her, dipping his eyes to the floor as she ran her fingers through her short, fly-away hair. "Is something the matter, ma'am?" He questioned, twirling his sunglasses around his fingers as she came to a stop in front of him, staring at him.

Calleigh looked down at her phone before looking into his eyes. "Um," She frowned again jostling herself from foot to foot as he watched her, smiling gently. "I've just been trying to call Eric. But it seems he's too far out to get a signal." She tucked the phone into her pocket.

"Is it anything I can help you with?"

Calleigh smiled appreciatively, taking a deep breath to calm herself because she realised that her anxious pacing must have set off alarm bells in his head. "No, I don't," Calleigh cast her eyes across the lobby, taking a few steps towards him as she pinched her fingers together in front of her. "I don't know," She smiled.

Horatio smirked, nodding his head. "So I got a rather curious phone call from Alexx," He dipped his head lower, looking up at her through his pale red lashes when her head whipped back to him and her eyes set firmly on him. "is everything alright?"

Calleigh chewed on her lip, eyeing him carefully and trying to work out how much he really knew. Horatio obviously picked up on it, by the way Calleigh's cagey expression was surveying his features.

"She said you weren't feeling well." Horatio omitted that she had informed him Calleigh had arrived in the Autopsy theatre, huddled in the arms of the burly Homicide detective because he didn't want to frighten her away from telling him anything she might otherwise tell him, if she were to think he knew less than he actually did. She liked to give tid-bits of information, whether she actually enjoyed it - he didn't know - but he felt that it was perhaps her way of controlling the emotion in the situation. If she were to think he knew too much, she'd close off, and that was the last thing he wanted.

"Oh," She waved her hand in dismissal. "I just, you know," She laughed. "I got up too fast."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah," Calleigh doled out a winning smile and for a moment, he was convinced. But the smile didn't reach her eyes and the way her fingers twitched over the pocket that contained her phone, had him curious as to what was really troubling her. He would admit that the news of her near-faint had troubled him and the fact alone that Frank had felt the need to carry her all the way down to Alexx, had the bells ringing in his ears, but her anxiousness now, her need to get in contact with Eric had his heart pounding with worry.

Because Calleigh didn't behave in this way, ever.

"Is there anything you need?" He questioned, glancing over as two uniformed officers were transporting their suspect through to interrogation. Calleigh's eyes followed the trio and Horatio knew, somewhere in her complex labyrinth of a brain, she'd found the bill-board surrounded by neon lights that said 'Interrogation with Horatio, 3PM.' Calleigh's heart sank and Horatio could see it. Her shoulders slumped and she reached for her phone again, this time not just hovering over her pocket. She flipped it open and she cast him a glance before hitting her speed dail. She waited and to her comfort, Horatio waited along with her. She received nothing but a busy signal and slammed it shut in frustration.

"Apparently not." She growled, turning on her heel and stomping off towards the interrogation room. But a few paces down the hallway, Horatio's hand at her elbow stopped her in her tracks.

"Calleigh," She turned to him, her eyes glistening just a little and her breathing a bit laboured. "what's going on?"

Calleigh dropped her eyes to the floor, studying the shine of his shoes as she licked her lower lip. "I just," She took in a deep breath. "I need to speak to Eric."

"Look, ma'am, if you're not up to this interrogation, Frank and I can handle it."

Her eyes shot up. "No," She said quickly. "no, Horatio, I analysed the evidence. I should be the one to tell him that he shot himself in the proverbial foot."

Horatio chuckled, dropping his hand from her elbow with a smirk. "Alright," He said softly. "but the minute you feel you can't handle it, you just tell me, alright?"

Calleigh nodded, smiling a more genuine smile. "Thanks, Horatio." Calleigh nodded her thanks, along with her verbal response and hesitantly took a step back before she turned around and walked into the interrogation room. He watched her carefully take a seat at the table, he watched how Frank's worried eyes followed her movements and how he carefully held the chair out for her. The two men shared a glance and Horatio offered him a reassuring smile, passing between them a shared concern for their pint-sized colleague's well-being before Calleigh's voice addressing their perpetrator drew Frank's attention back to her and Horatio pulled his phone out and dialed a very familiar number.

_"Wolfe."_ The voice on the other line answered.

"Mr Wolfe, I need you to do me a favour."

"_Sure, H, what's up?"_

"I need you to call Eric. Now, he's not answering right now but I want you to keep calling until he does."

"_Is everything alright, H?"_

"Nothing to worry about, Ryan, just when you get in contact with him, have him call me. Can you do that?"

"_Yeah, sure, not a problem."_

"Thank you." Horatio flipped the phone shut, tucking it in his pocket as he strode into the interrogation room just as the perpetrator was beginning to sweat buckets under Calleigh's scrutiny because she'd poked canyon-sized holes in his statement with irrefutable ballistics evidence. Her panicked, flustered demeanor was completely gone and the image of it exsisted now, only in his mind as a faint memory. Before him was the Calleigh he knew, with the calm, controlled and determined manner of a woman who had artfully mastered her profession.

One he greatly, greatly respected.

* * *

_**"So small a part of life is taken up by meaningful moments."  
**_~ _Prince Chulalongkorn_, Anna and the King

* * *

Calleigh sat with the box dangling from her fingers. It jiggled each time she bounced her knee and she managed to pass the time by watching and waiting for it to finally reach the point, in her less than determined grip, that it hit the floor.

Eric had driven her to work that morning and whilst she was grateful that it gave her less of a reason to refuse a lift home, she knew that as soon as Natalia - whom Horatio had enlisted for the task - had reversed out of her driveway, she dashed into the garage and started up the engine of her Crossfire. She'd waited a few moments, making sure her friend was well and truely gone before she had hit the button to open the garage door and raced out to the nearest drug-store.

She'd scratched her fingernails along her palm the entire time she'd watched the adolescent boy scanning her purchases through and she'd smiled gratefully, if a little embarresed, as she swiped her credit card and made a hasty retreat from the store.

Now, sitting on the edge of the bathtub with her bare feet twitching on the cold, dark tiles and the hem of her pencil skirt brushing against her calves, Calleigh had begun to think that three minutes was entirely too long to wait. She'd set the three small tests down on the vanity, all of them placed directly parallel to one another. She'd looked down at them, running her sweating palms across the fabric of her skirt on the front of her thighs and she took a deep breath, sitting down to wait.

She'd tried to reach Eric so many times over the course of the afternoon, but whenever she tried he'd been out of range. She figured that she shouldn't panic, ever since he'd started up the business and word had filtered around that a kind-of retired Miami-Dade crime scene diver was giving tours of the reef, business had rolled in like a tidal wave. He was out on the water every moment she was in the lab and there had even been a few days when he'd arrived home in darkness. She didn't begrudge him his work, in fact, she was entirely too proud. But at the very moment she was perched on the edge of the bathtub with her knuckles between her teeth, listening to the dull thud-thud-thud of her heel hitting the ground nervously; she couldn't help but wish getting in contact with him was just a little bit easier, if only today.

The sound of his keys in the front door, startled her and her head shot up. She dropped her palms to her lap and took a few deep, shuddering breaths. When her own name rang out through the house, her heart-rate slowed but the heat of the blood pumping through her body just intensified. "Calleigh!" He called again and she could hear the panic in his hasty footsteps. "Horatio called me, he said you've been trying to call all-" He stopped suddenly, standing in the void between their bedroom and the main bathroom just beside the tiny, antique, pull-pony her grand-mother had willed to her because she'd spent her toddler years begging that she be allowed to play with it.

"Hey," She whispered, not having realised that she'd descended into hopeful tears until she heard the choke in her own voice.

"Hey," He dropped to his knees in front of her, not even noticing the box when it finally dropped to the ground because he was too focussed on her eyes. He wrapped his arms around her, rising up on his knees between her legs, pushing her skirt back to get nearer and holding her close, pressing his palm to the back of her head as he kissed her and lent back just far enough to see her. "what's going on? H. said you've been calling all day."

"How did he find you?"

"He said he had Ryan calling my cell every five minutes." Eric chuckled. "He just got lucky, I guess." Calleigh's eyes widened a little at the help Horatio had given without even telling her he had, even when he didn't know the reason why she was so desperate to find her husband. She made a note to thank him, sometime soon.

"I was," She smiled, wiping at her eyes. "I um, I had a little incident today."

"What kind of incident?" The panic in his features made her want to kiss him, but she refrained for a moment.

"I just had a little spill, it's alright, Frank was there and I'm fine but Alexx had some concerns. I was trying to call you because I needed to tell you what she thought."

Eric brushed his thumb along her hairline, pressing a kiss to her brow as she dropped her hands to his shoulders. "What did she think?"

"Well," Calleigh tried to quell her trepidation. She was scared and nervous and just a little bit excited. "we're actually going to find out if she's right, together. I, um," She pointed to the vanity behind him, smiling as he resisted turning for a moment, unwilling to let her leave his sight, even for just a moment. But when he did, and his eyes fell on the three white sticks on the counter-top, his hold on her tightened and he spun back around. "She said that what happened shouldn't have anything to do with my medication; she said that she thought I might be pregnant."

Eric's eyes were wide and completely open. In his face she could see hope and excitement, just a tiny touch of fear and so much love she thought she was going to roll over in bed and wake up to find herself alone with an empty tub of Haagen-Daaz on the nightstand, coupled with a weathered spoon because she'd spent another evening wallowing in self-pity and another night, dreaming about a beautiful future with her best friend, that couldn't possibly be real.

"Pregnant?" His voice was husky and a little strangled and she grinned uncontrollably when he cleared his throat, tried the word again and it still sounded no different.

"Yeah," She smiled, brushing her fingertips over his temples, down the side of his face and across his collar-bone. "I thought that we'd have to wait. I thought that with the chemo, it'd be hard for my body to get back to the way it was, but Eric," She dropped her hand to her abdomen, pressing her palm down on the silk of her blouse over her flat stomach, and she smiled. "I think she's right." She wasn't quite ready yet, to tell him that she thought it was what the dream was trying to say. Even she wasn't sure she beleived that just yet, but as time ticked over, it was becoming more and more clear.

He swallowed, licking his lips and watching her fingers twitch against the silk. "So you got three tests, right?" He questioned and Calleigh nodded, holding on to him as he pulled her to her feet. "But if it's not positive, we just keep trying, right?"

"Of course," She wrapped her arms around his waist, happy that without her shoes, she fit perfectly beneath his chin. "we never give up." She whispered and Eric hugged her tighter, guiding the pair of them back to the vanity.

"How long since you," He paused and Calleigh laughed, letting go of him for a moment as she stepped in front of him, between his body and the tests. His arms came around her waist, allowing her arms freedom to pick up the first test, though refusing to break the connection between them as she checked her watch.

"We have about thirty more seconds." She stated and Eric nodded, resting his chin on the top of her head, looking at her face in the mirror.

"You really think she's right?"

Calleigh smiled, looking up at him in their reflection. "I didn't, at first. I mean, it never even crossed my mind because I thought like everything, this wasn't going to be easy. But when I really think about it, there has been signs." She breathed out slowly, picturing the little girl's face from her dream and she lowered her voice to the point where she had almost resumed a sense of calm. "They're small signs, but if I look hard enough, I can see them."

"That's good enough for me." Eric grinned, dropping a kiss to the nape of her neck. He continued to flower her with kisses, leaving a trail along her neck as he followed it up behind her ear, pressing a kiss to her hairline as she squirmed and called his name on a breath.

"What?" He questioned, still kissing her, completely oblivious that their thirty seconds was well and truely up.

"Eric," She breathed again, raising her hand behind her and resting it at the back of his neck, stilling his movements. "look at this."

The first thing Eric looked at was her shaking hand pressed to the counter-top. Her fingers were twitching and her wedding rings were glistening in the flourescent light. Then his eyes drifted the few inches across the black surface to rest on the three white sticks, each sporting a very destinctive, very affirmative, pink line.

"Eric," She breathed again, unable to say anything but his name without faltering.

"False positives are rare, Cal." He grinned, somehow feeling that he needed to jump right in and reassure her straight off the bat as he lifted the last test on the right, between his fingers, to study it.

"But they're possible."

"But they're rare." He reiterated, placing the test back down and carefully, pressing his palms to her stomach. She watched him intensely in the mirror, she held her hands in the air because she wasn't entirely sure where to put them and with her back pressed into his chest, she smiled at the way his large hands spread out to cover her entire belly. "And you're pregnant." He whispered, shivering when she finally pressed her palms to the back of his hands.

"Our baby." She stated, resting her forehead against his temple as he lent around to press a deep kiss to her lips.

"Our baby." He agreed, kissing her again as if it were the last time he'd ever kiss her.

* * *

_**Love is just a word; What matters is the connection the word implies.  
**_~ Rhama Kundra

* * *

The breeze outside the house had the leaves dancing against the window-panes. The darkness that had crept in on the tail of the day had brought with it a thick warmth that made the air dense and the smell of the ocean closer than it was. Eric had opened the back doors, the lights from the patio shone through the living room casting shapes in shadow across the wall as he lay there, on the long chaise lounge, with Calleigh's small body curled into him.

She made a small sound, that to him, was as melodious as the crashing waves in the distance and as he slouched further into the warmth of their embrace he found his hands moving to the one place he was, so far, unable to ignore. Laying her back against his chest with their legs tangled together, Calleigh asked him if he thought they'd ever get to where they were. He laughed gently, hugging her tighter and keeping his hand firmly, protectively, pressed to her stomach as he whispered. "Never in my most amazing dreams." And if it had sounded overtly cliche, she didn't say a word.

"Eric," She spoke softly, shuffling in his embrace, but not moving away. "you know the dreams I've been having, with the little girl?"

"Yeah?"

"I think," She paused, fiddling with a button on his shirt. "I think they were trying to tell me about the baby."

"Really?" He sounded curious and much to Calleigh's relief, he hadn't laughed.

"Yeah, I mean, she kept telling me that she was who I wanted her to be and the way she looked at me, it was like she knew something I didn't. I just feel that something has started to go right and that's what the dream was trying to tell me." She smiled against his shirt, hugging him. "I've been so scared this past year and I still am because my cancer could come back at any time. It could spread, it could get worse and this baby, Eric, anything could go wrong. But the dream, it just," She sighed deeply, closing her eyes and enjoying the feeling of his fingers in her hair. "it's made me realise that something good can come of all this. I was hoping and wishing that we could catch a break and finally, something came so unexpectedly."

"If anyone deserves it, Cal, it's you."

"And I thought I had everything eight years ago when you and Speed showed up at my door to take me scuba diving at four in the morning."

Eric barked a laugh. "That's when you thought you had everything?"

"Yeah," She laughed with him, kissing his chest. "I had the best friends a girl could ask for and I wanted for nothing. I never thought it could get any better."

The room around them silenced until all they could hear ahead of them were crickets hiding in the garden and all they could feel was the breeze cutting through the warm air as it danced across their skin. "I wish he was here, to see us." Calleigh whispered and Eric could feel her tense against him. So he kissed her temple and dipped his hand under her shirt so that he could touch his fingers to her belly with nothing between them.

"Me too." He smiled against her hair.

"I think he'd be happy about it, don't you?" Calleigh questioned.

"Yeah," Eric sighed. "you know, he warned me away from you."

"Really?" Calleigh's voice sounded both surprised and intrigued.

"Yeah, he said I should be careful with you. He said he'd kill me if I asked you out. Of course, he didn't know we'd already met and you'd already shut me down." He smirked. "He also told me, never to tell you he said that."

Calleigh giggled. "Why would he say something like that?"

Eric shrugged, knowing and agreeing with Speed's reasoning wholeheartedly. "You're a forever girl and he loved you for that."

Tears sprung to Calleigh's eyes and she buried her face in his chest. "I miss him." She whimpered and Eric did his best to comfort her, knowing talk of Speed always reduced them to this.

"Me too, Cal," He whispered. "me too."

TBC.


	22. Chapter 22

I really want to thank **HeartRevolution** for helping me with my spanish! Biggest thanks!

* * *

The first thing Eric and Calleigh did, when they had more than a few hours together over the course of the following three days, was to get an appointment with a Doctor. Sitting in the waiting room, Calleigh was nervous but Eric's large, steady hand around her small one kept her cool and collected until the portly Doctor made his way out to greet them. In a fluster, when he'd called on 'Mr and Mrs Delko' Eric had immediately thought the man was asking for his parents, but Calleigh stood and pulled him to his feet to follow.

The Doctor was a round man who wore a jacket and waist-coat, complete with a fob and chain and he couldn't help immagining that his neices would love him. He had an appearance that immediately conjured images of a sleigh and a fluffy red suit and when he smiled, through his thick salt and pepper beard, both he and Calleigh felt comforted by the warmth of his manner. He'd patted Calleigh's hand gently and she'd decided that she liked him, when her breathing had finally evened out because she could see the picture of their baby on the ultrasound and had realised that it was all so very real.

She was ten weeks pregnant, so the ultrasound had said and with a printout that had 'Baby Delko' written in the top right corner, they'd left the Doctor's office happier and more at ease then when they'd gone in. With laughter, they'd debated who to tell first when finally, after no answer at her Mom's house and her Dad muttering something about meeting up with her later that night, they'd dropped a copy of the photo with a message on the back, under Charlotte's front door and headed off to Little Havana. And Calleigh didn't even make the smallest comment about her parents never being there when she had the greatest news, because for the first time in her life, it drifted over her with a shrug and a smile from Eric.

"_Mami, estas en casa?" _Eric called as he carefully opened the front door. The car was parked in their driveway and they could see the lights on in the livingroom from out on the street, so he knew they were there. Holding Calleigh's hand in his, they made their way into the house and Calleigh gently closed the door behind her as she followed him through, into the kitchen. Still, they weren't to be found until Calleigh's suddenly hypersensitive nose and grumbling belly noticed the slightest hint of barbeque in the air. Eric laughed at her, kissing her quickly before he pulled her out into the yard and almost cringed when his mother's squeal of excitement reached his ears.

"Calleigh, Eric!" She practically bounded towards them and Eric was at the point where he was finally over the fact his mother had come to always address Calleigh first. He put it down to her relief that he'd finally settled down with a woman she could both respect and cherish and apparently, completely adore. So he wasn't as disappointed by it as he'd played at in the beginning and he knew that it didn't mean she loved him any less. "Come," She ushered them over, dragging Calleigh by her elbow until she took a seat at the table, smiling her greeting up at Pavel who had a barbeque utensil hanging from his fingers. "this is such a lovely surprise." Carmen smiled, sitting down beside Calleigh before Eric could take the seat. Eric glared up at his father when he laughed but as a peace offering, the older man handed him a beer.

"Well, actually, Carmen we've come because we have some news." Calleigh smiled, blushing a little under Carmen's intense yet loving gaze.

"What is that, _mija_?"

Looking up at Eric with his beer casually resting in his hand, leaning against the barbeque pit he and his father had built with own their hands when he was a boy, Calleigh laughed nervously before reaching into her handbag. She had to jostle a few things around, doing her best to not show off to Carmen that her gun and holster were always with her before she found the photo and carefully extricated it, setting it in her lap before she looked back up at them. "Come on, Cal." Eric encouraged but she sighed and stood up, rounding the table to wrap her arms around his waist.

"They're your parents, Eric, I'm going to get enough drama telling mine. You can do it." She smirked up at him, looking down at Carmen again when the woman turned around to them.

"Alright," Eric set his beer down, taking the photo from Calleigh's fingers. "this," He held it up, taking his time to spin it around and set it on the table in front of his mother, who stared down at it in awe and amazement. "is your new grandchild."

"_Un nieto?_" Carmen whispered with glassy eyes, and turned to meet Calleigh's that were such a drastically different colour, but held an emotion no different from her own.

"_Si, mama._" She beamed, taking with a laugh, the hug that Carmen leapt up to give her. She could see Eric's father out of the corner of her eye, offer his only son a warm, loving embrace and she was glad, after all of the drama about his paternity, that they could come back together and share the moment that Pavel had always wished he'd see. Pavel had known for a long time, that Eric was not his blood. But he'd spent years raising the boy and loving him as his own that to hear it had changed nothing. He was his son in every way that mattered to him and to know that he was starting a family of his own, was the greatest joy he could have ever imagined. So he thanked him and he kissed his son's cheeks before he moved to Calleigh and held her tight, hugging her to his side as they watched and laughed at Carmen dotting kisses all over Eric's face.

* * *

_**These little wonders,  
These twists & turns of fate.  
**~ Little Wonders, _Rob Thomas

* * *

"Horatio," Calleigh smiled as she noticed his shadow cast across her face. It was early and she'd arrived at the lab when the sunlight was still creeping across the horizon, but she hadn't been able to sleep. Eric was a log beside her, snoring just a little bit and she'd laughed at herself, with her hand pressed to her belly as she stared at the dark ceiling. What she'd been fearing, she knew, was that she was going to have to go to Horatio again, for the second time in a year and tell him that she was going to be taking a considerable amount of leave. She was so excited for the baby, so hopeful for what it meant for their lives, but she just wished that she could miss out all the difficulties in the middle. She wished she didn't have to look Horatio in the eye again and tell him that she was willingly letting him down. "I didn't know you were here." She looked away, shuffling along the bench just a little.

"I saw you from the parking lot," He inclined his head, taking a seat beside her. "is something troubling you?"

"No," She spoke softly. "I mean," She chuckled. "I'm happy." She looked him in the eye, seeing his concern and she remembered then that she had something to thank him for. "I wanted to thank you, for what you did the other day. You found Eric and you didn't have to. I really appreciated that."

"That's not a problem, ma'am." He rested his elbows on his knees, edging a little closer with a gentle smile. "So everything was alright?"

"Yeah," She nodded. "I just," Calleigh was brushing her hands along her thighs and she looked out to the ocean just ahead. The morning was beautiful, coating the water with an orange glow and she could imagine the beams of light that would be shining through the lab behind them. She loved it, every inch of that building and she didn't want to imagine a day, even if it were far into the future, that she didn't have that lab to return to. It had become as important to her as her own home, the people inside and their smiling faces, almost as important to her as having Eric to return to every night. The baby was just amazing on top of that and she wanted to share that with Horatio. "I'm pregnant, Horatio."

She turned to him, studying his features as he watched a flock of birds scatter in the distance as a cyclist passed them by. He was silent and for a little while, she thought it was because he was disappointed but as he pressed his lips together and dipped his head in her direction, she caught the first signs of a smile at the corner of his mouth. Still, she felt the overwhelming need to explain herself. "I'm sorry, Horatio," She took a deep breath, shaking her head. "actually, no, I'm not sorry that I'm pregnant but I am sorry that it's happened now. I mean, I've just had so much leave and now, here I am asking for more and I know it's too much but-"

He cut her off, holding his hand up between them as he squinted against the sunlight, not even realising that he hadn't put his sunglasses on as the sun rose higher above them. "It's okay."

She slumped her shoulders in surprise. "Really?"

He smirked. "You've worked for me for twelve years, Calleigh, without so much as a sick day. You need the time and you need this. Take it." He met her eyes, touching her knee with the back of his fingers. "I'm happy for you."

* * *

_**Let it go, Let it roll right off your shoulder  
Don't you know, The hardest part is over  
Let it in, Let your clarity define you  
In the end, We will only just remember how it feels.**_

* * *

Starting off a Monday with a murder-suicide was never the best way to go. But that's where the CSI team had found themselves that morning and even with Calleigh's all-too-cheerful personality lighting up the place, moods were fairly dark and attitudes were at their most dismal levels. Ryan was running a lead with Horatio, both of them hoping it could turn up something on the mentality of their killer and somehow explain why he'd killed his wife before shooting himself in the head with a double-barrel shotgun. Calleigh was processing the ballistics evidence of not only that case, but three others and Natalia and Jesse had the entire bench in the evidence locker covered with possible useful or useless evidence.

"Did you hear about Calleigh?" Natalia asked conversationally, dangling a magnifying glass over the hem of the killer's jeans, checking for Trace. Neither she nor Jesse had noticed Ryan join them in the locker and when Jesse looked up to answer her, he was cut short by rude interference.

"What about Calleigh?" Ryan butted in on the question that was very obviously aimed at Jesse, not even caring that the man seemed to look up at him with a level of disdain that implied he was imagining the many varying ways he could kill the younger man without leaving a trace. Ryan noticed his expression, but instead of apologising, he drummed his gloved fingers on the edge of the bench, looking to Natalia with curiosity.

"You mean you didn't hear?" Natalia grinned, completely oblivious to the heated moment that passed between the men and excited to know something that Ryan didn't, even though it was not the first time she'd been in such a position. "She's pregnant. About ten weeks."

"No way," His jaw dropped. "you're lying."

Natalia dropped her hands to the counter in appal. "Why would I lie about that, Ryan?"

He shrugged, studying the expanse of their evidence with his eyes.

"I knew." Jesse smirked, blissfully carrying on with the deep study of a pair of bloodied sneakers as Ryan stared at him.

"Now you're lying." Ryan spat.

"I have no reason to."

"Well you have to be," Ryan crossed his arms over his chest defensively. "because why would she tell you before she told me? It doesn't make sense."

"She didn't tell me." Jesse shrugged.

"Well then who did?"

It was a battle now, Ryan staring at Jesse, attempting to crack him whilst Jesse carried on as though he were completely unaffected. It had been going on since the day Jesse had arrived, a constant give and take for Horatio's approval or Calleigh's affection; sometimes they fought for Natalia's but much to her chagrin, it was only on days Calleigh had off. Frankly, she found herself tiring of it but the effort required to pull them off one another wasn't worth it, in her mind. Instead, she just quieted herself, taking a metaphorical step back and let them slug it out. Natalia put it all down to small-dog syndrome and likened Ryan to a Poodle with anxiety issues that was forced to deal with a Boxer encroaching on it's family. And she also enjoyed laughing to herself, at the analogy.

"Horatio did." Jesse answered, off-handedly and Natalia blinked when she noticed Ryan practically seething.

"He did not. Horatio doesn't spread gossip."

Jesse dipped his head, unbothered. "He told me, perhaps he doesn't consider it gossip. But I'll be stepping in for her as supervisor while she's on maternity leave."

Ryan scoffed and Natalia found herself looking between them as though she were watching a heated tennis match.

"You?" Ryan practically shrieked. "Why you?"

"Well, I'm the more experienced CSI." Jesse's eyes were innocent and somewhat oblivious. Natalia considered saving him, but the prospect of this verbal tirade of Ryan's, becoming comical, was too good an opportunity to pass up.

"Not in this lab, you're not."

"Excuse me?" Jesse furrowed his brow, never quite sure where the animosity between the two of them had started.

Ryan opened his mouth to reply, when Calleigh wandered into the locker from Jesse's end of the room. "Hey guys," She grinned, flipping through a case file as she walked, completely unaware of the tension in the room. "what have we got here?" Jesse eyed Ryan carefully, ensuring that the younger man wasn't going to make a scene in front of her as he reached for the bloody sneakers, lifting them up to show Calleigh.

"There appears to be a void in the spatter, so there was something in front of him when he shot."

"What do you think that could mean?" She questioned, putting her file down and paying him her full attention whilst behind her Natalia was slapping Ryan's arm every time he moved to open his mouth.

"Well, I was thinking it was nothing, but the hairs Natalia's found on the husband's jeans suggest that there was someone else in the room, considering neither of the victims were blond. She's going to run the DNA once we finish up here, right Natalia?" He smiled up at her and she nodded vigorously when Calleigh looked to her.

After a moment of strange looks and Calleigh having to look from Natalia to Jesse to Ryan in confusion, she twigged that there was something she was missing. "Is everything alright?" She questioned, opening the floor to no one in particular.

Ryan opened his mouth, but the back of Natalia's hand impacting his stomach stopped him short. "No," She grinned, doing her best to ensure Ryan stay silent. But the task was simply too difficult. When the dog set eyes on the bone, there was no holding him back because eventually, the leash was going to snap.

"Is it true you're pregnant?" He blurted out and Natalia looked to him in shock at his complete lack of tact. If she thought about it, that was indelibly Ryan's most prominent character feature and she really shouldn't have been surprised. But she figured Calleigh had been keeping her pregnancy to herself for a reason and didn't want Ryan to go traipsing dirt through her privacy.

"Excuse me?" She blinked and laughed nervously. Jesse rested his hand on her forearm, attempting to do what, he wasn't sure, but soothing her building aggravation seemed like a beneficial enough goal.

"It's just, I was wondering," Ryan stuttered, looking to Natalia for an ally only to find himself stranded on an island where foot-in-mouth ran rampant.

Calleigh cleared her throat, gathering up her files before she took a hesitant step away from the bench. Her privacy had been violated and with the look on her face, Ryan wanted nothing more than for the world to swallow him whole. He put aside the fact that he really wanted to know, in favour of wishing he could disappear if he wished hard enough.

"I," She stammered, making her way to the door. "yes," She nodded, fiddling with the edge of her files. "I am, actually." She breathed and she was gone before another word could be uttered. Natalia and Jesse watched her dash across the hall and close the door to the ballistics lab. From what little they could see of her, through three doors, a gate and a hallway full of people, she'd dropped her files onto her work-bench and disappeared into the range, out of sight.

"Nice one." Natalia glared at Ryan, stepping away from him and rounding the bench to stand beside Jesse.

"I'm sorry." He uttered, but the furrow in her brow didn't disappear. "I am."

"Yeah, well, you know what, Ryan?" Natalia snapped at him. "Think about other people the next time you open your mouth to speak, alright."

* * *

The phone was ringing and Eric had his hands buried in the sink full of water. He tried to crane his neck around to see where Calleigh was, but when she didn't come running for the phone, he rolled his eyes. "Calleigh!" He shouted. "Phone!"

"Can you get it, I'm in the bathroom." She answered back and he grumbled, reaching behind him for a dishtowel that wasn't there. He rolled his eyes again, typical, and the phone kept on ringing. He had to laugh, because Murphy's law was really playing with his head right now. He shook his hands in the sink, reached for the phone with as few wet fingers as possible before hooking it between his ear and his shoulder. "Hello?"

He almost dropped the phone at the pitch of the voice on the other end. It was Charlotte and within seconds, he immediately regretted how they'd left the photo of the baby, under her door. She was ranting and rambling and Eric could barely make out a word. And he was beginning to fear that the shreiking she was doing was going to, eventually, dislodge the bullet fragment from his brain.

"Calleigh, it's your Mom!" He held the phone as far away from his ear as he could, waiting for her to come down the hall. And she did, dressed in a pair of his sweat pants pulled as tight as she could, around her hips and a white tank-top. Freshed faced and glowing because she'd only just made it home from work.

"Mad or happy?" She whispered and Eric passed her the phone, shrugging.

"I'm not quite sure. She's speaking southern."

"It's not another language, Eric." She chuckled, taking the phone.

"It is when you guys ramble so much the accent starts to blur."

She just laughed, pressing the phone to her ear as she wandered off, back down the hall. "Hi momma," He heard and he had to chuckle the moment she had to start defending herself over the phone and begging her mother not to drive over to their house right at that instant. Not only was it that her father was supposed to be there for dinner, but Calleigh and he were hoping for a quiet night in front of the television.

* * *

Anxiously, Ryan rapped his knuckles on the front door and shuffled his feet as he heard someone moving towards it. "Hey, man," Eric greeted, glancing behind him for anyone that may have come with him, but upon realising he was on his own, he furrowed his brow. "what's up?"

"Ah, is Calleigh home?" He questioned.

"No," Eric shook his head. "she's at her Mom's but she'll be back soon. Seriously man, what's wrong?"

"Can you give this to her?" Ryan held out a little white box, wrapped prettily with a yellow ribbon. Tentatively, Eric took it, but he was still confused. "Just, ah, tell her that I'm sorry, Will you?" He dipped his head. "I was a bit insensitive today and I wanted to apologise. That's just," He pointed to the box. "a little something for the baby, congrats, by the way." He tucked his hands in his pockets, stepped back down onto the path.

"Thanks, Wolfe. I'll tell her." Eric watched his friend wander down the path, waving his hand over his head as he left.

TBC


	23. Chapter 23

A lot of you probably have _no _idea how difficult it was for me to write "Flip-flops" instead of "Thongs", lol.

* * *

**_Mothers and daughters are closest, when daughters become mothers._**  
~ Anonymous

* * *

As she shut off the engine, Calleigh glanced both left and right to ensure that none of her mother's neighbours were standing out on the street. She wasn't a shy person, likely never had been, but there was a difference between being shy and not wanting to be seen in public in her television clothes. Dragging her handbag across the passenger seat, Calleigh picked up the pair of red flip-flops she'd tossed into the car as she'd sped out the driveway and with the car-door open, she dropped them onto the pavement and carefully slipped them onto her feet. She was head to toe in the most comfortable clothes she owned, Eric's battered sweats that were a few sizes too small for him, a tank-top and a Tulane hoodie that had seen better winters. And even in the dull light of the evening, she didn't want to be caught unawares by someone who might just recognise her, especially considering she had quite the reputation at the lab, for her designer suits, her silk blouses and her exceptionally high heels.

Not that vanity was really an issue either. But she'd been on television and many of the people of Miami, who were any kind of avid watcher of the news, could put a face to her name if ever they heard it in the right context, and she had colleagues that lived in Coral Gables, she was well aware of that, so she wasn't in a hurry to be caught outside in clothes she'd much rather be curled up on the couch with her husband in.

She dashed up the front path, calling out her mother's name as she gently pushed the front door open.

"_Down the hall, Calleigh_!" Her voice answered and Calleigh eyed a stack of boxes she had to squeeze past as she closed the front door behind her. "_Sorry about the mess, I'm moving things about, trying to get everything in it's place._" Calleigh listened to her muttering about odds and ends in this box and that as she carefully manouvered her way through the maze of boxes to find the back end of her mother poking out of a trunk in the living room as she rifled through it.

"What are you doing?" She couldn't help but chuckle just a little at how Charlotte's foot flew up in the air with the effort it took to pull something out from deep in the box.

"Getting this." Charlotte grinned triumphantly, nodding her head to Calleigh as she held out a small box covered in dust. Calleigh dropped her bag and her keys on the nearest flat surface and carefully, curiously, took it from her. "When I saw that little picture on my step this afternoon," Calleigh looked up quickly, noticing nothing but pride in her mother's eyes as she gestured for her to keep opening the box. "I knew that I had to find this."

"What is it?"

"Your great-grandmother made it; she was pregnant with your grand-mother, my mother, at the time," Charlotte smiled, resting her hand on Calleigh's forearm as she pulled the lid away to reveal a beautifully hand-sewn quilt made of reds and creams. "and she wanted something for her to be able to keep and pass on."

"Why didn't you ever use it?" Calleigh studied it carefully, running her fingers along the fine stitching, completely in awe.

"You know me, Calleigh-girl. I was never the one for sentimental things. In you, your grandmother saw a little piece of herself - that's probably why you and I have always butted heads - but she wanted me to give it to you, when the time was right." Charlotte smiled brightly, tentatively touching her fingers to Calleigh's cheek. "I think now is the right time."

To Calleigh, the gesture was too much. But after years of neglect and confusing messages sent backwards and forwards, she somehow felt that they'd made their way full circle. She knew there was no way she was ever going to forgive her mother all of her wrong-doings, nor was there a chance she'd ever understand her reasoning if she tried. But there was love there and after so much heartache, the mere idea that the love was still being offered, made her want for nothing else but peace between them. And when her arms flew out of their own accord to embrace her, she felt that somehow, that peace had been attained.

"Thank you, Mom." She grinned, wiping away a tear as she lent back. "It's so beautiful."

"So," Charlotte sniffed away her own tears, standing up a little straighter. "what do we think? Is my new little grandchild going to be a boy or a girl?"

Calleigh laughed out loud, happy to feel so at ease with Charlotte as she held a hand over her belly. "I don't know," She grinned. "up to his eyeballs in neices and I think Eric still wants a girl."

"And with his eyes, and your smile, she'll be one pretty little girl." Charlotte smirked, hugging her again and kissing her temple as real mothers and daughters do. "You're going to be a better mother than me, Calleigh." She whispered, holding her daughter tight to her chest and Calleigh barely caught the sob that escaped her, before her mother noticed. She couldn't even barely comprehend how much those words meant to her. In one sentence her mother had both given her the praise she'd always longed for and accepted that, as a parent, she'd always come up short in a large way.

* * *

_**I remember I thought you looked like an angel wrapped in pink so soft and warm.  
You've had me wrapped around your finger since the day you were born.**_  
~_ My Little Girl_, Tim McGraw

* * *

"Make yourself at home." Eric grinned, waving Duke towards the stools that lined the other side of the kitchen counter as he stirred the pasta. "Calleigh's just gone to see Charlotte but she should be home any minute." Eric didn't know what kind of relationship Duke had with his ex-wife but he knew, from what Calleigh had said and not said, that they hadn't exactly parted on fantastic terms. Now, at the mere mention of Duke, Charlotte didn't come around for dinner and when Charlotte was mentioned, Duke clammed up tight or spontaneously changed the subject to baseball.

"You watching the game?"

Eric chuckled. "Calleigh'll change the channel as soon as she gets here, but you can switch it on."

Duke made his way over to the couch, slouching down in the plush lounge-chair as he grabbed the remote and switched the television on. But his eyes weren't drawn to the television. As soon as he sat down and even as soon as he looked in that direction, what caught his eye was the small creased photograph sitting propped up against Calleigh and Eric's wedding photo on the top of the cabinet. He stood up, dropping the remote back into his chair as he made his way over. "Hey, you like bolognase, right?" Eric called.

Duke nodded, glancing back at the younger man who had his back to him. "Yeah, sure."

He'd been wondering why Calleigh had been so desperate to speak to him earlier in the day. He'd been busy with a new case, getting back on the horse with a few easy cases just to get the feel of it again and he'd been trying really hard to prove himself to the firm that had taken him in on the reputation of his name alone. He'd been so distracted that he hadn't realised what she was trying to say could possibly have been so huge.

With shaking fingers, Duke reached up for the photo. He touched the corner lightly, just to see that it was real and not just a mirage conjured by his hopeful old brain and then, once deciding it was tangible, he dragged it down to study it closer. It was small, blurry and dark. But he knew exactly what it was. In the corner was Calleigh's name and in the other corner, were the words that made his heart stop beating for just a second. "Baby Delko." He breathed, barely above a whisper and certainly not loud enough for Eric to hear. Somehow, he felt different than he had both times Wyatt had told him Melissa was pregnant. He loved Cora and Emily more than he could say, but something about the idea of his little girl being pregnant just broke the old man down.

He managed to keep the tears at bay, holding them back as he tucked the photo behind the blissful wedding snap and took a deep breath before he turned around. Eric offered him a glass of sweet-tea and he took it gratefully, with a smile. As soon as it touched his tongue though, he knew that Calleigh had made it and with a shuddering breath he had to set the glass down on the table.

Eric had turned the stove off, dinner was ready, and now all the two men had to do was sit and wait for Calleigh's return.

Minutes passed in silence. Eric sipped his tea quietly, because when Duke was there he had the manners of a true gentleman and didn't touch a beer, watching the game with his socked feet up on the coffee table. "Calleigh said you were working cases again?" He broke that silence, filling a lull in the game, taking another sip and resting his glass on the arm of the chair.

"Yeah," Duke nodded. "I thought since I'm dedicated to staying sober now, I might as well be doing something."

"That's great."

Duke wondered how Eric could be so calm. His wife was pregnant, Calleigh, _his_ daughter. He couldn't barely believe that Eric was lounging in the chair with his feet up and his shoulders relaxed, nursing a drink without a care in the world. He couldn't believe that he wasn't chomping at the bit to tell him the news.

He didn't have to wait much longer though, because the sound of Calleigh's car pulling into the drive had Duke's head whipping around like lightening. He stood immediately and he tried to ignore the strange expression that Eric had on his face as he watched him move towards the hall. Eric slowly stood, dragging himself to his feet as the front door creaked and they could hear the sound of her keys being dropped down on the wooden table.

"Eric," She called, wandering into the house and kicking her flip-flops off in the hall. When she saw her dad she froze and after a moment of staring into his eyes, just breathing, she gently set the quilt she was carrying, down on the back of the couch and stepped towards him. "Daddy."

"Hey lambchop," He choked, rather surprised that he'd managed a coherant greeting at all. "how are you feeling?"

Within an instant, Calleigh knew that her father knew. How, she wasn't sure, but by the look in his eyes and the sound of his voice, he knew. Tears pricked at her eyes and as he smiled that smile she faintly remembered looking up at when she was a little girl, on nights he'd actually tucked her in sober, she wanted nothing more than to be held by the arms that had warmed her during thunderstorms and the hands that had touched her cheek so gently when she cried over a grazed knee. It was that moment that brought back all of the good memories that were buried under a mountain of bad. And she could see, right down into his heart, that her childhood could have been a whole lot worse if her parents hadn't loved her as greatly as they did, even if they weren't able to show it.

Duke's arms were suddenly around her and her face was buried in the lapels of his grey suit jacket. His bow-tie tickled her forehead and as she glanced over to Eric, she was glad to see his smile. "I wanted to tell you earlier." She whispered and Duke shooshed her, holding her tighter.

"It's alright, lambchop," He cooed. "it's never too late to make an old man happy."

Eric served dinner and Calleigh watched her father intently as he told Eric stories about what a beautiful baby she was. He went on for the entire meal, about how, from the moment he set eyes on her through that window into the hospital nursery, he'd fallen in love with the brightest, largest set of green eyes in the room, topped off with a tuft of thick, crazy blond hair. In his stories, she was the most beautiful, the smartest, the most alert and that from the age of three, she was his lambchop with bows in her hair and dirt scuffs on her over-alls. She found herself enjoying the stories, seeing an excited side of her father that she'd rarely seen in the past and she held Eric's hand tightly between their plates on the dinner table and smiled when Duke noticed.

When the lights started to dim on the conversation, she learnt that each promise to quit drinking he'd made to her mother, had always started with her name and that he wanted to be able to love his little lambchop and give her everything she deserved. And he made a promise, his last and final promise as he gripped Calleigh's hand across the table, that he'd never touch a bottle again. He'd ruined his chances so many times over, with her, with Wyatt. So much to his shame, even Emily and Cora had seen him on the cusp of his worst. This baby was his last and final chance and he promised, kissing her knuckles and reaching up to brush her tears away, that he wasn't going to ruin it again.

He promised that her baby was never going to know that man. And it was the first time Calleigh's hope outweighed her skepticism.

"Well, who'd have known Calleigh Duquesne would ever run down the street in her underwear." Eric chuckled, rolling his head over the back of the couch as Calleigh returned from seeing her father off. She glared at him, playfully, swatting at his cheeks as he tried to still her hands.

"I was five years old, Eric, and I was making do without a swimsuit and a puddle instead of a pool."

"And you ran down the street?" He snickered and Calleigh rolled her eyes.

"Dad told me I had to wash the mud off," She shrugged. "apparently I didn't want to."

Eric grinned, pulling her around the couch to drop into the cushions beside him and he rolled forward, leaning his face into the tank-top covering her and pressing kisses to her stomach. "You're full of the best surprises." He kissed her again, smiling against the fabric as she ran her fingernails over the back of his head. "Hey," He sat up suddenly, just enough to meet her eyes. "I meant to ask you, what happened with Ryan today?"

"Oh," Calleigh frowned. "it wasn't anything really, he just caught me off guard. He asked me if I was pregnant, in front of everyone. It was just a little embaressing but you know Ryan."

"Yeah," Eric nodded. "I do. And he doesn't normally come grovelling."

"What do you mean?"

Eric turned around the the side table at his end of the couch, remembering the small present he'd put there specifically so that he wouldn't forget where it was. "He brought this by. He asked me to tell you he was sorry." Calleigh smiled regretfully, taking the small package from his fingers and slowly untying the ribbon. She lifted the lid on the tiny box and when she looked inside, she grinned happily.

"Oh," She breathed. "look, Eric." Holding up the tiny pair of knitted white booties, Calleigh's heart melted into a puddle. "We're really having a baby, aren't we?" She asked, quietly, almost as though she wasn't completely sure she could trust her own judgement and that of Alexx, three pregnancy tests and a reputable Doctor because Eric hadn't yet declared it to be true.

"Yeah, Cal," He took the booties from her, setting them on the coffee table before he threaded his fingers with hers. "we really are."

* * *

Calleigh arrived at work the following day with a wider smile on her face. She headed into the lab, put her things away in her locker and with a determined stride, she made her way directly to the Trace lab where she knew Ryan would be, because she knew he wasn't on a call-out. "Morning Ryan," She greeted cheerily, noticing how he hesitantly smiled at her, flinching a little and she knew he was wondering when the ball was going to drop. "I wanted to thank you," She pressed her palms to the counter, practically boucing in the spot. "the booties are gorgeous. It was just that afternoon, how did you get them so fast?"

She was beaming and obviously after realising the intention of her mood, Ryan picked up on her sincerity. "Ah," He bit his lip and shrugged. "my Aunt owns this little baby-care boutique over in Coconut Grove, I called her. I just wanted to say I was sorry, what I said yesterday was out of line and you deserve your privacy, I know that. I didn't think, Calleigh, and i'm sorry."

"Hey," She waved her hand with a grin. "don't worry about it. Just," She smirked. "i'd appreciate it if it didn't happen again."

"Yeah," He nodded vigorously. "sure thing, no problem, never again."

Calleigh giggled and Ryan took note that it was the first time he'd ever actually heard her giggle, let alone that he was the one who'd caused her to do it and it made him smile. "Well, i've got ballistics to process." She nodded, patting his gloved hand before she turned on her heel and left the lab.

Ryan had to blink a few times to make sure he was actually awake. He watched her walk out of the lab and laughed at how she seemed to be so much happier that day. She was normally cheerful, she was known for it and on so many double shifts where he'd been ready to scratch his own eyes out with a blunt spoon, he'd been grateful for it. But it was different somehow, freer, maybe? He wasn't quite sure but he knew it was different and that in a round about way, that was a good thing. He thought she looked a little heavier about the middle, but he wondered if it was just the fact that he now knew. Sort of like a placebo only working if you think it's the real thing.

He knew she was pregnant so he saw her pregnant but as far as he knew, it was perfectly possible she wasn't even showing yet.

Ryan shook his head, shaking away his wayward thoughts as he went back to work. And he was relieved that she was alright because he wouldn't ever tell a soul that he'd tossed and turned most of the night, terrified that she'd be mad at him for letting his mouth run away from his brain.

TBC.


	24. Chapter 24

Hi guys, I know that it's been a very long time since last I updated and there is actually a very good reason for that. I've been painting a beautiful old Colonial-style house out in the country for the past week and I must say, it's looking gorgeous. My Aunt is having the whole place renovated and it's now got amazingly beautiful verandas that go all the way around the house, twelve foot ceilings with pressed metal detailing. It was a lot of work, I'll tell you that. We had to fill the cracks in 18 veranda posts, sand them and paint them (three days), fill, sand and undercoat one of the bathrooms and oil the veranda decking...not to mention I cook, so I was cooking for them all week. I'm a little dead, but it's all good! Anyway, this is a new chapter just from a bit of a different perspective. Hope you like.

* * *

**_I know there's something in the wake of your smile.  
I get a notion from the look in your eyes.  
~ _**Roxette

* * *

It was Melonie's first time on spring break. After weeks of convincing her friends that the money was worth it, she and the three best friends she'd ever had, planned to take the week in Miami, Florida. They'd spent the week partying and swimming, their hotel was full of people their age, gathered together for the same purpose, sunshine and a damned good time. They'd been shopping in Coconut Grove, wandering through the cafe-style shops and the bohemian markets and she had a suitcase full of cheesy Miami souvenirs to take back to chilly Chicago; they'd taken a tour through the canals to see the homes of the rich and famous because Alisa was obsessed with mansions and material things and it made them laugh at how excited she got when the tour-guide mentioned which houses were owned by what celebrities. They'd done all of the regular tourist things, as well as a circuit of the clubs on two consecutive nights so, after perusing through a bunch of pamphlets in the hotel lobby, Melonie's eyes lit up when she discovered what they were going to do next.

Ada and Carli were determined to take a reef tour sometime whilst they were there, considering they were both science geeks and loved everything remotely related to aquatic life. And when Melonie had seen the pamphlet advertising "_Aventura Salvaje Reef Tours_", she was fascinated by the blurb on the back about a guy who'd started up the business on his own and once she read it aloud to her friends, eyes sparkling at the idea that he used to be a cop, with a badge and a gun, they knew they had to do it. "Miami is so awesome." Ada had squealed in excitement. "None of the tour guides on the Chicago buses are nearly that interesting." Carli added, grinning as she snatched the pamphlet. "And my god, he's gorgeous." She shrieked, holding the pamphlet out wide for the other three girls to see. In the centrefold, there was a dark-skinned man with a broad, white smile wearing board-shirts and a company polo shirt as he leant against the edge of his tour boat.

So standing on the edge of the pier with their beach clothes tucked in shoulder bags, laughing at Alisa in her high-heels with make-up caked on as though she were going to a party, not actually planning to go diving in the ocean, they were ready and waiting for him to arrive. The day before, Melonie had made the booking for the four of them, grinning as she listened to his voice over the phone, hoping and praying he was as gorgeous as he looked in the pamphlet and sounded on the phone. She knew it was shallow of them, but she couldn't get past the fact that they were on spring break, they were young and they were supposed to be shallow.

"There he is," Carli whispered, tugging on Melonie's sleeve anxiously and she looked up, seeing the tall man swaggering down the pier wearing a pair of steel-framed sunglasses, a wet-suit tied around his waist that reached down to his ankles, flip-flops and a white company polo shirt with the top two buttons open. She'd have drooled if she weren't in such a public place.

"Good morning ladies," He flashed them a knee-weakening smile as he removed his sunglasses and tucked them over the collar of his shirt. "I'm assuming one of you is Melonie?"

"That'd be me, Mr Delko." She raised her hand shyly, knowing that she was blushing, but she was unable to stop it.

"Well then, we'd better get this tour going," He smiled to each of them in turn, guiding them onto the boat and with a smirk, Alisa gave Carli a look when the man held out a hand to help her down into the boat in her heels. Carli inwardly grumbled, catching Alisa's cheeky expression and she immediately regretted not wearing heels herself. "so I've got suits over here," He gestured to a trunk next to the locked up cabinet where the Scuba gear was kept. "you should find your sizes in there and we're just going to wait for one more passenger before we can get underway."

"I'm Ada," Ada held her hand out boldly to shake his, fluttering her eyeslashes in such a way that had her three friends rolling their eyes at her. But he was nothing but gracious, shaking her hand as he grinned.

"And I'm Eric," He turned to address all four girls. "you can all call me Eric."

"Is it true you were a crime scene detective?" Melonie questioned, shimmying out of her jeans and down to her bikini before pulling the knee-length wet-suit over her feet.

"Yeah," He nodded as he pulled five scuba-tanks out of the cabinet, setting them on the deck. "I was."

"That must have been interesting."

"Oh it was," He grinned, setting the tanks on the deck in front of each of the girls before he sat down on the edge of one of the seats, to adjust his own personal tank. "working different crime scenes is always interesting, mostly it's about the puzzle and when you solve a case, the feeling you get when the criminals are put away makes you proud that you're doing something good for the community, I loved it. Are any of you girls interested science?" He looked up at them and Ada and Carli had their hands raised slightly. "It's a great field, with boundless possibilities. Hell, I was a tow-truck driver before I was a cop and science really helped me get out of there and into the field that I fell in love with. You wouldn't believe the amount of interesting stuff people toss into the Everglades when they're committing a crime." The girls were hanging on his every word, listening intently to the sound of his voice and smiling when he was excited by his story. "I was mostly on underwater recovery, that's the processing of underwater crime scenes."

"Wow, that's pretty cool." Ada grinned and he nodded up at her, obviously happy to have a genuinely interested listener even if the rest of the girls were ogling his muscles through his thin cotton shirt.

"Yep, you know if it wasn't for my bachelor in chemistry I completed for the sake of a baseball scholarship, I wouldn't be where I am today." He smirked, tossing one of the old tubes on his tank aside, to set it with another one. Melonie couldn't help the thoughts that went through her head, mostly consisting of - 'Thank god for chemistry' but before she could consider continuing the conversation, a thickly accented voice from behind them caught her off-guard.

"I don't know, I think the physics involved in bullet trajectory is far more invigorating."

The four girls watched his head shoot up and his face erupt in a blinding smile, immediately wondering how he could possibly smile any wider than he had done when he greeted them. And as he stood up and made his way over to the small ramp, they all turned their heads to see who was standing there.

It was a woman, that was the first thing that Melonie noticed because it wasn't nearly difficult to tell that from her voice, she was short, that was the second. The moment her eyes were set on her, she could tell that she was beautiful, stunning even and with her blond hair in a wispy Victoria Beckham cut, just to her shoulders, her smile lit up the space between her and the devilishly handsome cuban man closing the distance that kept them apart. It wasn't until he held his hands out to her and gingerly helped her down into the boat, that Melonie even realised that she was at least five months pregnant. She was wearing short white shorts and a pair of brown flip-flops. Her shirt was long and a vibrant green but on closer inspection she could see how it's shape fit pulled around the rather pronounced belly in front of her.

"Girls," He grinned, still holding tight to the woman's hands until he'd guided her all the way over to a shaded seat by the captain's wheel. "this is my wife, Calleigh." He was beaming and on the inside, all four girls, regardless of the sweet appearance of the woman, weren't fond to hear of her wifely status. He didn't seem to have noticed though and considering their dignity, Melonie was quite glad. Apparently not all things on spring break went the way they were planned and Melonie noticed how the woman's, Calleigh's, hand pressed to his lower back as he spoke. "I hope you guys don't mind, she's going to be coming along for the ride today."

"Trust me, I won't get in the way of your tour. It's somewhat impossible for me to get into a wetsuit these days," She laughed, brushing a hand over her belly and Melonie noticed both Ada and Alisa smiling brightly. They were the two most likely pushovers of the group, completely smitten with anything that had anything to do with babies.

"Oh that's fine," Ada beamed, jumping up and moving over to sit beside Calleigh. "how far along are you? Do you know if it's a boy or a girl?"

Calleigh giggled and Melonie took note of the look that passed between husband and wife. As she studied them, she decided that they really did look like one of those couples you see in magazines with their bright smiles and their perfect complexions. Apart from the woman's height and the small detail that she was pregnant, she could see both of them gracing a catwalk and she shook her head with a laugh, and the thought that Miami really held up it's glamorous reputation. They were flawless and she was hard-pressed to imagine that anything could go wrong for them. She was so used to failing science classes and tripping over the curb every day as she walked from her dorm to class that she couldn't barely picture them doing every day things or suffering everyday woes.

She couldn't imagine that things in their lives had ever taken the difficult road because honestly - and she was honest with herself when it was only her mind hearing the stark truths - they were gorgeous. She immediately didn't want to admit it about the woman, Calleigh, because for some reason her cynical mind had just reflexively turned against her. She didn't want to admit that with her crystal green eyes and her hair the colour of soft wheat fields with sunlight shining through the reeds, that she was anything more than averagely pretty. But she was, significantly so and Eric, well, she'd decided on his appearance from a pixelated photograph on the crease of a pamphlet, so that wasn't hard to admit there. The baby was certainly lucky, that, she would admit.

Melonie's own life was in upheval, which was why she'd insisted so furvently on the trip with her girlfriends, down to the sunny shores of Miami. She was still trying to decide whether she was better off accepting David's request to take her out, or if she should go with the bad boy in Andy and studying for finals had totally knocked her out. These people, with their easy smiles and their little bundle of hopeful joy, couldn't possibly know what it was like to have so many troubles and issues packed on top of her that she'd literally needed to travel across the country to get some air.

Of course, she had no idea that each and every one of those 'easy smiles' were hard and deservedly-earned.

Calleigh's voice hesitated on Ada's question, Melonie noticed, because she was doing her very best to find a fault worthy of disliking her as she attempted to look like she wasn't paying attention. "Well, ah," Calleigh ran a hand over her round belly. "I'm about five months. And," She looked up at Eric and Melonie noticed how they shared a silent little conversation that could barely have lasted more than a second and would have said a whole lot less, were it spoken. "we don't actually know yet, what we're having."

"Are you going to find out?" Ada asked again and Melonie rolled her eyes. Her younger friend - by two months - had obviously found a new idol in the short statured blond and while that normally made her laugh, the way she seemed to find women to idolize as regularly as Alisa found boyfriends, it just made her feel a little sick in the back of her throat.

"No," Calleigh smiled, being nothing but polite and friendly. Melonie wanted to grind her teeth because it was becoming harder and harder, not to smile along with her. She was a little ray of sunshine and maybe, Melonie thought, if she were wearing a hat and maybe some sunglasses, it'd be easier to ignore. "we're going to wait and see. It's our one and only, so we're just hoping for healthy."

Melonie's ears pricked up. One and only. She could use that, if it implied what she immediately assumed. She could see that before the baby belly, this woman was very obviously athletic, running, she'd say and perhaps a little martial arts too. Swimming, she thought on that, most definitely. By the way she dressed and the tasteful amount of make-up she wore, Melonie could see a woman like her believing that any more than one baby, could ruin her body forever. She listened closer as Carli moved to join the conversation.

"You're only having one?" Carli asked, looking curious and considerate, as was Carli's way. Melonie definately gave her credit for being the diplomat of the group.

"Yeah," Calleigh sighed and they all took note of how she partially hugged her belly. "I had a year's window to get pregnant, after that, I'm afraid it likely won't be possible."

"Why?" Alisa asked, softly and sweetly.

"I ah," She looked up at Eric again, though this time Melonie noticed that it wasn't a shared joy in their eyes, but something else. That something darker that moments ago, she didn't have the imagination to see. "I have a medical condition, I just, I can't risk any more." She knew, by the finality of her tone, that they weren't going to get any more out of the woman and by rights, she'd already divulged quite a lot for someone who came across as somewhat shy and almost saccrinely sweet in her opinion.

"So," Ada cleared her throat. "what do you do for a living? I mean, you already said that you love the physics of bullet trajectory, or something like that? Right?"

Calleigh giggled, obviously past her brief dark moment, lighting up the boat with a smile. "I ah, I'm the head Ballistics Expert for the Miami-Dade PD. I mostly work with guns, bullets, shell casings, tool-marks, stuff like that."

"Wow!" Ada's eyes lit up. "That sounds so fun!"

"I think you've got a convert, Cal," Eric chuckled, making his way into the cabin.

"Maybe," Calleigh laughed back before turning back to Ada. "It is actually a lot of fun, when we get a weapon on a case, I usually have to test-fire it and cross-reference it with our data-base. I've had some fairly strange things come through my lab."

"What was the weirdest?" Carli asked and Calleigh chuckled, biting her lip in thought.

"I think, maybe the harpoon, do you think, Eric?"

"Broadsword," He threw over his shoulder and Calleigh's face lit up.

"Yes!" She beamed. "The weirdest was a medievil broadsword. It was fascinating and the designs on it were gorgeous."

"Wow, that's really cool. So, you're a physicist?" Ada asked and Calleigh turned to her, smiling with a thoughtful expression as she slowly nodded her head.

"I suppose you could say that. I have a degree in physics and quantum mechanics. I'm just fascinated by the way things work. The mechanism of a firearm is so intricate," She beamed. "I've loved them since I was a little girl." Melonie looked up as she spoke, utterly flabbergasted that she was hearing these words coming from the pink, glossy lips of a five-foot-tall, five-month-pregnant, blond, southern belle.

"She loves to take them apart." Eric chuckled, flicking through some paperwork.

"Really?" Carli grinned.

"It's a little fun, pulling it apart to see how it works, to see how it connects to another crime." She shrugged. But they all looked in Eric's direction as he scoffed.

"She holds the department record for the fastest dis-assembly and reassembly of a standard issue 9mm firearm." He grinned and Calleigh blushed.

"Is that true?" Melonie asked, incredulous and Calleigh looked up at her. It was then Melonie noticed how large her green eyes were and wondered that if she looked at her long enough, she'd just keep getting prettier. Or perhaps it was the less she liked her and the more she envied her, the prettier she got. She wasn't quite sure.

"Yes, it is true, actually." She could tell the woman wasn't quite sure how to read her, but a point to her credit, she was nothing but polite.

"So you work with guns, do you have one?" Ada asked and Calleigh blinked before smiling.

"Probably more than I should have. But I'm distracting you all, Eric has paperwork for you to sign and I'm just getting in the way." She moved to stand up, but Eric's hand on her thigh as he sat beside her, stilled her and Melonie ignored the shudder she felt through her shoulder-blades as she noticed the gesture.

"There is no way you're walking around on this boat, Cal." He smirked and somehow he seemed surprised that she listened to him. It made Melonie curious, but not enough to ask about it. He started divvying up forms for the girls to fill out, pulling his tank out of the way and over in front of Calleigh where she continued to fiddle with it as he spoke. "Now, unfortunately we can't go out on the water without you ladies filling out your insurance waivers. Now you've all dived before?" They all nodded. "Fantastic, that makes my job a hell of a lot easier then. And I just want you to understand, when we're out there, you can't break away from the group and I've got a strict, no criminal activity on the boat, rule. She may not look like it and you might wonder where she could possibly have it," He waved his thumb over his shoulder, indicating his wide-eyed wife with a chuckle. "but she's always armed and we're not going out as far as international waters, so she's got the power to arrest and hold you."

Calleigh smirked, studying the back of his head and the girls giggled a little behind their hands. Melonie was even able to find the humour in her expression and started to wonder, from what little they'd learnt of this woman, if she could actually come to like her were she given the time to really learn about her. She could see from the get-go that Eric was an easy-going, casual guy who obviously had an intensely soft side if the way he handled her like she was made of glass was any indication at all. He seemed genuinely smitten with the woman that seemed just that little bit more mysterious than he did and Melonie couldn't help but be completely intrigued by them.

She liked to study people, likely that was why she was studying pshycology. And people like these, who seemed so completely unmarred on the surface, fascinated her. Because as she hunched over to sign her form, glancing up at them as they waited patiently, she could see something pass between them that they hadn't showed when they knew they were being watched. He gripped his wife's hand tightly, pressing it to the top of her leg against the hem of her shorts and the pale skin of her leg. They were looking at each other and while they were smiling, there was a tremor on the woman's lips that had her thinking. And then she had questions, a million and one questions about them and their lives and wanted to hit herself for being so nosy. She didn't have a right to ask questions, but the the more she looked, the more she wanted to know and she really wanted to learn whether or not, under their perfect facades, they were scarred just like the rest of them.

They all practically jumped out of their skin when the sound of a phone ringing shattered the silence of scratching pens. The girls looked up, noticing Eric dash across the cabin to the green handbag that they hadn't noticed perched on the counter and started digging through it as the ring-tone got louder. "It's H." He stated, handing the phone to his wife and watching her as she flipped it open and answered it with:

"Duquesne."

Melonie shared a look with Ada before turning back to eves-drop on the conversation, even though the woman wasn't even trying to keep her voice down or her subject a secret. "Oh my god, yes, okay. Sure, Horatio, I'll be there as soon as I can." She slapped the phone shut and immediately, Eric had his arm out to help her stand, grabbing her handbag for her and dropping it into her free hand.

"What's going on?" He whispered and all four girls recognised a deep, shuddering breath.

"A kidnapping," She rasped. "a four-year-old boy. Eric,"

He nodded and Melonie studied the way his hands rose to her upper-arms, squeezing gently. "You'll find him, Cal."

"Horatio wants me to speak to his parents, he said they're expecting a ransom call within the hour and he wants me there with the mother."

"You're going to be alright?" He ducked his head and Melonie decided that he'd almost completely forgotten that the four of them were even there. But watching them, they way they disappeared into each other, she decided that she no longer, honestly, minded at all. He was too old for her anyway and what little crush all four of them had on him in the beginning was purely superficial. They were there to dive and she knew that that was what she'd ultimately wanted to do. And he was a nice guy with a nice wife and she was happier, looking at them in that light. It made things easier and it made the effort less, to smile up at the woman as she nodded her goodbyes. "Yeah, I'll be fine." She whispered, taking his hand as he guided her back to the ramp.

"I'll see you tonight," He smiled, craning his body up to kiss her lips as she forced a smile against his mouth.

"Yeah." She agreed and watched him as he dipped down and pressed a kiss to her belly.

"See you later too," He whispered, kissing her belly again before she turned and made her way carefully down onto the sturdy pier. She waved goodbye to the girls and they watched her go, smiling and Melonie realised that considering the woman's job, she probably saw a lot of horrible things that the average person never saw. She was probably witness to more atrocities than they showed on the news, and she found herself all of a sudden respecting her. It came out of left field and she was so stunned by it that she blinked but she wasn't ashamed of it. It took the woman leaving with a faint sheen on her eyes, for her to realise that there was a lot more to her than met the eye.

"So," Carli started, fiddling with the edge of her tank as Eric made his way slowly back towards the cabin and started up the boat's motor. "why is it you stopped being a cop? Because you kind of look like you really wanted to go with her."

Eric shrugged, turning around with a faint smile on his lips. "It was be with her or be a cop. The choice wasn't all that difficult."

Melonie chewed on her bottom lip to stop herself from asking questions. Because with each little tid-bit, she just wanted to know more, but she knew she shouldn't ask. She wanted to know why that decision had to be so black and white, she wanted to know why he'd quit being a cop and she hadn't and she wanted to know just what about this woman made her worth giving up what seemed to be a dream career for this guy. But she resigned herself to the truth that she was never going to know. And she just had to be content with being so intrigued it continued to itch at the back of her mind.

TBC.


	25. Chapter 25

Whoops, typo. Okay, so in chapter 24 I wrote that Calleigh said the little boy was 6-years-old. He's not, he's four. It's been updated now but apologies if you're reading it and thinking a little bit along the lines of - "WTF?"

* * *

_**There is no better heart to understand the depth of a mother's love, than that of another mother.  
**_~ Anonymous

* * *

Carefully climbing down from the Hummer, Calleigh smiled at Tripp as he was making his way towards her from where his car was parked against the edge of the curb. Stepping up to her, he held her hand unneccessarily and helped her down the final step to the ground below, smirking at the awkward way she tugged at her jacket even though he wasn't aware that getting back _into_ the Hummer, was what was going to pose a problem for her. She'd dashed home as soon as Horatio had called, doing her best to find appropriate clothes to wear to the scene but it had been getting progressively harder for her work clothes to fit. The only pair of pants that she could find, were a pair of black slacks that matched a jacket she knew was now too small to do up over her belly and she'd hastily grabbed a magnolia coloured maternity blouse Carmen had given her that pulled tight just below her breasts but flowed down around her bump gently. She was happy with what she'd found, but had made a mental note to move her plans to go shopping with her mother, up a couple of weeks.

She blinked, smirking with her lips pressed into a thin line as Frank reached over her and grabbed her kit from the passenger seat, closing the door of the Hummer for her. She would have said something, had he not already begun guiding her up the front walk to the door. "Horatio's inside," He said, gesturing for her to go first past the officer standing in the door and she rolled her eyes at the low hanging crime-scene tape across the threshold.

With Frank holding the tape up for her, she ducked under it and while that wasn't all that difficult, she knew it was only going to keep getting harder.

She watched him as he made his way across the living-room, greeting Horatio and indicating her standing by the door, just off the kitchen and she smiled softly when Horatio met her eyes. She studied the room laid out around her, there were uniformed officer's going in and out, she caught a glimpse of Ryan's maroon jacket down the hall and she could see the small evidence markers lining the carpet to the room he was in. The kitchen counter was decked out with an array of call tracing equipment and she had to take a deep breath, not even noticing the hand she pressed to the top of her belly, as she turned her eyes to the small family sitting bunched together on the couch.

The woman was small, with dark hair and dark eyes. Her husband was taller, Calleigh could tell by the way his feet were stretched out under the coffee-table. Sitting between them, with a hand on each of their knees was a small girl, no older than five, with her face buried in her father's shirt. "Mrs Fuller, Mr Fuller, this is Officer Duquesne," He gestured her over and upon hearing her name, she kindly inclined her head and took the two small steps down into the room, with a careful stride.

"I'm so sorry for what you're going through." She placated, trying to offer her condolences with a kind, if strained expression and the woman seemed to acknowledge her, looking her way, but the husband just kept running his fingers through his daughter's hair, watching the officers moving about their home.

"Officer Duquesne is going to take some exclusion samples from you and if you need anything, you just ask her, alright?"

Mrs Fuller nodded her head in Horatio's direction, glancing at Calleigh again before attempting to sit her daugther up. Calleigh nodded to Horatio as he and Tripp disappeared down the hall and she thanked Tripp quietly as he handed her kit back to her, before doing so. "My name is Angela," The woman spoke up with a raspy voice. And meeting her eyes, Calleigh could see that she'd been crying.

"I'm Calleigh." She smiled softly, slipping her gloves on as she took three swabs from her kit and opened the first.

"What are you going to do with those?" The husband asked, finally acknowledging that she'd taken a seat on the sofa, just beside him as he turned to her.

"Well, Mr Fuller, it's necessary for us to take samples from you and your family so that we can rule you out as quickly as possible. It's protocol, so we can exclude you from any involvement in your son's kidnapping." She hadn't wanted to say the words out loud, and if the mother's sharp intake of breath was any indication, she knew she probably shouldn't have, but he'd asked and Calleigh had a terrible habit of refusing to lie to those who were hurting.

"I just need you to open your mouth, sweetheart." Calleigh smiled down at the little girl who'd shuffled further into her father's lap, looking up at her with wide brown eyes behind a curtain of mousy-brown bangs. The little girl did as asked, not even squirming when Calleigh ran the swab along the inside of her cheek. She just watched her, studying her face as she placed the swab back in it's box and wrote the little girl's name on the outside.

"Mr Fuller," Horatio's voice from behind her caused her to turn just as she was putting away the last of her swabs. "may I speak with you a moment?" The man stood, placing his daughter down on the couch next to his wife as he tentatively stood to follow the man. Calleigh met Horatio's eyes over the man's shoulder, immediately wondering what was going on before they once again disappeared down the hall and the two women were left alone on the couch.

"I know that it must be difficult," Calleigh started, feeling that if perhaps she could get the woman to open up to her, they could possibly work out why this had happened to them. But the woman cut her off more aggressively than she had expected and didn't even seem to care that her small daughter was sitting back in the couch, just between them.

"You couldn't possibly. How could you? Your baby is perfectly safe with you and I bet you don't even care."

Calleigh arched back a little, blinking at the sudden severity of her words and she faught the immediate urge to press her palm to her belly. "Excuse me? Mrs Fuller, I-"

"I bet this is your first, right?" She seemed to have calmed just slightly, but her tone was still accusatory. And Calleigh nodded, testing the waters. "Then you couldn't possibly understand, you couldn't possibly fathom what I'm going through. My son is missing, Miss Duquesne, he's _missing_. Someone has taken my baby boy and you have the gall to sit there and say that you understand. What?" She scoffed. "They brought you in here to soften me? Bring in the pregnant cop to show you're sympathetic? You have no idea what I'm going through!"

"No," Calleigh choked and the woman stared at her, breathing heavily. "I don't know what it's like to know my baby's out there in the world all alone. But you know what, I know that you're completely aware of what I'm going through. You've had two children Mrs Fuller and you know very well, what I'm feeling. I may not understand what it feels like for your child to go missing, but you know I understand how it feels to love them so much you're willing to do anything in your power to get them back." Calleigh reached over, taking the other woman's hand into hers as tears burst from her eyes. Calleigh's own eyes started to glisten as she reached her other hand over, using both to ground the other woman. "You know that I understand _that_, if nothing else."

She wasn't going to lie. She didn't know what it felt like for your baby to be torn away from you and she hoped against hope that she'd never have to know. But she had seen greiving mothers who'd never seen their children return. She'd held their hands and let them cry and she'd been there, when Horatio placed a rose on a tiny coffin, she'd held a stranger's hand as he buried his neice and she remembered the day so many years ago when she'd stood by Eric's side in a crowd where she was so different and they tossed white flowers into the water for the memory of one forgotten little girl.

"I do understand that." She reiterated, not even caring for the sound of tears on her voice as the woman finally, reluctantly, looked up into her eyes.

Mrs Fuller studied her intently, carefully watching her eyes that didn't sway from her, studying the way she kept her lips firm and still and noticed how her blouse seemed to draw attention to her pregnancy, as opposed to covering it up. She had passion in her eyes and while Angela was grateful that that passion was being used in the pursuit of her son, her baby, she knew that at heart, it was meant for the small child growing in the young officer's belly."You do, don't you?" She asked, as if the revelation was all of a sudden and Calleigh let out a deep breath.

"They didn't call me here to soften you, Mrs Fuller," She tried to smile, doing everything she could to reassure Angela even though she knew that now was not a time for smiling. "Lieutenant Caine asked me to come here because, like him, I want nothing more than to find your son."

Angela smiled around her tears. It was a thankful smile, completely lacking joy and Calleigh understood that. It was a silent show of appreciation for having the hands to hold of someone that felt as deeply as she did, for the life of her son. And suddenly, she was grateful that Calleigh was there, gripping her hands tighter as though she'd just been thrown a lifeline and she flinched when the shrill sound of the phone reached their ears. Calleigh edged closer to her, not even requesting that she let go of her hands as Horatio and Mr Fuller returned.

"Now, sir, we're going to be monitoring the call." Horatio spoke and while he was speaking to Mr Fuller, everyone listened. "I want you to stay calm and answer all of their questions. I just want you to try and stay on the line long enough for us to trace the call's origin." Horatio inclined his head and Mr Fuller slowly picked up the reciever, moving it to his ear.

Calleigh and Angela shared a glance as they listened closely to the call and Calleigh turned to look up at Ryan as she felt his presence beside her. When the call ended abruptly, the room was in a frenzy as the techs attempted to decipher the information they'd managed to get from the muffled call requesting One Hundred Thousand dollars from the Fullers in exchange for the four year old.

"Calleigh, I need you to come and look at something." Ryan requested quietly and Calleigh cooed gently when Mrse Fuller gripped her hands desperately.

"I'll just be a moment," She smiled, patting the woman's hand and was grateful when Ryan helped her to her feet and Mr Fuller immediately wrapped his arms around his wife, taking Calleigh's place.

"What is it you found, Ryan?" She asked, following him into what appeared to be the boy's room. It was then that she noticed the small evidence markers were showing a trail of blood-drops that lead into the room and with a hand at her lower back, Ryan ushered her over to the back corner of the room, past the toys that were still in disarray and over to where a small chunk of plaster had been gouged out of the wall.

"That's a bullet hole, right?" He questioned and she nodded, giving him a look.

"You're expecting me to collect that?" She asked, incredulously and he blinked at her, completely oblivious.

"You're the ballisitcs expert, you always get angry with me when I collect ballistics evidence wrong."

Calleigh stared at him. "Ryan," She set her hands on her hips, subtly holding her jacket back behind her wrists. "how am I supposed to get down there?" The hole was barely three inches from the base-board.

He blinked again.

"I can't even pick up my car-keys when I drop them." She rolled her eyes and finally, after glancing down at her belly, Ryan's brilliant yet slow brain, clicked in.

"Oh, sorry," He laughed at himself and Calleigh rolled her eyes again, rather thankful for the way his oblivious moments never failed to lighten her mood. And her mood certainly needed lightening, because she hadn't expected her day to have turned out quite like this. She'd been looking forward to a day off, spending a few hours with Eric on the boat and then going home to relax on the sofa with a movie and a pair of strong, warm arms wrapped around her. She hadn't expected the emotional upheval of a mother desraught and the feeling of her hormones about ready to rip her apart at any moment. She was so choked up, she could have burst into tears right then and there and not have felt any better for it. So she kept her emotions in check, desperately clinging to the rigidly detached Calleigh she'd managed to be before she was pregnant. That strong, professional woman whose heart only ever broke on the inside, not out on her sleeve where everyone could see that every single case touched her on a deeper level than she let on.

* * *

"Is that Ryan's bullet?" Natalia's voice drew her attention and Calleigh looked up from her scope with a smirk.

"I watched him collect it and would have done it myself were it not embedded in the wall so close to the ground," She quipped, holding the subject of discussion up between a pair of small tongs. "_my_ bullet."

Natalia chuckled and rounded the table. "Fair enough, so," She smirked. "have you gotten anything off of it?"

"Unfortunately," Calleigh grumbled, setting it back in her scope and inspecting it again. "the striations don't match any outstanding cases and without a weapon, I can't match it."

"Damn. Anyway, so I heard Horatio pulled you away from a pretty nice day on the water."

Calleigh rolled her eyes. "Yeah, but you know what, I'm really not upset. I mean, it would have been nice to spend the day out there but I'm much more useful here, you know? Eric works fine without me and I'd just get in the way, considering the number one boating rule he seems to be fixated on at the moment is, Calleigh goes nowhere on the boat without an armed escort." She chuckled and Natalia laughed heartily.

"Oh, well, at least you know he cares."

Calleigh's expression mellowed and she smiled sweetly, lowering her voice. "Yeah, he really does."

"We're going to find this kid, you know that, right?" Natalia questioned, catching a glimpse of something in Calleigh's eyes that troubled her just a little. It was an expression that came over her face more often these days, when a case involved children or anything too distinctly horrific. Calleigh wasn't one to normally be shaken and after everything she'd been through - and Natalia had an intimate understanding of spending afternoons trying to soothe her in the ladies room the day after a round of Chemo - she was still so tough. But since the baby and the idea that one day soon, there was going to be a little child completely dependant on her, Calleigh's whole demeaner seemed to have changed in the most subtle ways. She stared longer at victims and breathed deeper in the locker room when she'd disappear in there to gather her thoughts. She just seemed so much more affected than she ever had before and Natalia wasn't quite sure yet if that was a good thing, or bad.

"Yeah, I know." Calleigh whispered, in that resigned, matter-of-fact tone. Because in her mind, there really was no other possible outcome.

* * *

Calleigh hadn't even realised that she'd fallen asleep at her workbench when she felt the vibration of her phone at the small of her back. Sitting up quickly, she brushed her hair out of her eyes and grabbed her phone, flipping it open and not even reading who the caller was before she answered with - "Duquesne."

"_Hey, Calleigh, It's Natalia,_"

"Nat, what's up?" She questioned, fighting a yawn as she checked her watch. With wide eyes she realised that she'd slept for over two hours, hunched over her bench and immediately she wondered why no one had woken her. Natalia was speaking in her ear and she didn't voice her sudden realisation, but tried her best to tune back in to what the woman was saying.

"_We think we might have a lead on the boy, Horatio's going in now but I wanted to call and see if you wanted to be here, when they bring him out?_"

"Yeah, sure," Calleigh grabbed a pen and paper. "where is it?"

Natalia gave her the location and Calleigh jotted it down, pulling her lab-coat off quickly and tossing it over the rack as she flipped her phone shut and made her way as quickly as she could out of the room.

* * *

When she pulled up outside the old abandoned warehouse, SWAT was already making their way outside with two tall men in hand-cuffs and one following closely behind, wrapped in a black bag and perched on the top of a gurney. She winced at the sight, though felt as little sympathy as she could for the life lost. Men who could kidnap and terrorize a child were, in her opinion, the lowest form of creature. But it was a life wasted and that, she did feel for, on some level.

She pulled up beside Horatio's Hummer, jumping down carefully and heading straight over to the boy curled tightly in the arms of the red-haired man, sitting at the back of the Ambulance. "Hey," She said softly and Horatio looked up at her, smiling.

"Timmy, this is my friend Calleigh." Horatio pointed to her and it wasn't lost on either her or her older friend, the significance of the name on the small, dark-haired little boy with large, dark eyes and a solemn expression. She felt like she was looking into the eyes of a ghost, though she wasn't afraid. All she felt was a profound connection to the boy and a sudden adoration for him as he tucked his chubby fingers beneath his chin. "She's a police officer too." Horatio smiled down at him and Timmy held out his little hand, running his fingers along the soft fabric of her shirt, facinated by it for a moment. Though, it was when his little hand pressed to the firm round of her belly that she sucked in a breath.

"Baby in there." He said, watching his own hand and Calleigh's voice shook on a breath. She didn't quite know what to do. She wasn't sure if she should move or stop him and Horatio didn't quite seem to know either. Instead, she just stood there and let him touch her, hoping that it could somehow calm the boy's frayed nerves. And it seemed to be working, if by the way he crawled away from Horatio's arms and held his hands up for her, was any indication at all. Immediately, Calleigh allowed him into her embrace, lifting him up onto her hip and smiling at Horatio when he buried his face in her neck.

"Yeah," She breathed. "there's a baby in there."

"I think you might just be a natural," The older man quipped and where Calleigh would have normally rolled her eyes, she was still blinking in surprise that the boy had taken to her so quickly.

"I want mommy." Timmy whimpered and Calleigh gently rocked on the spot, doing her best to soothe him. She eyed Horatio and he nodded, heading back for his Hummer. He drove the three of them back to the Fuller house and though Calleigh tried to hang back and let Horatio take Timmy back to his parents, the boy refused to let go of her neck. So she was forced to carry him, still wrapped around her, back up to the front door where his mother was barely holding herself standing as tears poured down her face. She smiled broadly, handing Timmy over and when he waved, telling his mother that Calleigh was his new friend, she felt a few tears trickle down her face. She didn't want to take the credit for saving Timmy, because she knew that Horatio had most definately exhausted every resource to save the boy whilst she'd fallen asleep at her desk. But in her heart, she knew that it wasn't his rescue she was specifically being embraced for as Angela took her into her arms. It was something deeper, something unsaid and difficult to understand. Something Horatio hadn't been capable of and when she smiled and bid her farewells, walking side by side with Horatio back to the Hummer, she met his eyes and realised that he'd known it all along.

She'd given that mother something she hadn't known she was capable of. And Horatio had taught her yet another lesson she hadn't known she needed to learn.

And even with tears in her eyes and a desperate want to be home in Eric's arms as the sun went down, she was grateful.

TBC.


	26. Chapter 26

Okay, so I've got yet another jam-packed weekend. Zoo tomorrow with two of my small cousins and then on Friday I'm having the major hair re-do-over thingy (gotta get a cut and colour, there goes a few hours) and then Friday night i'm out at Strike bowling with some old work buddies, seriously miss them and then Saturday i'm going to be seeing my little brother and sister for the first time in YEARS, gosh they're getting so tall and my little sister...she looks exactly like me at that age, it's scary. THEN! Sunday is the Baptism for my little princess (neice) and I'm Godmother so i've actually got to stand up there and DO something...woe. Busy girl. Anywho, that's another bunch of days with no updating but I hope the fluff overload in this chapter can tide a few people over. Either way, I want to thank **CalleighEric** for the suggestion of Sugarland's song "Love" because the lyrics are fabulous! And even though I've used them in this chapter, I'm feeling the need to use different lyrics from that song in a later chapter, but we'll see.

I know it's a short one. Sorry about that. :)

* * *

**_Miami has the Dolphins  
The Greatest Football Team  
We take the ball from goal to goal  
Like no one's ever seen  
We're in the air, we're on the ground  
We're always in control  
And when you say Miami  
You're talking Super Bowl.  
_**~ Miami Dolphins Fight Song.

* * *

With a beer held securely in the crook of his elbow, and a bunch of popcorn in his fist, Eric made his way to the front door. He could hear his dad yelling from the couch and laughed because he could decipher exactly what was going on in the game, from his father's reaction and the fact that Ade had let a word slip out that Eric just knew he was going to regret when his _Tio_ finally realised and slapped him upside the head. Pulling open the door, he grinned as he shoved the popcorn in his mouth and greeted Duke with a wave. "Come on in," He coughed, realising that it probably wasn't the best idea to put the food in and then speak, but the damage was already done. "the game's just started and Dad's already losing it."

Duke laughed as he followed his son-in-law into the house, closing the door behind him. "Where's Calleigh?" He questioned, shaking hands with Pavel as Ade waved across the loungeroom and Ryan, sitting on the floor by the coffee table with his legs jammed under it so there was no way he'd be forced to get up and collect the beers, nodded his head in greeting.

"She didn't tell you?" Eric questioned, setting his beer down and heading into the kitchen. "She's gone shopping for maternity clothes with Mom and Charlotte." Eric noticed that the older man looked somewhat disappointed, but it didn't last long. Duke knew as well as he did that Calleigh'd rather sew her own eyelids shut than watch the game with them and they were all aware that she'd been complaining about her clothes being too tight, for weeks. Just that morning, Eric had suffered a whole twenty minutes of - "_But these jeans fit yesterday!_" - before she had finally decided on a flowy white skirt and an Orange halter-top that he kept imagining himself taking off instead of watching her put it on because his eyes had been completely fixated on how it pulled tightly across her belly. For weeks his favourite past-time was to touch that belly, to have both of his hands spread out across it, stretching his fingers out as far as he could to cover it completely as though it somehow made him feel closer to the baby. Calleigh seemed to love it too, smiling brightly each time he'd stop her in her tracks and just touch her. She could be cooking dinner or folding laundry or reading a book contentedly and he'd just swoop into her bubble and press his palms to her belly, causing her to giggle and grin and stare at him as if the stars themselves were now match for the gold of his eyes. "Did you want something to drink?" He asked Duke and the man nodded his head with a wide smile, no longer feeling disappointed that he wasn't going to see his daughter likely until the game was well over.

"Has she got any of that sweet-tea made up?" He looked hopeful and Eric grinned, dipping his head into the fridge and producing the decanter Calleigh had made up before she left.

"She knew you were coming." He smirked and poured him a glass and patted him on the shoulder as he made his way back into the loungeroom, dropping himself back into his chair and burying his hand in the large bowl of popcorn as all of the men in the room erupted in cheers as their team scored. Duke found himself happily joining the party, taking up the lounge-chair with Calleigh's tattered brown blanket hanging over the back as Ade moved down to the floor, feeling that Ryan's plan to trap himself under the coffee table in order to avoid beer duty, was the best plan of the day.

"We need nachos." Ade declared, rolling his head back on the couch and looking up at his cousin. Eric just gave him a look and took a swig of his beer, doing his best to ignore him. "Eric," He pressed and the older man laughed, rolling his eyes.

"You can have Nachos if you make them and if you clean up any evidence that you did." Eric took another swig of his beer before continuing. "Even the _idea_ of mexican food right now makes Calleigh feel sick."

"Nevermind then," Ade played with the edge of the label on his bottle. "popcorn will do. I wouldn't want Calleigh on my case."

"No," Eric delcared at the same time Duke did, causing both men to smirk. "you don't." The spoke in unison again, stared at each other and then laughed, turning back to the game suddenly when Pavel, who's attention hadn't swayed from his favourite team on the screen of Eric's plasma, jumped to his feet with a cheer, startling them back to attention.

* * *

_**When she who had no mother, suddenly has two.**_

* * *

Climbing out of the car a little awkwardly around her growing belly, because her Crossfire sat so low to the ground, Calleigh grinned as she met eyes with her mother who was leaning against her car. Carmen climbed out the passenger side, carrying both her handbag and Calleigh's as she rounded the front, smiling as she stood across from the woman who could have been Calleigh's twin, were she seventeen years younger. Calleigh's hair was still growing back and because it was only just reaching her shoulders, tickling her bare collarbone when she walked, she looked so much more like her mother than she would have been willing to admit. Her mother's botox not withstanding, though they weren't to speak of that. They were both slight and blond with green eyes and Carmen smiled her way as Calleigh introduced them.

"Carmen, this is my mother, Charlotte. Mom this is Eric's mom, Carmen. I don't know if Eric introduced you at the wedding but it was all a little crazy that day." She laughed and Carmen patted her arm gently, sensing that she was nervous and trying to reassure her that she had no reason to be. Charlotte didn't miss the gesture, but thought better of making a comment by biting down on her lip. She could see by the way that they interacted, that she had a lot to make up for in terms of being a good mother. This woman had gained her daugther's trust and while she was grateful to realise that Calleigh had that kind of support, she couldn't help but feel that this connection they seemed to have, was only going to make matters worse for her. She didn't begrudge the relationship though, because it was a far better thing that she love her mother-in-law than if the relationship was as strained as her own. That would have left Calleigh completely stranded and alone, and even though she was hard-pressed to show it, that was the last thing she would have wanted.

"It is lovely to meet you." Carmen nodded with her quiet, Cuban accent and Charlotte inclined her head. "Calleigh has told me some things about you, but I would love to get to know you better."

"Well, I think you're at a disadvantage," Charlotte laughed. "because it feels like she's told me everything about you."

It was true. Calleigh had told her mother as much as she possibly could about Carmen. How warm she was, how kind. She'd told her how she'd taken her in and accepted her as one of her own. She told her how she consistently felt loved in Carmen and Pavel's home and she felt so comfortable with them and the rest of Eric's family. Consciously, she hadn't told Carmen about the issues that they shared, she didn't tell her in any great detail, about her childhood because she knew that Carmen was already protective of her, the way one would expect a mother would be and she'd been worried that if she divulged too much of their past, she'd have a barrier up against Charlotte. But she knew that Carmen wasn't a stupid woman, she understood that Calleigh's childhood hadn't been fantastic and she understood, from what she'd seen, that at the very least her father was attempting to make amends. Now, with little to go on apart from how very much mother and daughter seemed to resemble one another, Carmen was happy to spend the day discovering new truths about the daughter-in-law she'd already come to love.

* * *

"Oh, _mija_, this is adorable." Carmen cooed, holding up a tiny pink dress with raspberry coloured tuling and a white bow around the middle. The perfect size for a baby of about four months. Calleigh's face melted into a smile, making her way across the store and reaching out to feel the fabric. It was soft and the ribbon was made of satin, making Calleigh grin but shake her head because she was finding it harder and harder to stay determined that she didn't want to know if it was a boy or a girl.

"It's so hard when the clothes are so cute." She laughed, and stretched out the dress as Charlotte joined them. "But I have to be realistic. Eric and I both decided that we want the baby in neutrals, just to start out."

"There are gorgeous sets over here," Charlotte pointed, making her way over to the racks of tiny white and cream baby onsies with matching hats and booties. "what do you think of these?" She held up a set that to Calleigh, looked like it'd barely fit a mouse, but it said newborn on the tag and she dipped her head, examining it with a smirk. It was cream and so soft between her fingers. It had a small elephant embroidered on the chest in grey and she practically gushed when she noticed the matching beret. "When you were born," She started quietly and Calleigh found herself turning to her mother suddenly, staring at the side of her face as she slowly rifled through the tiny baby clothes, doing her best not to meet Calleigh's eye. "I wanted to put you in nothing but pink. I _was_ excited," She smiled solemnly, shaking her head to clear it and taking deep breaths. "the one time your Daddy came for the ultrasound, we learnt we were having a girl and the first thing he did was go out and buy a pair of pink ballet slippers I'd seen in a store window about a month before." Charlotte chuckled nostalgically. "they didn't actually fit you until you were nearly four, but you carried them everywhere."

Calleigh smiled, having no recollection of the shoes at all. But it was nice to hear that her mother had been excited, once upon a time. Sometimes it was hard for her to imagine that there was a time when her parents had welcomed her in their lives, but she was slowly starting to realise that those times far outweighed those moments in the past when they'd lain their woes on her shoulders. Sometimes it was just so much easier to remember the dark times because good was good and it disappeared so fast when she was happy.

"When Eric was six," Carmen spoke gently, stepping up on the other side of Calleigh and taking the newborn set she'd fallen in love with, into her own hands. Calleigh knew that the gesture meant she was intending to buy it for her, but she didn't fight it, not this time. She figured that to have these two women in the same moment, was worth the doting if only to make them both equally happy. She had plenty of time to resist their generosity. "all of my girls were sharing this one, pretty little dress. It was Marisol's absolute favourite but Maria, she was a small child and she was proud that it still fit. But my Eric," She chuckled. "he had decided that if the three of them could share one dress, he had a claim to it to." Calleigh giggled with her hand in front of her mouth, having a fair idea where this story was going. "Pavel was never a strict man and he could never deny his children what they wanted. I returned home to find three crying daughters and a small boy in a pink dress, covered in mud because he had been digging for buried treasure."

Charlotte swiped at a tear that formed in her eye and Calleigh held her hand to her belly as they laughed so hard because the image of Eric in a dress, was just too hilarious. "He never told me that." Calleigh continued to giggle, feeling an ache in her side because it was just too much and Carmen smirked.

"I would imagine that he no longer remembers, but I don't believe he would have said anything if he did."

"No," Calleigh agreed. "I don't think so."

"How about some lunch?" Charlotte questioned, grinning and Calleigh nodded, patting the top of her belly.

"I think that's a good idea, if I don't eat something I think this little one is going to start pulverizing my bladder. Ooh!" She exclaimed, pressing her hand to the side of her belly as she felt a sharp jab against her ribs. Quickly, she grabbed Charlotte's hand, pulling it up to the spot where the baby's foot had hit her and she smiled, waiting for it to happen again. When it did, the surprised expression that Charlotte had on her face, from being the one Calleigh reached for to begin with, slipped away as she felt the movements of her grandbaby beneath her hand. "It still feels so strange." Calleigh smiled, watching her mother's face.

They didn't notice how intently Carmen was watching them, nor did they notice the smile that spread on her lips as Calleigh moved her mother's hand across her belly as the baby moved around and Charlotte's smile grew wider and wider, licking her bottom lip in concentration as she tried her hardest to feel every kick. Carmen slipped away quietly, she paid for the tiny suit with the matching beret and she grinned as she handed it to Calleigh when they were out of the store. Happy for the grateful smile that covered Calleigh's pretty face. Carmen felt that the three of them had broken the ice quite nicely. She found herself liking Calleigh's mother because even though Calleigh couldn't bring herself to completely admit it, Carmen could see in her eyes that her heart had forgiven her mother so much of her pain. She had an honesty about her face that appealed to her, something that she could see clearly in Calleigh's eyes and she felt excited for the hours of shopping that still lay ahead of them because for the past few months, since her hair had started to grow back and the pain from her surgery had ebbed away, she felt that Calleigh had regained so much of her former self and grown to revel in the parts of herself that she never used to feel so free in sharing. She was happier now and she glowed so much brighter and Carmen could see by the longing looks that Charlotte bestowed upon her daughter when she wasn't looking, that she was as proud of her as she, herself, felt.

"Do you have any plans for your baby shower?" Charlotte asked as they waited in line for their salads.

Calleigh shrugged. "Well, Natalia and Valera said something about wanting to throw one for me and I have strict instructions from Melissa to give her enough time to get down here."

"Well, that sounds good then."

"Yeah," Calleigh nodded. "it should be nice. I just hope they don't organise any of those silly baby games." She screwed her nose up like a child who'd just been force-fed brussel sprouts and Carmen laughed heartily.

"Then don't let my Maria help them organise." She said pointedly.

Calleigh giggled. "Duely noted."

* * *

_**"Is it the first summer storm? Is it the colours of Fall?  
Is it having so little and yet having it all?  
Is it one in a million? Is it a chance to belong?  
Is it standing right here and singing this song?"  
**_~ Love, Sugarland

* * *

"Wow, you bought a lot." Eric smirked, coming up behind Calleigh as she dumped her bags on the kitchen counter with a lound 'oomph'. He laughed, snaking his arms around her waist and pressing his hands to her belly and she leant back into him, dropping her head against his shoulder and leaning back until she could see his face.

"Well, I needed a lot." She justified and he shrugged, neither agreeing nor disagreeing as he dipped his head to press a kiss to her lips. "Did you want to see what I got?"

"As long as it's not ammo for your 9mm, you've got my full attention."

"Oh," Calleigh smirked playfully. "I knew I left something in the car." Eric laughed and hugged her tighter, feeling the baby moving against his hand like it was the most normal thing in the world. "Bring the bags in here and i'll show you," She coaxed him, slipping out of his arms and heading up the hall, towards their bedroom. It didn't really matter to him whether she'd bought out the entire store or bought one hat and when they finally made it to the bedroom, the bags of clothes she knew she'd now be able to wear at work and the tiny little baby accessories Carmen and Charlotte had stuffed in her bags when she wasn't looking, didn't matter. Eric guided her to the bed, yawning after a strenuous day of drinking beer, eating popcorn and lurching his whole body off the chair when the Dolphins either scored or nearly did, and with gentle hands he rested her down on top of the blankets. Calleigh sighed as she watched him pulling her cork wedges off her feet, smiling and adoring the way he kissed her ankle before moving to her other shoe.

With sleepy eyes she looked up at him and even though the light was still shining through the windows and dinner was a good few hours away, Calleigh could feel sleep taking over. Pavel and Carmen had left as soon as the women had returned and by the empty decanter of sweet-tea left on the kitchen counter, Calleigh knew that her father had been there and that all the evidence pointed towards the notion that he'd actually enjoyed himself. She felt Eric's fingers flutter against her side and rolled towards him, pressing her back to his chest as she closed her eyes. "Just a few minutes," She whispered, feeling her own breathing slow in time with the small brush of Eric's on the back of her neck.

"I'll be here," He whispered, kissing the back of her neck, just above the clasp of her necklace with the crescent moon pendant.

"I know." She grinned into her pillow.

"Hey, Cal," He smirked, knowing that she wasn't going to open her eyes at all. She'd been out all day with his mother and hers, likely looking through every baby store in Miami-Dade county and she'd been on her feet since early that morning. She was feeling more and more weighed down and he could see that the day had taken it's toll.

"Mmm," She answered and he knew that even though she didn't have the energy to answer, she was listening.

"Love you."

She muttered something that sounded a lot like 'I love you too.' But her words were muffled in sleep and her pillow, but the sentiment made it's mark. He kissed her again, feeling the baby pushing against his hand and with a smile, he gently caressed the spot where the tiny little fist, or foot, had struck him.

"Shh, your momma needs to rest." He whispered, grinning when the baby's shuffling stilled as though he'd actually been heard and Calleigh's hand rose up, curling her fingers through his and pulling his arm around her tighter, snuggling in for a deeper sleep than she'd intended, but he didn't mind.

TBC.


	27. Chapter 27

Wooho! I'm back. The Baptism was alright, family issues not with-standing but the only thing that matters to me was that the gorgeous girl of the moment looked stunning in her dresses. One traditional christening gown handmade by my mother and then her cherry-red party dress with the big silk bow at the back for the part afterwards, where she was passed around like a happy, smiling little parcel. She's a true princess, I love her.

**_

* * *

_**

**_Ooh, it's hard on a man  
Now his part is over  
Now starts the craft... Of the father.  
~_** _This Woman's Work_, Maxwell

* * *

Eric had never been quite sure that being married and expecting a baby could cause him to feel so completely fullfilled. For a long time, he'd dreamt of being with Calleigh, he'd even admitted it to his therapist when he'd reached the point of being unable to keep it in, but wasn't quite ready to let her know. He'd told her that he could see himself with children, but he hadn't told her back then, that in his mind those children looked like her. And she'd become the safe topic his therapist could always revert back to when talk of the pain, the loss and the fear of his own mortality scared him into silence. She could always bring him back to earth with questions about the infamous Calleigh and he'd smile secretly when he began to tell her about some rather insignificant moment he'd shared with her, when her smile or her laugh or her voice had warmed him from the inside out.

She'd expressed an interest in meeting her, saying that confronting his feelings could somehow help him regain control of his emotional wellbeing. And he had considered asking Calleigh to join him for one of his sessions. But he knew Calleigh too well and if she'd thought that there was anything wrong with him, if his request would have caused her to fear that he was going downhill, she would have gone with him and he wasn't quite sure he was ready for that.

Then Dr. Marsh's daughter was murdered and he'd caught the look Dr. Marsh had cast upon him, laced with a raw pain for the loss of her own daughter and begging him to appreciate what was standing right in front of him. He'd looked to Calleigh in that moment, knowing that by the way their eyes met, that the Doctor had worked out who she was. They hadn't spoken then, the shock was too fresh in her mind and Eric didn't even hide in thoughts of Calleigh, feeling that he didn't have a right to cower in safer thoughts because a woman he'd come to trust and respect, was hurting.

But later, when she'd composed herself and the crime-scene had been released. When she'd returned to her office and called him in regards to her missing files, she'd told him that Calleigh wasn't quite what she'd expected. He'd furrowed his brow at that, wrinkled his nose and cocked his head in confusion. He didn't understand how, when he said that Calleigh was the most beautiful woman he'd ever known, that anyone could assume she would look any different to what she did. When he thought of beauty he saw her eyes, her face and he heard her laugh before even the smallest glimpse of green meadows, spring flowers or the seven wonders of the ancient world ever crossed his mind.

Then Dr. Marsh had been killed and he'd spent hours with Calleigh, going through confidential patient notes trying to find the smallest shred of information they could use to catch her killer. And they would have failed, had some of her patients been more intelligent about what they told the police. He'd read through his entire pile of files and he knew, when the last one was closed and useless, that Calleigh had to have read his file. She had to have seen what he'd written and it had surprised him how little he feared the thought. She hadn't said anything, but the smile on her face when she'd left that afternoon and the way the sparkle in her eye had changed made him shiver and grin as his fingertips brushed the very edge of the future that had so far been, out of reach.

Almost three years later and he was proud to admit that his favourite pasttime had come to be laying on his stomach on the bed with his left arm tucked under him for support and his right arm stretched out so that he could press his broad palm to her rounded belly. He enjoyed listening to her soft breathing as she lay against the cushions with the sheets wrapped awkwardly around her legs. Sometime during the night she'd kick the sheets away, because the heat had only seemed to get worse. As the nights got hotter, he'd taken to leaving the patio doors open in the hopes of catching a breeze. But more often than not the air in the room was thick and damp and even the breeze was warm. But if she could sleep so soundly, he didn't really care for the heat too much. He'd wait patiently to feel a small foot or fist against his palm and sometimes, he'd get what he wanted not long after he climbed into the bed and that was often enough to tide him over until morning, when he'd wake before her to watch the sunlight on her face change as it shone through the window. But sometimes, he'd have to wait and he was happy, completely willing to wait all night for the tiny baby to make it's presence known.

He thought that he'd grow to regret leaving PD. He thought that eventually he'd start to miss it or that he'd start to want back in. He knew that Horatio would take him back and he supposed that in part, that was why he'd grown to appreciate what he'd received from giving up that life; knowing he could go back whenever he wanted, made him feel safe in the knowledge that as much as he did miss it, he didn't really want to go back. He kept his own hours now, he arrived home with the sound of the front door of the home in Bal Harbour he shared with his wife, creaking, and the sound of his keys hitting the ceramic bowl with a clink. She was almost thirty weeks along and sleeping more often, so he'd grin as he followed the hallway through the the livingroom to see her curled up on the sofa with a book rested on her belly and her head rolled back against the cushions. It was almost a daily ritual, she'd be sleeping and he'd carefully move the book to the table, replacing it's weight with his hand as he felt their baby kicking and moving around inside her. He'd greet them with a kiss, feeling the fabric of her shirt against his lips and most of the time, the feel of her hand at the back of his head as he lent back to meet her eyes, seeing that his presence had roused her.

He thought that he'd be nervous, watching her head off to work every morning, knowing that she was going to be working with guns and criminals all day. But he knew that his closest friends were watching over her, most likely closer than she enjoyed and that eased his apprehensions. Horatio had told him that Frank had insisted on accompanying her to every crime scene and that had made him chuckle slightly, but when he'd seen the polaroid Ryan had snapped, showing Calleigh in the gear she had to wear when processing evidence, he'd broken down into full-blown laughter at both the image, and the idea that Ryan was never, ever, going to hear the end of it.

He couldn't imagine being happier but he knew that with ten weeks to wait for the baby, being even happier was well within his grasp. He was taking less tours to have time to paint the nursery and with the popularity of his business he'd been able to hire a second diver and a second boat. He now had a headquarters down by the Marina and time out from work to paint clouds on a wall and help Calleigh off the floor when she got stuck, because painting stencils just above the base-board probably wasn't the best task to give a woman who, once she was on the ground, couldn't find her way back to her feet with any sense of her normal grace.

His favourite days were the ones she had off, when she'd turn up down at the Marina with a bag of donuts, two smoothies and a smile and she'd fill him in on everything that was going on at the lab. He'd rub her belly adoringly and his new business partner, David - who had no kids but a penchant for late night partying and surfing at the crack of dawn - would come into the office dripping wet from a dive and poke fun at Eric whilst laying compliments on Calleigh with the charm Calleigh had decided, went hand in hand with Cuban heritage. He also loved the days she'd show up on her break in her business suit, with her sunglasses on her head, the keys to her Hummer dangling in her hands and her belly poking out through the jacket that could no longer button up. Those days it was his job to provide the snacks but he didn't mind, because the slight flinch in David's shoulders when Calleigh pulled her gun and holster from her belt and set it on the counter between them to give her waist a rest, was worth it.

* * *

_**I know you've got a lot of life in you left.  
I know you've got a lot of strength left.**_

* * *

Calleigh dipped her head in thanks as Horatio pulled the chair in the interrogation out for her. The woman across from her was watching her intently, but didn't utter a word until Calleigh's intense gaze was set on her and her hands were clasped together against the cool glass tabletop. She noticed the woman's shoulder-length dark curls bounce against her shoulders as she looked up at Horatio, who had his back to the pair of them and his sunglass-covered eyes cast across out the window as he lifted his hands to his hips. "So I understand that you were present at the club the night your husband was murdered." He stated, turning slightly on the spot but not looking towards the women at the table.

"Well, yeah, but I left around eleven."

Calleigh smirked. "Well, see, that's not entirely true, is it?" She questioned, opening a file slowly and ignoring the woman's look when she flinched at a sharp but faint pain in her side. She readjusted herself in her seat, deciding that it was nothing more than a baby's heel against her ribs, setting a hand on her belly as she turned the file around and showed the woman a time-stamped surveillance photo from the club.

"So I left a little later than I remember, it doesn't mean I killed him."

"No," Horatio stated, turning. "it doesn't. But if it truly was only a 'little' later, we would understand, Miss Jenkins, but I am sure you can appreciate how an entire three hours confusion would appear somewhat suspicious."

The woman was poised to respond, likely with another asinine answer when suddenly, Calleigh gasped loudly. Immediately Horatio's glasses flew from his face, skirting across the flawless table-top to land with a shatter on the ground at the other end. Calleigh's chair was rolling backwards as both of her arms wrapped tightly around her stomach and within seconds, Horatio was on his knees in front of Calleigh with his hands on either side of her contorted face.

"Is she in labour?" Miss Jenkins questioned and whilst Horatio ignored her, Calleigh's deep, weezing breaths paused for a moment as she met Horatio's eyes.

"It's too soon, Horatio, the baby's too small." She fell forward, her head hitting his chest as she screamed in pain and within a blink, a uniformed officer was ushering Miss Jenkins out of the room and Horatio was doing his best to lift her to her feet.

"Can you walk?" He asked and as she hissed, she shook her head. "Call and ambulance!" He shouted through the open glass door as he tried to catch Calleigh when her writhing body slipped from the chair. She landed on the floor against him, her knees hitting hard on the linoleum and he did his best to hold her close, pressing his hand to hers against her side as she hissed again and pressed her eyes closed tightly.

"Horatio," She rasped and he could clearly hear tears in her voice. "I think I'm bleeding."

He didn't think she was bleeding, he knew she was. He could see the blood on the palm of his hands and as he held her close he could feel the warmth of it through the fabric of his shirt. Before he knew it they were being surrounded by paramedics and Calleigh was being lifted onto a gurney. She held on tightly to his hand, weezing and rasping as her blood covered both her hand and his, pulling him with her as they wheeled her down the hall.

"Call Eric, please." She begged and with tears in his eyes, Horatio nodded.

"You're going to be fine, sweetheart." He promised, patting her hand and she closed her eyes, weeping as they raised her into the ambulance. Horatio hesitated to follow her, but when she looked at him over the bustle of the paramedics crawling into the ambulance after her, he couldn't let her go alone. So he quickly jumped in at the last second, reclaiming her hand and reaching desperately for his phone.

* * *

Eric burst through the emergency room doors, slamming against the counter when his feet refused to hit the brakes fast enough and breathed heavily as he met the eyes of the stunned reception nurse. All he'd been able to hear through the muffled line of Horatio's phone call, was that Calleigh was being taken to Miami General. The line had crackled and he'd slammed his fist against the office wall as he'd dodged David, calling after him to close up shop before he'd jumped into Calleigh's Crossfire and screamed down the street in the direction of the hospital."My wife," He gasped. "Calleigh Delko, she was brought in about twenty minutes ago. Where is she? What's wrong?"

"Eric," Horatio's voice from behind him made him spin around and completely forgetting that he'd been asking the reception nurse, he turned his questions on Horatio.

"Where is she, H? what's going on? Is it the baby?"

"I don't know yet," Horatio placated, trying to calm his young friend by guiding him over to a chair, but Eric would have none of it. He refused to move and whilst Horatio didn't blame him in the least, the last thing he wanted was for the nurses to request that he leave. "they've taken her into surgery but I haven't heard anything."

"H, I've got to know that they're alright." He begged and his older friend nodded.

"I know that, Eric. I do."

"Mr Delko," Eric jumped, dodging Horatio quickly as the doctor noticed him. "are you Mr Delko?"

"I am, is my wife alright?"

The doctor looked down at her notes and Horatio could see by the look in Eric's eyes that he was losing his patience. But he was holding on, by a thin thread that would allow him to hear the woman out. "I'll be honest with you, Mr Delko, your wife's condition is serious. Her uterus has ruptured, causing quite a significant bleed."

"What does that mean?"

"Well," She swallowed. "after checking her history we can see that she's only recently undergone chemotherapy for stage 1 breast cancer and there is a note on her file, from Dr. Barlow that she is scheduled for a Oophorectomy in late June, early July. Is that correct?"

Eric nodded. "Yes, what has this got to do with-"

She cut him off with a frown. "Mr Delko, we've managed to stem the bleed for now, but we've run an MRI on your wife and I hate to inform you that her cancer has spread."

Eric felt like he was going to collapse right there on the spot. He could feel Horatio's hand against his arm and without even realising that he'd moved of his own accord, he found himself sitting down in a rather uncomfortable waiting-room chair. How could it have spread? He couldn't believe that this was happening. They'd had months of smiles and sunshine and for all that time, they'd believed she was cancer-free. She'd finally managed to reach the point where she wasn't afraid of him seeing her naked, even with the lights on and he'd realised how unbelievably proud of her, that he was, that she'd overcome the insurmountable. Now he was being told that there was still a battle left to fight and the utter unfairness of it all came crashing down on his shoulders.

"Her," He stammered. "her cancer has,"

"Spread. I'm sorry Mr Delko, but it appears that her cancer has, indeed, spread to her ovaries and her uterus. It was not the cause, but it definitely played it's part in the eventuation of the rupture. Her uterus was weakened and under the pressure of a thirty week fetus, it gave in."

Suddenly, Eric looked up into her eyes, not caring for the tears that were pouring from his own. "What about the baby?"

"The baby has every chance of surviving. But what we need to be concerned about right now, is your wife's health."

Eric stood, brushing Horatio's hand away. "Don't even consider telling me to choose between them."

"Mr Delko, the reality of this situation is that it could very well come down to the possibility that you won't have the luxury of a choice. Of course, we're going to do everything in our power to save them, but if we don't operate on her now, we're going to lose them both."

"Well," He swallowed, glancing away and taking a deep breath. "what do you need from me?"

"Permission," She stated, matter of factly. "to perform an emergency cesarean and complete hysterectomy."

"You'd take away her uterus? You'd take away any possible chance that she could have more children? And what about the baby? What are it's chances?"

The doctor sighed, resting a sympathetic hand on his forearm. "Mr Delko, if your wife is going to survive, she needs this surgery and even with the nature of the tear in her uterus, I would personally advise against having another baby. Her body simply, cannot support it. The baby has every chance of being fine, but I really feel that we need to do this, as quickly as possible."

Eric slumped back down into the chair, dropping his head into his hands as fresh tears burned at his eyes. He wasn't sure what he could do because either choice was going to break Calleigh's heart. He knew that the baby being born so early could have all sorts of problems, and he knew that whatever happened, they'd muddle through together. But he couldn't imagine making a decision with Calleigh's life and living to regret it. He wasn't sure he'd be able to face himself if she ever stopped looking at him as her husband and started seeing him as the man that took away her chances of having another baby. He took a deep breath, holding on to the faith that he knew Calleigh's heart better than he knew his own and without thinking again, he looked up into the eyes of the doctor and nodded.

"Alright," He whispered. "but can I see her first?"

"Of course," She breathed. "come this way. But you're going to have to make it as quick as possible, we don't have much time."

Eric nodded, following her through the doors, into the operating theatre where Calleigh was already laying on the table. She was surrounded by machines and as he listened to the faint beating of her heart monitor, studying the palor of her face, he glanced down to her belly to see a monitor strapped around her middle, measuring the baby's heartrate. He smiled, listening to the second beat in the room and he knew that whatever came of this, he loved the pair of them more passionately than he'd ever loved another person. He had no other choice than to believe that they were going to be fine.

"Cal," He whispered, running his fingers through her hair as her eyes fluttered open, looking up at him.

"Eric," She croaked, swallowing the dryness in her throat but he shushed her with a teary smile.

"Cal, you're going to be fine."

"I know," She blinked serenely and he felt his whole body shiver with fear. "Horatio promised."

"Well, since when has he ever gone back on a promise." He didn't have the heart to tell her that Horatio's promise was blind hope, not fact.

"Never," She whispered, gripping his hand as tightly as she could and he shakingly pressed a kiss to her forehead.

"Cal, look, I don't have much time but I need you to know. We're going to have this baby a lot sooner than expected," She nodded and he started to wonder, momentarily, how he could assume that she didn't know that's where all of the pain and fear was leading. "but that's not all." Her eyes opened wider and she did her best to keep them fixed on his, paying as close attention as she could manage, near delirium. "the doctor already spoke to me and she told me," He breathed in deeply, not sure entirely where he was finding the strength to tell her. "that your cancer's come back."

Calleigh sobbed. "What?"

"I know, baby, I'm so sorry."

"What are they," She stammered. "what are they going to-"

"You're going to have to have a hysterectomy." She blinked and turned her eyes away, unable to look at him as the idea set in. "Cal, if there was any other way."

"I know," She cut him off. "I know, Eric. As long as the baby is alright, I can do this."

"You're braver than me." He smiled, kissing her forehead again as he noticed the doctor enter the room, scrubbed up and ready to force him out. "I love you." He whispered and Calleigh nodded, gripping his hand tighter still and begging him with her eyes, to kiss her again. And he did, pressing his lips to hers as though it were the last time he would ever kiss her.

TBC.


	28. Chapter 28

Thank you to **HeartRevolution** for helping me search for the right song for Wyatt! *hugs*

**_

* * *

_**

_**You lived inside my world so softly,  
Protected only by the kindness of your nature.  
You are my sister,  
And I love you.  
**~ You are my Sister, _Antony and the Johnsons.

* * *

Fiddling with his phone as he stopped at a stop-light at the turn-off to the I-75, heading out of Tampa, Wyatt was desperate to get Melissa on the phone. But it was getting late and she had a performance that night. He'd wanted to call her away from it before she went out on stage, but he knew he'd run out of time. She was uncontactable and he knew that he couldn't wait around for her to be finished. He'd already called the baby-sitter, explaining the situation and she was more than accomodating in keeping the children until Melissa was on her way home. He just wished he could have found her so that he could have let the terror in his heart out, in just the smallest measure. He knew that he probably shouldn't be driving, but he'd found no one to carry that load and knew that if he'd managed to get Melissa, she'd be bawling her eyes out and absolutely no aid to him anyway, as far as staying on the road was concerned.

He just needed to get to Miami and he needed to be there as soon as possible. He explained what was going on, in a text message to his wife and even as he set the phone down on the passenger seat, he knew that that was likely the worst way he could have told her. But she needed to know that Calleigh was in trouble and he didn't want to wait around to tell her. She'd call as soon as she got the message and he hoped, that he'd be half-way through Port Charlotte by then, at the very least.

As he drove down the highway, staring blankly at the road ahead, Wyatt couldn't help but worry whether she was going to be alright. He couldn't ever imagine his little-big sister suffering, yet again, and being unable to conjure the strength to fight it. He'd seen her through her Cancer, and it had only reaffirmed that she was the strongest person he knew. But the idea that she was facing the loss of her child and her life, the former being a stronger fear to her than the latter, he couldn't even gather the strength to picture her face. He'd spoken to Eric on the phone, minutes before dashing out the door and jumping in his car, promising the man that he'd be there as fast as he could. He'd heard tears in Eric's voice over the phone and that in itself had frightened the life out of him. Because if anyone could be more stoic than Calleigh, should the situation call for it, it was Eric.

"_They've taken her into surgery, Wyatt." Eric spluttered and within seconds, Wyatt was dragging his car-keys out of his desk drawer and making his way out to the parking lot with his phone still pressed to his ear._

_"What happened?" He asked and there was silence on the line for a moment, but for Eric's deep breathing._

_"I don't know, Horatio said that she just doubled over in pain at work and the doctors said that her uterus ruptured. I've seen her, man, but I haven't heard from them since they took her in for an emergency ceasarean."_

_"When was that?" Wyatt was starting up the car and he knew that Eric would be slouched over in a chair with a hand covering his face._

_"About half an hour ago." He breathed._

_"Alright, Eric, It'll take me about four hours to get there, but I'm going to be there tonight, alright? You just make sure my sister gets through this. Can you do that?"_

_Eric paused and Wyatt could feel his heart pounding against his chest before the man answered faintly. "I don't know."_

_"She's going to be alright, Eric, we have to believe that." He insisted, taking a turn with one hand on the wheel, knowing that he shouldn't be driving with his cell-phone to his ear; but he didn't particularly care in that moment, he just wanted to make sure that along with Calleigh and the baby, Eric was going to make it through this too._

_"I want to," Eric whispered, but he still sounded as deflated and lost as he had when Wyatt had answered the phone. The man sounded completely beaten down and it broke his heart as the pair of them hung up and Wyatt tossed the phone back to the passenger seat, feeling his foot press down harder on the gas as his heartbeat quickened yet again._

He couldn't imagine that Calleigh wasn't going to get through this. But by the way Eric had sounded on the phone, the possibility was far too real for Wyatt's liking. A world without Calleigh, to him, was just unfathomable and as he thought about it, an Eric without Calleigh, was just impossible. "Come on, little one." He whispered to himself, praying internally for his sister to be there, with a smile on her face and his niece or nephew in her arms, when he arrived at the hospital. He knew that that particular scenario was wishful thinking, because he'd be lucky to find her awake. But he just wanted to get there to see that she was fine, bruised and battered, a little pale and sore, but fine.

Biting his lip, he changed to the fast lane and let out a deep breath, setting his eyes on the lights ahead of him. He tried to stop himself from thinking the worst, but that only brought him back to thinking of Calleigh in other ways. Like when they were kids he'd steal food from her dinner plate and instead of screaming like any other child would, she'd hold out her plate and ask him if he wanted some more. When they had ice-creams down at the beach, if he'd drop his - which he often managed to do - she always gave him hers and when they played soccer, she always pretended to trip in the wrong direction, so that he'd score a goal.

On a Sunday back when she was ten and he was eight, he remembered the image of her screaming out of church in the dress she used to describe as - "The most disgusting thing I've ever seen in the history of the world." - which was pink and had a lacey trim around the collar and the puffed edges of the sleeves. He remembered her dashing down the stairs because Mass came out at eleven-thirty and the first shooting class their Dad had allowed her to sign up for, because she was nearly eleven and wouldn't stop telling him so, started at twelve-noon and it was at the other end of Darnell. She'd talked about it for weeks, that she was going to learn about hunting and handling a rifle. She hadn't known that she was going to be so poorly recieved and Wyatt hadn't known that her response to that reception was going to have him respecting his big sister for many, many, years to come.

The boys in the class had laughed at her and called her names. They'd poked fun at her dress and they'd pulled on the bows on the end of her pig-tails. They'd told her that a girl couldn't use a rifle, but little did they know, telling Calleigh Duquesne - "You can't." - was the strongest incentive she needed to prove them wrong. And Wyatt had watched from the treeline, out of sight because he as too little to join the class, as his sister who was touching a rifle for the second time in her life - the first being when she'd finally broken their Dad down and convinced him to take her hunting with him, just that one time - as she'd hit two bullseyes and grinned triumphantly up at the teacher. Wyatt laughed to himself, remembering the teacher's expression and how proud he was of her in that moment. She hadn't been able to repeat the fluke shot for weeks after that, realising that it really had been a fluke, but since that day - and regardless that she was a tiny little spitfire with more bark than her bite - he'd no longer been afraid to tell other kids in the playground that his big sister was Lambchop Duquesne.

He refused to imagine living in a world where he couldn't say that every day.

* * *

_**Pray God you can cope.  
I'll stand outside,  
This woman's work,  
This woman's world.  
~ **This Woman's Work, _Maxwell

* * *

He wasn't ready yet, to look up from his palms that were pressed against his closed eyes. He'd been sitting there for nearly two hours, in the same position with his elbows on his knees but, he didn't need to look around the waiting room to know who was there. All of their feet told him clear enough, who they were, where they were and how they felt. He could hear his father's anxious pacing across the room, where the chairs stopped on either side of the doors and a small potted tree stood emaculately maintained. Duke's destinctive shuffle lead him in the opposite direction, both men crossing each other's path as they paced before the motionless doors like palace guards.

Natalia was a row behind him, three seats over and tapping the heel of her stiletto against the floor nervously. A couple of times he'd heard Ryan's whispered voice shush her and by the gentleness of his tone, Eric could imagine the calloused hand resting on her knee to still her. Alexx' feet were the calmest, walking slowly around the cluster of chairs, stopping every now and then - and it was in those moments, he could feel her eyes on him.

Charlotte was two seats down with his mother, he could smell her perfume and even though they had been in the same room for over an hour, Eric was glad she and Duke hadn't yet spoken. He wouldn't imagine they'd start any form of bickering now, when their daughter was fighting for her life three rooms over, but he was grateful nonetheless, for the near perfect silence. He didn't need to hear Horatio's feet to know where he was, he could sense his presence in the corner of the room where the light bounced awkwardly off the walls. The one moment he had looked up, when he'd seen them all come rushing into the room, he'd set eyes on Horatio's white shirt , still soiled in Calleigh's blood and he hadn't been able to look up since. Her blood had dried on the older man's hands and with each frustrated movement, Eric swore he could hear dried blood rustling within the folds of his jacket.

"Baby," Alexx started, but Eric's obvious flinch silenced her for a moment. He turned his body away from the sound of her voice, scrubbing his hands over his face before letting his elbows sag on his knees, feeling that he was running out of the energy to keep himself sitting up. "baby, she's going to be-"

He cut her off, looking up suddenly and stunning all of the faces in the room. "You don't know, Alexx." He snapped.

"I'm a Doctor, sweetie, trust me, her odds are good." She justified, but he scroffed, standing from his seat and starting to pace more anxiously than the two men he considered fathers, though neither were really his.

"Yeah," He swallowed. "so you're a Doctor. Are you in there, Alexx? Huh? Can _you_ save her? What the hell do you know?!" He boomed and out of the corner of his eye, he could see Charlotte jump and his mother's hands wrap around her's. Before him, Alexx's eyes were filled with tears but she didn't let them fall, she knew that his reasons for attacking her were not based in any true disdain. He was terrified and she didn't fault him for it, she was terrified herself, if she could admit it, but seeing him falling apart was breaking all of their hearts.

"Eric," Horatio's calm, controlled voice filled the room, covering Eric's ragged breathing with a hopefully placating tone.

"No, H," He cut him off too. "we don't know that she's going to be fine! We don't know if the baby is going to be fine, we don't know _anything_!" He grabbed the nearest object, the remote control for the silent television that had stopped working, and threw it across the room. It shattered into tiny pieces against the wall and suddenly, all of the feet stopped moving. All eyes were on him, even Frank's and he'd just walked into the room from gathering up sodas for the long wait, and he scanned the group with his own, internally wishing they would all just disappear so that he could wallow in anguish alone. "It's my wife in there, H, my kid." Eric sobbed, not even remembering when Horatio had stood and crossed the room, taking a stance right in front of him and refusing to budge.

"We know that, Eric." He said firmly. "And we're all here for them, remember?"

Eric took a few deep breaths in and out. Horatio was right, he knew. They were all there because they loved Calleigh in their own way and even though he knew that he'd give his last breath for her, something he wasn't sure the rest were passionate enough to give, he knew that they deserved to be there just as much as he did. Her parents, for all their faults, had given her life and given her the only love they knew how. It hadn't been much, but it was worthy of something and it wasn't his place to refuse them their worry. His parents had adopted her, seven years ago when he'd invited her and Speed to a family barbeque - when Speed had eaten all of his father's chilli and the demure blond had insisted on staying late to help his mother clean up while he and his father reclined on the couch watching a taped football game - so they deserved their patient wait too. Natalia, Frank, Ryan, it wasn't just professional respect they had for her, not entirely. It was something undefined and universally unspoken, but it was there and it blurred the line between work and family and Alexx, well, he knew how much Alexx loved her, because she loved him just the same and knowing how that felt, he couldn't even make himself consider, ever asking her to step away. And with thoughts of Alexx came the guilt for snapping and his anger ebbed away.

"I'm sorry, Alexx." He whispered. "I'm just really scared." He slipped back down into the nearest chair, five seats down from where he'd started because he'd paced and the spanse of his stride had cast him across the room in a single step. Alexx was on the left side now and she turned in her seat to search for his eyes.

"It's alright, honey," She smiled softly, trying to cool his fear. "I understand, we all do."

He nodded dumbly, no longer maintaining strength enough to answer back as he looked up at the ticking clock on the wall above the door. It stunned him, when as his eyes set on the clock, the doors burst open and he was unexpectedly looking upon the weary face of the woman he'd met earlier, still wearing her cap, her booties and her blue scrubs with a few faint smears of Calleigh's blood. "The good news is," She started without preamble, flawlessly continuing on in the face of a swarm of unfamiliar people surrounding her and Eric. "the cancer was contained to her ovaries and fallopian tubes, if we'd have waited any longer a hysterectomy would have had little effect but as it happens, we got it all." When Eric's eyes started to sparkle, she felt the need to clarify a few things. "She's going to need to be closely monitored and unfortunately, medication is going to be a big part of her life for the next few years, but this is good news, Mr Delko."

"And," He faltered. "the baby?"

She took a single, deep breath in and out. She looked upon the anxious faces surrounding her and whilst she wondered on the nature of how they were connected to this woman, she didn't ask any questions. Some would be family and some would not, at least that's the way it usually went and that was all she really needed to know. But, the glance around allowed her a moment of respite before her hardest task was performed.

"Unfortunately, Mr Delko, her lungs are under-developed. We knew that this was a risk at thirty weeks but I had hoped we'd have some luck."

"She," Eric breathed, a small smile gracing his features because he hadn't even considered that he was going to learn the baby's sex. He'd been too afraid and worried and nervous to even realise that he'd meet his son or daughter, that very day. "I have a daughter? A little girl?"

The Doctor smiled and the collective breath the group had all been holding, was released in a gush of relieved sighs. "Yes, Mr Delko. She is on a respirator right now and she's going to need to stay in Neonatal Intensive Care until her lungs are strong enough to breath on their own."

"But she's alive?"

The Doctor laughed happily, reaching out to touch his arm reassuringly. "That baby wasn't going anywhere without a fight. And I'm happy to say, neither was her mother." She grinned and Eric nodded proudly, feeling his mother's arms wrap around his waist before he dropped his face to her shoulder, weeping happily against her before he lifted his head back up to meet the doctor's eye.

"Can I see them?"

"Of course, but I'm afraid, only you."

He looked around at his friends and family, seeing all of their faces and smiling as they ushered him off, insisting that he feel no guilt over the fact that he was allowed through and they weren't. They all had a place in the order of things and right now, it was Eric's turn to come first.

* * *

The Doctor showed him through to the operating room. He'd been there hours before, when Calleigh was still conscious and the fear had all but taken over his entire being. He'd held her hand and he'd kissed her and that small part of his mind that always considered the worst as a real possibility, had really thought he was never going to kiss her again. But there she was, lying on the table with her blond head tilted to the side. She had tubes through her nose and a monitor on her finger. The large straps that had been around her protruding belly, were gone and in looking for them he'd felt the loss of seeing that the belly was gone too. She was almost back to her normal size, give or take the healthy weight she'd gained along with the baby and as he moved closer, seeing her silent and unmoving, he wanted to reach out and touch her pale face. Reaching his hand up, he could feel her warm breath against his palm but just as he was about to set his fingers on her brow, poised to caress her face, he noticed the tiny crib in the corner of the room, surrounded by it's own set of machines.

"Hey," He whispered, stepping up to it and looking down through the perspex cover that was protecting her from the rest of the world. "i'm your Papi."

The tiny baby flinched, but she was sleeping too and as he studied her, he realised how tiny she was. Her hand would barely encompass the tip of his finger. She was just larger than the spanse of his hand, both of Calleigh's and she was filled with more tubes than her mother. Calleigh could breathe on her own, the baby couldn't and as he noticed the small tube taped to her cheek, reaching into her nose, he felt his heart clench. Her little body was so small, he swore that the daiper they had her in was someone's hankerchief and he smiled down at her as he noticed the dark fuzz on the top of her head.

"You're beautiful." He breathed, not knowing there was a pair of dark green eyes, watching him silently from a few feet away. He had his hands pressed to the perspex panel and as she slept he found it easy just to watch her tiny chest rise and fall. She was breathing, and even though she had help to do it, he could cross that off his list of hopes and dreams and with a proud smile, start adding new and exciting things to the list that had been so very simple. Ten fingers, ten toes, hearing, sight and breath. It was all he'd really wanted and anything else was gravy. Now he felt like he had the whole dinner, just looking at her and the freedom to actually touch her, in the coming days, was going to be as delicious as a French dessert.

"It wasn't too long ago you'd have been saying that to me." A raspy voice from behind him made him startle and Eric turned, grinning as he caught her looking at him.

"I was waiting for you to wake up, so I could tell you myself." He chuckled and Calleigh pressed her eyes closed tight, smiling brightly because she found it difficult to gaze at him and smile at the same time. "You're beautiful." He smirked, resting his elbows on the side of the bed and leaning in close as her eyes fluttered open again.

"Is she okay?" Calleigh whispered and Eric grinned.

"Yeah," He ran his fingertip against the edge of her bottom lip. "she's gorgeous. She's not breathing on her own just yet, she's a little small. But she's a fighter."

"She kept me going." Calleigh admitted and Eric nodded, biting his lip.

"I was scared I was going to lose you for a minute there."

"Me too."

There was no humour in her voice and Eric knew that in the last few hours, Calleigh's mortality had really given her a beating. But they were there and they were all fine. Calleigh was tired and even though she couldn't feel any pain, she knew it was coming. The baby was breathing and content and Eric hadn't completely lost his mind. He put that down to a win and hoped that everything was only going to go up from there. There was no way he could be sure, but he was an optimistic man.

"Mrs Delko, we're going to move you to your room now. The baby is going to have to be taken down to the NIC unit for the night." Eric looked up at the Doctor, stunned for a moment before registering what she'd said and he panicked. He didn't want to be seperated from either of them, not mere moments after learning they were okay.

"Can't the baby go with her?" He questioned and the Doctor shook her head apologetically.

"I'm sorry, Mr Delko, but we don't have the facilities in the anti-natal ward to accomodate the crib in her room. And at any rate, we'd really like your wife to be resting, at least for tonight, she's been through a lot." Eric didn't understand why Calleigh wasn't arguing with the nurse, but when he looked down at her, he couldn't help but smile at the fact that she'd already drifted back off to sleep. He shrugged, because there was only so much he could do about that. And Calleigh really did need to rest.

"Can I go with the baby?"

"For some time, yes," She nodded. "but you won't be able to stay. You can return to your wife's room when the NIC unit closes, though." It was a compromise and he knew that she was making it because there was little chance he was going to give up without a fight. So he took it with a nod, feeling his tiredness catching up with him too as a group of nurses followed the doctor into the room. Three women in pink scrubs started clipping the baby's monitors to her crib and he noticed how the rest took a corner each of Calleigh's bed and started wheeling her out.

He was torn, because he didn't want to be apart from his wife but he knew that if he didn't follow the baby, he was going to regret not having something new to tell Calleigh about her by morning. So, with feet slow to catch up to his mind, he dashed out after the baby, following the nurses though the glassed in hallway that passed the waiting room and he could see all of the faces of his family, light up as they rolled the crib by.

"What is it?" Alexx's head ducked through the door quickly as they passed and Eric spun around with a huge grin.

"A girl." He stated before they were around the corner, out of sight and Alexx was bounding back into the waiting room to relay the news.

TBC.


	29. Chapter 29

Wow, a lot of Wyatt in this one. I hope you guys enjoy!! More Calleigh and the baby, coming up next. I promise, she does have a name and you'll all hear it soon enough. ;)

* * *

Wyatt stood by the doorway with nothing on his person but a rumpled business suit - he'd already discarded his tie in the car - and a set of keys dangling from his fingertips. They were both fast asleep and he wasn't sure if it would be right to wake either of them. Calleigh was surrounded by machines and Eric looked like he might as well have been. He had bags under his eyes and his head resting on his arm at the end of the bed. His feet were dragging on the floor beneath what had to be an incredibly uncomfortable chair and Calleigh had her arms prone beside her, straight and stiff because any movement to the left or right could pull some form of monitoring equipment free. And if he knew Calleigh at all, which he liked to think he did, he knew she'd be far too conscious of that possibility.

He knew he likely wasn't supposed to be there, but it'd taken him an extra hour to make it down to Miami - there was an accident just short of his turn off the I-75 - and even though he'd bashed his steering wheel, screaming and cursing the skies, regardless of the fact that the sky had nothing to do with it, he knew that he was glad he'd been careful enough to ensure he made it there in one piece. It was well after hours and whilst one nurse had given him a strange look as he'd walked past the station, he was grateful that she seemed to be rather junior and had been sitting alone. So he'd slipped his way through the halls, ducking his head into each door until he'd found Eric snoring in the chair and Calleigh with that fitful look on her face she used to get when the night was too hot and she insisted that human beings couldn't sleep in such humidity - she'd been seven, if he recalled correctly - and it still made him chuckle that 'human beings' had been the first description she'd used, as opposed to just regular 'people'.

There were a lot of hints he'd seen in the past, that pointed to the fact that she was so undeniably different. Special, was the word he most liked to use for her. But every time he'd tried to tell her, she thought he was being sarcastic and he'd always been rewarded by a slap to the arm or she'd take his girls out for ice-cream and hype them up before it was time for them to head home to bed. She was an evil aunt, that he knew for sure, but even though the girls would drive him mad on those afternoons that he swore there was more than just sugar in their ice-cream, he always found it kind of funny.

Watching them, he could see that for all appearances, Calleigh was okay. But Eric looked so horribly drained that he started to worry that something had transpired in the hours since they'd spoken, that had the man on his last tether. He didn't want to wake him, because sleep was important, especially when you were looking like hell rolled up in a blanket of crap, but he needed to know that she was alright. He needed to know details and he wanted to be sure that he could stumble into a hotel room, hopefully by the time the clock struck two in the morning, with the knowledge that everything was fine. And the baby? He needed to know what had happened.

"Eric?" He whispered and the man flinched. Calleigh did too and Wyatt immediately regretted how loud his voice had sounded. Crossing the room, he touched his hand gently to his Brother-in-law's shoulder and carefully shook him awake. He sat up quickly, blinking and staring at Calleigh and Wyatt watched him slowly realise that it wasn't her that had woken him.

"Wyatt, hey. What time is it?" He rubbed his face and Wyatt checked the clock on his phone.

"A little after twelve."

"God, I think I've strained my back." He mumbled, stretching as he stood and Wyatt found himself chuckling just a little. Obviously, if Eric could talk about something as trivial as a sore back - and when your entire family is at stake, back pain is trivial - then everything had to be okay, right?

"That'll teach you for sleeping in those chairs. So," He sobered up. "fill me in."

Eric yawned and nodded, looking down at Calleigh to make sure she was alright before leading the man out of the room. "She's alright. The surgery was long but they said they think they got all of the cancer that had spread to her ovaries. They're still going to need to run some tests and the Doctor said that she's going to be monitored for a while, but we should know in a few weeks if she's going to need to try the Chemo again."

"Was the baby affected?"

Eric met his eyes and Wyatt couldn't help but feel his cheeks warm at the sight of such pride on his face. In the few months he'd known him, Eric hadn't only become his brother-in-law, husband to his only sister, but he'd become a friend too. And to see him brimming with such happiness, it made him smile too. "Nah," Eric breathed. "but we shouldn't really be surprised, I mean, this is Calleigh's kid, afterall. If she was going, she was going kicking and screaming."

"So it's a girl?" Wyatt blinked away a tear, hoping that the slip in his masculinity hadn't been noticed. But who was he kidding, he was talking to the proud new father of a baby girl, he was the last man in the hall that needed to be worrying about his masculinity come morning when everyone was going to be fawning over her.

"Yeah, and she's gorgeous. She's absolutely tiny and she's fair, just like Calleigh but she's got this amazing, thick head of dark hair. They washed her up and, man, that hair was sticking up all over the place."

Wyatt laughed, following Eric across the hall to where there were two seats beside the closed door to a room that wasn't being used. "So, she looks like Calleigh, huh?"

"Except for the hair, I think so." Eric beamed. "but we're going to have to wait and see when she's out of the incubator. I've got to see in the morning if they'll let me take Calleigh down to see her."

"Sounds great, man. So," Wyatt stood again. "I'm not actually suppose to be in here and I'm a bit scared that the nurses are going to find me, every one I've ever met has always been a Nazi. So I'm glad that you're all okay and I'm going to go crash in a motel or something, but I'll come back to see Calleigh in the morning."

"Are you sure you don't wanna stay, Calleigh'd love to see you when she wakes up."

"Nah," Wyatt shook his head. "let her sleep as long as she can. I'll come back." Turning, he moved to head out but Eric quickly grabbed his arm.

"Alright, but don't stay in a motel. Here," He pulled his keys apart carefully and handed his front door key over. "go to the house, we're not using it tonight anyway. The spare room's all made up, but just ignore all the baby stuff stashed in there."

Wyatt laughed. "Will do, thanks." They embraced quickly and as Eric turned to head back into Calleigh's room, Wyatt was already heading down the hall.

* * *

_**Everywhere I'm looking now,  
I'm surrounded by your embrace,  
Baby I can see your halo,  
You know you're my saving grace.**  
~ Halo_, Beyonce Knowles

* * *

_Calleigh laughed as she watched Eric swinging her around in circles. He had their small daughter by the hands, spinning in circles in the center of the back yard with her little red party dress swirling around her bare feet. Their barking puppy was chasing close behind her as she spun and both Eric's face and that of their daugther, was alight with a joy that there was a time in her life she thought she'd never see again._

_The yard was filled with the smells of cake and candies, there were streamers hanging from the patio roof above her head and the amount of balloons that surrouned them, in an amazing rainbow of bright and pastel colours, made Calleigh feel like she'd wandered into a fairy land. She watched as their daughter's friends were all gathered around, laughing and cheering and hoping for their turn and she was grateful, for the happiness in her husband's deep brown eyes. "I love you." She mouthed, as he came to a panting stop and he grinned widely, from ear to ear. Her attention was snapped away though, when the feeling of a man's hand at her side, cut through her like a knife. She gasped, stepping back only to see Pavel standing there with a confused look on his face. He'd done nothing but touch her gently and she'd felt as though she'd been stuck with a shiv._

_"Pavel," She smiled, hoping that he hadn't noticed her flinch. He did, but before he could mention it - and she'd seen the intention in his kind grey eyes - she doubled over in pain. She could feel Eric run to her side, she could feel his arms around her, but her mind was gone. The harder she tried to hold on, the more she slipped away until she could no longer feel his arms wrapped tightly around her shoulders, or remember the colour of her daughter's eyes as she looked up at her mother in fear._

Calleigh jerked awake, hissing and panting as she finally felt where the pain had come from. Her entire abdomen was aflame with sharp, stabbing pains and she closed her eyes tight in an attempt to fight it. "I'm sorry, Mrs Delko, but we've had to decrease your painkillers." An unfamiliar voice filled her ears but, as pleasant as she most regularly was, Calleigh couldn't find the strength to hide her discomfort.

"I noticed." She growled through her teeth, looking up at the young woman with a condensed look of disdain on her face.

"I'm sorry," She breathed, with a pathetic expression on her face and even with as much pain as she'd suddenly found herself in, Calleigh nodded, biting her lower lip.

"It's alright, I'm sure it'll become more bearable?" She questioned.

The woman nodded. "Yes, it will."

"Well alright then," She did her best to force a smile. "I suppose I can handle that."

The nurse smiled apologetically again, dipping her head before she practically dashed out of the room. Her time alone didn't last though, as Eric ducked into the room just as the nurse was leaving. "Hey," He smiled. "you're awake." Because the pain really was starting to ease, Calleigh couldn't help but smile when she saw him. His eyes were bright even though his entire being looked tired and she grinned as he sat down on the bed beside her, pressing his palm to her cheek and leaning down to kiss her lips tenderly.

"I am." She smirked and closed her eyes contentedly, forgetting the pain for a moment as she focussed on the feeling of the tips of his fingers, caressing her face. "How is the baby?" She whispered, opening her eyes in time to see Eric's face melt into the warmest smile.

"She's breathtaking." He dipped to kiss her forehead and Calleigh felt her heart flutter.

"I want to see her." She continued to whisper, unwilling to share anything that was said between them, with anyone on the outside of the small world they created when they were so close to each other their noses could touch.

"The doctors said they'd prefer it if you didn't move. At least not yet."

Calleigh nodded, biting her lip as she slowly raised her eyes up to look at him again. He edged back a little, noticing how her eyes changed and her smile slipped away. Even the tone of her voice changed, but the volume of it didn't raise any higher than the low whisper that she uttered between them. Her words didn't lose an ounce of their forcefulness though.

"Eric," She swallowed, fighting back tears that she knew were only going to spring to her eyes anyway, no matter how hard she resisted. "i'm in pain. I can't breast feed her, I can't hold her and I've barely had a chance to touch her. Please," She whimpered. "don't tell me that I can't even see her."

Eric ran his fingers along her brow, feeling her soft hair against his fingers as he looked down into her glistening eyes. He couldn't refuse her. He didn't want her to over-exert herself, but he didn't want to and couldn't bring himself to break her heart by being the one to tell her that she couldn't go and see her own daughter. She'd given up too much to bring her into the world and she had more right than anyone, to feel her soft, milky skin beneath her fingertips. "Alright," He breathed. "I'll make it happen."

Her eyes fluttered closed and she took in a deep breath, willing the tears to subside as her lips curved into a smile. "Thank you, Eric."

"Anything for you." He whispered back, pressing another kiss to her forehead. "Both of you." And then he dashed out of the room, intent on keeping his promise.

* * *

_**"To find someone to love you for no reason,  
and to shower them with reasons,  
that is the ultimate happiness."**_  
Robert Brault.

* * *

Wyatt woke slowly; He thought he'd heard a bang, but as he sat up and looked around, remembering where he was an why, he realised that he probably hadn't heard anything at all. He was curled up on the couch with Calleigh's favourite Channelle blanket wrapped around his shoulders. Eric had said that the spare bedroom was avaliable to him and that it was habitable, but he'd stuck his head in there the night before and only laughed at the amount of baby necessities and toys that were stacked up on top of the bed, ready to be introduced into the nursery. That in itself, wasn't even completed and as he'd taken in the sight of the pretty little room, painted blue with swirls of clouds all around and an adorable trail of multi-coloured animals following each other around the edges, down near the floor, he'd grinned.

He'd never imagined his sister with a nursery in her home. Not to say that he'd never considered the idea of her with children, on the contrary he'd looked forward to it for quite some years, wondering and asking when it was ever going to happen. And now that it had, he looked on the room with a smile and decided that it was exactly how he'd have pictured her child's bedroom, had he pictured it before. There was a pile of blank pine shelves stacked at the end of the crib, ready to be painted and nailed up to the wall and on a drop-sheet by the window was a can of canary yellow paint and a small pile of paint brushes. There signs all around the room, of their intention to complete it before the baby arrived, but now that she was here, Wyatt was hard pressed to imagine when Eric was going to get the time to get it finished before she got home.

Making his way into the kitchen, he jumped when his bare foot touched down on the cold tiles and he laughed at himself, as he took the second step more cautiously. He reached up into the cupboard, moving to take a coffee mug down as he flipped the kettle on when suddenly, he heard another bang. He realised then that it wasn't a bang at all, but a single loud knock on the front door. He frowned, wondering who it could be before he remembered his haphazard parking attempt on the driveway the night before. He knew that his Escalade was likely parked at a weird angle and he'd met some of their neighbours before. They were surrounded by kind neighbours and had managed to make quite a few friends in their street, friends that were likely to worry about a strange car parked in their driveway and the fact that Eric hadn't come home during the night, especially while Calleigh was still pregnant. The young couple across the road with three young boys and a very boistrous labrador had spent hours at their house the night of one of their barbeques. Their boys had adored his girls and whilst all the adults had gotten along swimmingly, they'd happily shared several bottles of wine, a few beers and Calleigh had sat contentedly drinking her sweet tea, with a hand on her belly.

The woman just next door was as interesting as they come and Wyatt wouldn't be surprised if she was wrapping her weathered knuckles across the door in search of his sister because she had such an effection for her, especially since she'd fallen pregnant. Throughout her Chemo, Calleigh had told him that the elderly woman had brought over full dinners and treats that she'd done her very best to enjoy, even when eating was the very last thing from her mind. And since she'd told the old woman that she was expecting a baby, she'd started making up old Cuban remedies for expectant mothers and bringing them over whenever she could see Calleigh was home. He knew that she was a little batty, telling her stories about her time as a young girl in Cuba during the missile crisis, encouraging his daughters to run away with their imaginations, but Calleigh liked her and even if that was only because Calleigh was so kind hearted, he knew that Calleigh wouldn't if she wasn't harmless.

He made his way to the door, picking Calleigh's blanket back up from where he'd dropped it on the floor, tossing it over the back of the couch before making his way into the hall. He was stunned though, when he opened the door to see the back of a tousled head of brown curls; she had a large duffel bag drapped over her tiny frame and the hands of two overbearing little girls, still wearing their pajamas, in each of her own.

"Hey," He smirked and she spun around, grinning and releasing a deep breath in relief. All of a sudden, two sets of skinny little arms were wrapped around his waist and he was looking down at his girls adoringly. "and hey to you guys, too." He laughed, taking Melissa into his arms as she practically collapsed against him.

"We got the first flight we could, which was unfortunately at an ungodly hour in the morning." She smiled appreciatively as he pulled the duffel from her shoulders. "There's some clothes in there for you, and a few things for the girls. I was in a bit of a rush." She laughed, but Wyatt just kissed her, hugging her tightly and not even minding that he got a face full of wild curls.

"How'd you know where I was?"

"You weren't answering your phone, so I called Eric." She laughed, kissing his shoulder.

"I'm just glad you're here," He whispered into her neck, hugging her tightly and it was only then that he realised how strained he'd been since Eric's phone call the night before. He hadn't slept all that well and was slightly grateful that he'd chosen the couch because he wasn't fond of the prospect of completely re-making their spare bed after tossing and turning all night and throwing the sheets every which way. Melissa picked up on his tension, letting her own troubles of juggling the girls all the way down from Tampa, go, in favour of comforting her husband. He practically clung to her, burying her face in the crook of her neck before finally leaning back to meet her eyes. She saw the first signs of tears then and her heart leapt into her throat, but her fears were belayed when he smiled and took in a deep breath. "she's alright, she's good even. I just," He choked up again and Melissa nodded, knowing exactly what Wyatt's sister had always meant to him.

"And the baby?" She asked carefully, worried about the answer.

"She's good," She felt the tension in his shoulders ease as she held him. "Eric says she's beautiful, but I think he's biased." He laughed and Melissa giggled, pressing her palm to his cheek.

"He might be biased," She smirked. "but you know there's a very good chance that he's right, regardless."

"Yeah, I know."

"So," She smirked again. "how about you shower, I'll get these girls ready and we'll head over to the hospital, how does that sound?"

"Wanna shower with me?" He asked playfully and Melissa mock-glared at him as she passed by, being pulled into her Sister-in-law's home, by her daughters.

"I don't know if Eric and Calleigh would really appreciate something like that going on in their bathroom."

"They're not going to know!" He called after her, chasing her and the girls into the spare room where she planned to get them changed.

"I would know," She laughed, grabbing him by the thin metal chain around his neck and pulling him close enough to kiss her. "and who's going to get the girls ready, if I joined you?"

"I suppose you've got a point." He pouted and Melissa grinned, kissing him again.

"Come on, hurry up, I want to see your sister."

"Alright," He grumbled. "alright, i'm going. But I'll be thinking about you."

"Don't think about me too much," She laughed after him. "remember, that's Calleigh and Eric's shower, you don't know what they've done in there."

"Oh my god, you didn't just say that!" He turned around, disgusted and Melissa cracked up laughing.

"Wy, you're not going to tell me that you still believe your sister's never had sex. She's thirty-six and she's married, you idiot. Not to mention the fact that she's just had a baby."

"Yeah, but I've never had to picture it before," He smacked his temple with the heel of his palm, ineffectively trying to knock the image out of his mind and scrunching his nose up in disgust. "thanks a lot."

"Anytime." She answered cheekily and Wyatt growled at her, disappearing into the bathroom muttering something about evil, diabolical women.

"Mommy, what do Aunty Calleigh and _Tio_ Eric do in the shower?" Cora looked up at her innocently and Melissa had to try and hold back tears of laughter. Her daughters were still far too young to understand the context of their conversation, but that didn't stop them from hearing and understanding most of the words. She wanted to laugh, practically couldn't help it, but she knew that Cora's question was completely legitimate and she had to come up with something quickly as she looked between Cora and Emily, looking up at her expectantly.

"They clean themselves, baby, just like you do."

"Oh," She answered and Melissa could see from the look on her face that she was still confused about how that could be funny or how that could make Daddy look like he was about to throw up or make Mommy laugh so hard she peed. Cora never thought it was funny when she had to have a bath or brush her teeth. But maybe Aunty Calleigh and _Tio_ Eric had games that made it fun. She made a mental note to ask them when she saw them later, because she was sure her Mommy and Daddy had no idea how to make bathtime fun because they'd never succeeded before.

TBC.


	30. Chapter 30

Finally, the baby has a name! I hope you all enjoy this one! It's a part my Mind-Baby and part 'Happy Birthday' to **Heartrevolution**. I hope you all enjoy it!

**_

* * *

_**

**_I stand alone in the storm,  
Suddenly sweet words take hold,  
Hurry they say for you haven't much time,  
Open your eyes to the love around you.  
You may feel you're alone,  
But I'm here still with you,  
You can do what you dream,  
Just remember to listen to the rain.  
_**~ _Listen to the Rain, _Evanescence.

* * *

Listening to the hollow echo within the sterile hospital walls and feeling the disorientation of suddenly being upright and in motion, Calleigh's stomach was doing little flips. She could feel Eric's thumbs gently touching her shoulders as he pushed the wheelchair and she wasn't sure if he was aware of how grateful she was for the constant reassurance of his presence. He was taking it slow, guiding her through her ward to where the signs on the wall changed from Anti-natal to Pre-natal and the walls were no longer yellow, but a deep, moss green. She'd always wondered why the wards were colour-coded, but didn't particularly care in that moment, for a change.

She had her hands in her lap, twisting her fingers within her palm though doing her best to avoid removing her last remaining IV. It itched, though, and every know and then she could feel Eric's eyes on her as she scratched at the edge of the gauze taped to the back of her hand. All around her, she could hear the whispering of nurses, the rustling of garish bouquets wrapped in tissue paper and with each squeak of the wheels, the closer to the elevator they got, she could feel the bubbles in the aging, grey linoleum.

"You know, we haven't named her yet." Eric said softly and Calleigh could hear the small smile in his voice as he pushed her chair onto the elevator. She listened to the doors rumble, watching their reflection appear before them as they were closed inside and she furrowed her brow, looking at his face and hers, running her hand over the front of her white scrubs before pressing the fabric of her thin blue robe within her fingers. She could see that he was studying her expression and in truth, she was studying him too. "I know, we look terribe." He laughed, which earned him a soft smile and a sigh from Calleigh as she sunk back into the chair, wincing just a little as the stitches in her stomach pulled uncomfortably.

The smile was enough for him, to know she'd acknowledged the latter of what he'd said, but he knew to wait patiently for response to the former. And wait he did, as she stared down at her small feet, clad in blue slippers that had the hospital's crest on the toe in gold emboss. They were kind of like Hotel slippers, she thought, with a dip of her head. "I don't know," She whispered, knowing that thinking about what her slippers looked like, was just her brain's way of delaying something she both consciously and subconsciously feared. "maybe we'll know, when we see her?" She looked up at him in the reflection, catching him gazing at the top of her head and she smiled, brushing her palms along her thighs because it was only as they started to sweat, that she realised she was nervous to meet her daughter.

The first moment she'd seen her she'd been so drugged she could barely see in a straight line. She'd focused on the baby's tiny face, smiling as she heard her let out a few faint squeeks before the doctors had bundled her up in the incubator, closing her away faster than she'd had the chance to really feel her little face. But she knew, even then, that it was for the best. Her little lungs just didn't even have the strength to cry and the last thing she wanted, was to delay her chances to grow for her own selfish need to spend the rest of her life, just looking at her. And even though that moment was burned forever in her memory, Calleigh couldn't help but fear that she'd change so much in the few hours they'd been apart.

"I don't know," Eric whispered, leaning down to kiss the crown of her head. "we already had a moment, and nothing came to me. She just seems too good for everything we came up with before."

Calleigh giggled. "So she's not an Emma?"

He crinkled his nose. "No, she's definately not an Emma."

"Constance?" She perked up.

"No. And really, you want to subject our daughter to being 'C. Duquesne' just like her mother, her grand-mother and her great-grandmother?"

Calleigh frowned, conceding his point with a smirk and a cheeky raise of her brow. The doors suddenly opened and Calleigh was disappointed not to be able to see him any longer as he wheeled the chair off onto the Pediatrics floor. "But you know," Calleigh started, grinning as she felt his thumbs on her shoulders again. "She's not going to be 'Duquesne'."

"True. But with the initials 'C.D.' it still sounds like something you play music on."

Calleigh laughed openly, holding a hand to her stomach as she hissed and Eric stopped in the middle of the hall, dashing around to crouch in front of her, only to see her looking at him through the hair that had fallen in her face, smiling through the pain that was abating as quickly as it'd come. "You know," He nodded, listening and resting his hands on her knees. "my Grand-mother's name was Katherine, with a 'K'."

"Fair point." Eric laughed and reached up to press a gentle kiss to her nose before making his way back around behind her, and starting up the journey again. He was thankful that the nurses had shown him the way the night before, because he'd wanted this time alone with Calleigh to really talk and just _be_, with Calleigh. When they were in her room the nurses came in to check on her every fifteen minutes and as grateful as he was that they were taking such good care, it was driving him just a little bit insane.

"Almost ready?" Eric whispered in her ear and Calleigh bit her lip at the involuntary shiver that it elicited in her. She was in pain and exhausted and she wanted nothing more in that moment, than to meet her daughter, but with a word Eric could still make her bones turn to jelly.

"As I'll ever be." She brushed her hands along her scrubs again, looking forward to the cooling hand-sanitizer that she knew they'd give her as soon as they made their way into the NICU, so that she could ward off the nervous sweats. She watched Eric as he stopped the large, old wheelchair in front of a set of glass doors that had transparent animal stickers all over them. And she felt so small as she sat there with the chair too wide and the back too high.

"Ah, this is Eric and Calleigh Delko." Calleigh watched Eric say into the intercom and after a moment a crackly woman's voice came back to them with a sweet greeting and the sound of a loud beep, indicating that the doors had been unlocked for them. Within moments a portly nurse in a smock covered in multi-coloured cats greeted them with a smile and held the door for Eric to wheel Calleigh in. The walls inside were lined with cork boards covered in photos pinned up with different coloured thumb-tacks. Each one depicting either a smiling mother, father or family with their sleeping, screaming or feeding newborn. Calleigh liked it, for the same reason she liked to look at the photos people had on display in their homes, when she and Eric were working crime scenes alone and she could let her more quirky side show. She just liked to see, like a window into other peoples lives, that there was normalcy in the world. Even if it didn't look like it when they were dragging dead bodies out of the canals day in and day out.

"The baby's just in here," The nurse guided them through, past the babies that were free of their incubators and happily making noises in their mother's arms. Calleigh watched them, letting tears warm her eyes as she smiled and reached up to grasp Eric's hand on her shoulder. "just here." The nurse grinned, patting Calleigh's shoulder and leaning down to brush a lock of hair behind her ear, the way Carmen did just before she offered every heart-felt embrace. "Is this the first time you've seen her?" She questioned and Calleigh nodded, biting her lip because she wasn't sure that she'd be able to hold the tears back, if she spoke. "Well," The nurse leant closer, conspiratorialy. "don't tell the others, but I think i've got a favourite in this little one. You've got nothing to be nervous about."

Calleigh let out a deep breath, blinding the woman with a smile as Eric squeezed her hand. "Thank you," She whispered, barely managing anything else as the nurse gave Eric a look before leaving them alone in the room.

"Ready?" Eric asked quietly and even though she couldn't see him, Calleigh was convinced that he was looking at her and that he'd see her nod. He did, of course, and immediately pushed her chair across the room to where the plaque above the incubator read _Delko_, with little pink flowers adorning it's edges.

"I want to stand up." She choked and Eric immediately complied, moving the chair a little to the side and bracing himself in front of her to help her stand. She winced and he noticed that it was wince number three, making mental notes but he kept it to himself as he carefully helped her over. Being sure not to touch her too much, for fear of touching the wrong place and causing her more pain. He was just there to catch her, should it become too much - kind of a metaphor for their lives, really, and he found himself smiling at that thought.

"Wow," Calleigh breathed, resting her palms on the cool perspex as she looked down at the tiny baby laying just a little on her side, facing them, with cords and monitors all around her little body. She laughed tearily as she recognised the little white booties on her feet. They were far too big for her, but somewhere in the panic Eric had remembered that she'd wanted Ryan's gift to be the first shoes their child wore and she was grateful for that, she could even declare that if she hadn't been already completely and totally sold on him, she'd have fallen in love with him for it too.

"You're right," Calleigh leant closer. "she is breathtaking." The baby moved slightly and Calleigh was mesmerized, watching as her little legs twitched and her nose crinkled. Her cheeks had a touch of pink but along her arms and her belly, Calleigh could see that her skin was just naturally sunkissed enough to take on that golden glow Eric had when he was truely happy or if he'd spent too much time at the beach, and though her hair was definately dark there was a touch of a slight cinnamon in there that could lighten in time. Reaching her small hand through the whole in the crib, Calleigh shakily rested her palm against the back of the baby's head, feeling her soft hair against her fingertips and wondering if she could think of any moment in her life that could possibly measure up. She couldn't, of course, because nothing physical or emotional could ever measure up to the purely ethereal creature sleeping peacefully before them. And she knew that Eric would agree.

Calleigh groaned and bit down on her bottom lip as the strain of standing on her own started to become too much. She wanted to stay there and check every inch of the babie's body, touch each and ever finger, every toe and laugh if she found out that the arches of her feet were ticklish, but the pain in her lower back as starting to make her lean and she closed her eyes in frustration at the idea of having to return to that chair. But then suddenly, there was a presence behind her and she opened her eyes to realise that Eric was no longer standing at the foot of the crib. His chest was just behind her back and as the warmth increased, she knew that he was moving closer. She could feel his beath on the back of her head, ruffling her hair only slightly and she smiled as she felt his chest press against her.

"Lean on me." He whispered, brushing his hands down her biceps to her forearms, slipping his hands into the crib with hers and weaving his fingers with hers atop the baby's head. She opened her mouth to speak, to thank him for cradling her and to admit to him how absolutely complete she felt in that moment, but the baby opening her wide, round, green eyes and looking straight at them, saved her from saying something so completely uncharacteristic, while at the same time only validating the notion that nothing for them could be more perfect than that very moment.

"Hey," She sobbed, smiling through tears as she felt Eric's chin rest on her shoulder. "Lotti." She stated, out of the blue and Eric pressed a kiss to her neck.

"Lotti? You think?" She could hear him smirk and she nodded.

"What do you think?"

"I think it's perfect," He ran his fingers along hers, holding her and their daughter in his hands at the very same time. "your Momma's a little bit smitten, I think, Lotti." He laughed, looking down into Lotti's eyes as she stared at her parents.

"Is this the first time she's-" Calleigh stopped herself, barely able to form sentences as they watched her watching them.

"I'm pretty sure. I think she was just waiting for you. I bet you she knew that accent as soon as she heard it."

Calleigh laughed, leaning her temple against his as he brushed his thumbs over her wrists. "I love you." She whispered and he chuckled, kissing her cheek.

"Do you mean me or her?"

"Both." She smirked and Eric laughed again, moving his thumb from Calleigh's wrist to Lotti's brow. Marvelling at the way her long dark lashes blinked as though she was the first child in the world to ever blink her eyes.

* * *

**_Family faces are magic mirrors.  
Looking at people who belong to us,  
we see the past, present, and future.  
_**~Gail Lumet Buckley

* * *

As he stepped out through the double doors, Eric was loathe to destroy the moments that he stumbled upon. But, knowing as he did, that none of them would forgive him a moment outside without so much as relaying a hint towards Calleigh and Lotti's wellbeing, he had to make his presence known. Before doing so, though, he made sure to smile at each and every little moment that he could see before his eyes.

His parents, sitting with Duke, had his rapt attention and in their eyes he was pleased to see laughter and a calm that had been in none of their shoulders, the night before. Charlotte was on the other side of the room, her arm about Wyatt's waist as mother and son watched Melissa doing her very best to round up the boisterous girls who had a fondness for giggling and screaming for more of Horatio's magic tricks. It was a funny sight, he thought, and when Maria and Ana - minus their husbands and hoard of children - appeared in the doorway he felt that he was really looking upon a family. It was Calleigh's family, it was his family and Lotti had finally made it _their's_. Their marriage had planted the seed and Lotti, with her gorgeous green eyes that bore into his soul much the way her mother's did, was going to tend it as it continued to grow and grow.

It was his mother that caught his eye, she who had a sixth sense for finding him in a crowded room. And between the pair of them, she was the first to smile. She had her hands outstretched to him, sniffling back the tears of joy as she grasped his hands and held them tight within her own. "Tell me, _mijo_, what is her name?" Eric grinned widely, pressing a shaky kiss to Carmen's forehead as the rest of the family dutifully stopped what they were doing, to practically surround him.

"Lotti," He squeezed her hands, looking down at her for a moment longer before he cast his eyes across the rest of them. From Maria at his left to Emily with her arms wrapped around his leg, then back up to Horatio, standing back behind the first row of chairs; close enough to hear, but far enough away so as not to be thought to impose on a family moment. Eric wasn't sure how many times he was going to have to tell the man, on top of the million times before, that he was the closest thing to a brother he'd ever had, but he suspected it was going to take just a few more times to make it sink in. It didn't matter, he thought, resting his eyes on the man and proudly raising his chin, because he was going to include him whether he felt entitled to it or not. "her name is Lotti Amada Delko." He stated again and Eric caught the smile on Horatio's lips as he dipped his head.

"Calleigh's really tired and all she seems to want to do right now is sit there with her, so whoever goes in there can't stay too long." He eyed his mother, knowing that she would want desperately to stay with Calleigh and tend to her every need. But they needed to know that all Calleigh really wanted at the moment, was Lotti. He'd even had to practically beg her to accept visitors because as much as she wanted to see everyone, she just didn't feel she had the energy. "She's actually feeding her right now and the doctors have said that for her size, she's doing remarkably well. She shouldn't even be on the respirator for too long. But they just want to make sure everything's fine before we can take her out and actually hold her."

"Can we see her?" Pavel questioned and he turned to see both his father and Duke, looking at him expectantly.

"Well," He cleared his throat. "unfortunately the rules about the NIC-Unit are that it's just parents and grandparents allowed in. So I'm sorry guys," He looked towards his sisters, Wyatt and Melissa. "but you're going to have to wait until Calleigh's back in her room." Wyatt looked completely dejected, but he didn't protest as both Charlotte and Melissa hugged his middle, knowing instinctually, that he would need it. "but, if you want, Charlotte, Mami, you can go in and see them and then Dad and Duke can go in after. I'll wait out here because we're not allowed more than three at a time."

"That's an awful lot of rules." Wyatt grumbled and Eric could sense the frustration that was seeping out of him. He knew how he felt, because he knew that if it were his neice in there and if Maria or Ana or even Marisol had gone through what Calleigh'd just been through, he'd have rung someones neck for the chance to get in there. He had to say, the man was keeping his cool far better than he'd imagine he could, if he were really in his place.

"There are a lot of sick babies in there, Wy," Melissa said softly and they all knew that it was her place to speak, her job to soothe his frayed nerves, so they kept quiet.

"Okay," Carmen held her hand out for Charlotte and the younger mother took it gratefully, squeezing Eric's forearm as they passed.

"I'll just get the door." Eric jogged after them, pressing the intercom and announcing their names. The rest of the family watched on as a nurse came and greeted them, took the two women in and smiled brightly at Eric as he backed away.

"Eric, do you mind if Mel and I finished up the nursery?" Wyatt asked and Eric's head shot up quickly, stunned.

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, I mean, we're not really useful here if we can't see them and I can't just sit around and do nothing for Calleigh." Eric watched him for a moment, seeing in his posture that he was chewing at the bit to be helpful. Going insane from sitting still.

"Yeah, that'd actually be great."

"Great!" Wyatt clapped him on the shoulder, pulling him in for a hug as he stood up and moved to collect his girls from where they were crawling all over Horatio, trying to work out where his silver dollar had gone.

"It's pent up excitement," Melissa smirked, linking her arm with Eric's as they followed Wyatt and the girls towards the doors. "he was scared, for her, that he'd never see this day come. He's grateful to you," She patted his hand and Eric could see a seriousness in her eyes that they both knew Wyatt would have had a harder time expressing. "he doesn't know how to say it, but, he's glad she's got you. And so am I." She whispered the last of her sentance, pulling him down to press a kiss to his cheek gently. "Call us when she's back in her room, we'll bring the girls back to see her later."

"Yeah, sure," Eric watched her go with a rather stunned look on his face. "thanks."

* * *

Natalia pushed her way through the doors into the layout room, with a large evidence bag tucked under her arm. Jesse was already at the head of the table, he had his brand-new lab coat on, embroidered with his name, and she had to say that she was quite happy, to see that he was becoming such a fixture in their little ramshackle family. It was still early in the morning, technically dayshift had started but thankfully having had no crack-of-dawn call-outs that morning, the lab was fairly quiet. She wasn't even sure that she was going to see Ryan at all for another hour at least.

What did trouble her, though, was that she hadn't seen Horatio either outside, through the walls of his office or wandering the halls. That was probably the one thing, that could ever set a day at the lab, off-kilter. She couldn't remember a day in the past few years, that she hadn't seen him there before her. It made her curious, but with a list of cases the length of her arm, she did her best not to dwell on it. That was, until Jesse looked up at her with a worried expression.

"Has Horatio called you?" He asked quickly and Natalia stopped in her tracks, confused. He appeared to be working, but on closer inspection she could see that he hadn't really made headway on any of the work he'd said he was going to do that day. It was all just laying out before him, unmoving and unexplained.

"Why?"

"He called me last night and asked me to be in here early. He said that Calleigh was rushed to hospital yesterday afternoon."

Natalia's eyes opened wide and her jaw practically dropped to the floor with the evidence bag that slipped through her fingers. "What?!"

"Yeah, he said that something happened in the interrogation room and that he wasn't going to be in today."

Not only was the revelation that Horatio had actually, willingly, taken a day off, so surprising. But that it was because Calleigh, and by association, the baby, was in trouble; that made her heart beat speed up and practically burst out of her chest. She dipped to pick up her evidence bag, tossing it onto the table and silently thanking her lucky stars that it'd been a bag of clothing, as opposed to something she could have comprimised by sending it for a dive.

"Is that all he said? Did he tell you if she was alright, if the baby was okay?"

Jesse nervously shook his head. "No, I was hoping he'd called you. Last I heard from him, she was being rushed to emergency."

Quickly, Natalia flipped out her phone, not even attempting to hide how her hands were shaking, from Jesse. She dialed the familiar number, holding the phone to her ear as she tapped her fingernails on the counter. There was a faint click on the other end of the line and then the sound of his calm voice had her heartrate evening out just slightly. "Horatio," She breathed. "thank God. I just got in, what's going on with Calleigh?"

_"She's alright."_

"Really?" Natalia quivered, meeting Jesse's eyes. "Are you sure? What about the baby?"

_"Well, she decided to enter the world earlier than expected, but they're both doing well."_

Jesse watched Natalia talk on the phone for a few more seconds before she hung up and rested her palms on the counter, taking slow, deep breaths. "So they're alright?" He questioned and Natalia looked up at him with a small smile on her lips.

"Yeah, he says they're good. They had a pretty rough night, but Calleigh's okay." She nodded, swallowing as she squeezed tightly on her phone. "Oh, and he said for us to let everyone know that it was a girl, she's little, she's about three pounds and her name is Lotti Amada."

"Little and Loved?" Jesse smirked and Natalia quirked a brow.

"Of course she is."

"Yeah, I know." Jesse chuckled. "I meant her name, it means Little and Loved."

"Oh," She paused. "since when are you an expert in baby names?"

Jesse laughed quietly, averting his eyes to the table. "I dated a girl once, she had a bit of an obsession with the meaning of names. And you know, _Amada_ is actually a spanish word."

"Mhmm," She smirked. "yeah, I know what it means. I'm assuming that's why they've given her that name, considering both Eric and Calleigh are fluent."

"Really?" His eyes widened. "I would think Eric would be, but Calleigh's fluent?"

She nodded. "Yep, speaks it better than I do. I've heard them mutter in Russian before too, but that's more Eric's thing. Anyway, I should really go and tell Alexx before enough time passes for her to claim I was with-holding it from her and she has right to kill me."

Jesse laughed. "Fair enough, oh but hey," He called after her and she turned back around just before the door.

"Yeah?"

"Can I tell Wolfe?" He asked with a devious expression and Natalia had to grin at the brilliance of his evil. Sometimes she felt guilty for tormenting Ryan, but it was rare and only when the torment was tremdously cruel. This, on the other hand, was just fun and games.

"Sure, if you make sure you promise to call me if you get the chance to tell Tripp, I want to be there." She laughed and Jesse grinned, winking his eye.

"You've got yourself a deal, Boa Vista."

"I'll see you later."

TBC.


	31. Chapter 31

_**Baby mine, don't you cry.  
Baby mine, dry your eyes.  
Hold your head close to my heart, never to part.  
Baby of mine.  
**~ Baby Mine, _Disney's "Dumbo"

* * *

Duke made his way quietly into the room. He could hear a voice as he moved, whispering little things and he stopped for a moment to smile, hiding behind the vase of tulips he was carrying. He'd meant to bring something for her over a week ago, but he'd been so overwhelmed that she was fine, that the idea had completely slipped his mind. He listened closely for a moment, hoping that he wasn't intruding on anything before the sound of Calleigh's voice, singing a song he hadn't heard in such a long time made him realise what was going on behind the curtain. Swallowing the lump in his throat, he immediately knew what that meant and with taking a deep breath, he pushed past the curtain and set eyes on a scene that made him smile brightly.

Calleigh was laying back against a pile of pillows and Duke's heart melted as he recognised the tiny little bundle curled into her arms. He hadn't known that Lotti was going to finally be upstairs with Calleigh that day and while it was a pleasent surprise, he was a little nervous.

"Hi Dad," Calleigh grinned up at him, her hand still cupping the baby's head as her gentle singing came to a stop. "I didn't know you were coming."

"I thought I'd surprise you, Lambchop, but it looks like you've gone and surprised me." He motioned to the baby who's little eyes were drooping as she listened to the sound of their voices. She was wrapped in a pink blanket and on her head she wore a tiny white hat. Wisps of dark hair poked out the sides, just over her ears, but not enough to get a clear picture or even hazard a guess as to whether she was going to have curled hair or straight. Duke rounded the bed, sitting the vase down on the edge of Calleigh's very small side-table, right next to a bunch of multi-coloured Gerbera's with a card poking out that said "_From the girls at CSI, with all our Love._"

Leaning down, he pressed a kiss to Calleigh's forehead before craning his neck so that he could see Lotti's face. Calleigh looked between him and Lotti, grinning and Duke nodded his head proudly before turning their attention back to the baby as she let out a small squeek and sucked in her very full bottom lip. She opened her eyes again then, looking up at her mother, staring at them and Duke couldn't help but think that she was wondering, measuring them with her eyes. She seemed completely taken with her, turning her eyes to her's every chance she got and every word Calleigh spoke, had her blinking as if she was trying to pay closer attention. He knew that she was too young to completely understand what was going on around her, or to be able to actively identify everything that she felt, but she knew her mother, of that he was certain.

"How are you holding up, Sweetie?" He asked gently, taking the seat beside her bed and resting his hand on her forearm where Lotti's head was cradled.

"Better," She smiled wanely. "the aches and pains come and go and it is hard to hold her for too long. But I just don't want to give her up." She laughed lightly, blushing under her father's adoring gaze. "Since they brought her up last night, I just haven't been able to let go of her."

Duke smirked and squeezed her arm. "Has Eric been to see her since?"

"Yeah," She smiled. "he was here this morning. He's already trying to teach her Spanish." She laughed and Duke noticed how she winced just a little at the pull on her muscles. "It was nice, you know, just watching them. He's good with her."

"What about your brother?"

Calleigh rolled her eyes dramatically. "Oh, Dad, I had to beg Eric to tell him because I was too scared that he'd show up in the middle of the night, desperate to see her."

Duke laughed heartily. "That does sound like Wyatt."

"Yeah," She looked down at Lotti, who's large almond-shaped eyes, were wide open and watching her. "him and Mel and the kids are coming up tonight. Eric said he'd bring them by."

"Sounds good."

The room fell silent for a moment with Calleigh staring down at her baby and Duke barely able to tear his eyes away from his. He was the kind of man that would say to anyone he met, how much he loved both of his children, so completely equal. But in his heart he knew that he had a special place for Calleigh. She was his first child, his little girl. She'd deserved better than him but she'd made do with what little comforts in life he could offer. Time and time again he'd proven that his faults outweighed his virtues, but she was the one who was adamant that he was a good man. _'Daddy you work hard and you are a good man, don't ever start thinking that you're not.' _She'd said that or something like it on more occasions than he could count, and more often it was because she could see reason for him to doubt himself. He'd always wondered, if she'd felt reason enough to think she needed to convince him of his merit, then it was true that he had none. But time and time again she proved that, for some reason, he was worth her effort.

He was abundantly grateful to her for that and he knew that while he and Wyatt had faught so frivilously over the smallest things, she'd stood by both of them. She'd convinced them both, repeatedly, that they were better than all of that and he knew that the one main thought he shared with his son, was that_ she_ was the one with the heartfelt virtues. Sometimes he wished it had turned out different, but every time he looked into her kind, giving eyes, he was glad that she was all the good and enough to redeem them all. And now, looking up at her holding his Granddaughter, he felt that same rush of love and adoration he'd felt when he'd met Cora and Emily for the first time, but with Lotti came the overwhelming feeling of freedom.

She was his ticket to a better life and he wasn't going to throw away that last chance. He met Calleigh's eyes and realised that while she was smiling, her eyes were drooping and her hold on Lotti was weakening. She readjusted herself, resting Lotti's tiny body in the crook of her arm as she rolled onto her side, letting the bed carry the baby's miniscule weight. Duke watched her closely, curling her arm around the baby as she tucked her hair behind her ear and held her daughter close. She kissed her forehead and the baby squirmed, meeting her eyes again as she let her own drift closed.

"I'm just going to take a nap," She breathed out, hugging Lotti closer and Duke laughed gently.

"Take as long as you like, Lambchop, I'll watch her."

"Love you..."

That was the last of her mutterings that he heard but he smiled regardless, knowing neither if it was aimed at himself or Lotti, but he knew it didn't matter because she was at peace and he had the freedom then, to watch over her without scrutiny, without questions. He could watch both Calleigh and Lotti sleep, like he used to do when Calleigh was a baby and he didn't have to feel like he was intruding on anything at all.

* * *

_**I hope you learned a lesson  
'Bout hurting the ones you really love.  
'Cause I was a soldier for you,  
Would have done anything to prove it to you.**  
~ I'll Forgive You_, Bobby Valentino

* * *

Charlotte manouvered the halls with a small pink gift-bag dangling between her fingers. She'd already spent more than her fair share on her newest Granddaughter, but she'd also forgotten how clucky she always seemed to be when talk of baby girls filtered around and she just felt so much more at peace with showering Calleigh with gifts. She didn't see it as a way of buying her daughter back, she knew that somehow she'd raised a daughter that would never take lightly to that kind of intention, but she did see it as a way of showing Calleigh that she was more than willing to step in and finally be right there whenever she needed her. She had come to terms with the fact that it was going to take time for her to be the one that Calleigh called, when the need did arise, but she was content to let it be known that she was willing and to let Calleigh reach that point, whenever she felt she was ready.

She liked Carmen, she'd accepted that too and she'd seen several times over the last few months, how very much Carmen treated Calleigh like one of her own daughters. She thought she'd feel some sort of resentment towards that notion, but instead, she just felt an overwhelming gratitude. She knew that she and Kenwall chilled a room whenever they stepped into it together and somehow, Carmen had become that balance that was able to warm it to it's darkest corners. She wondered if that skill came from her being the Matriarch of such a large and loving family and she knew, in part, that it was. And she was so happy for Calleigh, that she'd managed to find her self at the center of something so uniquely special, something she'd never been able to give her.

Pushing the door open gently, she made her way inside, flinching when she caught the eyes of her ex-husband, looking up at her from the seat on the opposite side of the bed. She didn't know what to say, at first. She just stood there staring at him before she realised that he had Lotti cradled in his arms. "She's sleeping," He gestured with his eyes to their daughter, sleeping in the bed with the blankets pulled up to her chin. She smiled, breifly, before setting the small gift-bag on Calleigh's dining tray and, against her usual better judgement, making her way around the bed to Kenwall. He watched her all the way, she could feel it and as she grabbed a chair and pulled it up beside him, she knew that his expression just exuded confusion.

"How's Lotti?" She asked, not addressing the fact that they were sitting closer together than they had in over seven years. Not since the last time she'd impulsively taken him back and reflexively thrown him out. He didn't seem to want to dwell on it either, because he immediately looked down at the baby who seemed to want to do nothing but stare, inquisitively at each person that held her.

"She's good, healthy." He nodded, sniffing back a tear.

"That's good." They fell into silence again, Charlotte twisting the tip of her fingers in the leg of her jeans and Duke, sharing a silent yet apparently interesting conversation with Lotti.

"Where's Eric?" She asked suddenly and Duke looked up at her, quickly.

"Ah, that boy gives our whole gender a good name. He's out there working, providing for his family," He laughed and Charlotte found herself unable to keep from smiling, the way she'd always felt whenever she'd heard his laugh. Because whenever he did, he had a warmth in his grey eyes that made her feel both safe and adored. He had that look now, but she couldn't help but feel that the feelings were directed at the tiny little girl between them.

Looking into Lotti's green eyes, she couldn't help but see Calleigh's innocent, three-year-old face, staring at her through the rails in the stairway banister as her husband stormed out of their house in a drunken tirade. She felt guilt then, consuming her and prayed to herself that this little treasure was never going to see such cruelties. She had complete faith that Lotti was never going to see her parents reduced to that of herself and Duke, but she couldn't help but fear that somewhere in her life she was going to be forced into a better acquaintance with the world - as so many people unfairly are - and she knew that she didn't want that for her.

"I haven't had a drink in almost a year." Duke suddenly whispered and Charlotte looked up at him, meeting his eyes.

"I know," She answered softly. "Calleigh told me."

He continued to study her green eyes, watching her blink and stare into his with curiosity and just a little touch of suspicion. He didn't fault her for the suspicion, because he knew that he'd proven time and again that his promises were faulty. But he'd made a promise to himself, this time, and somehow it felt so very different. He'd chosen to make changes in his life, not for Charlotte or for Calleigh or for Wyatt but for three little girls that he wanted to see to their twenty-first birthdays. Three little girls that weren't to be afraid of Granddad's temper or his broken promises. He felt better about it, doing it for them who had no expectations of him. Charlotte knew so much about him, that each time she looked into his eyes, she could see just how much he'd lost in the bottom of a bottle. That had always made it hard, because he knew that every time he went back he was never going to be the same man she married and she was always going to know that.

He just hated that it had taken him so long to realise that was okay.

"We've got a lot to talk about." He smiled, turning Lotti around to face them both and smiling when her eyes grifted from him to Charlotte.

"Yeah," She agreed, nodding. "I just, I want to forgive you, Ken, but there is just so much-"

He cut her off. "You don't have to forgive me."

"I do, I have, I," She took a deep breath. "I always do. I just," She looked down at the baby, reaching over and resting her finger gently against her cheek as she spoke. "there is a lot here. It's not a matter of forgiveness anymore."

"Well, what is it?"

"It's trust, Ken." She met his eyes again. "You know how I've always felt about you," She choked and he nodded, because he did know. He'd always loved her, sometimes so much that it hurt and he knew that somewhere behind the yelling and the accusations, she'd always loved him too. "I just, I need to know that I can trust you again. I need to know that this year of sobriety isn't going to come to an end. I can't do it again, I'm too old."

Duke nodded, biting his lip and using Lotti's fussing as an excuse to avert his eyes. He was about to reply when her little face scrunched up and she let out an almighty cry. Both he and Charlotte jumped when they heard the sheets on the bed rustle and suddenly, they were face to face with their daughter, wide awake and searching the bed for Lotti. "Oh my god," She gasped, with a hand over her heart as she noticed Lotti in her Dad's arms. "I thought she'd fallen off the bed."

Duke chuckled. "I took her when you fell asleep." He said as he stood, passing the baby to Calleigh as she pressed the call button and immediately started cooing at Lotti and rocking her from side to side, soothing her. It did calm her nerves for a moment, suddenly feeling the comfort of her mother's arms, seeing her face above her. She did relax, but little sobs continued and it was only when a nurse arrived with a made-up bottle, that Lotti finally settled and the warmth of the milk made her eyes start to droop. Calleigh nodded her thanks to her father, glancing over to her Mother with a curious expression.

"Did we interupt something?" She questioned, meaning her and Lotti but Duke just shrugged his shoulders, resting his hands in his pockets and Charlotte's silence as she moved to sit at the foot of the bed and pat her daughter's foot, was lack of answer enough for her to know not to push it.

"Look, lambchop, I'm going to get going. I'll call Eric," He smirked as he kissed her nose. "I'll let him know I think she's gorgeous. And you know," He grinned. "she gives the best hugs."

Calleigh laughed, kissing Lotti's forehead and smiling down at her. "Yeah," She breathed. "she really does."

"I'll see you later. Oh and Char," He turned back around, just before walking out the door and Charlotte looked up at him. "those hugs are a good reason to trust me."

Calleigh watched her parents closely, noticing how her Dad winked his eye and how her Mom's cheeks reddened just the slightest bit. It made her think that something had happened while she was sleeping and she had the overwhelming urge to ask her mother what it was. But, upon meeting her eyes, she realised that she didn't have to.

"You guys took a step today, didn't you?" She questioned and Charlotte nodded, fingering the small gold cross around her neck.

"A small step," She agreed. "but a step, yes."

"I'm happy for you, Momma."

Charlotte smiled at her, silently thanking her daughter for the massive part she played in making that tiny step possible. If she could break down her entire relationship with Kenwall, she felt undoubtedly that that in a way, it started and ended with Calleigh, every time.

* * *

_**Children seldom misquote.  
In fact, they usually repeat word for word what you shouldn't have said.**_  
~Author Unknown

* * *

Sitting with her legs crossed on the bed, holding Emily's hands as she bounced up and down in front of her. Calleigh caught Melissa's worried eyes a few times but she'd reassured her with a look that told her Emily was doing no harm. She was just a small girl and with every few jumps, she tired, so Calleigh wasn't worried. She was laughing and singing and out of the corner of her eye Calleigh could see that Cora was finding it hard to keep her distance.

She understood how they felt. For the past two weeks she was sure that the whole family had talked about nothing but her and Lotti and how they were doing and now that they were there, in the same room with the both of them for the first time, she could see how the girls would be excited. Their parents were almost completely focused on their little cousin and Eric was sitting there in the chair beside the bed with the baby in his arms, showing her off like the proud, happy father that he was.

With a soft smile, she beckoned Cora to her, holding her hand as the little girl scrambled up onto the bed. "Oh, Cora, be careful," Melissa jumped toward her as she leant towards Calleigh but the blond smiled, patting her hand to relax her as Cora took a seat just beside her, doing her best to sit still.

"They're fine, Mel." She assured and though she knew her sister-in-law would still worry, she took Calleigh's word and turned back to Eric as he handed Lotti to her.

"Aunty Calleigh?" Cora spoke up, calling all attention to her.

"Yes, Sweetie?"

"Was Lotti in your belly before?"

Calleigh smirked and shared a glance with Wyatt before turning back to Cora. "Yes, honey, she was."

"Why did she come out?"

Calleigh giggled gently at the serious expression on her face before taking a breath with a smile. "Because she wanted to meet you."

"But she can't play, she's too little." Cora pouted and Calleigh watched as Melissa sat down on the bed with Lotti in her arms, turning so that both of her girls could see the baby's tiny face.

"No, sweetie, she can't play. Not yet." Calleigh shook her head. "But one day she'll be able to play with you."

"Will you teach us games to play with her?"

"Of course," Calleigh smiled. "I think she'll be good at games."

"Can you teach us your bathtime games?"

Calleigh blinked and looked up to Eric and Wyatt, confused. She wasn't quite sure what Cora was asking and felt a little like she'd been put on the spot as both girls stared at her expectantly. Melissa looked just as confused and she shrugged. "What bathtime games?"

"Mommy and Daddy said that you and Tio Eric know how to make bathtime fun." Calleigh was still frowning and Cora, being at that age where she felt that an adult's confusion was based purely on their inability to understand her logic, felt she needed to elaborate. "Mommy said to Daddy that you and Tio Eric play games in the shower."

Calleigh nearly choked on a breath. And from the look on all the adults faces, she could see they were just as stunned as she was. Wyatt's eyes were as wide as saucers and Melissa was doing her best to shrink away to nothing as she huddled Lotti close, whispering and cooing to her in order to appear as though she wasn't involved in the conversation at all. But Calleigh wasn't going to let them retreat, she couldn't, because she couldn't find the words to answer the little girl.

"Honey, I don't think we can play those games."

"But why?" Emily piped up and Calleigh was finding it hard not to laugh and blush profusely at the same time.

"I think that's a question for your Mom and Dad."

"Girls, maybe we should leave Aunty Calleigh alone for a little while." Wyatt suggested, completely unwilling to go into details with the girls, as to why those particular games were completely off limits to them for at least the next thirty years if he had anything to say about it.

"No!" They squealed in unison, causing their mother to glare at them when Lotti jumped in fright.

"Girls," She warned them and they both slinked off the bed at the same time, moving to hide behind Eric and Wyatt's legs. "go with Daddy and get us some sodas, can you do that? I'm sure Aunty Calleigh would appreciate some quiet." The girls reluctantly followed their father out of the room, leaving their mother with Calleigh, Eric and Lotti. She looked up at them nervously, holding their daughter against her chest as some form of collateral as she smiled sheepishly. "I swear, I had no idea how much of that conversation they caught."

Eric laughed heartily, dropping down into the seat beside the bed and holding a hand over his stomach. "That's pretty funny though," He continued to chuckle and while Calleigh smirked, she didn't find it as hilarious as he seemed to.

"I had no idea what to say," She worried her bottom lip and Eric looked up at her, grinning. "how did you guys even get to talking about that?"

"It was just playful banter," Melissa shrugged. "I guess we just forgot that Cora's got ears that understand a lot more than she did last year."

"And you're not meant to know what to say to those kinds of question, Cal." Eric added.

"It's true," Melissa nodded. "they're those crazy kind of questions that have no appropriate answer. Lotti's going to throw them at you like crazy, I know Cora does. Just be careful," She laughed. "because if you say something you shouldn't have said; three weeks later at your Mother's birthday party, when the room is crowded and everyone stops to listen to your husband's toast, she'll bring it back to haunt you, word for word."

Calleigh did laugh then, imagining Cora embarrassing her mother like that and hoping that Lotti was never going to do it to her. She knew, that at some point in time, her little girl was going to catch her in every kind of inconsistancy that she could, but she hoped it wouldn't amount to much and better yet, wouldn't happen in public. The most she could do was pray and even though she wasn't one to pray, she decided that she might just make an exception on that one.

TBC


	32. Chapter 32

Nothing but Eric and Calleigh. I thought that would make a few people happy considering I've taken a bit of a while to write this one. Thanks for your patience guys, because I don't know how happy you'll be to know that this story, that I've dedicated the last few months to, has almost reached it's end. It's been a fabulous ride though! And I'm not done just yet.

**_

* * *

_**_**It's written on our palms and  
It's written on our hearts  
It's written in our songs and  
It's written in the stars.**  
~ These are the Days_, Sugarland

* * *

The room was warm with the heavy drapes pulled over the windows and the only light being the soft glow of the main bathroom, shining through the hallway and casting soft lines across the nursery, the livingroom and creeping through the crack in the door into the master bedroom. The sound of crickets could be heard outside and if she paid close enough attention to the near silence, the sound of Eric's heavy breathing was keeping the beat of her heart in check. She'd heard him arrive home; it was already dark and Lotti had long ago been put down to sleep. She'd listened to his feet make a stop by their baby's bedroom and with a smile, she'd heard the faint creek of her daughter's bedroom door closing once again before his footsteps continued on. She'd felt the light on her face as he'd entered the room, but with her head on the pillow and her eyes still closed, she'd pretended to be asleep, waiting.

She loved the sound of his presence because he moved across their shared world with the same ease in which he'd stepped into the one she'd lived alone for so very long, navigating the darkness with a masters in silent grace. His clothes rustled as he removed them and she smiled at the silence between removing them and the dull thud of his shorts and company t-shirt dropping onto the chair by her dresser. His flip-flops were kicked off just inside the threshold of the walk-in wardrobe and as she'd listened closer, she could hear his bare feet touch the tiles of the ensuite and could practically smell the freshness of his toothpaste from the bed. With a faint click the small lamp that she kept on the broad bathroom vanity turned off and suddenly his feet had been travelling closer, the sound of his steps getting louder until the bed dipped down and she was rolling - like a reflex - into warm, firm arms.

"You're awake," He'd whispered, kissing her temple and snuggling down into her side.

"Barely," She'd smiled around her lie, staring at the bare space of carpet where the crib used to stand with a longing in her eyes.

"How is she?" He questioned, moving his lazy kisses along the back of her neck and as she pressed her eyes closed tightly, she silently thanked her lucky stars that he was so wonderful. He read her so perfectly, so effortlessly that she didn't even need to feel tense for him to know that she was losing sleep over something that should have come as a relief.

"She's good," She whispered, breathing out deeply. "of course she's good." She chuckled. "She's strong and she's independant, we knew she'd be fine."

Eric nodded and she could feel the movement in the way he held her closer. "How about you?"

Calleigh sighed. "I'm fine." She lied again and whilst he knew that it was a lie, blatant and practically straight to his face, he knew that it was the kind of lie all new mother's were expected to tell. It didn't bother him at all that she'd made it more of an art than any of his sister's had; actually, it rather made him smile, because Calleigh was Calleigh and even the swiftest of life changes, couldn't change _that_. It almost made him proud, because behind her words was the message that as painful as it was, everything she did, she did for Lotti.

Calleigh didn't expect him to answer, mostly because she knew that there wasn't much he could say. Her panic and fears were irrational and they were both aware of that, they'd even addressed it when Lotti had finally reached that age where she needed to start sleeping without the sound of her parents so close by. Eric had insisted that she'd be fine and had argued that it wasn't like she was nearly twenty years old and sitting her parents down to tell them that she was moving out to join a rock band. She was moving down the hall to her own room and an assortment of toys on painted shelves that her Uncle had painstakingly put up. She was moving to what her Papi had referred to as her 'big girl bed' and when he'd first said it, Calleigh remembered looking at him with a smirk on her face that told him he was an adorable idiot, but she loved him.

She opened her mouth to speak again, to address the more important issue that they should have spoken about, but as she listened, she could hear his breathing even out and she knew, after a few moments, that he was fast asleep. She sighed, having wanted to tell him then but finding herself content to wait for morning. When his arms stayed around her but his grip on her loosened, she waited a few minutes before the deafening weight of the silence around her became too much. She'd become accustomed to seeing the tiny body of her daughter sleeping only feet away from her and while her baby girl seemed to be taking the change in her stride, it was just one thing on top of a million others and she couldn't handle it.

Slipping out of Eric's hold, she carefully pressed her small feet down onto the plush carpet and with one final glance over at her husband, she pulled her short, silk robe from the back of the chair where his day's clothes lay and drifted quietly out of the room. And that was where she found herself now. Sitting on the floor with her back against the wall, watching Lotti's little chest rise and fall as she thought back on Eric's nightly ritual.

She didn't want to be angry with him and in truth, she wasn't, but she couldn't help the small touch of frustration that emanated from her when she thought of how today of all days, he had to work late. He and David had recently joined forces with a night cruise company, performing moonlight tours of the shallower reefs and while she knew that he did it for her and for Lotti and to assure that she didn't have to rush a single thing in regards to getting back to work, she would have liked to have come home from her final doctor's appointment to see his smiling face. She would have liked the help in taking apart the bassinette and she would have appreciated the reassurance of his embrace when she rested Lotti's tiny body down in the freshly made up crib in her own room, with a colorful butterfly mobile over her head and heavy pink drapes blocking out the lights from the street.

She just hadn't quite come to terms with her day and while she didn't begrudge Eric the rest that he deserved, she was aching for a chance to express everything that she felt. She'd never been one to be comfortable with that, but since Eric and the overwhelming hormones that came with pregnancy that almost two months later, still hadn't left her completely, she was feeling so much more vulnerable these days. She decided that it meant she was losing her mind, but every time Eric found her quietly crying happy tears as she fed their daughter in the rocking chair that Alexx and her husband had given them, she knew he thought it was either the most adorable or most endearing thing he'd ever seen. Sometimes that annoyed her, the way he'd stand there, casually leaning against the doorframe with his arms crossed over his chest and sometimes she'd smile and realise that even if she prayed for it, she couldn't be more loved.

* * *

_**And for all the dreamers who have come and gone  
Who have reached for the stars, who have overcome  
You're the hope, you're the wish, you're the truth**.  
~ Happy Ending, _Sugarland

* * *

Eric woke suddenly to the feeling of a breeze across his bare back. It wasn't in the least uncomfortable, but for some reason, it just felt very wrong. He rolled onto his back, expecting to feel the resistance of his wife's body wrapped around him as he moved, but instead he continued to roll until his face was pressed into the soft pillow that rested beside his and smelt of Vanilla and Jasmine with a touch of baby powder and the fresh vapour of sanitary wipes. He'd become accustomed to those smells added to her alluring arsenal over the last couple of months and it had become a comfort to him, that constant reassurance that their daughter truely exsisted.

Normally, they slept with the patio doors open for the breeze and as he looked over, watching the sheer white curtains rustling against the window-frame and casting shadows in the moonlight on the opposite wall, he knew what was wrong. Most of the time he couldn't feel the breeze for Calleigh wrapped like a pretzel around him, her short legs curled into his and her arm tucked securely under his so that he could entwine their hands together against his chest. Her face would be buried in the back of his neck and if she moved too unexpectedly, her hair tickled the back of his ears, causing him to shiver.

But she wasn't wrapped around him and as he reached his arm across her side of the bed, he could feel that the sheets had already cooled. She hadn't been there for some time. He knew that it probably meant she was feeding Lotti, but as he listened for the faint sounds of her voice carrying a lullaby through their home, he heard nothing and wondered if she'd fallen asleep in her rocking-chair again. Slipping out of the bed, he didn't even reach for his robe because the night was warm and the air was crisp.

He padded his way out of the bedroom, doing his best to avoid the spots in the hall that creaked. He made his way into the kitchen first, just making sure that she hadn't stopped for a glass of water and when he didn't find her, he grabbed a quick refreshment for himself before setting his glass in the sink and heading back down the hall. He saw as he moved by, that she wasn't in the living-room and with a smirk, he knew that that confirmed where she had to be. He followed the hall past the bathroom, pulling the door closed just a little more because to his eyes, the light shining through was too bright.

Gently he rested his hand on the door; he looked up for a moment at the small hand-painted plaque that read "_Lotti Amada_" surrounded by pink tulips and he smiled. It was another gift from Ryan, something he'd had his Aunt hand-paint. Eric remembered him attempting to defend his cluckiness when he'd passed on the gift to him, though he'd shown no shame when he'd told Calleigh the story of the origin of his Aunt's shop over coffee and a bottle for Lotti; and that had made Eric laugh.

He pushed the door open slowly, expecting to see Calleigh slowly rocking back and forth with their baby in her arms, wrapped up in the off-white blanket his mother had knitted. But instead, he frowned because the room was still dark and Lotti was sleeping peacefully, wrapped up tightly in her blankets as she made small sounds and sucked on her bottom lip; much the way Calleigh did when she was in a deep, dream-filled sleep. Opening the door further, he moved to cross the room, intent to look down on her when a hand on his ankle stopped him suddenly. Normally, his heart would have raced and he'd have been running back for one of the many guns Calleigh had stashed in their bedroom, but her hand was small and gentle and as he stood there frozen, her thumb caressed his toes almost adoringly.

Without a word he moved inside the room and pressed his back to the wall on her other side, sliding down until he was sitting with his bicep pressed against her's with his knees pulled up to his bare chest. "Couldn't sleep?" He whispered and she smiled faintly, but didn't turn away from the baby. He knew why she was in here and if he was honest with himself, he knew that if he weren't so exhausted, he'd have had the same trepidations that she seemed to be dealing with right now. She tilted her head back, resting it against the wall before she rolled her head over her shoulder, dropping it on to his with a sigh.

"Do you think I'm being silly?" She questioned and for a moment, he considered pretending that he didn't know what she was talking about. But chances were she was more alert than he was and she could catch him in a lie with her eyes closed and her hearing impaired by a parade of patrol cars with their sirens turned right up.

"No," He smiled, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and pulling her into his side. She crossed her legs, moving her arms to rest in her lap as she let him hug her closer and they just sat there with the light from the hall casting a glow across her face and their baby girl sleeping peacefully in the crib across the room. "you're not silly, Cal. You're a good Mom, you just want to know that she's alright."

"Everytime I close my eyes, I think that she's stopped breathing or that she's rolled onto her stomach or that someone has come in here and stolen her from us, Eric."

"Hey," He hugged her tighter, kissing the top of her head as he heard a sign of tears on her voice. "she's fine, see," He pointed up at her. "she's even smiling, sorta."

"It's probably gas." She laughed and he chuckled, thankful that she still had her sense of humour even though her dreams were filled with their worst nightmare. It was normal though, this pain that she was feeling and he knew that in time, she'd be alright. It was Lotti's first night without them and he knew that it was just like so many more firsts that were to come in her life. She was going to take it with a smile and enjoy it for a chance to break away from her parents and every time she stepped out the door, he knew that he was going to be consoling Calleigh as she burst into tears over the littlest things. He could already, partly see their future. On her first day of childcare, he could picture her excitement - because her cheerful disposition was something she was going to have from her mother - as she ran to meet all of the different children in her class. When she starts school, he knew that she was going to wipe Calleigh's kisses from her cheeks and tell her Dad that she was too old for their secret handshakes. When Lotti would have her first boyfriend, Calleigh was going to cry over her baby pictures and Eric was going to be cleaning and preparing both of their service pistols; or maybe that last one was the other way around.

"You're probably right." He smirked and kissed the top of her head again as she reached up to grasp the hand he had on her shoulder.

"So, I got my results from the MRI today."

If it weren't that the room was already silent, Eric would have thought he'd gone deaf with fear. He had wondered why she'd been so quiet, so drawn on the phone earlier and in the bedroom that night. And he'd thought that it was just because of Lotti but all of a sudden, he feared that it was because she'd recieved bad news. And he wanted to slap himself for having forgotten that she'd even had the appointment even though she'd told him that morning and he now remembered kissing her and wishing her luck.

"And?" He swallowed, barely able to elaborate on the question, but he knew it got his point across. She shrugged her shoulders, dipping her head further into his chest as she turned to look back up at Lotti.

"I'm good," She whispered and he could hear the smile on her lips.

"You're good, as in?"

"Cancer free. I mean, I'll still be on the Tamoxifen for the next five years, but the Cancer is gone, Eric, they got it before it spread too far."

He couldn't quite believe it. It had been well over a year and a half now and he was still at the point where he could barely believe that someone as strong and passionate as her, had to face something as insidious as this. He remembered her eyes from that day in the locker room like it was yesterday, so lost and afraid and all he'd wanted to do was take the pain away. And she'd been afraid, he knew that wasn't his imagination. She'd been more afraid than he thought she was capable of, but she'd kept on moving. Looking at her now, he'd admit that he wasn't all that surprised. She was a woman and she was _Calleigh_, nothing she was capable of should ever really surprise him. But she constantly did and he thought that that was perhaps because he was not only just surprised, but amazed by her. He was infatuated, addicted to and in love with her. And he remembered falling to the ground with her and holding her in his arms as she'd shaken and let tears fall down her face like a flood as his heart had broken. And he felt that this moment, sitting down on the floor together, marked a sort of full circle. But he needed to see her eyes, he needed to trust that what he was hearing was real so he clambered up onto his knees in front of her, grasping her shoulders and pulling her back up into a sitting position, searching her face as she leant back into the wall again.

"It's gone, Eric. I'm," She breathed. "i'm okay."

And then he believed her. He always had but it was her eyes that told the real story. Her words told him the truth but in a round-about way but her eyes, they had never in thirteen years, lied to him. Even when her mouth had lied, her eyes had known that what they had meant more to her than any secret she thought she may have wanted to keep.

"I want to scream right now." He admitted, pressing a lingering kiss to her forehead before pulling back to study her smiling face again. Barely able to contain his jubilation.

Calleigh laughed. "If you wake her, you're feeding her." She warned and he smartly kept his voice low.

Eric wrapped his arms around her, pressing his body against hers at the base of the wall and her legs kicked out as she giggled into his shoulder. He was pressing kisses along her collar-bone, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her against him until she got the message to curl her legs around his waist. He was on his knees by then, holding her closer and feeling her narrow waist in his hands as her head dropped over his shoulder and her hair tickled his back. "We can't do this here," She gasped, flinching as he ran his broad hands over the back of her thighs, gripping hard but not painfully, just enough to make her arch into him.

"Why not?" He smiled against her skin, dipping his hand underneath her camisole and running his fingers down her spine.

"Because I don't want our daughter to ever find out that the first time we did it after she was born, was on the floor of her bedroom."

"You've got a point there." He admitted, leaning back to look down into her eyes. "But we can do this? Right? You're okay with this?" He asked and the hope in his eyes was enough to make her glad he hadn't asked any sooner.

Calleigh giggled, pressing her hands to his chest, watching her pale fingers and her nails painted red, moving against his dark muscles. "I was ready a couple of days ago," She smirked and he eyed her curiously. "but I didn't want to say anything until we had something to celebrate."

"And what would you have done if the news wasn't so good?" He asked seriously and Calleigh shrugged, doing her best to hide that that was such an emotional thought for her.

"I guess I would have had something to prove."

"And what's that?" He pulled her body against his again, shuffling closer to the wall so that she had that support against her back as he kissed her along her temple, running his fingers through her hair. She tilted her head up, resting it in his hands as she met his eyes and smiled lovingly.

"That I'm still alive."

"I love you," He breathed before using the wall to brace him as he pulled them both to their feet. They were no longer eye level and he smiled at how alright with that he had come to be. Because everything about her made him love her more. That she was short, that she was sassy, that the thick thighs she complained about in the mirror meant there was just more for him to hold. He loved that she was tiny but curvey and that her hair had finally grown back to being long - not that he didn't love it when it was short enough for him to tousle - but now, all that was broken up and secondary because he'd realised that he loved her for one more reason that outshined them all. She was alive and she was going to be alive for a very long time if he had something to say about it. He wanted her forever and he was finally starting to believe that somewhere up there, there was someone watching out for them, or more likely, for Lotti.

"I know," She smirked, pressing her stomach to his as she placed a kiss against the center of his chest, right above his heart. "come on." She curled her fingers through his, slipping out from between him and the wall and moving out the door. She froze though, when Lotti made a noise and they both stood there, their eyes wide and their hearts beating wildly in their chests as she squirmed a little and one arm came loose of her blanket. Eric opened his mouth to whisper something, but Calleigh's hand came over his mouth so fast that he almost jumped with fright as she stared down at the baby for a moment more.

Lotti eventually calmed herself, licking her little lips before she stilled again and Eric slowly started to back out of the room, pushing Calleigh out with his back as he pulled the nursery door closed.

"That was close," He whispered, pulling her hand from his mouth and Calleigh laughed, sauntering down the hall backwards towards their room.

"I suppose the mood is gone then?" She questioned, tugging on the hem of her camisole as her robe feel down to her elbows.

"Are you kidding me?" He scoffed before chasing after her and Calleigh had to consciously tell herself not to let out a loud shriek as she dashed away from him with a grin.

TBC.


	33. Chapter 33

_**Do you know what's worth fighting for?  
When it's not worth dying for?  
Does it take your breath away  
And you feel yourself suffocating?**  
~ 21 Guns_, Green Day

* * *

With a smirk on her lips and the wind whipping through her hair, Calleigh walked ahead of Walter, giggling at his bad joke about market shoppers and hot Miami wednesdays. She wasn't quite sure what he had against wednesday's in particular, but his complaining was comical nonetheless and hadn't transformed into something that was going to encourage her to pull out her gun just yet, so she was still in a good mood. They were walking along the outskirts of a street-market in Coral Gables, there were stalls lined with fruits and vegetables with a few interspersed with arts and crafts and jewellery that Calleigh had to consciously tell herself she didn't need to look at. She was working and she knew she'd only get excited and want to buy yet another necklace that Eric would tell her she didn't need.

"So how's your baby?" Walter asked, out of the blue. Calleigh turned with a smile, studying him for a moment before turning back around and watching where she was walking - because they were searching for one stall in particular, the small vegetable stall belonging to the victim's husband - Walter didn't normally indulge in personal conversation, it was normally Ryan or Natalia that felt close enough to form the questions about her daughter. But she was becoming rather fond of Walter, rather attached to him in the way one would attach to a pet they loved, but never allowed in the house. And she was one to admit that the new team had spent the better part of the last year working really hard at getting it together since Eric left. Jesse was still a hard egg though and she wasn't all too inclined to crack him any time soon, she had more pertinent things on her mind like catching serial killers and changing diapers.

"She's good," She said quietly, pride seeping out of her pores. "She um," She licked her lips, wondering just what could be said that wouldn't be considered over-sharing. "she said her first word a couple of days ago."

"Nice. Let me guess, it was Momma?" He replied, playing heed to the calm rapport she was allowing.

Calleigh chuckled. "Actually, we're not sure if it was Papi or Puppy but it's a start."

"Your husband must be feeling pretty proud of himself."

Calleigh smirked, throwing another glance over her shoulder and wondering if Walter remembered that he'd met Eric once before. "Considering that we _don't_have a dog, you have no idea." Walter laughed, patting Calleigh's shoulder as they manouvered through a tight patch in the crowd before Calleigh set her eyes on the stall they were looking for. She schooled her features, covering her bright smile as she came up to the stall and caught the salesman's eye.

"Good morning, Sir." She said politely. "I'm Officer Duquesne, this is Officer Simmons," She held up her badge gesturing to Walter and the man nodded, wiping his hands on his apron as he looked Calleigh up and down. "Are you Mr Anderson?" He nodded again nervously, his fingers twitching down by his side. She could see in his eyes, that there was a sense of foreboding coming over him and within the few seconds that she'd been looking into his eyes, she could see that there was something he knew about what she was going to tell him. By the way he was sweating and how his eyes seemed to drift between herself and Walter, she could tell that something had him unsettled but yet she didn't feel that he had anything to do with his wife's death. It was a strange feeling and not particularly one that she could say she'd had all that often before. "Mr Anderson, it's about your wife."

"Has something happened to Angie?" His eyes seemed to widen and Calleigh bit down on her lip.

"Sir, I'm afraid that there was an incident this morning, involving your wife's car." She paused and Walter jumped in, sensing that this was difficult for her.

"Someone attached an explosive device to the undercarriage; I'm so sorry, but there was nothing left."

The man dropped down to the fold-away chair behind his stall, pressing his palm to his forehead as he processed the news. "She's dead?" He rasped. And while Calleigh knew that he wasn't looking at her and couldn't see her, she nodded regardless.

"I know that this is difficult, Mr Anderson, but do you know of anyone that may have wanted to hurt your wife?"

He looked up at her with red-rimmed eyes. "No. Everyone loved her."

"Excuse me." Calleigh spun around when she felt a small hand on her elbow. "Excuse me, are you cops?"

"Yes," She nodded to the young woman moving closer as Walter stepped in between the grieving husband and her turned back. "we are, what's the problem?"

"There's a strange bag under my stall, It's not mine and it wasn't there an hour ago." Calleigh knew that they weren't going to get anything from the husband in his current state and by the looks of his business, it didn't appear that any enemy he had, would have been angered enough to kill his wife over fruits and vegetables. He would stay on their suspect list, due to the simple fact that anything was possible, but there was nothing she could do in that moment. But, she and Ryan had been sent to the seminar on suspicious packages and she knew that since September eleven, each and every one needed to be taken seriously.

"Will you show me?"

The young woman nodded and Calleigh quickly followed her, pulling Walter along behind her. They were shown to a small candy stall about three stalls away from Mr Anderson and Calleigh frowned, meeting Walter's eyes for a moment before the woman reached for the black gym bag underneath the table. Calleigh flinched, grabbing the woman's arm before she touched it. "Don't pull it out, we don't know what's inside it."

The woman stepped away and Walter crouched down beside Calleigh, slipping on his gloves as she did the same before reaching for the frayed old zipper. He pulled back the cover hesitantly, rolling it back and carefully studying the contents with narrowed eyes. "What is it?" He questioned, looking to Calleigh who was staring at it so intently, he would have sworn she was having a stroke.

"We need to get these people out of here, now." Her voice was calm and steady, but Walter could hear the panic behind it. The bag had nothing in it but two tupperware containers, one stacked on top of the other and a small ticking alarm-clock rested on top. He could almost sense what it was from Calleigh's reaction, but studying it closer and the wires connecting the clock to the lower container, had him fairly certain.

"How long do we have?"

Calleigh didn't hesitate, she leapt to her feet and screamed. "Everyone get out of here, now! There is a bomb in the market!" There was sudden panic, chairs were knocked over, the woman who had shown them the bag was long gone and Mr Anderson ran by them, pulling with him a hand-full of children with candy-floss as she met his eye. Walter still had his head in the bag, watching the numbers tick over as he slowly realised just how much time they had; none. Grabbing Calleigh around the waist, he dived as far as he could from the bag as it erupted in a massive explosion. There was a shattering sound and the wind was knocked right out of Calleigh's tiny body as Walter's bear-like frame landed on top of her, shielding her completely. She wheezed and rasped, doing her best not to flinch as he held her close, his hands holding her head to his chest as screams rang out and the sound of sirens could be heard in the distance.

"Walter," She breathed with considerable effort as a chinkling sound reached her ears, the sound of tiny chunks of metal raining down on the pavement. She could hear the large man breathing on top of her, but no matter how hard she pushed, she couldn't get him to budge. "Walter?" He groaned, unable to move far enough away to completely roll off her, but he managed far enough that she had the strength to help herself, slipping out of his hold and dragging herself up to her knees beside him. The first thing she noticed was the nails sticking out of his back, practically his entire back was covered in at least ten of them. She hadn't even noticed the one in her own thigh until she tried to move awkwardly and let out a sudden scream. Walter's eyes opened and he rolled as far as he could manage, in her direction. She hissed through pain as she met his eye, brushing her long hair out of her eyes though it did very little to improve her vision and only worsened the dull ache in her head.

"You're hurt," He coughed. "Horatio's gonna kill me." He was looking up at the blood seeping from her hairline, an injury that she couldn't see, but could definitely feel. A sliver of glass had found it's way by him and grazed through her hair, streaking her blond locks with red.

"Shh," Calleigh soothed, pressing her small hand to his back, doing her best not to touch the nails embedded in his flesh. All around them people were lying either prone or dead and further away others were scuffed and dirty from the initial blast, but none the worse for wear. The wooden frame of the stall above them was riddled with nails and bits of glass and Calleigh swallowed the lump in her throat as she realised what had happened. The bomb had been filled with shrapnel, bits and pieces of scrap and junk that was mostly nails and glass shards, and they'd acted like bullets against the initially oblivious crowd.

It felt like seconds before she was being pulled away from Walter, but he was unconcious and Horatio's arms were around her,dragging her to her feet so it had to have been longer. The wound in her leg was bleeding more profusely, because she'd been idiotic in pulling the nail free and as she stood with Horatio's arms around her shoulders, watching them wheeling Walter away, stomach down on a gurney, she felt a renewed rage for what had happened to them.

"He saved me, Horatio."

"He's going to be fine, Calleigh." He whispered, brushing her hair away from her face and attempting to hold her tighter. But she was not as compliant as he'd expected. She pushed away from him, stumbling unsteadily on her high shoes as she felt her head spin. "Calleigh," He uttered her name almost warningly, but she staggered away from him, back in the direction she and Walter had walked earlier in the morning, back to where her Hummer was parked.

"I've got to get back to the lab, I have to analyse that bomb."

"Calleigh, sweetheart, it's being taken care of." Horatio reached for her as she stumbled again, using his arm for support but stepping away when he tried to grab her hand. "You need to get to the hospital, you could have a concussion."

"I don't," She shook her head, pressing her fingers to her brow as a sharp pain shot across her eyes. "I'll be fine."

Horatio was less than convinced. She couldn't see his eyes for his sunglasses, but she knew the expression on his face because it was one of her own regulars. Deep and utter concern, mixed in with a touch of annoyance. She'd turned that expression on Eric more times than she could count, finishing it off with yelling at him for being a stubborn bastard before storming into their bedroom and slamming the door. "You need to see a doctor. At the very least your leg needs stitches." He compromised and Calleigh nodded, silently, feeling her head spinning just as much as before and knowing that it would be reckless of her to attempt to move about in that state.

"Alright." She relented, allowing him to hold her arm and guide her to his Hummer. She'd allow him to take her to the hospital and get her cleaned up, but she wasn't going to stay there any longer than she had to.

* * *

_**I'm falling even more in love with you  
Letting go of all I've held onto  
I'm standing here until you make me move  
I'm hanging by a moment here with you.**  
~ Hanging by A Moment_, Lifehouse

* * *

Leaving all of the baby paraphernalia in the car, Eric made his way up the broad front steps of the Crime Lab with Lotti on his hip. The little girl's curly blond pig-tails bounced as he took the stairs two at a time and he patted her little hand as she gripped tightly to his shirt. Grateful as he was that his business had boomed in the short year it'd been in operation, Eric wasn't so grateful that one of the days he now had free because his 'staff' had things under control, that had set aside to spend with Lotti at the park, was rudely interrupted by the sheer panic that coursed through his brain when he'd heard Calleigh had been involved in a situation that centered around a bomb and detonation. The mere idea of Calleigh going to work at all, everyday, had his nerves frayed and he knew the job inside and out. He considered that both a blessing and a curse because he knew that it was safer than some would assume and more dangerous than others would think.

Pushing the doors open quickly, he breezed his way through to reception, placing Lotti down on the counter. "Is there any word on Officer Duquesne?" He questioned and the receptionist, Bianca, looked up at him with her mouth hanging open just a little.

"Eric, I-"

He cut her off. "Is she alright? Is she hurt?"

"I, I don't know." She stammered. "Horatio called about an hour ago, he said that he was driving her to the hospital. He should be back soon, you should wait here."

Eric looked down at Lotti, holding his hands against her hips to stop her shuffling along the counter. He knew that if it was serious, Horatio would have called himself and not left it to Jesse to pass the word along. How the man had even gotten his number he wasn't sure, because he was certain Calleigh didn't just hand out their home number at work, she was far too private for that. No, Horatio had passed it down the line because Calleigh was alright and he didn't want him to panic, he was sure of that. At least, he wanted to be sure of that because any other conclusion ended with a trip to the hospital and a restless night of watching Lotti sleep curled in a ball on a hospital waiting room chair. And he'd spent far too much time in hospitals waiting for Calleigh to be alright.

"We'll sit." He said softly, lifting Lotti back into his arms and carrying her down the hall to the waiting room. He sat down, resting her on her little sandled feet and watching her waddle about the room, heading straight for the bucket of toys in the corner by the door.

"Papi!" She called excitedly, dragging a battered old glow-worm toy from the box and holding it up for him.

"That's great, _mija_." He answered her half-heartedly, not even really having the energy to care how much bacteria coated those waiting-room toys. If she put it in her mouth, he'd jump into action, but until that point, he could think of nothing but his wife. Slouching back in the chair he scrubbed his hands over his eyes before looking back to Lotti as she pattered around the room, dragging the glow-worm with her. He made a mental note to buy her one that was clean and new and _hers_, sometime in the next week and smiled when she found his knees again, resting her arms over his thighs to give her little legs a break as she showed him the worm up close as if it were the most fascinating thing in the world. She hadn't been walking on her own all that long and she still found herself desperate for breaks, although unwilling to just sit down where she stood. He attributed that trait to her mother, never able to stop and sit until she knew there was absolutely nothing else that she could do.

Eric grabbed Lotti's hands, holding her tiny ones in his own and she dropped the worm in favour of looking up at her father with her head cocked curiously to the side. "Momma?" She almost phrased it like a question and Eric's throat constricted because it was almost like she knew something wasn't right. He nodded, licking his lips as he turned her around and picked up the worm for her, attempting to give her a distraction.

"She'll be here soon, _mija_." He wasn't quite sure if that was a lie or an attainable promise, but as he heard familiar foot-falls heading in their direction, he knew that he had no more need to worry. The sound of the door opening caused Lotti to look up and Eric watched her sweet little face break into a wide, blissfully happy smile. She dropped the worm for good this time, moving as fast as she could across the room until she was scooped up into Calleigh's awaiting arms.

"Oh, baby girl, I've missed you." Calleigh muttered into Lotti's neck, catching Eric's worried eyes as he stood in front of her, saying nothing. She didn't want to address that worry just yet, she wasn't ready. All she wanted so desperately to do, was hold Lotti in her arms and she was grateful to Eric for intuitively knowing that. Eric's brows were creased together and he could see in her eyes, that she'd noticed. But as he studied her, he couldn't see how she could possibly fault him for his concern. She had scrapes on her cheeks and forearms and small stitches on her hairline. To many it would seem like she was barely even scathed, but to him it was the straw upon the camels back, the mouse in the boat, whatever kind of metaphor you wanted to consider as the one very last thing, that broke him.

"Cal," He breathed, reaching out for her, but she took a step back. He flinched, feeling a shiver run through him as she hugged their daughter closer to her chest as though holding on for dear life. And he knew it was because she knew exactly what he was going to say. She'd always known. And she was doing the same thing she'd always done, regardless of all the steps they'd made together, all the growing they'd done, she was running away.

"I can't do this right now, Eric." She whispered, carefully untangling Lotti from her arms and handing her to him. "I have to go." She kissed her daughter's forehead, brushing a stray curl back from her crystal green eyes before she turned to leave the room.

"You're just going to walk out?" He boomed after her and she froze with her hand on the door.

"Eric, this is my job."

"And we're your family." He rasped, mimicking her earlier action of hugging Lotti closer.

Calleigh slowly turned with a look of pure anguish on her face. He could see that she was fighting with tears and losing the battle faster than she could summon the will to fight it, but she hadn't cried, not yet. He wasn't even entirely sure where he'd mustered the courage to ask the unthinkable of her, but the thought of living without her was a much more unpleasant one in his mind. "Eric," She whispered and he shook his head.

"We can't keep doing this, Cal."

"I can't just leave, Eric, this is my job. This is what I do, it's what I _want_ to do."

"And being a mother is less important?" That stung, he knew it did and by the look on her face as she arched back, he knew that he'd crossed a line. He knew that Lotti meant more to Calleigh than anything. He knew that she treasured their daughter above anything else and not just because they couldn't have anymore, not just because Lotti was the end of the line for her, but because she'd sacrificed so much to get her. Now he was asking her to sacrifice again and a part of him really did understand why she was fighting it. It had been easier for him to walk away, but then again, he wasn't defined by the lab like she was. He'd always been a man that worked for CSI. Calleigh on the other hand, was CSI incarnate. He'd been able to just drop everything and walk away, but she didn't have it in her to do that. Sometimes he saw that as a strength, today, it was her weakness.

"How dare you." She rasped, standing several feet away from him, though the longer she stared at him with that kind of pain in her eyes, the more it seemed like she was drifting further and further away.

"Calleigh, you know that's not what I meant." And it wasn't, not really. He knew that being a mother was the very first thing she thought of in the morning, the very last thing she did at night. Lotti was her world, but CSI had been her child before he and her had even been friends, CSI was part of her before he was, before Lotti was and in a way, that had always scared him just a little. He'd always silently worried that if it was ever going to come down to him or CSI, that he wasn't going to have enough points to get him ahead. So many of her other relationships had lost out to that lab and he'd never liked the idea that married or not married, there was still something profound between her and those glass halls that couldn't be severed.

"It may not have been what you meant, Eric," She chewed on her lip, finding it harder to speak through the slight treble in her voice. "but it's what you said. And that means something."

"No, Cal," Carefully, Eric set Lotti down on the ground. They each paused for a moment, watching their little girl cross the room on unsteady legs with her denim skirt bunched up from the way her Father had been holding her. Her little striped tights were twisted and Eric caught the faint smile on his wife's lips as she noticed the ruffles of her little pink onsie, poking out the top of her skirt. He wasn't particularly an artist when it came to dressing Lotti and he was glad that even in her pain, she still appreciated the rather interesting combinations he did come up with. Once sure that Lotti had found her way to the toys just fine, safe in the knowledge that her parents were right there and not really angry, beneath the surface, she occupied herself and Eric crossed the room to Calleigh, reaching to grasp her elbows. "no, it doesn't mean a thing. I'm just scared." He whispered.

Calleigh's eyes widened. She was sure that she could count on her hands the amount of times he'd admitted to being scared in the time she'd known him, all of which had something to do with her, no matter how indirectly and she did feel a pang of guilt for that. But she couldn't back down. What he was asking was too much and she was frightened too, that he was going to stoop to the level of using himself and Lotti against her. She didn't want him to play the love card again, because she was scared that she'd actually give in and she didn't want to imagine what she could possibly do with her life after that. Because Calleigh Duquesne without a ballistics lab, was Calleigh Delko with an apron and an SUV parked outside an elementary school gate and as much as she loved her daughter, it just didn't sound right.

But he was right and as she lowered her arms from her chest, letting the tension drift away from her shoulders, she could admit that he was right to be scared. But he was giving up completely and she couldn't let that happen. She couldn't let him ask her to take the easy road when she'd never taken the easy road in her life, she didn't know how to read the street signs.

"Eric," She licked her lips, glancing down to Lotti for a moment as she made an indistinguishable noise as she pulled building blocks from the toy bucket. "I know that you're scared, and you've got a right to be scared." He nodded. "I'm scared too."

"Then why can't you do this? We talked about this."

"And every time we talked about it, Eric, I told you that I can't just quit here. I can't leave."

"You're not obligated to stay."

"No," She swallowed. "but several years ago I told John that I was walking this road with Horatio and I can't just leave him now." Eric flinched at the mention of Hagen, knowing that the image of that man's dead body in her lab still haunted her steps. But it was just another one of her ghosts and for some reason, she'd found a way to live with it. Calleigh always found a way, that was part of why he loved her.

"He wouldn't judge you, Cal, things are different now."

"They're the same." She defended.

"No, Cal, they're not. You have a daughter now, you have a family. We have a _home_."

"But that lonely road he's walking is still the same. And he still needs me. I would think that you, of all people, would understand."

"Calleigh, I understand. But he'd be the last person to ever ask you to do this."

"I know," She cast her eyes down to her toes, listening to Eric's breathing and Lotti beating two different blocks together. "that's why I'm not waiting for him to ask."

Eric was growing impatient. Too many times over the last year, had she shut him down, told him to stop asking her to quit the job that she loved. She knew why he asked and she knew that every time he did, she only loved him all the more for wishing he could keep her safe forever. It was his way, it was what he did. And she knew he'd do it to Lotti all the more with each passing year. But he was growing tired of asking, of practically begging because while he saw why she was so tied to this place, he never quite knew how deep it went. "Calleigh, you could have died today!" He boomed and she stared at him when Lotti jumped. The little girl found her way back to her toys, thankfully, but both of her parents were none too impressed with his outburst. Calleigh paced with her arms crossed over her chest, completely oblivious to the wound in her leg that he was now aware of. "And you're limping, Calleigh. God, what were you thinking!?"

She glared at him angrilly, choosing to ignore the fact that she really was limping, if only slightly because it wasn't like the nail had gone in deep. She had a bandage, nothing more and she'd already changed from the black slacks she'd had on that were now sporting a terrible, blood-stained hole.

"Yes," She seethed. "I could have died today. And there is a man lying in hospital fighting for his life because of me. Don't you think I know that, Eric? Don't you think I understand why he did that for me? My wounds are nothing compared to what he took for my sake." She stepped back from him, crossing her arms over her chest again. "What would it look like if I ran away now? His sacrifice would be for nothing!"

"His sacrifice was so that you could come home to your daughter!" He yelled, waving his arms about, no longer wondering if Lotti was watching them because there was no doubt that she was. Silent and staring at them, because she never understood why suddenly, Momma and Papi could be so angry and so in love with her at the same time.

"And what kind of jerk would I look like if I just walked away, Eric?" She yelled back.

"You're not a jerk." He choked and Calleigh narrowed her eyes.

"I would be, if I let him die for me and then just walked away."

"I have spent too much time waiting for you to be okay, Calleigh." He lowered his voice, the pain clear as day with each word that passed his lips and Calleigh was transfixed by it. "First the cancer and the chemo and the surgery and I know that it was harder for you, I know that it was excruciating and I am so proud to look at you now and see the beautiful woman that I fell in love with thirteen years ago, but Cal," He stepped closer to her, reaching out to grasp her upper arms, caressing them lovingly as she had to tilt her head up to meet his eyes. "I can't just sit by and wait for your luck to run out. I can't watch you suffer again."

"Eric," She breathed and he silenced her by opening his mouth to speak.

"I'm terrified that next time you're not going to come home."

The air around them seemed to thicken as Calleigh realised that his fears were running far deeper than they ever had before. Ever since he left CSI, she knew that he'd waved goodbye in the morning with a sense of dread in his heart, not because he didn't trust her to protect herself, but because he couldn't be there to see that she was alright, each and every day. Reaching up, she pressed her palm to his cheek, running the pad of her thumb over his bottom lip as she swallowed nervously, knowing that they were never going to come to the same conclusion on this, but knowing that this wasn't something that they could compromise on. It wasn't an argument she could simply let him win for the sake of peace because both of them knew that they each felt passionately and contrary to each other. It didn't happen often and it scared her, but it was necessary. "Eric," She smiled faintly, feeling his hands pressed to the small of her back and pulling her closer until she could feel his belt-buckle against her taut belly. "I'm always going to come home."

"You can't know that." He practically whimpered and it was breaking her heart, to see him so desperate, but she couldn't back down and he knew that, she could see it in his eyes.

"No," She lowered her eyes to his chest and pressed a brief kiss above his heart. "I can't know that," She looked back up into his eyes. "but I have to believe it." He studied her, brushing his hands through her hair and faintly touching the tips of his fingers to the stitches on her hairline. It wasn't just the first of many bumps and bruises that she was going to come home with, and he knew that, wasn't even quite sure why he'd thought he could win the argument. But after spending the better part of the last two years watching her suffer, he couldn't barely fathom how she could walk back in there and be willing to do it all over again out of loyalty. He couldn't even call it an addiction, because she wasn't an adrenaline junkie. But she had an acute sense of right and wrong and he knew that there was no better job in the world for her. He knew that she had long ago, planned to grow old in these halls and even though he'd fight her the whole way, she was never going to relent. CSI was a large part of why he'd fallen for her, why he'd thought she was the most fascinating woman he'd ever met, because he'd never seen a woman so in love with guns and tools and catching the bad-guys, who could still remember the steps to 'Swan Lake' and dance them. "I need you to believe it too, Eric."

He nodded, kissing her forehead. He knew that it was something they were always going to disagree on, but he could see where she stood and he knew that no matter how many times he asked her, he could never forcefully pull her away. He'd always thought that no-one could do the job like her and it was probably hypocritical of him to change his tune only now that he wasn't there to watch over her, but he couldn't help the aching pain in his chest when Lotti waddled down the hall in her diaper of a morning, begging her mother for one last cuddle before she went to work. Holding Calleigh close to his chest, he turned them to look down at their little girl. She'd dropped onto her bottom, twisting a building block between her stubby little fingers as she watched them watching her. Her vocabulary consisted of barely much more than Momma, Papi and a small handful of Spanish words that were barely distinguishable, but her eyes had always said more and they both immediately felt guilty for subjecting her to a moment they'd always promised themselves, they'd never let her see.

Breaking from Eric's hold, Calleigh stepped towards her and quickly picked her up, resting her on her hip and nuzzling her cheek with her nose, knowing that it'd make the tiny girl giggle. And it worked, Lotti buried her face in Calleigh's neck as she laughed, wrapping her short little arms around her mother as they rejoined Eric in the middle of the room. "It doesn't matter where I work, Eric," Calleigh smiled up at him. Thankful when she felt his hand press to the spot just between her shoulder blades. "we've got our own little team now," She kissed Lotti's nose. "I'm always going to come home to this. And you know that no matter what happens, I'll never let anything get in the way of it."

"I know." He nodded, hugging her closer and dropping a kiss to her lips. "I just," He breathed, looking to Lotti and twirling one of her curly pig-tails between his fingers. "I worry."

"I know, it's why I love you."

"I hope that's not the only reason." He smirked and Calleigh chuckled, skating her free hand down his spine until it rested at the small of his back, just against the waist of his jeans.

"No," She grinned. "it's definately not the only reason."

They stood there for a time, the three of them just holding one another and Eric felt his panic ebb away. He had Calleigh's head rested against his chest and both she and Lotti were in his arms. For now they were safe and he was glad of that, glad that he knew that Calleigh really would fight tooth and nail to always get home. And he knew that she wasn't the only woman at MDPD who had kids at home, and she most certainly wasn't the only woman who worked the field knowing that she was going to have to make sure she didn't get shot, just to make it home in time for dinner. She wasn't alone there and maybe he worried because he didn't trust that he wasn't there to protect her. But if he was completely honest with himself, not just half-way there like he had been, he could admit that there were people there that would give their lives to protect her, knowing what she had waiting for her at home. Neither he nor she liked the idea of her life being more important than those she worked with, but it was a comfort to him to know that there were people there that would give what he would give, to ensure his daughter would always have a mother, and he was grateful to them for that. Even this Walter that he'd only met once, seemed to know intuitively, just what was at stake when he stepped out of the lab with her.

"I have to get back to work," Calleigh whispered, knowing that breaking the moment was going to break his heart, but she owed it to Walter to discover who did this. "I need to figure out who made that bomb."

Eric understood and he nodded, taking Lotti from her again even though the little girl protested. Calleigh hugged her tightly, pressing kisses to her cheeks and letting Lotti run her little fingers through her hair as she stepped up on her tip-toes to kiss Eric again. "We'll see you tonight." He smiled and Calleigh kissed him again, harder, letting him know that he could always make that statement and she'd always live up to it. Even if he constantly feared and doubt it. Never doubted her, just the situations she found herself in because he knew so well, the trouble they seemed to attract. But she was always the cautious one and he had to give her credit for that. Afterall, she wasn't the one that had disappeared to Rio five years ago. She was the one that stayed home and guarded their good names, he had to trust her, even if he found it hard to do so.

"Yeah."

Eric watched her walk through the door, trying to ignore her slight limp and hoping that by the afternoon, it was going to be gone. She was strong and she was passionate and she was as stubborn, if not moreso than him. She was going to be a CSI for as long as she could and he was going to have to find a way to make that seem like a good thing, even if sometimes he didn't feel that way. Even if the fact that she was the best, sometimes slipped his mind when she and Lotti were rolling on the floor of the livingroom in fits of giggles, covered in glitter and sequins.

"Will you come with me to the hospital tonight?" She asked sweetly, just before she closed the door behind her. "I promised him that I'd visit, hopefully he'll be awake by then."

"Yeah." He swallowed the lump in his throat. "Sure."

"Okay," She smiled again. "see you tonight."

"See you tonight." He whispered, but she was already gone. Taking a deep breath, he hoisted Lotti up higher on his hip and smiled at her, loving the way her green eyes sparkled mischievously like her mother's. "Want some jello?" He asked and she grinned widely, dropping the block from her hands as she clapped excitedly. "Yeah, sounds awesome to me too." He chuckled, hoping to alleviate his own worries that seemed to come back to him more and more, the further down the hall he could see Calleigh walk, until she was completely out of his sight and he and Lotti were left standing alone in the middle of the waiting room. "Momma's gonna be fine, _mija_." He promised, even though it was more to himself than his daughter, because Lotti had never worried at all. To her, her mother was all knowing, all powerful and gave the best hugs the universe had to offer. To her, Momma read bedtime stories and Papi took her on clandestine Jello trips while Momma was at work. To her the world was simple, because it consisted of him, Calleigh, toys and food and sometimes he was jealous of that.

TBC.


	34. Chapter 34

WOW! This has been one hell of a long time coming. I'm so sorry guys!! I've had so many emails and tweets over the last couple of months, asking me to continue this and I'm so sorry that I haven't. What with losing my computer and then saving for a new one, having no access during the day and no inspiration in the small pockets of time I had to use the computer, really killed the mood. But this chapter is UP! It's actually completely different to the first draft that I lost, but that's alright. I actually like it. Essentially, this is it for the story. But, before you FREAK OUT, just read - It is the end, in the conventional sense of the word. But I do have a prologue in the works that will be anywhere from a 5,000 word single chapter, to two. We'll see, I have quite an in-depth little plot building for that one. So I hope you can hold out on it.

With this chapter, I was feeling a little nostalgic, hence all the talk of Speed. Just so you know it's not completely out of left field.

Anyway, I really hope that you can enjoy this and can I just share a little shameless pimping for a good cause? I'm going to anyway.

Does anyone reading this story watch "_Legend of the Seeker_"? If you do (if you don't rectify that NOW) please head to my twitter for links to petitions, campaigns and donations regarding saving the show from cancellation. It's an AMAZING and BEAUTIFUL show that honestly, deserves far more than 2 seasons. They're threatening to take it away from us and we can't just let that go without a fight. If terrible shows like 'Merlin' (I honestly, DON'T like it and it's in the same sort of genre as 'Legend of the Seeker') can keep on going, then anything is possible. Other shows have been brought back from the brink before, it can be done. Even if you don't much care, please re-tweet the petitions and the campaigns, anything and everything helps! And I'd really appreciate it. (Sorry for the pimping, on with story.)

_**

* * *

And there you stand open heart - open doors**_  
_**Full of life with the world that's wanting more**_  
_**But I can see when the lights starts to fade**_  
_**The day is gone and your smile has gone away.**_  
_May I, _Trading Yesterday

* * *

The tension throughout the halls was palpable. Everyone had heard their raised voices coming from the waiting room and even though only those closest to the doors had heard what the argument had been about, everyone felt the pain right down to their bones, with the possibility of Calleigh and Eric being so at odds. They'd heard the yelling and they'd heard the ominous silence that had followed; knowing not if they'd fallen into angered staring or found a way to make up. And as he watched them leave the room, Eric with their daughter on his hip, headed for the elevator and Calleigh with a purposeful stride in his direction; his brow furrowed in turmoil for them.

Eric's strides were fast but long and he could see from the tension in Calleigh's shoulders and how she walked with short, clipped steps, that something was still bothering her. Eric didn't seem too destraught. He was smiling with Lotti as the elevator doors closed them inside and he even dipped his head with an expression he couldn't read, when Calleigh had momentarily turned her head and met his eye. He watched her then, as her husband and daughter disappeared and he noticed the faint pull at the edge of her lips. She wanted to smile, she did, but something was stopping her. Something was making her feel that she didn't have the right.

"Calleigh," He addressed her and she looked up at him, blinking as he stepped up to her.

"Horatio," She did smile then. Though the kind of smile that she offered him required far less effort, for it was an empty, professional platitude that could be easily mistaken for a warm and friendly welcome, had he been anyone less. He didn't call her on it though, knowing there was no malice intended in her standoff-ish behaviour. "I'm sorry, I haven't had a chance to analyse the fragments yet. I've been," She paused and glanced towards the closed elevator and he watched her, watched her fingers twitch and spin her wedding bands. "a little distracted."

"That's okay," He smiled softly, dipping his head to move closer though doing his best to avoid invading her space. When she was like this, her space was sacred. "do you need more time, ma'am? Did you want me to have Landau come in."

She looked up at him sharply. "No," She shook her head. "No, I'm fine. I just," She huffed out a breath, letting her shoulders sag just a little. "it's just Eric. He wants me to quit CSI."

"And what do you want?"

Calleigh smirked amusedly. "Horatio, you know what I want. And so does he."

"Perhaps what you want, and what's best, can't always go hand in hand."

Calleigh seemed to consider it for a moment, studying her rings closely and breathing deeply. She had to admit that she had thought about the prospect of leaving, far more often than she'd admitted to Eric out loud. But each and every time she'd come to the thought that she could possibly handle leaving, she'd come up with a plethora of reasons to stay. Far too many to disregard and she knew that she'd go stark raving mad, in any other occupation. She could run a shooting range, but she'd worked in one during school and she'd never been too fond of the kind of guys that hit on her in those places. She could work for an independant lab, but she'd constantly be itching to go out into the field. And she could hand in her badge, but she'd always feel like there was more she could have done. She'd always feel that she was throwing in the towel and she knew she'd never be able to watch the news or read about a murder in the paper and not think of what she could have done to help them catch the killer.

She couldn't help everyone, she knew that. But being at CSI and knowing that she could help some of them, was something that made her life with Eric and Lotti all the more precious. Knowing that she had them, in a world where human cruelty ran rampant around her, made time worth turning. She didn't know how she'd cope if she didn't have that contrast and she was scared to think that they could ever mean less to her than they did when she thought any day soon, could be her last. It was a reckless thought she knew, but it was the kind of reckless that made her who she was and she knew that if anyone could understand, it was Eric. And that's why she knew in her heart that while he was still hurting and wishing for it to be different, he wasn't going to ask her again.

"This is what's best, Horatio." She smiled more genuinely this time. "Eric knows that, he knew it when he asked and he knew it when I refused. He has to come to terms with the fact that I'm not leaving and he will, I'm sure of it. It'll just take time, I think."

"He's stubborn." Horatio smirked.

Calleigh's eyes laughed and she looked up at him incredulously. "And I'm not?"

Horatio chuckled openly, something he rarely did. "I suppose you're right. Just," He sobered up. "remember what he's been through, Calleigh. Think of what you've both been through, particularly in these last two years. Give it some time, let things cool down and perhaps, in a while, consider it again."

"I thought you wouldn't want me to leave." She frowned and Horatio reached for her hand, gripping it gently between them and he smiled.

"I don't. But family is more important than this, Calleigh." He gestured around them.

"But you've spent your whole life here. You love it here."

He nodded, letting his eyes drop to their hands as he brought his other up to rest on top. Calleigh felt the cool metal of his sunglasses against he back of her knuckles and her lips twitched as though she'd just realised that it was Horatio Caine, holding her. "Do you think I wouldn't trade the thirty years I've worked for PD for a chance to go back and watch Kyle take his first step?"

And that's when it hit her, what he'd lost. She could see it in his slouched shoulders, his weathered brow. She could see it in the calm, controlled swagger of a man that had nothing left to lose and she realised then, that she didn't want to be that kind of ghost. She didn't want to be the kind of mother that saw her child on her one day off and only played with her when she didn't have a million and one case files to peruse. She didn't want to be the kind of wife that screamed at her husband for miniscule things because it was the big things they couldn't talk about and she didn't want to be the kind of wife, that after twenty years, no longer knew how to understand her husband because they spent every waking moment apart.

But then, she still felt that she couldn't leave and the weight of that notion seemed to want to drag her through the floor.

"Okay," She sighed. "I'll think about it. Maybe we'll be able to find a way to work together on it." She smiled hopefully and Horatio patted her hand, letting it go gently to fall back to her side.

"So," He smirked. "are we ready to get back to the case at hand."

"I'll have my report on the bomb ready in a couple of hours." She nodded. The conflicted nature of their conversation was forgotten for now and her manner was completely business. It was a trait Horatio knew, was invaluable in his second in command and despite his words, he knew that his department would suffer without her. He didn't want to lose her, but he'd watch her go with a smile if it meant she'd never lose her family.

But as she walked away and he watched her go, an idea struck him. It was something that had been building for some time, something he'd put a lot of thought into over the years, as he'd watched Calleigh grow and change and learn. And he felt, now that she had mellowed in her demeanor but not in her heart, while she'd strengthened and she'd sobered and she'd aged, professionally, he was starting to think that she just might be ready. She'd always been a spitfire, that was something that he'd taken as a positive in her reviews, not a negative, when he'd hired her. 'Speaks out of turn' had been one comment review, but he'd read that as 'says what her superiors don't want to hear'. He'd learnt he was right, on her first day in the lab and it had been then that he'd decided that she had a bright future. He'd needed smart people that weren't afraid of disagreeing.

Now she was a wife and mother and still the strongest person he knew. Now, he felt that she was more than ready.

* * *

**_And who could heed the words of Charlie Darwin_**  
**_The lords of war just profit from decay_**  
**_And trade their children's promise for the jingle_**  
**_The way we trade our hard earned time for pay_**  
_~ Charlie Darwin, _The Low Anthem

* * *

Before closing up her locker, she took one final glance, running her fingers along the photo of Lotti that Eric had taped to the inside. She smiled to herself silently, listening to the click of the metal lock as it closed tight for the night. She was ready to go home. There was tiring days and then there was the day that had been thrust upon her by a crazed, narcessistic bomb maker who thought that planting poorly constructed - yet incredibly effective - bombs in the most crowded areas of Miami, was the best way to get attention for their narrow-minded and fascist beliefs, Eric's irrational - yet rational - attempts to make her leave the job she loved and Ryan's ever present foot in his mouth. Sometimes it was just too much. But most of the time, these days, there wasn't anything a small smile from her daughter couldn't fix.

She found herself wondering, for the second time in not so long, what Speed would think of her now; she was a mother and a wife and a supervisor. She had responsibilities that he'd never known her to bear and she'd always looked up at him like a big brother. She'd known Horatio far longer, but she'd always been so much closer to Eric and Speed, closer to Speed even, as ironic as that sounded considering she was weighing that against the man, her best friend, come; her husband. Closer to Speed, she smiled, slowly lowering herself down to sit on the bench beside her handbag; but she loved Eric. It was different.

"I thought you'd have already headed home." Horatio's voice startled her slightly and she looked up, smiling nervously as she rubbed her hands together between her knees.

"I am," She licked her lips. "just packing up and then I'm off. I'm picking up Lotti from Carmen's and I'm going to meet Eric at the Hospital, to see Walter."

"I'm glad I caught you then." He smiled, sitting down on the bench beside her. His leg was barely an inch from hers, their shoulders were touching and she could feel his breath on the side of her face whenever he turned to her. But she wasn't uncomfortable with the closeness. It warmed her, like a hug from her father or a kiss to the forehead from her brother. It made her smile.

"Yeah?" She questioned, dragging her handbag into her lap, feigning to search for something in it's depths. She could see that he had something to talk about and she feared that maybe he was going to have something more to say about what happened this morning with Walter, what happened with Eric. She feared that he was going to side with his brother-in-law.

"Yeah." His smile was warm and pleasant but she found herself nodding and letting her chin drop to her chest, letting her hair fall across her face just a little. She wasn't sure if she could handle it, were he asking her to step away. "I wanted to ask a favour of you."

"Oh?" She didn't quite lift her head, but it raised a little; curious.

"Yes," She could hear the smirk on his lips. After fourteen years, she knew this man as well as she knew the one that shared her bed. Well, knew him as well as she was willing to, consdering the comparison. "You know, Calleigh, I'm not getting any younger."

Her head did lift then and she met his eyes suddenly. "Horatio, I," He raised a hand and she silenced.

"There's nothing to worry about. But, you've done a great job over the years. You're one of the best CSIs I've ever worked with and I was just thinking that, it's about time you were rewarded for it."

Calleigh sucked in her bottom lip. "I don't; I don't understand."

Slipping down lower, resting his elbows on his knees with his sunglasses dangling from his fingers in between, Horatio met her lowered eyes. "I'm putting you up for promotion, Calleigh."

Her breath caught in her throat. "Hor-"

He cut her off with a small smile. "Lieutenant Duquesne, has a nice ring you it, don't you think?"

"But, Horatio," She protested. "there can't be two Lieutenants running the same shift, it's not done. I don't want to-"

"It'll take months for the paperwork to go through, you'll need to be trained, you'll need to be assessed. That's time enough for me to get my affairs in order."

Calleigh's breath quickened as she wrapped her small hand around his wrist, begging him with her eyes, not to do this. "Horatio, you can't leave."

"Yes I can." He smiled, that smile that always made her feel that somewhere deep down, he was a man that had always wanted a daughter and that in some way, she'd brought him a small measure of that joy. "I will do this, Calleigh. I'm getting old and you're over qualified to be doing the job that you're doing. You deserve acknowledgement and you deserve the flexibility and the safety, so that you can be home for your family."

"Please don't do this just because Eric and I had a fight. We fight all the time, but," She whimpered. "but we make up and we smile and it's never a big deal when we wake up in the morning. We're married, we're supposed to fight, Horatio. Don't do this just because you feel that you need to help."

He wrapped his arm around her shoulders gently. "That's not why I'm doing it."

She looked at him confusedly.

"Fourteen years ago, a young CSI spoke out of turn. She told me about a new research into comparing bullets. She made me realise that times were changing and that the lab needed to change with them. She taught me that science evolves and we need to evolve with it or drown." Tears were streaming down Calleigh's face as Horatio curled her hand into both of his own. "It's her turn now. I've gone as far as I can, Calleigh. You're the future of this place, you always were." He reached up, touching her cheek gently. "You helped me bring this place to life. Now it's your turn to keep it going."

* * *

**_If ever you're in doubt,_**  
**_In case you haven't noticed._**  
**_There's nothing I won't do to make it up,_**  
**_I just wanna thank you for all that you've done._**  
_Thank you, _Sean John

* * *

Rapping his knuckles against the window-pane gently, Eric waited for movement on the bed before he made his way into the room. It was darkened and the curtains were drawn, so he didn't want to wake the sleeping occupant if he could help it. But, there was movement and a gravelly voice that called for him to come in. Slowly, he made his way around the bed, seeing that there was no other way for the man to lay but face down. He studied his back, wondering for a moment as he paused, where and how many had hit him.

"You're gonna have to come around here," He waved his arm out, wincing. "-there ain't a chance I'm gonna be able to see you. Who is it, anyway?"

Eric smiled as he dipped his head into view, stowing his hands in his pockets as he met the man's eye. "Hey, I think we met like, once before. I'm Eric."

"Right," Walter grimaced, not at the thought but at a sharp pain that radiated from his lower back. "Calleigh's husband."

He nodded. "Yeah, look, she's kind of why I'm here."

Walter tipped his head to the chair in the corner of the room and Eric smirked, grabbing it by the backrest and dragging it over so that Walter didn't have to strain his neck to see him. "I'm a bit drugged up, sorry." Walter admonished but Eric shook his head.

"Nah, it's alright, man. I just," He took a deep breath, lowering his voice because he knew that what he had come here to do was going to be difficult. Not because the sentiment was difficult to stomach, actually it was completely the opposite. It was difficult, because he didn't quite know how to say it in any way that would give it's depth justice. To be truely grateful, beyond reckoning; he just didn't know how to put it into words. Too many times in the past two years, had he been so very thankful. And too many times had he lacked the eloquence to voice it. A simple 'thank you' just wasn't enough, but so often that's all he knew how to say. He wanted to thank her doctors; but then he'd looked into Calleigh's eyes and seen that it was her unwillingness to let go that had saved her. He wanted to thank the world, the stars and the universe for Lotti; but even then he couldn't help but feel there was something divine involved. Be it that or pure, unbridled, luck. He was raised to believe in both and couldn't sway his heart. So he'd taken to thanking the silence around him, with his face buried in thickened blonde hair and the smell of vanilla filling his senses in the middle of the night, peppering reverant kisses along her neck. But even that had never been enough. "-I came here to say, thank you, I guess."

Walter chuckled, tucking his hands under his pillow and sitting up as high as he could manage. "You mean, for saving Calleigh?"

Eric nodded silently.

"Geez, man, you don't have to thank me. I didn't do it for that."

Eric pulled in a deep breath. "I know, It's just; I don't know if you understand what you did for her today. What you did for me."

Walter smiled a knowing, calming smile. "When we were walking through that market this morning," He was still smiling and Eric couldn't help but feel that there was something profound to it. "she was telling me that your little girl said her first word and you know, the smile on her face..." Walter bit his lip, grinning and Eric ducked his head, pressing his eyes closed as he nodded slowly. "...I knew that I couldn't let anything destroy that."

Eric looked up. "But you stood in front of a bomb for her. Not many people would be willing to do that."

"Hey," Walter shrugged as best he could. "there was no way I was letting her take that hit. You can see what it's done to me, she wouldn't have survived; I think we all know that." Eric's breath shuddered for a moment, hearing what they all knew, voiced so suddenly. And he could see by the bandages and the cushions and the tubes. He knew that if it had been Calleigh, the damage would have been irreparable. "Not only that, I respect her. And, I'd do it again."

Eric released a sigh. "If you ever, need anything."

Walter nodded, understanding the half-completed promise for what it was. "And if you're ever worried, just know that there isn't a single one of us down there at CSI that wouldn't do what I did today."

Eric smirked. "Even Wolfe?"

"Especially Wolfe." Walter laughed. "But I know you know that."

"Yeah," Eric sighed, scuffing his toe along the rail on the floor beneath the bed. "I know."

* * *

**_(I Know You've Got A Little Life In You Yet)_**  
**_ Give Me Your Hand Baby, _**  
**_ (I Know You've Got A Lot Of Strength Left)_**  
**_ Give Me Your Pretty Hand,_**  
**_ (I Know You've Got A Little Life In You Yet)_**  
_~ This Woman's Work_, Maxwell

* * *

Eric had been sitting with Walter, laughing and chatting for what felt like hours. He respected the man greatly, not only for what he'd done for Calleigh, but his entire outlook on the job that Eric found himself missing, from time to time. What he missed about it was the cases, the puzzles and the profound feeling that he was giving something back to the country that his parents had fought so hard to bring him to. The country that had opened it's arms and given him the better life it promised.

That aside, he had no intentions of going back and still harboured the faint glimmer of hope that Calleigh would decide to spend her days diving with him rather than combing her way through bomb fragments and bullet casings. But he knew the hope was faint and pointless. She was never going to give it up and he was callous for asking her to. Of all of them, she was the one that was in it for the long haul. She was the one that would make Lieutenant, the one that would make Director; She was the one that, if any of them could get that far, would make State Commisioner. Even Speed had known that

He smiled at the thought of Speed, casting a glance over at Walter and seeing that the man had dozed off for the third time, he smirked and thought about the memories he'd shared with his long lost friend. Considering it, he felt a small, sharp pain in his heart as he looked up to the window, seeing Calleigh standing there with their beautiful, stunning little girl rested on her hip. They were both smiling and Calleigh was waving. In Lotti's excitement of seeing her father across the room, she was practically slapping at Calleigh's chest as she flailed in delight, shreiking her laughter, to which Eric could only grin.

Calleigh's smile turned sorrowful though, as she stood there, sharing a look with him. It was as though she knew just what he'd just been thinking. As though she felt, as well, the pain of being unable to share their future with Speed.

Eric had never thought that the pain would come to be so bad, or lasting. Sitting in his heart like a dull ache that withered, but never completely went away. Keeping Speed's credit card inside his wallet, he supposed, didn't really help him in seeking closure. But it was a mere trifle. Speedle was a colleague and sure, most of their weekends had been spent lounging on Calleigh's couch with beers, fried chicken and sweet tea, after all of which, Calleigh would hound them until they took a jog down the beach - Sometimes he wasn't so grateful that she lived so close to the water. But he was a colleague and the pain _should_ have been nothing more than the pain of losing a colleague. It wasn't like they'd lost a brother. But then, he thought, the longer they went without Speed's dry, sarcastic, wit, the more he realised that their colleagues - Speed, Horatio, Alexx - were never just colleagues. And he really _had_ lost a brother. He even felt guilty on occasion, when he'd be down at the market or shopping with Calleigh and he'd open his phone to call Marisol before realising that she was never going to answer. He felt guilty that he could sometimes forget she was gone, but the lingering feeling of Speed's absence was always there.

Calleigh would tell him that it was nothing to be ashamed of. Marisol was so engrained in his personal life that the idea of just picking up the phone and calling her was second nature, almost habit. It was nothing to be ashamed of to skip the pain and head straight for what he'd always taken for granted. But with Speed, it was always there. Every day Calleigh would come home talking of Ryan and Jesse and Walter; Natalia. The plaque in the lobby of MDPD with Speed's name engraved in polished bronze, was a constant reminder. And now, being so happy - with Calleigh - he really felt that they were missing a leg.

Looking into her eyes, smiling as he matched Lotti's grin, he started to think that after all they'd suffered, maybe, Lotti was finally the replacement for what they'd lost. He'd thought that it was Ryan or even Natalia that was meant to fill that void. But he and Calleigh had become so much more closed off from office friendships after it happened that they just never found a way to be close enough to them. They filled a space, but not the gaping chasm that was left. He thought that maybe, finally, after pushing them to their very limits, and seeing them still standing tall, the God he'd prayed to all his life had finally gifted them with the most precious of treasures. Something to bring them back from the edge.

Beckoning them in with a wave of his hand, Eric pressed a finger to his lips to shush them as Calleigh made her way in. Doing her best to calm her over-excited daughter. Eric stood quickly, taking Lotti into his arms to calm her quickly so that she wouldn't wake Walter. Calleigh just rolled her eyes as Lotti wrapped her arms around Eric's neck and looked down at Calleigh as though she'd just won a prize. Mommy's little girl, Daddy's little Angel. Calleigh laughed silently.

"He's sleeping?" She whispered, wrapping her arm around Eric's waist as he rested his across her shoulders.

He nodded. "Yeah. Just dozed off again. We had a good talk today. He's a great guy."

"Yeah," Calleigh smiled. "I like him." She took a breath, waiting a beat before looking up at him, smiling at the sight of her daughter's curly-haired head resting on his shoulder. "You look very thoughtful."

Eric sighed, hugging her tighter into his side, to which she only hugged him back, resting her palm to his stomach. "Yeah, I was just thinking about Speed; Marisol."

Calleigh nodded, taking a deep breath as she pressed her eyes closed. "Yeah. It's been so long. I wish they could have seen what's become of us."

"They can."

Calleigh looked back up into his eyes as he turned down to her. She smirked. "And you know this?"

He chuckled quietly. "It's a thought that just came to me. I mean, if anyone's up there rooting for us, it's them. Someone had to have put in a word for us, considering." He shrugged.

Calleigh smiled thoughtfully. "It's a nice thought."

They stood there in silence for a time, holding each other and listening to the beeping of machines that surrounded Walter's bed. Finally, with a deep sigh, Eric felt at peace. Thinking about Speed and Marisol and realising that Calleigh was still as passionate about her work as she was ever going to be, realising that she couldn't have better people around her to care for and protect her when he couldn't, his heart felt lighter. He felt safer in the idea of sitting by her side, sixty years from now, with a pitcher of sweet tea and a plate of home-made cookies, watching the world pass them by, watching their grandchildren play as he held her hand tightly in his own. He felt safer in the knowledge that she was going to do everything in her power to get there.

Calleigh broke the silence with a sigh and a squeeze of his hip and Eric broke his reverie to look down, realising that his gaze had drifted back to the bed.

"Eric," She hesitated, her voice wavering just slightly. He dipped his head, kissing her temple and grinning as Lotti rested her tiny hand against his cheek.

"What is it, babe?"

She smiled sweetly at the endearment. Looking up into his eyes, so close she could kiss his lips. She breathed again, searching his eyes. "I have, some news."

TBC.


End file.
